Chapter 71 Serena
SERENA
“You may now kiss your bride!”
The High Priest lifts his palms in exultation. Jace and Sorscha exchange an uncomfortable look.
“And then you will descend back down the aisle, and your ladies will follow behind alongside the males. Any questions?”
The seven of us hold our tongues as the Priest claps his hands together. “Excellent. Let us practice.”
“Is this really necessary?” Jace turns to him, a grimace on his face.
“It is choreography. It needs be rehearsed. One weak link will drag down the rest, so if you please, Highness.”
Jace rolls his eyes, threading Sorscha’s arm through his and leading her back down the stretch of white carpet already rolled out for the wedding in two days.
I take Kai’s arm, and we fall into line behind them, making our way past the servants on ladders, stringing up flower garlands around the perimeter of the ornate chapel.
Cece and Sorscha continue out into the hall while the rest of us linger in the doorway.
“What time is this dinner? I’m starving,” Mar grouses.
“You’re always starving,” Dover mutters.
“What can I say? Being this attractive burns energy like you wouldn’t believe.”
I chuckle. “I’m going to check on Zadyn. He’s been in that library for days.”
He claims to be searching for a way to break this deal without horrific consequences. But I think he’s using it as an excuse to avoid me.
“If anyone can tempt him out, it’s you, savior.” Kai’s brows wag as he gives my hand a squeeze. I rip it away.
“That’s not funny.”
“It’s a little funny. Been meaning to ask—were we interrupting something when we burst into your room the night of the fire? You two seemed so…alarmed.” He slinks back against the marble pillar, a smirk twisting up the corners of his mouth.
“We were sleeping,” I lie.
He tosses his head back and laughs. “Sweetheart, those didn’t look like the faces of two people who’d been asleep—”
“Who’s been asleep?”
I jump at the low rumble of Jace’s voice behind me.
“No one,” I say too quickly. His gaze skirts between me and Kai.
“Right.” Kai clears his throat.
Subtle.
“Well, better get changed for tonight’s festivities.” He salutes us before following our friends out the door.
I lock eyes with Jace.
Furi was right. Getting up close and personal in our training sessions does not aid in our quest for wholesome, G-rated friendship. So this morning was a lot of me trying to limit physical contact, which isn’t very conducive to a productive session. And I’m sure he noticed.
“I should go too.”
“Are you avoiding me?” His question stops me before I reach the hall.
I turn back, offering him a humorless smile. “I can’t really avoid you when we train together every glorious morning.”
“You barely said a word to me this morning. I don’t think it’s fair of you to punish me for going along with an idea you insisted upon.”
“I’m not punishing you. And your marriage wasn’t my idea.”
“To have it in two days was.”
I limit my voice to a hissed whisper. “I’m sorry to impose on your busy schedule, my dear King Regent. We’re only trying to prevent war from breaking out.”
“Forgive me, maybe I’m still a little bitter.”
“You?”
“Yes, witch, me.” He leans a shoulder against the pillar, every inch of him packed with lethal grace. “I never did catch your answer.”
“Answer to what?”
He glances up, muttering a cruel laugh. “Was my proposal that forgettable?”
My mouth parts. “That was…hardly a proposal.”
“What else would you call me asking you to marry me? Please enlighten me.”
“First of all, you can’t ask someone to marry you when you’re already engaged—”
“I did, guess I’m a rule breaker.”
“And second—I was giving you an out.”
“An out?” His eyes narrow.
“Derek had just died. You were in shock, and you were saying things you didn’t really mean. I couldn’t take advantage of that.”
His face hardens. “Don’t you dare tell me I didn’t mean what I said. I knew what I was doing, and you brushed it aside.”
“I’m sorry if you felt that way. But what did you expect?”
“Like a fool, I expected you to take the offer.”
“I couldn’t run away with you. Aren’t you the one who told me we can’t escape our fate?”
“Maybe I changed my mind. Maybe you changed it.”
“You’re getting married. You’re going to be king. Talking about this is pointless.” I don’t mean for my words to sound as harsh as they do.
“It is, isn’t it?” He gives me a cold glare and tears past me. It feels like a punch to the gut.
I make my way into the Grand Hall, pausing at the steps to take in the splendor waiting on the other side.
If this is the precursor to the wedding, I shudder to think how decadent the real deal will be. The entire room has been transformed into a woodland dream. Every inch of wall and ceiling is covered in moss and tangling vines with tiny fae lights sprinkled throughout.
The beauty of this world is never lost on me—even when that beauty is wrapped in thorns sharp enough to draw blood.
I step into the sea of ballgowns, feeling strange without Zadyn by my side. He was with me the first time I danced in this room, when I met the people I would claim as my family. He’s been with me every step of the way, easing my transition into this world.
And I may have ruined everything between us.
Spotting Mar’s mass of auburn hair on the terrace, I cut through the party to find my friends huddled by the open doors.
Every head is angled toward the sprawling lawns below, where two lines of archers are assembled.
Their flaming arrows release at the same moment, shooting up into the night sky and criss-crossing before exploding like dying stars.
The crowd of onlookers “ooh” and “ah” in response.
“I’m going to get a better look.” Eaton excuses himself to join the horde of nobility gathered along the balcony, stopping beside Sorscha.
“Anyone care to dance? I have skills that need to be shown off,” Kai drawls, dusting off his shoulder.
“Don’t look at me.” Mar snickers.
Kai turns to me and inverts his lips into a pout that would be ridiculous on most males. He somehow manages to make it look pornographic.
“Fine,” I cede. “I will be the sacrificial lamb.”
He smiles and snakes his arm around my waist, steering me to the dance floor.
“How are you feeling?” he asks. I place my hand on his shoulder, and we begin to waltz.
“Fine. Why?”
“Well, it’s just that the last wedding you attended got a little”—he makes a face—“bloody.”
I have to laugh.
“As long as you’re not planning any repeats.”
“Nope. I’m praying this wedding will be absolutely uneventful. Boring, even. No surprises.”
“Haven’t you learned by now, Lady Accostia? Court life is chock-full of surprises. Not always the good kind. Couldn’t tempt our little Zadyn from the library?”
“He is not little—”
“Wait, how do you know that?” Kai gives me a dubious grin.
“You know what I mean.” My cheeks flush. “He’s probably getting dressed now.”
“He didn’t come the moment you beckoned? The scandal.”
“Oh, shut up.” We fall silent as Kai’s ballroom expertise carries us across the floor. “We haven’t really had much time to talk. Alone.”
“If it’s a rendezvous you want, you need only ask.”
I press my lips into a flat line. “I want to know how you’re doing. Really.”
“I’m fantastic.”
“Are you? Because I know how good you are at pretending everything is perfectly fine and life is one big riot.” I search his face, but he avoids me, adopting an air of cool indifference. “You went through hell. And you made it out.”
“We both did.”
“Your situation was worse than mine.”
“It’s not a competition.”
“I just want to make sure you’re alright.”
“What answer are you looking for? The truth or the one that makes it easier for you to sleep?” Kai’s ocean eyes finally snap to mine, void of all humor. “Are you alright? Do you get through the nights without waking?”
I blink. “I…manage.”
He barks a cold laugh. “We both know that isn’t true. I can’t give you the answer you want. And if I asked, you’d be unable to do the same. So if you’re wondering why I haven’t brought it up since we escaped, there it is.”
I nod, swallowing. He’s right. He’s not okay. Neither of us is.
“This is the last thing I’ll say about it. I know my brother, Serena.” Kai twirls me, never missing a beat as I finish the rotation and fall back into step with him. “When he thinks something belongs to him, there is nothing he won’t do to keep it that way. He’s not the sharing type.”
“I’m aware.”
“Do not underestimate him. I know you think you’re invincible, but you’re not. Nobody is.”
I sigh. “Kai, please, not you too.”
“I’ll be the first to admit that Jace and Zadyn are a bit too worrisome for my taste, but in this case, they have a point,” he says, hoisting me into the air.
“This is my mess. I need to be the one to fix it.”
His voice is soft when he speaks. “You may be the savior, but you don’t corner the market on sacrifice.”
“Kai, when the time comes, I plan to kill him. I know he’s done unspeakable things…and I also know that he’s your brother.”
“Are you asking my permission or my forgiveness?”
“Both, I guess.”
His gaze locks with mine. “My loyalty is to you. Do what you must.”
I nod.
“May I cut in?”*
Jace is suddenly beside us, the fae lights glinting off his golden eyes and the silver crown nestled into his dark hair. I lose all train of thought. I barely even notice Kai transferring my hand to Jace’s and backing away.
His sturdy arm slides around my waist, pulling me against him with aching gentleness. I shudder. “I’m not really sure this is a good look.”
“What’s not?”
“You and me dancing.” I swallow, forcing myself to stare past his shoulder. “At your rehearsal party.”
“How else was I supposed to get you alone?”
“We’re alone all the time. We’re alone too much.” He quirks a dark brow, spinning me beneath my own arm. “What do you want? You have until the end of this song.”
“Nothing in particular. I guess I just wanted to do this because—”
“Because what?”
“It’s the only chance I’ll ever get.”
Jace becomes the current, pushing me out and pulling me in. Crashing into me with relentless force. Each spin is a claim.
Mine. Mine. Mine.
“Besides, I should be allowed to dance with my…friend.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you use that word before. The ‘f’ word.”
He ignores my statement, his gilded eyes drinking me in from the crown of my head to the lace trim of my violet gown. “You look beautiful. But then again, you always do.”
“I’m not sure friends are supposed to say that.”
“I’m past the point of caring.” Going off my surprised expression, he asks, “What?”
“Your compliments are usually more backhanded.”
“I may not say it often—or ever—” He glances at the floor. “But every time I look at you, I find something else to fall in love with.”
“And what is it this time?”
“I could never choose just one.”
My stomach flutters.
“It’s everything. Your spirit. Your touch. Your voice.” His hands press against my back, holding me a little tighter. “I think you’re the best and worst thing to ever happen to me.”
“I’m not sure that’s a compliment.”
“Not a compliment.” I blink up at him. “Fact,” he reminds me, earning him a laugh.
“But for posterity’s sake, just this once, with no one able to hear—” He leans down, brushing his whisper over my ear.
“I will tell you how unfairly beautiful you are. How I wish this entire world were the color of your eyes. How this tiny freckle has become the center of my universe, and it’s no bigger than a pin prick.
” He reaches out to tap the tiny beauty mark below my lip.
My mouth opens, but he shakes his head.
“Don’t say anything. I just want to enjoy this.”
“Jace—”
“Without your yapping ruining the moment,” he teases, lifting me above his head and making my stomach dip. “Just until the end of the dance—don’t say anything. Let’s just pretend this isn’t ending.”
“I don’t know if I can do that.” My voice is a flimsy leaf trembling in the wind.
“Like I said,” he murmurs. “Pretend.”
So I try. I let our eyes do the talking. I let my body succumb to him, moving to his lead as the music swallows the silence between us.
This moment is ours. Just him and me. Our first dance. And our last.
I spin out, and time moves slower. At the last moment, he finds my hand and reels me in, catching me over his knee mere inches from the ground. And for that one second, he lets me read in his face all he’s never said.
All he will never say.
I lose my breath as he sets me on my feet. But his mask is already back on. The hard-shelled mask I’ve come to know so well. He doesn’t spare me another glance as he walks away, ignoring my parted mouth and the words that just died on my tongue.
* Cue: another woman by Coral Moons