3. Valeria
3
Valeria
My room isn’t the way I left it. The posters on the walls have been torn down, replaced by boring bare white walls. The bed has a blanket, but it’s bunched up at the foot of it. Belongings are scattered along the carpet, and if I breathe in deeply enough, I smell blood.
Behind me, I feel the heat of Tommy’s chest radiating against my back. Despite knowing this is someone else’s room now, he didn’t bother to give me any sort of warning. Not that I’m owed one, but it would’ve been nice.
“Are you going to step inside, or keep staring?” There’s a shift in his voice, something deeper. Now that we’re alone, I realize my brother might have an influence on how he acts around me.
“This is someone’s room,” I state obviously, turning to glare up at him.
His nostrils flare, and he moves. Lifting his hands, he plants them on the door frame and stretches, blocking off any openings of escape. Now, I guess I only have one option. Stand here while he’s touching my back, or step inside.
“It’s mine ,” he reveals, catching me off guard. He takes one unbothered step forward, leaving my body no choice but to stumble forward.
Watching as he steps in and shuts the door, I immediately look around for anything to defend myself with. If it’s his room, I’m sure there’s a gun tucked away under his mattress.
“Touch anything, and you’ll regret it,” he warns in passing. Moving to the mattress with the disheveled blanket, he sinks down.
I’d describe him as loosening up a bit if he wasn’t so adamant about staring me down. Even now, his eyes don’t budge. His chest swells with an inhale, and for a few seconds, an eerie silence passes during our stare down.
Terrifyingly, I can’t tell what he’s thinking as he stares at me. Before, I could see the anger and the years of it collecting. Now, when he looks calm, I feel like this is more dangerous than before.
I wish I had my knife. It’s probably still lodged in the dirt outside.
He sniffs nonchalantly, his brows soon coming together. “I tried looking for you. The amount of time I spent in here searching for any clues, any hints of where you could’ve gone, I figured I might as well move my stuff in, you know?.” Rolling his neck, he looks more agitated while thinking about the past than the present.
“And my stuff?” I ask, stubbornly crossing my arms as I decide not to test how heavy his threat weighs.
He snorts. “Burned every last scrap. You’ve got nothing left here. More reason for you to have stayed away. Should’ve known you’d get into trouble while you were away. None of your brothers needed to be watched. But you were different. You were always the outlier.”
If I have to guess, he’s also recalling all those times I dragged him out to the city, begging to be social. How I had to get him to chase me to get out of our home. I hated being stuck in this house. Going stir-crazy half the time, the other half… Well, I couldn’t do squat when Tommy was trying to be a people-pleaser. Trying to do his job down to the description.
I guess that bit about him hasn’t changed. Even now, he’s doing whatever Santino wants.
No point in trying to find the man Tommy used to be. I’m going to have to get used to this guy instead. I’m going to have to learn how to bite my tongue again while I’m at it.
He’s mad that I wasn’t the submissive daughter I was designed to be. I didn’t fit into the mold and chose not to play my role.
They kept me here only for future use. All daughters in these families get married off to make ties. My mother warned me about it, always hyping it up to be something of value. It’s how she met my father.
Well, maybe I didn’t want to marry someone with power. Maybe I wanted someone more normal. Someone who didn’t see me as the sole daughter of this family and what perks could come from claiming me as their own, like any of the sons of the surrounding families.
Teenage Valeria wanted her stupid bodyguard, but knew he wouldn’t leave for her. Eight years older, he’d be dumb to do something so reckless. So, she slipped off to do everything on her own.
Simple as that.
I’ll take that information to the grave before I ever breathe a word about any past feelings. Now I look at Tommy and see he’s become everything I hate. Tainted by this cruel life, he wouldn’t know kindness if it slapped him in the face.
He’s been molded into a man full of hate and doomed to spill his blood because of this family. It’s a fate only someone foolish would want.
Just looking at him pisses me off.
“It was a mistake coming here,” I tell him, jerking my chin to look away from his intense stare. The weight behind his gaze is enough to make someone fold. “This was supposed to be easy. You, of all people, just had to make it complicated.”
Accountability. I’ve never been too good at acknowledging when things are my fault.
“Seems you had no other choices from the way I see it.” He clicks his tongue. “Imagine where you’d be if you didn’t stick your nose into trouble at every chance you get.”
“Fuck you.” Anger growing in my chest hot enough to burn a hole through my body, I clench my hands into tight fists. “You act like I’ve asked for this to happen to me.”
His eyes flash at my words, his brows lowering even deeper.
“You left on your own,” he reminds me with his voice lowering, his eyes lowering.. Taking me in like I’m hardly a threat, his body remains stiff like he’s ready to jump right back into action. Does he ever relax anymore?
“And if I could go back all those years, you know what?” My frown matches his. “I wouldn’t change a fucking thing.”
He moves to stand, and I swear I hear his teeth grind at my words. Probably shouldn’t poke a bear, but his attitude pisses me off. He’s got blinders on and can’t possibly see it in the same way as I have. I might as well be talking to a literal brick wall.
“You know, assuming Santino took your pinkies, I’d be putting all this cluster of anger at him. However, it feels like you’ve been harboring quite the grudge.” I jerk my chin up at him, meeting his dark gaze with my own once he erases the space between us.
Am I talking big game because my brother told him not to kill me? Possibly. However, if he wasn’t so busy glaring at my face, he’d notice my knees are knocking together.
I don’t remember ever being afraid of this man. However, I’m not blind. This isn’t the same pushover I grew up with. He’s completely flipped, coming off more cold and ruthless than I remember.
He might even be more dangerous than the man I ran away from.
Showing that he’s got some kind of control over his emotions, he pauses long enough to loosen his jaw. Once his frown has flattened, the tension in his shoulders loosens slightly.
“You think I should be mad at him ? Why, because he held the blade?” He shakes his head, his eyes lighting up in what looks like cruel amusement. “Your father took this one when you left.” Holding his hand up, his thumb grazes where his left pinkie would be. “I promised your brother that I’d bring you back. When I didn’t, he took the other.”
Despite talking about his missing fingers, there’s not an ounce of betrayal in his voice. Rather, he looks at his hands fondly.
“They’re a reminder when I need it,” he explains as he curls the rest of his fingers. “Now that you’re here, I won’t need to look any longer.”
His eyes lift, and my stomach clenches when a scowl curls onto his lips. Now he looks pissed.
“I’ve got the physical form of what killed the man I used to be right in front of me. A constant reminder.” Something else shifts in his gaze, and the warning bells blare in my head. “ You are the one who has burdened me. Therefore, you’re going to be the one to pay back what you’ve taken.”
I take one step back, he takes one forward.
“You can’t be serious. I can’t give you your fingers back.” It’s an obvious statement, but not as much as I think. Not when rage is what fills his eyes.
“It’s not about the fucking fingers,” he growls, snapping in return.
Clearly touching a sensitive topic here, I realize I’ve pretty much poked the bear with a hot iron fire poker.
Turning on my heel, I know when it’s time to run. There’s hardly ten feet to the door, and I move like my life depends on it. When it comes to this guy, it might actually.
He might be loyal to my brother, but accidents happen. I don’t think I want my blood to be what stains this carpet.
Reaching for the doorknob, his hand flattens against the door before I can even reach out to try to turn it. I don’t have time to look back at him, I can feel his breath tickling my throat. Leaning so close, he causes goosebumps to form on my skin.
“If you run, Valeria, I will chase you.” Promising his threat in a hushed whisper, a shiver crawls down my stomach and weighs heavy enough to make my legs shake. “Until I get what I want, you’re not leaving my sight. If I have to tie you to my bed to make it happen, then so be it.”
Taking in his calloused fingers spread against the wood, I try to keep my breathing even. “What do you want?”
Afraid to hear the answer, I hold my breath long enough to make my lungs burn. My heart is thudding so hard, I refuse to believe he can’t feel the thump against his chest as he leans against me. Finally, I feel the rumble that comes from him when he chuckles.
“ Retribution .”
As his answer causes a lump to form in the back of my throat, I don’t feel an ounce of relief when he moves his hand away from the door, allowing me to leave.
There’s no way of escape, I’m sure of it. Thanks to this man, I’m thoroughly trapped until further notice. If I have to guess, until I die.
Down deep, I have a feeling I’m going to meet my fate sooner rather than later if Tommy has anything to do with it.