Chapter 15
FIFTEEN
FLORA
My body is hurting and aching as every cut stings. I had to spend the night lying on my stomach so I didn’t aggravate the wounds.
Dax left early to go to the pharmacy for emergency contraception.
I feel a sense of unease wash over me as I walk out onto the balcony. Lyka stands there, smoking a cigarette and looking out at the forest. I should be angry at him for hurting me, but I’m not. My fucked up mind and body want him even more.
I walk over to him, wanting to speak about yesterday, but before I can, he suddenly turns me around and lifts my T-shirt. I feel his fingers trace the wounds on my back.
Before I can ask why he did that, he twists me back and lifts me on the balcony banister. He takes a final drag of his cigarette and flicks it over the balcony. I grip his shoulders and balance myself on the narrow banister. He holds me in place, making sure I don’t fall back. I don’t know why, but we just stare at each other. He moves his face away from mine and goes to say something, but before he can, I speak up. “Lyka, you never answered my question. Why are you so grumpy with me?”
He looks out into the forest and shrugs. “I don’t like getting close to people.”
Before I can reply, a high-pitched cry rings out. I turn my head and see a bear cub that appears injured.
“It’s hurt!” I shout. Seeing the cub pulls at my heartstrings. I jump down from the banister and rush over to the stairs.
“FLORA, STOP!” Lyka yells, panicked. As I’m about to descend the steps. He grips my arm, sending a shot of pain through it.
I look back at the cub and see what Lyka saw. Out of the bushes steps a massive Mama bear. She sniffs the air and tenderly picks up the cub by the scruff of its neck. The moment they are out of sight, I can hear Lyka deeply exhale. In that moment, I see a different side of Lyka. His grip on my arms loosens as he takes my hand and leads me away from the stairs. We silently watch the Mama bear retreat back into the forest with her cub.
“I didn’t think…Thank you,” I say, my voice shaking.
“You gotta be careful. The forests here can be dangerous, Flora.”
We both look out at the forest, taking in the view in silence. We both don't know what to say to each other.
Lyka breaks the silence. “Come on, let's head inside.”
I follow him back inside the cabin.
Dax enters from the living room as we enter the kitchen. He places a couple of paper bags on the counter and pulls out a box labeled Plan B , pushing it toward me.
I look up at Lyka. His expression is unreadable, but his eyes flick to the box and back to me.
I grab the box, open it, and pull out the instructions. “Okay, I just have to take one pill,” I mumble to myself.
Dax passes me a glass of water and I take the pill out of the box. I put the pill into my mouth and grab the glass of water. Before I take a sip, Lyka’s hand quickly covers the top of the glass, pushing it down to the counter.
I freeze, looking at Lyka with confusion. His eyes are filled with an emotion I can’t figure out.
What are you doing, Lyka?
Dax notices and calls out, “Lyka…”
Lyka turns around hastily, shaking his head as if trying to clear his mind.
I shrug, feeling confused. I lift the glass to my mouth again and take a big gulp, swallowing the pill.
“I can’t believe that pill cost nearly fifty dollars,” Dax grumbles, glaring at Lyka.
“What? That’s pricey…Do you want any money?” I offer.
Dax’s gaze softens when he looks back at me. “No, it's okay, flower. Don’t worry about it.”
“Question. Did you wear a mask when you went into town?” I ask. I didn’t want the risk of catching Covid.
“Of course…Also, I picked you up some new underwear and something else.” I don’t know what the surprise is, but I feel very grateful for the underwear.
Dax reaches into the bag and pulls out a set of watercolors and other supplies. He places them in front of me with a wide smile.
“Wow,” I breathe, opening the watercolor tin and seeing the vibrant colors inside.
“The watercolors in the barn were no good, they were too old. I thought you could get back into painting.”
“Dax, it's been so long.”
“You can do it. I believe in you. I wanna see how beautiful you can paint.”
His words are encouraging as old memories flood my mind. I feel grateful that he wants to see my paintings, but I’m nervous. It’s a part of me that I neglected for too long now .
Lyka gets up from the stool and gives me a soft look as he leaves the room.
I walk onto the balcony wearing one of Dax’s old T-shirts that hangs loosely on my body. I see an easel, a table with paints, brushes, and a jar of water already set up. A speaker plays Fleetwood Mac music.
I take a seat on the wooden stool. I’m nervous as I take a deep breath and pick up a paintbrush. I look at the forest; the breathtaking view is begging to be painted.
My hand hovers over the colors. I go to start with the color black, but I pause and dip the brush into the vibrant green instead.
I feel hope, fear, excitement—all my emotions take over me. The brush glides smoothly across the paper as I begin to paint. I lose myself in my art, each stroke bringing me joy.
Time seems to blur as I am immersed in painting. Being surrounded by natural beauty, two hot brothers, and painting seems therapeutic.
What am I thinking, two hot brothers? I had slept with both of them. I was only a virgin last week. What have I done?
I look over the balcony and see Lyka and Dax chopping wood. They are both topless, a sheen of sweat on their bodies shining in the sun. Their bodies move effortlessly as they swing the ax.
I was tangled in a web—their web. Desire and confusion fill me. I don’t know what I want.
Lyka senses my gaze and he looks up at me, his eyes locked onto m ine. I quickly avert my eyes back to the painting, feeling awkward.
Did I want both of them? Could I have both of them? The lockdown will be over soon and they won’t want me then. They will throw me back into the real world.
I focus back on my painting and try to steady my thoughts.
I admire my painting as I stand back. I have created something beautiful again. The forest in front of me is now on my canvas. The colors stand out and it feels good to look at it.
After leaving the painting outside to dry, I walk into the kitchen. On the counter are brownies and they look too good to resist. I take one and eat it, savoring the rich chocolate flavor.
Fuck, that tastes good!
I grab another and Lyka walks into the kitchen as I eat it. His eyes are wide with shock.
“Fuck. How many have you had, Flora?” he asks.
“Only two. Why?”
Lyka shakes his head. Before he can respond, Dax walks in and bursts out laughing.
“Please don’t tell me they are out of date…” I start.
“They’re weed brownies,” Lyka replies, biting down on his bottom lip.
I accidentally swallow the last bit of brownie in shock. “Fuck. Shit. Fuck. Will I die?”
Panic sets in and I start pacing. I want to make myself sick.
Lyka face palms and Dax just sniggers. “You are not gonna die. However, you’re only meant to eat one. You’re in for a ride,” he explains .
A ride? What? Fuck! I’ve never done drugs!
Without hesitation, Lyka walks over to the plate, picks up two brownies, and eats them. Dax copies him, grabbing a couple and scarfing them down.
“Nothing to worry about. We’ll all be equally high,” Lyka says with a smirk.
Dax still looks amused. “Listen, just go with it. You’ll be fine,” he reassures me.
What he said does very little to ease my worries. I nod, trying to calm myself. “What will I feel? What should I expect?”
“You will feel super chill…Relaxed….You’re safe,” Lyka says.
I take a deep breath and mumble, “Okay…”
Lyka leans on the counter nonchalantly. “It's gonna take a while to kick in. About one to two hours.”
Dax shakes his head in agreement. “Don’t overthink. Just let it happen.” He walks over to the back door and steps out onto the balcony.
I look at Lyka and he just nudges his shoulder with mine, trying to reassure me.
“Fucking hell!” I hear Dax say loudly.
I walk outside on the balcony and see him standing there, admiring my painting.
“Damn. You can paint! This is amazing!” Dax exclaims.
I bite my bottom lip awkwardly and reply, “You think?”
“Yes. It’s beautiful. The colors and details. It’s something, flower.”
I blush, fiddling with my fingers as I bite my cheek. “Thanks...”
My parents come to mind as I look at the painting, standing there and daydreaming.
Lyka approaches from behind, snapping me out of my daydream. His voice is soft as he speaks. “Dax is right. This is incredible, Flora. ”
“I wasn’t sure if I had it in me. It’s been so long since I painted with color…” I admit, but pride washes over me as I look at the painting.
Dax places a hand on my shoulder. “This is a gift. You never lost it. Keep doing it.”
“It’s a powerful gift,” Lyka says as his eyes meet mine. He shows emotion in his eyes for a moment.
We all stand there in silence, admiring my painting. However, my thoughts go back to the weed brownie.
“I’m scared,” I admit.
“Don’t be, you have us. We will never let anything bad happen to you. I promise,” Lyka reassures me.
Never let anything bad happen to me.
His words make me feel weak. I hope he will keep his promise.