Chapter 1
I never met my mom. I wonder if she’s pretty. If I look like her. Daddy says she died a long time ago, right after I was born. He says it’s my fault she died. That I did it to her when I came out of her.
I hate myself for killing Mommy. I wish I could see her, even a picture. But we don’t have any. I want to have a mom like my cousins Chiara and Raquel do. They’re so lucky.
I only have my dad. He isn’t nice to me. I think he hates me for hurting Mommy. I don’t blame him.
I play with the doll Uncle Sal got me for my birthday. There’s no one here but me and Ms. Greco. She teaches me stuff because Daddy won’t let me go to a real school. He says it’s better if I stay home. I don’t know why. I just want to be like my cousins. They get to go to school.
I’m always here alone in our big house. He just goes and leaves me for most of the day. Ms. Greco sleeps over when he can’t be home at night. She tucks me in. She’s always nice to me.
She says I’m smart, that I read very well, but math is kinda hard. She buys me lots of books too. I like to read them when I’m not playing.
I want to see my cousins, have some friends, but Daddy won’t let me. He gets mad when I ask too many questions. I only see Chiara and Raquel for holidays or birthdays. All the other times, I stay in our house. At least I have a backyard. I can go on the swing or play in my sandbox.
“Aida, honey,” Ms. Greco calls from the kitchen. “I made some chocolate chip cookies. Would you like one?”
“Yummy!” I instantly jump to my feet, dropping the doll and running toward her. “Could I have two?” I rush into the kitchen, but she already has two on a plate, waiting for me.
I grin wide, grabbing one, and stuff it into my mouth. It’s all warm and gooey. “Thank you,” I mumble, crumbs falling out of my mouth.
“Welcome. You deserve it after all the hard work you did with your studies.” She takes a cookie, placing it on her own plate, looking sweetly at me as she eats.
I wish she was my mom. Was my real mom as nice as her? Did she have blonde hair like me or black hair like Ms. Greco? I’ll never know and it makes me so sad.
“What’s wrong, honey?” Ms. Greco asks, and I look up at her, not sure what I should say. She works for my dad. What if she tells him? What if he gets mad at me for thinking about Mom, then yells or hits me?
“Nothing. I’m just tired.” I start on the second cookie. “Will Daddy be mad that you made these?”
“No, don’t worry.” Her smile is pretty. It makes me happy. “He said it was fine when I asked yesterday.”
“Good. I don’t like it when he yells.”
She sighs. “Me neither, honey.”
“Will you stay tonight?”
She gets up, coming over to me, hugging around my shoulders from behind. “Not tonight.”
“Oh.” I can’t look at her. I’ll start crying. But she can tell I’m sad because she hugs me tighter.
“I’m sorry, Aida. I wish…” She takes a heavy breath.
I whirl my head up and it looks like she wants to cry. “You wish what?”
“I wish,” she whispers, bending to my ear, “that I could take you away from here. You deserve more. I’m sorry I don’t do enough.”
“Don’t cry.” I quickly turn and put my arms around her stomach and hug her with all my might. “You do help me. You’re nice to me. You teach me. You’re my friend.”
“Yeah, sweetheart, I am.”
I hold on to her for a few moments longer until we have to get up and clean the kitchen together. If the house isn’t spotless, my dad gets super mad at us.
“You can go play now, sweetie,” she says once we’re done. “Later, we can read some books together before watching a movie.”
“That will be so fun! See, you do help me,” I tell her with a big grin. But she still looks sad, even though she’s kind of smiling.
We both walk back out into the living room. As soon as Ms. Greco sits and I plop on the floor to join my doll, the front door flies open, my dad, my uncles, and other men I’ve never seen before come rushing in, carrying someone.
Ms. Greco jumps to a stand. “What the…” Her eyes look like they’re going to explode. “Who is that?”
“Shut up!” my father barks at her, and she instantly sits back down. A man with glasses walks in, carrying a long bed type thing. I don’t know what it’s called, but he puts it on the floor.
My uncle Sal is holding someone in his arms, but all I see are the person’s feet from the floor.
Small feet. White sneakers.
I’m afraid to look, but I get up anyway. I want to see who it is.
Slowly, I tiptoe, scared my father will see me. Once my uncle drops the person on the bed, I gasp.
It’s a boy. He’s little like me. Why are his eyes closed?
I go to get a better look, hoping my footsteps don’t make any noise. My heart is beating so fast, but I want to see what’s wrong with him. I hope he isn’t hurt or…dead.
I go even closer as the man with the glasses takes out a black bag with a bunch of doctor stuff, like a stethoscope, which he throws on the floor.
Is that who he is? A doctor? Oh, good. He’s going to help the boy.
He puts his hand on the boy’s neck. “He’s still alive, but barely,” the doctor man says, removing a blanket from on top of him.
“Oh no!” I yelp when I notice the blood on his shirt around his belly. I instantly cover my mouth because, in that instant, my dad’s angry eyes are on me.
He caught me.
“Get the fuck out of here, Aida.” He pushes my chest and I stumble, my eyes burning, my bottom lip trembling as I start to cry.
Why does he have to be so mean?
“Who is that, Daddy?” I whimper it so low, hoping he doesn’t hurt me again. But I want to know. I want to help that boy. He shouldn’t be here. Not in this evil house. Not with my dad.
“Are you deaf?” he yells. “Didn’t I tell you to leave?”
“Come on, Aida,” Ms. Greco faintly says, her hand reaching for me as she rises from the couch.
I glance at her once my dad stops focusing on me, shaking my head as I move back a step, huddling behind the sofa.
I can’t leave the boy. He needs me. He needs someone who’s worried about him to stay. I’m sure my daddy doesn’t care. He doesn’t like anyone.
“You better bring that kid back to life, doc,” my uncle Faro warns, and the man looks terrified. He should be. Uncle Faro is mean like Daddy.
“I’m going to do what I can.”
“No.” He presses his teeth together and grabs a fistful of the man’s shirt, pushing his face into him. “You’ll do what I asked. If he dies, you die. And so will that pretty wife of yours, after I test drive her out for myself.”
The man nods quickly, and it’s like at any moment he’ll burst into tears. “Whatever you say, Faro. Just don’t hurt her.”
“That’ll be up to you. Now work.” Uncle Faro drops his hand away. At least my uncle is trying to help this little boy, then maybe he can go home to his family.
The scared man fumbles with his stuff while he takes out some sharp metal things and something in a bottle. He pours the water out into a bowl. I think he’s cleaning everything.
The doctor uses scissors to cut open the boy’s shirt and throws it on the floor as he puts one of the pointy tools to the boy’s stomach. I can’t see what he’s doing exactly, but he looks like he knows what to do, even with all the people around him.
I stop paying attention to them, staring at the boy’s face. From here, I can see him clearly. He has such long eyelashes, even longer than mine, and his hair is brown.
Please be okay. I’m sure your mom and dad want you to be okay. Why aren’t they with you?
“Aida,” Ms. Greco whispers from her seat. “We should leave before your dad gets even madder.”
“Shh! I can’t leave until I know he’s okay. He needs me. He has no one.”
“Oh, sweet girl. We can only stay for a few more minutes, then we have to go.”
“A few more minutes, yes.” But I don’t tell her I won’t leave. Not until he’s awake.
“We gonna use him for the club,” Uncle Faro tells my father.
What club? Is it fun?
Daddy laughs. “Yeah, he’d be perfect, a cute kid like that. They’ll eat him up.”
“Why don’t we use him for something else?” Uncle Sal asks this time. “We need men. Killers. We’ve never built one from the ground up. We can have the guys train him. Make him into whatever the hell we want.”
What are they talking about?
“Hmm.” Uncle Faro’s mouth twists to the side as he slowly nods. “You have a good point. But we can’t keep him with the rest in case the law comes snooping. I don’t want that little shit to ever be found.”
“I’ll keep him here,” Dad says with a tight smile. “The basement will be perfect. It hasn’t disappointed me yet. And my kid goes nowhere, so she won’t talk. Neither will that one.” He tilts his head, staring in Ms. Greco’s direction.
The boy will stay with us? For how long? Why? Where’s his family?
Maybe I can keep him company while he gets better. Will he want to be my friend? But I’m not even allowed in the basement. Daddy says that’s his private place.
“It’s done, then,” Uncle Faro says. “Cavaleri is ours. Too bad we can’t bring his daddy back and show him what will become of his youngest.” He smiles meanly.
Even though I want this boy to be my friend, I don’t want him to stay here. This isn’t a nice place. He has to go home. He has to get better.
“Open your eyes,” I whisper quietly, looking straight at him, his face tilted to the side. “Please. You have to get out of here.”
Maybe he can hear me if I think it loud enough. But that’s silly. People can’t hear each other that way.
Can they?
“Shit,” the doctor says.
Suddenly, I gasp.
The boy, his eyes fly open, and they’re staring straight at me.