Chapter 25
Trill-Land
It had been weeks since Reni called herself takin’ her damn key back from a nigga, and ever since then, I had been movin’ around like nothin’ really fazed me, but I ain’t even gon’ lie… that shit sat with me more than I let the shit show.
At first, I was straight. I kept tellin’ myself it was just another one of them breakups where niggas needed space, time and to cool off before we ended up right back in each other’s face doin’ the same shit all over again.
Me and Reni had been through that shit too many times, and I wasn’t about to keep runnin’ in circles actin’ like somethin’ was gon’ magically change.
And that was the part that kept me from reachin’ for her.
I missed her, no doubt about it. Shid… it would be random times where I’d be sittin’ in my whip or layin’ in my bed, and I would pick my phone up, scroll straight to her name, and just stare at it for a second, really thinkin’ about callin’.
Then I stopped myself, locked my phone and tossed it to the side ’cause I already knew how that shit would go.
We would talk, then argue, then say shit we ain’t mean, then somehow end up right back tangled up like ain’t shit happened… just to break apart again. And I wasn’t built for that shit no more, so instead, I kept myself busy.
My gun shop had been my main focus. I had been movin’ real product, real weight and linkin’ with the right people, makin’ sure shit stayed flowin’ the way it was supposed to.
Me and Blaqson had been out damn near every other night, ridin’ through Trill Land, and stoppin’ through different spots just to keep my energy right.
Some days, I slid through Trill Hills, and hit the barbershop just to sit back in a chair and talk shit.
Niggas would be laughin’, crackin’ jokes, speakin’ on whatever was happenin’ on the island and I would be right there with ’em, clownin’, keepin’ it light and actin’ like everything was cool.
Then I’d leave there and slide to Auntie Rue’s bakery, grab somethin’ to eat and let her fuss at me for not comin’ by more often.
Other nights, me and Blaqson would pop out to events, clubs or wherever the vibe was at.
Music stayed loud, and the lights was always low.
Women was everywhere with drinks flowin’, and my ass would be in the middle of it, dappin’ niggas up, speakin’ when I needed to and mindin’ my business when I didn’t.
And yeah, women approached me. They always did, but I ain’t entertain none of that shit, ’cause I done seen what happened when niggas tried to fill a void with somebody else.
I watched Pressure go through it. I watched Kay’Lo go through it. I watched how shit went left with Kashmere and Echo, and how everything turned into somethin’ deeper than what it started as. Hell, Toni ended up killin’ Echo behind Kay’Lo ass, and that alone was enough for me to stay in my lane.
I wasn’t about to drag nobody into my shit just ’cause I was missin’ Reni, and I damn sure wasn’t about to disrespect what we had by playin’ with somebody else.
So, I kept it simple—Work, money, movement… that was it.
Still… that ain’t stop her from crossin’ my mind.
It would be lil’ shit too, like the way she looked at me when she thought I wasn’t payin’ attention, and the way she’d be on a nigga for no reason at all.
I always caught myself smirkin’ at the memory, then shook it off quick, not tryna go down that road.
’Cause deep down, I felt like I just wasn’t the nigga she needed.
Maybe I wasn’t built the way she needed me to be. Maybe I ain’t have what she was lookin’ for long term, and instead of keepin’ her stuck in somethin’ that kept breakin’, I figured it was better to just… leave the shit alone.
At the same time, it ain’t mean this shit ain’t hurt though. It just meant I knew better than to keep playin’ with it.
Right now, I was at the crib, laid back with Pressure and Kay’Lo, kickin’ it the way we always did when shit was calm. We had the cards out, music playin’ low in the background and I was whoopin’ they ass in spades.
“Man, y’all niggas weak as fuck,” I said, throwin’ my card down while I leaned back in my seat. “I don’t even know why I keep playin’ with y’all like this.”
Kay’Lo shook his head, already reachin’ for his drink. “Nigga, shut up.”
Pressure chuckled low, shakin’ his head like he already knew what it was. “Keep talkin’. I’mma clean you up next hand, nigga.”
“Nigga, I’m cleanin’ you up now. The fuck is you talkin’ ’bout,” I shot back, grinnin’ while I grabbed my cards.
We was in the middle of the game, laughin’, talkin’ shit and just vibin’ like nothin’ else mattered, when Kay’Lo’s phone rang. He glanced at the screen, then picked it up, answerin’ without thinkin’ twice.
The second he put it to his ear, I could hear Toni screamin’ through the phone.
It wasn’t clear enough to make out what she was sayin’, but the shit was loud enough to know somethin’ wasn’t right.
Me and Pressure both paused at the same time, our attention shiftin’ straight to Kay’Lo. The energy in the room changed so fast, and I watched ‘Lo’s face while he listened.
It was like everything drained out of him all at once, like whatever he was hearin’ just hit him somewhere deep. His hand slid down his face slow while he sat still listenin’, still tryna process whatever Toni was sayin’.
And the first thing that crossed my mind was My’Love.
My chest tightened instantly, a feelin’ hittin’ me so quick I ain’t even have time to think straight. I wasn’t ready for nothin’ to happen to her. I wasn’t ready for no bad news when it came to her, and I could feel that shit sittin’ tearin’ up my chest while I waited.
“What the fuck!?” Kay’Lo shouted, his voice sharp enough to cut through everything. “Is you serious right now!?”
Me and Pressure looked at each other for a second, both of us tryna read the situation without even askin’ yet.
Kay’Lo stayed quiet for a second after that, still listenin’, and breathin’ heavy while he ran his hand over his face again.
Then he finally pulled the phone away from his ear and looked at us.
“Fuck, bruh…” he said, his voice lower now, but that weight was still there.
“Sha’Nelle got shot…”
The minute we found out Sha’Nelle was shot, we ain’t even waste no time gassin’ up the jet. I ain’t ask no questions and I ain’t wait on nobody to explain shit, ’cause the only thing on my mind was gettin’ to her and seein’ what the fuck really happened.
Everything after that moved fast, but it ain’t feel fast. It felt like time was draggin’, and every second was takin’ longer while we was tryna get to ‘Nelle.
We all loaded up in the Suburban like it was automatic when the driver pulled up.
Me, Pressure, Kay’Lo, Toni and Pluto got in without nobody sayin’ nothin’.
And it wasn’t even a question of who was goin’.
The kids was straight with the nannies, and everybody moved like they was supposed to, ’cause that just how it was when it come to ‘Nelle.
The truck stayed quiet the whole way, and that was the part that felt the most off. Wasn’t nobody playin music or talkin’ just to break the silence. Everybody was sittin’ here dealin’ with this bullshit in they own way.
Toni sat in the back, quiet, but I already knew she was fucked up behind that call. This wasn’t just her cousin. That was her best friend, and I could feel that shit comin’ off her without her sayin’ a word.
Kay’Lo had Toni pulled in close to him in the backseat with his arm wrapped around her like he was holdin’ her together without sayin’ too much. She leaned into him, quiet, but you could tell she was barely keepin’ it in.
Pluto sat across from them with one hand on her stomach while she stared ahead, rubbin’ slow like she was tryna calm herself down. She ain’t say nothin’, but the tension in her body said enough.
Pressure leaned forward in the seat like he always did when he was locked in. He was quiet but already thinkin’, tryna figure out what this shit was gon’ turn into before we even got there.
I sat back with my duffel at my feet, watchin’ all of it play out without sayin’ shit either. I was just takin’ it in and tryna keep my own thoughts from runnin’ too far ahead.
Yeah, me and Sha’Nelle hadn’t seen each other in a lil’ minute, but that ain’t mean I didn’t give a fuck.
That ain’t m mean I was cool with somebody tryna take her out, not knowin’ what she meant to my family.
This wasn’t never gon’ sit right with me, no matter what kind of shit me and her had goin’ on.
I kept thinkin’ about ‘Nelle, from the way she moved, the way she talked her shit and just the way she laughed like nothin’ really bothered her.
Me and her had a vibe we never spoke on and I just left it where it was ’cause at the time, I knew better, but that ain’t change the fact that I was gon’ go see about her.
Hearin’ she got shot just didn’t sit right with me.
By the time we pulled up to the jet, the driver barely had that bitch stopped before we was out the truck. Wasn’t nobody wastin’ time draggin’ they feet. Everybody grabbed what they had and moved.
I threw my duffel over my shoulder and walked behind them, feelin’ that weight in it, knowin’ I came prepared for whatever this shit might turn into.
The night felt off, and I couldn’t shake my feelin’s, but I ain’t say nothin’. I just kept movin’.
We all got on the jet and took our seats, still quiet, and sittin’ in that same space. I dropped my bag beside me and leaned back, runnin’ my hand over my face while I tried to piece together what little we knew.
All we had was that ‘Nelle’s mama called Toni and said she got shot, and that was enough to let me know this wasn’t no small situation.
I ain’t know who did it. I ain’t know why they did it. I ain’t know how bad it was. But what the fuck I did know was when we got there, we was gon’ find out.
I looked over at Kay’Lo, then at Pressure, and I could tell they was thinkin’ the same shit I was.
Whoever did this shit wasn’t just about to shoot ‘Nelle and walk away like nothin’ happened. Not with us involved…
I leaned my head back against the seat and stared ahead while the jet started movin’, my jaw tight while I sat here quiet. I wasn’t talkin’ ’cause there wasn’t shit to say right now.
A nigga just was just waitin’ to land, and once we did…
I was ready to see what the fuck really happened.