Chapter 16 #3
Boone shrugged. “We were a mismatch in terms of personalities. Realized we were better friends than lovers. She’s married to one of my good friends now, Erik, and I see them from time to time.
” Boone grinned, recalling something he’d forgot.
“Actually, the last time I ran into them, she elbowed her husband and joked that it would be nice if he tried to be a little more like me. Apparently, he’d forgotten her birthday.
Don’t get me wrong. Erik’s a great guy, but he’s a bit of a workaholic, and he walks around with his phone in his hand like it’s an extra appendage.
Hard to get his attention and hold on to it sometimes. ”
“So Lena was the only one who felt smothered?”
Boone hadn’t put that together, but then again, he’d never considered those earlier relationship serious enough to attach the word forever to them. “Yeah. I guess so.”
“I have to ask, Boone. Did you and Lena ever get along?”
Mila was asking the hard questions. Not that he minded, because she was viewing things from a different perspective and helping him to see that relationship in a new light.
When Lena first walked out, placing all the blame on him, Boone was running on fumes, working all day, then coming home to take care for Sadie.
Hell, he’d been doing that before she left, because the first thing Lena did when he got home from work was hand him the baby, claiming she needed a break after “babysitting” all day.
He used to hate the way she referred to raising their child as babysitting.
When she hit him with that smothering line, he was tired enough—and frustrated enough—to believe it.
“The sex was good,” he replied, only half joking.
Mila snorted. “Do you and Lena get along now?”
Boone sighed. “I try to keep things civil.”
“I feel like there’s a ‘but’ coming.”
He chuckled. “But she makes it hard. It’s like you said, Lena and I are very different people, something that didn’t become glaringly obvious until we were married with a baby on the way.
As I said, I’m rigid,” he added, casting her a sideways glance, grateful when she shook her head and rolled her eyes, disagreeing with him, even if he was right.
“I’m set in my ways, Mila, I told you that.
I like order and routine, so when I tried to encourage Lena to come up with a daily routine for Sadie—feedings and naptimes—I thought it would make things easier for her. ”
“It didn’t?”
He shook his head. “She resented it. Told me I was trying to control her. Lena is chaos personified, always late, never prepared for anything. She used to laugh at me for making a grocery list. When she shopped, she grabbed whatever struck her fancy, which left us with a bunch of random crap that couldn’t be combined into meals. ”
“Yikes.” Mila raised her hand. “I must be rigid, too, because I would never shop without a grocery list.”
“If it had just been her and me, we would have gone our separate ways and that would have been it, but we had Sadie. And I know Lena loves Sadie.”
“Uh-oh. That’s another one of those ‘but’ statements,” she teased, taking a sip of wine.
“But our parenting styles are very different. When Sadie’s with her mom, rules fly out the window.
It makes things difficult for me when Sadie comes back home and suddenly there’s a bedtime, iPad and TV limits, and the expectation that she’ll brush her damn teeth.
” Boone ran a hand through his hair. “This is why I don’t like to talk about Lena. I sound like a bitter asshole.”
She shook her head. “No, you don’t. You sound like a responsible, caring dad. Sadie doesn’t know how much Lena bugs you, does she?”
“I would never let my emotions cloud the way she feels about her mom.”
Mila grasped his forearm. “And that’s why you’re such a good dad.”
“Thanks for saying that.” It wasn’t the first time she’d said it, but as she was the first—only—person to ever say that to him, it meant a lot.
“You said you haven’t dated since Lena because of Sadie. Is that the only reason?”
Boone shrugged. “No, not really. Although she’s the main one.
In first grade, Sadie grew close to one of Lena’s boyfriends, Bobby.
He was a nice guy and obviously in love with Lena.
He went the extra mile with Sadie whenever Lena had her for the weekend, buying her stuffed animals, treating her to ice cream, stuff like that.
When she was seven, Bobby proposed to Lena, and she turned him down.
Obviously, he stopped coming around, and Sadie cried.
She couldn’t understand why Bobby didn’t want to do stuff with her anymore.
I knew that if I brought a woman into our lives, it wasn’t just me who had the potential to get hurt, but Sadie as well. ”
“That makes sense.”
“What you’re not saying is that it makes sense to a degree,” he added, when it was clear she had more to say on the subject.
“By using Sadie as an excuse, you never ran the risk of getting hurt again. I mean, it was noble, but…”
Boone grimaced. “Cowardly. And you’re right. I guess between that and the fact I was letting Lena live rent-free in my head—”
“How so?”
“I let Lena convince me I wasn’t good husband material.
Our marriage was rocky almost from the start.
Lots of fighting. The more I tried to fix the relationship, the more she resented me for it.
When she said I was smothering her, I guess I looked back on all the things I’d done—making the baby schedule, writing the grocery lists, setting a time each week to clean the house together—I assumed she was right.
She told me I was a controlling bastard, and I believed her.
So, I set the idea of dating and marriage aside, convinced I wasn’t cut out for it. ”
“Lena thinks you’ve never dated because you’re still in love with her.”
Boone couldn’t help it. He laughed hard and loud—because what the fuck? “You’re joking,” he managed to say, once he caught his breath.
Mila shook her head.
Suddenly, a light went on, and Boone’s humor faded, his temper piqued. “What did Lena say to you earlier?”
“She asked me to step aside to give her time to win you back, because Sadie was at an age where she needed her mother and her father.”
“So twelve is the age when a girl needs her mom? Not before?” he snapped. Then something else clicked. “Is that why you didn’t come to the cabin tonight? Were you stepping aside?”
“Good God, no! I’ll be honest, I debated with myself all afternoon about whether to stick to tonight’s cooking lesson. In the end, I didn’t want to ruin Sadie’s visit with her mom, since…I wasn’t sure how Lena would react if I showed up.”
“Why does Lena even think there’s something between us? We haven’t said anything to Sadie.”
Mila shrugged. “I’m not sure she does know for certain. I get the impression Sadie’s mentioned me to her mom a lot. Lena knows I taught Sadie how to crochet and about the cooking lessons. She insinuated I was only befriending Sadie as a way of getting close to you.”
“She said that?!” he asked hotly, considering revoking tonight’s sleepover.
Mila raised her hand, attempting to calm him down. “It’s okay, Boone. Water off a duck’s back.”
Her words did not help. “Mila, I don’t want her treating you like that.”
She scooted her chair close to his, and he was grateful for it. He hated any distance between them. Reaching down, he pulled her even closer, until her legs were tucked between his outstretched thighs, dinner forgotten.
“I assume Lena’s with Sadie now,” Mila said.
“Yeah. Guess I understand why Lena hit the grocery store now, determined the three of us were going to cook together tonight, playing happy fucking family.”
Mila’s eyes widened. “Wow. She’s really committed to this idea of hers.”
“What she’s committed to is Lena. I figure two things are at play here, and neither of them have a damn thing to do with getting me back.
One, you’re the first woman Sadie’s ever mentioned to Lena, and I suspect there’s some competitiveness and maybe even jealousy at play.
Two, Lena’s been the ‘dumper’ in all her relationships, never the ‘dumpee.’ And she always had the next man lined up and in place.
But Adam, the guy in Florida? He kicked her out, which means she’s stuck with nowhere to go now.
Apparently, she saw two choices—here or her sister’s. ”
“She really thought you’d let her move in?”
Boone understood why Mila was flabbergasted.
“As I explained, I’ve been civil for Sadie’s sake.
Looks like I was a little too civil, because I obviously fooled Lena.
I told her she could stay tonight, but if she’s serious about staying in Gracemont for Sadie, she’ll have to get a room at the hotel outside Henley Falls. ”
“I’m guessing she didn’t take that well,” Mila mused.
“It went over like a ton of bricks. I think she expected Sadie to take up the battle and wear me down, but…” Boone smiled as he recalled Sadie backing down quickly. “She didn’t.”
“That’s…interesting.”
Boone agreed. “So, my reasons for coming here tonight were twofold. One, I wanted to see why you hadn’t shown up at the cabin—I was worried.”
Mila squeezed his knee, pleased by his admission.
“And to see if there’s a vacant cabin I could crash in tonight.”
Mila ran her finger over her lower lip, the action pure seduction. “There is. Or…I don’t expect Nora or Remi to come home tonight. They took sleeping bags with them, planning to sleep in the stable with the new kittens once they arrive. You could always stay here.”
Boone liked that idea. A lot. “What would we say if they did come home?” He was ready to pull back the curtain on this secret romance, but if Mila didn’t feel the same, he’d wait. Hell, he’d wait until the end of time.
“They already know about us,” she admitted, surprising him.
“Since when?”
“Since last Tuesday, but I only found out today, when they dragged me to Nora’s office and confronted me.” Mila’s cheeks pinkened. “Apparently when I got home last week, my shirt was on inside out.”
Boone barked out a loud laugh. “Well, I guess that would do it.”
“You’re not mad?”
He shook his head. “Not at all.”
“Good. Because I ran into Theo after my Lena encounter, and he confessed the whole family knows.”
Boone ran his fingers through her hair. “I suppose we haven’t exactly been subtle about it. Mav constantly gives me shit about my sudden excitement surrounding the lunch hour. He hasn’t come out and said anything directly, but whenever noon arrives, he tells me to “say hi to Mila.”
She giggled, then quickly sought to reassure him. “They know we’re keeping it quiet because of Sadie. They won’t say anything.”
Boone nodded. He appreciated their discretion, though it was obvious the time had arrived to come clean with his daughter.
“Mila,” he said.
“Hmm,” she hummed.
“Let’s finish dinner, and then I want you to show me your bedroom.”
Boone laughed when Mila picked up her spoon and started shoveling the soup in like it was her job.
“Slow down, darlin’. We’ve got the whole night alone and a bed to spend it in. I’m going to make sure we take advantage. Now…tell me about the rest of your day.”