Twenty-Nine
Holden
The last thing I expected from the townhouse meeting I called was the tables being turned on me and my fuck ups.
After all, the entire reason I called this little meeting in the first place was because Oakley’s been so MIA lately; the only reason we knew he was alive was because Cam let us know he was still showing up at the rink.
Discussing my love life was never meant to be on the table, yet in true Holden Sykes fashion, it seems like that’s exactly what’s happening.
“You in or you out?” Oakley asks, glancing between Theo and Camden.
“No, don’t come in here acting like you give a shit now, Oak. It doesn’t fucking work that way,” I say before sinking back into the couch.
Oakley gives me an apologetic look, his eyes softening around the edges. “Except I do care, and I’m sorry I made you feel like I didn’t.”
I can tell he means it from his expression alone.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m still irritated as hell that he hasn’t been around, but I need to talk to him.
For him to help me get my head on straight with all the secrets and the feelings I don’t know what to do with.
Otherwise, I’m liable to screw this all up more than I already have, especially with the way I found Phoenix last night when I snuck into his room.
I shake my head, unable to help the hint of a smile forming at the corner of my lips. “Fucking dick.”
“Aw, look at that. Mom and Dad made up,” Camden says with a laugh.
Theo’s attention flicks between me and Oakley. “Which one of them is Mom?”
I open my mouth to rebut—Oakley’s obviously the mom—except he takes the opportunity to steer us back to the subject at hand.
“So what happened?” he asks, brow arched.
The smile working its way onto my face falls, the question sobering me instantly. “Like I said, I fucked up. All there really is to it.”
“But how?”
“Does this have anything to do with what’s going on with Phoenix and Kason? Because those two are thick as thieves, and they haven’t spoken in weeks,” Theo muses, eyes locked on me.
If looks could kill.
He knows damn well this is about them. He might not have all the details, but he’s far more aware than he lets on.
I’d bet anything he’s already pieced this together a while ago and just hasn’t said anything.
Then again, I’m sure Theo sharing the basement floor with me only leaves so much to the imagination.
The only thing he doesn’t know is that through my original pursuit of Kason…I ended up falling in love with Phoenix instead.
The thought causes my head to drop to my hands, shoulders slumping in defeat before repeating myself. “Like I said. I. Fucked. Up.”
“Well, now I’m intrigued,” Cam says, shifting on the couch beside me. “Theo, go grab the popcorn. We might be here a while.”
I hear Theo rise from the couch, his footfalls retreating away and—
Is he actually getting fucking popcorn right now?
Fuck, I’m ready to abort this mission. The messed-up status of my love life really isn’t what I want tonight’s entertainment to be. No matter how much I could use even one good piece of advice.
“Guys, seriously,” I tell them. “It’s a saga, and not a good one.”
“But Theo’s already getting the popcorn,” Cam counters. “And besides, I’ve got some time to kill, so might as well get it off your chest.”
I shift, my back hitting the leather as I stare up at the ceiling. “How much time you got?”
“However much time it takes,” Oakley murmurs.
I glance over to him and give him a playful shove. “You sure you don’t need to go hang out with your other friends?” But what is meant to be teasing quickly becomes me realizing I just shoved the shoulder Oakley hurt in his game earlier tonight.
My eyes widen, about to start apologizing profusely when he starts laughing. Sure, it’s laced with a bit of pain, but it’s laughter, regardless.
“Now you’re lucky if I’ll listen at all.”
I roll my eyes, because clearly, he’s fine if he’s gonna start getting snippy with me while I’m ready to have a full-blown meltdown.
“So fucking dramatic tonight. You’re definitely the Mom,” I gripe before turning and calling over the couch. “Theo! Bring an ice pack while you’re at it!”
Barely two seconds later, he’s tossing one of our many communal ice packs at Oakley. Probably not the smartest move to make while he has a shoulder injury, though somehow, he manages to catch it and settle in on the couch.
Theo vaults into place over the back of the couch not long after with a giant bowl of popcorn in hand that he sets on the table. “Snacks have been taken care of, so now you can tell us exactly how you fucked up.”
I blink at him, having no idea why he or Cam has any desire to be part of this. But while I’m not gonna hold my breath, I might as well spill my guts and pray—by some miracle of God—they have some insight for me.
Otherwise, it’s all on Oakley’s one good shoulder.
Blowing out a breath, I mutter the single sentence that started this entire mess.
“I slept with Phoenix.”
The entire room is so silent you could hear a pin drop. Even their munching on popcorn halts as they let this bomb sink in.
“Okay, well, I already—”
“Yeah, I know,” I snap at Theo, cutting him off. “We don’t need to rehash all the shit you’re aware of that you don’t need to be.”
“So he’s the one with the handcuffs, huh?” he says with a laugh before popping another kernel in his mouth. “Didn’t see that coming.”
“Wait, back up for me here. We’re still talking about Kason’s best friend, Phoenix?” Oakley asks, which I confirm with a solemn nod.
Camden’s brow furrows, and he glances over at Theo. “And also your teammate, Phoenix?”
“Yeah,” I answer for Theo, eyes still locked on Camden. “We’ve been seeing each other in secret since coming back from Florida.”
Cam’s silent for a moment before responding with, “Well, I don’t get what the big deal is.”
“Were you not listening to the part where Phoenix is Kason’s best friend?” Theo chides. He reaches into the bowl of popcorn and tosses a few pieces at Camden’s face. “Pay closer attention.”
Cam falters for a second, clearly trying to process, before nodding. “So you were seeing Kason, only to end things so you could pursue Phoenix?” It comes out more like a question than a statement.
“Yes, but no.” I lean forward, elbows on my knees, and drop my head to my hands.
“There’s a bit more to it. As it turns out, Phoenix and I hooked up at a party back in May, which was well before I ever knew about Kason’s sexuality.
I just…” The words catch in my throat, guilt clogging them there.
“I don’t remember anything with Phoenix happening. ”
“Fucking hell, Hold,” Oakley mutters, and I glance up to find him shaking his head.
If I didn’t know how much these guys care about me, I’d really be questioning if I’m completely alone in this pile of shit I’ve landed in. Which is fucking massive.
“Wait a minute,” Theo says, and when I glance over, he’s studying my face intently. “You don’t remember it at all? Like…none of it?”
I shake my head and rake my fingers through my hair. “I remember nothing between Oakley leaving to go home and waking up naked and alone the next morning in some random bed in the Kappa Sig house.”
“Sounds like a typical weekend,” Cam chimes in, and I glare at him.
“Funny, seeing as you rival me in notches on your bedpost.”
“Cool it. Both of you,” Theo says, his gaze snapping between the two of us before landing on me. “So if you don’t remember, how did you find out?”
I stare at him. “You’re the one who told me.”
His eyebrows might as well hit the ceiling. “When did I—”
“At a gas pump somewhere near the Illinois and Kentucky border.”
From the look on his face, the lightbulb has just flicked on. “Oh, shit.”
“This is getting good,” Cam says as he reaches back into the bowl of popcorn for another handful.
“I know,” Oakley muses, and I don’t miss the smirk on his lips as he pops a kernel in his mouth. “Good thing Theo got snacks.”
I roll my eyes, ignoring the two assholes sitting here, and ask, “So you wanna tell me how you knew, but I didn’t?”
“You mean apart from you being obliterated?” he asks with a scoff. “It’s because I saw you, jackass. I was the one he was talking to before you so rudely interrupted, all so you could slam him against the wall and make out with him.”
“Damn,” Oakley mutters under his breath. “That’s ballsy, even for you, Hold.”
Uh, yeah. I’d say so.
My attention shifts back to Theo. “Then why didn’t you say anything the next morning?”
Theo shifts in his seat, and for the first time all night, he looks a little uncomfortable.
“I didn’t know you blacked out. None of us did.” Theo glances over at Cam and Oakley, both of whom have sobering expressions on their faces. “And to be honest, man…if you wanted to forget that night, we weren’t about to make you remember it.”
I should be grateful for friends and roommates who’d look out for me.
Who’d let me chase my demons away in peace and without judgment.
It’s the kind of friendship I never thought I’d find coming to college.
But if I’d have known this information six months ago, who knows where this fucked-up situation between Kason, Phoenix, and I would be.
And that makes it really hard to feel anything except frustration.
Oakley lets out a low whistle as he settles back in his seat, wincing when his shoulder injury twinges slightly. “Well, this certainly explains the cock-blocking you received earlier this year.”
“Thanks, Captain Obvious,” I retort, but the snark doesn’t quite hit the way it’s meant to.
“Okay, so don’t kill me, but I still don’t see the problem here,” Cam says slowly.
My hands rake through my hair. “The problem is Phoenix doesn’t want Kason to find out.”
“And you do?” Theo asks.
I nod. “I’ve wanted to since the beginning, but I agreed to the rules Phoenix laid down for me, so it feels like my hands are tied.”
Camden frowns. “So why wouldn’t you just tell Kason yourself? Like a double secret?”