Chapter 17
JADE
After he touched me, made me feel pieces of the girl I was, he held me in his arms for what felt like hours. The women next door long forgotten, sent home by his men, the ones he instructed to get them out of his home.
I’ve never been held by a man before. Not really. The one boyfriend I had when I was eighteen was just a boy. We didn’t last more than a few months, and the one after him was more of the same. They were nice guys, but no one I really remembered or longed for.
Not like Enzo. He’s carved out a piece of me. Owning it. Consuming it. As though it’s been his all along. As though I’ve been his forever.
With him, I’m weightless, lost in a world I didn’t know I could have.
But he makes me want it. The normalcy. A life—with him, with Robby.
And maybe he can protect us. Maybe I was wrong about it all.
He’s done so much for me already. Maybe I could trust him with my secrets.
If anyone could help me, Enzo may be the one to do it.
But I need time to be sure this is the right move. If Robby is still alive, then I have to be absolutely positive that telling Enzo won’t harm my son.
Enzo rustles beside me, his large arm draped over my hip, pulling me closer as he groans. His mouth lands on my shoulder so softly, it doesn’t belong to a man as hard as him. Yet, that’s who he’s always been with me, hasn’t he? A myriad of faces, an angel, and the devil too.
He fell asleep beside me all night, not wanting to go, and I didn’t want him to go either. He makes all the ugly fade away, finding the beauty I once possessed and bringing it out onto the surface.
I could love him. Really love him. The thought hurts, my heart heavy, bleeding for the music we could create. But can it really be our song? Can we sing the words out loud, or are we destined to beat to a melody that never quite fit?
After he brought us food last night, we ate in bed, laughing like long-lost friends, lovers awakened to the colors flooding from a world that was once so dark, so lonely. Until now. Until he came into my life and changed everything. For better or worse. I don’t yet know. I’m too afraid to find out.
Fear, that’s what I’ve known these past nine years. My only real friend or enemy. They’re one and the same. In my world, people are hard to trust.
But I trust him.
Don’t I?
“Good morning, baby,” he says, the gravelly rasp of his voice seeps with male power, wrapping me in its safety, something foreign, yet something I crave badly.
“Morning.” I turn toward him, an adoring smile spreading wide across his face.
“I hope you slept well, because I sure as hell did.” He squeezes the hand on my hip, kissing the tip of my nose.
My heart lurches.
“Never better.” I grin, meaning it. Sleeping while my enemies watched my every move, entering my home uninvited, isn’t what I’d call quality sleep.
“Good. Maybe we can make this permanent.” His palm cruises around to my ass, massaging it as he kisses my neck.
My nipples pebble in the wake of his touch, my moans beating with a hum, my fingers lacing in his hair. Waking up beside him every day, I don’t know if I’m ready for that. I’m already falling deep for this man, without knowing a thing about him.
“I need more time,” I whisper, and his lips still, his breath warmly drifting over my neck. He draws back, those eyes trapping me in the evergreen forest, into a maze full of temptation.
“I’m not the enemy, baby.”
“I know that. But…” I trail off, not wanting to reveal more than I’m ready to.
His hand fastens around the back of my neck, his gaze softening. “It’s okay. Don’t need to explain.”
“I feel like I do.” Emotions grip the back of my throat. “I feel like I need to tell you everything, but there are things holding me back.”
“You tell me when you’re ready because I’m not going anywhere.” A crooked smile lands over his face. “And neither are you, baby girl.”
“Thanks for the constant reminder.” I roll my eyes playfully as he scoots me up and places me on top of him, my cheek against his chest, the hurried beats of his heart pounding underneath me, matching the quickening of my pulse.
“Tell me that being here in my arms isn’t better than wherever you were, and I’ll let you go right now. No questions. But don’t lie to me.”
My breathing hitches, my skin awakening with prickles running down my back.
“I can’t tell you that.”
He lets out a sigh, pushing my body up languidly as his mouth lands to the top of my head, the kiss so beautiful, I burrow further into his chest, not sure when the nightmare turned into a dream.
But Robby, he’s still out there, and I still need to find him.