5. Chapter 2
Sloan
I’m finally getting to the point where I can workout again. I am officially cleared by the doctor to start on cardio and stability training.
I’m starting off with some unweighted squats and footwork, but it’s nothing compared to the training I used to do, and it’s hard not to get frustrated. I lay back down on the mat to do some bicycle crunches after my leg gets tired, and I sigh.
This shouldn’t be this hard, I lie to myself, but the sound of my phone cuts my internal browbeating short, vibrating next to me. I let my head fall against the mat when I see who it’s from.
Tanner: I met with Ronnie today. I pulled some strings, and Bay Productions is going to help you get a podcast off the ground. They’re calling it Boss Kicker Chronicles. You can put your degree to good use. You always have had a face for the big screen.
I want to punch him in the fucking teeth.
The Moonshines ended my contract a month ago, and I stupidly added a clause in it the night we earned a spot in playoffs stating that Tanner would run all my media related affairs, and should something cause my contract with the team to terminate, all control would transfer to him as my manager.
Didn’t think that one through back when I thought he was the man I’d marry.
I shoot him back a thumbs up emoji—it’s better than the middle finger I want to send, but he doesn’t take kindly to it.
Tanner: Don’t be childish. You need this opportunity.
“Fuck right off!” I scream into the void.
This piece of shit really believes if he helps me secure a job, it will erase all the infidelity surrounding him.
He got the house. I didn’t want it. I got to keep my shiny red 1965 vintage convertible Mustang my dad gave me. It was like a divorce. We both took what we came into the relationship with and split everything else 50/50.
Now, he sleeps in my bed with her, and I have a brand-new beachfront, single level condo three blocks from the sports complex here in Mango Bay.
Another text comes in before I respond.
Tanner: You start in two days. I had them transfer you an allowance for clothes. Make sure you turn heads, Sloan.
I roll my eyes, the sting of realization creeping in. How did I ever look past the fact that he’s a douchebag? He didn’t start that way. I guess that’s what happens when you are a washed up college athlete dating the only female kicker in the NFL. You become a douchebag.
I guess that’s what grief does to you. Makes you blinded by a need for connection.
Tanner and I met a month after my dad died.
Having him made losing my dad less lonely.
Being truly alone while healing from a career ending injury has been hard, but the one thing keeping me positive is handling this the way Daddy would have expected.
With grit and a sound mind. “You can’t change reality.
You can only change your reaction to it.
The more sorry you feel for yourself, the more there is to feel sorry for.
You don’t have to like it, but you do have to move forward.
Might as well start today.” Daddy’s advice was the same anytime something bad happened.
Now it’s all I have, so I live by it. But dealing with a shitty situation doesn’t mean letting an asshole run over me.
Me: Sounds good.
I’m not going to bother with pleasantries. I hate my past self for choosing this fate. I open my bank account and note the hefty deposit. Time for a whole new look.
There are only a few boutiques in Mango Bay, so I decide to drive an hour away to the next big town. When I pull into the shopping district, I don’t know where to start. I feel like Vivianne from Pretty Woman, minus the sex worker part.
The first store I walk into is full of upscale pants suits and dresses.
I don’t want to look like I’m on the evening news.
I always wear jeans or shorts with tank tops. Or training gear. I want a change that’s still me. I lean into a classic look, chic—sexy.
I look through the racks and decide to buy a few sheer blouses from the first store.
As the day goes on, I fill my bags with the sexiest things I have ever owned.
Form fitting black dresses that are casual and can be worn with sandals, a few one piece body suits—like leggings only better.
I grab a few off the shoulder sweaters and cardigans I can wear over them on cooler days.
I’ve never liked heels, but my legs look amazing in them, so I grabbed one pair to keep on hand for days I have important meetings.
I saw a picture of Tanner’s new girlfriend, and she’s cute, but according to a few of my old teammates, she’s the Kirkland version of me. They’re not wrong, so I breathe easy knowing it won’t be hard to show her up.
I look back at the text thread with a few of the guys from a few days ago and can’t help but laugh.
Johny: Sloan, tell me you’re not hard up over that douche!
Me: Trying not to be.
Alan: Have you seen her? He posted a picture of them together.
I cringe at the picture he sent of her all bright eyed on Tanner’s arm. As handsome as he is, she’s pretty average.
Jet: Kirkland Sloan
A million laughing emojis and words of agreement followed his text.
I chuckle, close the texts, and continue on my mission. The brace on my knee only slows me down a little as I walk from store to store, and it gives me a new level of confidence. Maybe I should look for one more pair of heels. I can wear it when the brace comes off in a few months.
My phone pings with an email from Bay Productions, so I decide this is the perfect time to take a break, grab a coffee, and sit and look through the information they sent over.
Hi Sloan,
My name is Ali. I’m the junior production manager at Bay Productions. Most of the time Tanner will be your primary contact, but I wanted to introduce myself since I’ll also be producing Boss Kicker Chronicles.
I am so sorry you had to take an early retirement from the NFL, but I am so excited to have you on the team.
I have some exciting things planned for you this first month before Tanner takes the lead.
On Monday, you and I have a meeting with Horner Banks, the owner of the Moonshots.
Mango Ball is so much fun! It’s baseball, but louder, flashier, with viral dances and fan zones instead of old traditions.
We will be covering the next few games. Your first exclusive will be with Oscar Rodriguez.
He will be giving fans a tour of the facility and then you will interview him the next day during the game.
There are a few other players you will also have exclusives with, but Horner thought Oscar would be the best one to get you on the map.
Not that you need it, the second we started promoting your upcoming show, people started following the channel like crazy.
There are already a few million subscribers to your channel just after the initial announcement.
Fans are eager to explore this next phase of your life with you.
To help us corner the market in Mango Ball, we will branch out to other sports for a few episodes, but I wanted to give you some time before launching into football.
See you soon,
Ali Reynolds
Junior Production Manager
Bay Productions
Wonder what I have to do to get Ali to take over Boss Kicker completely.
She seems nice, excited, and most importantly, professional.
The opposite of Tanner. Maybe if I talk her up enough, Tanner will trust her and also see it as an opportunity to avoid the frequent awkward exchanges we are destined to have.
I sip my coffee and shift my focus to planning for the upcoming show. I lose myself in questions I could ask to get Oscar talking in our interview. He’s pretty quiet from what I’ve seen and sometimes comes off cold.
Just as I put my pen to paper in the notebook I bought today, my phone rings. When Tanner’s face lights up my screen, I want to chuck it through the window behind me.
“Yeah,” I answer, but he doesn’t respond. His voice sounds far away, like the phone is sitting somewhere close by him but not quite next to him.
He’s always calling people from his watch and doesn’t realize it.
“She’s a means to an end.” His voice is faint but clear. I shouldn’t listen, but I do. This fucker has cost me enough heartache, and I’d love to know what he’s talking about.
Another voice chimes in, and I realize—it’s her.
“She’s your ex, what end does she serve?” Her voice gets clearer as she talks, like he’s hugging her, and my stomach turns.
“She’s the biggest name in the NFL right now, and if I play this right, her podcast can launch my career.”
“What if you catch feelings for her again?” Her voice cracks.
“I won’t. I know what I gave up. I know what I have.” The sound muffles like she’s moving into his arms.
What the fuck?
Hearing all I want to, I hang up the phone. Instead of pain, I’m downright pissed. He’s using me. I have to make this a nightmare for him.
Either he goes down or I do, and I refuse to be a pawn in his little game.
I hang up the phone and shift my focus once more. This time instead of notes for the interview, I type up an email to my new lawyer. Stupid doesn’t even explain my choice to trust Tanner’s lawyer when I signed the contract. I never even thought to have another lawyer read it over.