Chapter 17 Serena
SERENA
This is nice—death.
So quiet. So peaceful.
There is no pain here in this kingdom of nothingness. There is no suffering. There is just—nothing.
Sweet, blissful nothing.
I am weightless, floating through a timeless, matter-less void with no evil kings, no disastrous fates, no ultimatums. All that I was so desperate to hold on to—all those names and faces I remember wishing I could take with me into the next life—they’re getting quieter.
I try to fight it, try to cling to them, but their edges are fraying.
I know I should be concerned, but I’m not. I’m just here. Wherever that is. Or wherever it’s not.
Something ancient yawns in the distance, glittering with promise. It beckons me with a voice so smooth and inviting, it’s hard to resist. I don’t know what awaits me there, but I’m eager to find out. A sense of calm washes over me as I strain toward it.
But that peace is quickly disrupted. I try to fight it. I try and I fail.
Something yanks me backward on an invisible string, and I begin to fall.
Back to my body. Back to panic. Back to fear. Back to chaos.
Back to the overwhelming gravity of life.
I suck in a gasp, racing to catch up to each breath I missed.
But that first breath after sleep? It doesn’t feel like salvation. It feels like the beginning of the end.
“Open your eyes.”
My blurry vision gives way to a male form hovering over me. I blink up at the mess of caramel hair and wide brown eyes.
Wow. He is gorgeous.
The handsome stranger stares down at me, scanning my face. His mouth begins to move, and I realize he’s speaking out loud.
“Serena.” His voice is so familiar. “Say something.”
Serena…Serena, Serena. Oh! That’s me. I think.
He’s staring at me with this intensity, his hair disheveled and his clothes bloody.
Why is he bloody?
The fog in my brain makes thought difficult and memory near impossible.
“Serena.”
He reaches for me (Serena), confusion etched deep in his brow, and I recoil, pedaling backward on my hands. Hurt flickers over his face as he tries again and I scramble to my feet on unsteady legs.
“It’s me.” He lifts his palms.
I stare and stare at that face I know from somewhere. Then it hits me.
Oh my god.
“Zadyn?” I croak through the lump in my throat.
Before I can get myself to move, anxiety sinks its claws into my back. “No. I’m—I died…this isn’t real. This is wrong…this isn’t—”
He surges forward and takes hold of my face. I gasp at the sudden movement.
“This is real,” he whispers.
I try to wade through the layer of mist clouding my mind. I remember screams. Tears falling onto my skin. Warm, white light pressing against me. I glance down at the black blood drying on my ivory gown. My hand flies to my chest, finding only a raised, textured line there. A fresh scar.
I blink, shaking my head.
“No,” I breathe. It’s just another nightmare. Just another cruel trick of the mind.
“Look at me, Serena. Look at me. Feel me. I’m here, you’re here.” He takes my hand and places it over his heart. “You’re alive. This is real.”
His chest pulses beneath my palm—all the evidence I need packed into that violent, sporadic heartbeat. I glance up into warm brown eyes that threaten to melt me down to nothing.
“Zadyn?”
His shoulders relax, but his grip on me doesn’t, not even when I sag in his arms, taking us both down to our knees.
He’s here. This is real. And I’m not dead.
“Hey,” he whispers, lowering his face to mine.
“How are you here?” I sob, taking him in through blurry eyes, gripping him by the arms, the shoulders, the face to make sure he’s real, that this isn’t my mind playing nasty tricks on me.
“It doesn’t matter. You’re safe, that’s all I care about.”
Another flood of memories hits me, threatening to drown me like a tsunami. Images of me crying over Zadyn’s dead body. Images of Jace slain on a battlefield.
I slam my fists into his chest and he stumbles back, shocked. “You should have let me die. I was supposed to die!”
“Don’t you dare say that,” he hisses, gripping the back of my neck with startling ferocity.
“You shouldn’t be here. If he finds you—”
I start to hyperventilate, sucking down shallow breaths, the tightness in my throat becoming unbearable.
“Serena, breathe. Hey, hey, hey. Focus on me. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. I’m here,” he repeats, nodding and holding my gaze until my breathing slows and I regain control of my muscles.
“I know what you’ve been through has been traumatic, but right now I need you to come back to me. I need you to fight your way out of that darkness and come back to me. Just for a little while, I need you to fight. Alright?” Zadyn’s stare is the only thing holding me together.
I nod numbly, straining to find myself beneath the ashes. Beneath the dirt and worms and decay. Beneath the rot.
I’m here! a voice inside me screams. I’m here, let me out.
I reach for her.
And when our hands meet, a fire ignites.
Zadyn pulls me into his arms, and I breathe him in, squeezing tight enough to crack his ribs.
Scuffed black boots step into my line of vision, stopping a few feet away. I follow the length of them up two long legs, stopping when I reach a set of cutting golden eyes.
He stands there unmoving, his expression guarded.
Zadyn tracks my gaze past his shoulder.
The boots step closer. And I stop breathing again.
“Hello, little witch.”