CHAPTER TWELVE
All too soon, we were arriving at the home I shared with Lexie. I had completely forgotten how good it was riding on a motorcycle with Bo—I mean Chains. I need to remember he hasn’t been Bodie for a very long time.
Chains parks the bike in the visitors” parking lot of the apartment building, waiting for me to get off, which I quickly do before he does too. When I had seen him earlier at the gym, I couldn’t believe I hadn’t noticed all the piercings he had before.
When would you have noticed? An unwelcome voice invades my thoughts. It’s been over a year since you’ve even spoken to him, let alone seen him.
I shake my head to dislodge those thoughts. It doesn’t matter because he and I are nothing to each other. Not anymore, anyway.
At one time, I would have given the earth to be Chains’ girl. But those times have long passed. Silly wishes of a young girl in love. We’re not the young teens we were back then. Or I’m not. I can’t do this, there’s no point in rehashing the past. It’s done, it’s gone, and I can’t bring it back.
As usual, since I’ve been back in Chains presence, I stand there like an idiot, not moving. My reaction to him is pissing me off. It’s not like I haven’t seen him before, it’s just that my mind is stuck on all the tatts and piercings I’d seen, and my brain must’ve short circuited.
Clearing my throat, I force my hands to stop splaying together as I finally turn to look at him. “Well, thanks for bringing me home. I guess I’ll see you around.”
Turning on my heel, I make my way to the front door, not realizing footsteps had been behind me the whole time until I retrieved the key Lexie gave me, and tried to unlock the door.
The thought of being alone for hours on end, while Lexie was at work, was making my hands shake, and I couldn’t find the keyhole in the door. Sweat broke out along my brow and above my lip, as a sturdy hand covered in an all-black tattoo of a compass comes out from behind me to take the key from my fingers, and I can’t help but jump back with a yelp.
“It’s only me, little one,” he whispers close to my ear, and I can’t stop the shiver of awareness that wracks my whole body. I let go of the keys and inadvertently sink into him as he unlocks the door.
His erection presses into my bottom, and all I want to do is push back against him, but I restrain myself. Barely. After everything I’ve been through, I refuse to act like a hussy. But am I really a hussy if only this man inspired those reactions inside me?
I have no time to dwell on the answer to that question, as he gently pushes me through the doorway.
“Lock up, little one,” he tells me, his hands in the pockets of his jeans, before turning on his heel and quickly heading down the driveway back to his motorcycle. Just as he was about to throw his leg over the bike, I open my big mouth.
“Did you want to come inside?” Without thinking, I call out and anxiously bite my lip as he turns his gaze towards me. I can’t believe I just did that. But the thought of spending the night alone was complete anathema to me.
Silently, he stalks back towards me, wrapping his hand around the back of my neck, forcing my head up so that I was looking at him. I thought I would recoil from a man’s touch, but it’s just like earlier at the gym; whenever Chains touched me, I didn’t feel disgust. I felt wanton and needy.
The man missed nothing, as he looked down at me with a look of concern.
“Is everything alright, little one?” he demands gruffly.
I clear my throat, trying to school my features into a mask of indifference, and not to show just how much this man affects me. Especially when he uses that endearment.
“Yes, everything’s fine. Sorry, you can go, I’m sure you have a busy evening ahead.” But the words I want to say don’t pass my lips. Because I was sure he had the club girls lined up tonight for a good time.
Chains smiles almost indulgently, like he’s aware of what I wanted to say. Motioning with his head, give’s my lower back a little shove. “Inside, babe. I’m right behind you.”
I want to say that I know he is. I can feel him surrounding me. But of course, I don’t. I keep my mouth tightly shut.
“If you wanted me to stay, all you had to do was say the words. I’ll stay as long as you need me to,” he says, removing his cut and hanging it almost reverently over the dining room chair.
“I didn’t want to keep you from whatever your plans were for tonight.” I reply in a whisper.
His large hands came out to cup my face, and again, all I felt was a deep-seated need inside me.
“Whenever you need me, little one; all you have to do is call. I’m available to you anytime, day or night,”
My eyes go wide, and I can’t suppress my gasp. He never said anything like that to me before. Suddenly, he leans down and gently kissed my forehead. I wanted to lift my head so that our lips would meet. But that would be too dangerous for both of us, but mostly for my heart. I hadn’t kissed Chains in over ten years. I hadn’t even been in his arms.
With his arms around me, and his lips on my skin, albeit an innocent touch, it’s more than I’ve had from him in such a long time.
After barely acknowledging me all these years, he couldn’t be after more from me than friendship, could he? I can’t entertain anything more right now, not after everything that’s happened with me and Caleb. I didn’t think I had it in me to start anything up again with Bodie.
To distract myself from all my jumbled thoughts, I go into the kitchen and open the freezer compartment of the fridge. Retrieving two prepacked meals of lasagna I made a few days ago, just to keep myself busy, and to not think of the fact that I was alone while Lexie was at the club working.
“I hope you like lasagna?” I call out, thinking Chains was still in the living room, when I feel his arms lock me against the countertop.
“You smell like strawberries. Did you know that?” he whispers against my temple, and I can feel my heartbeat race, and a shiver runs down my spine.
“It’s my body wash.” I blurt out. Stupid, stupid girl. I chide myself. What is wrong with you?
“It’s turning me on,” he replies, nuzzling my neck, until I feel a sharp nip to my skin, and gasp in surprise as his tongue soothes the bite. He presses his hard-on against my ass cheeks one more time before he moves to sit at the dining table.
“I love lasagna,” he declares, as though nothing had just transpired between us. Meanwhile, I’m burning up like a volcano. I clear my throat, and busy myself with defrosting the meals, and plating them up. Adding a fresh garden salad to the mix.
I place his plate in front of him and sit down next to him with my own, silently eating. Trying desperately to ignore his own maddening scent, which makes me want to climb him like a tree. Something that I shouldn’t want to be doing since Caleb had beaten those feelings out of me. Or so I thought.
“Do you think Ky was serious about me working at the gym?” I ask, stabbing a lettuce a little too aggressively when I think back to the way I let Chains touch me without putting up more of a fight. Hating to admit that his touches felt like home.
He lets his knife and fork clatter onto the plate, wiping his mouth with a napkin.
“Why wouldn’t he? You’d be an asset to the team. And having you around all day would be a bonus,” he adds. Getting to his feet, he saunters to the refrigerator and takes out a beer. “You want anything?” he asks.
I show him the glass of water next to me. “I’m good, thanks.”
“The food was delicious. Did you make it?”
“Yes, I made a big batch the other day to distract myself while Lexie was at work.” Crap, I did it again. I keep blurting out things I shouldn’t. I used to be an independent, smart woman who didn’t need her hand held at night. I turn my back, busying myself with putting the dirty dishes in the dishwasher.
I can see when the light bulb goes off inside Chains head, as a look of understanding crosses his face. He grins at me, and my heart stutters.
“Do you wanna watch a movie? I’ve been dying to see the new one with Tom Cruise. All the brothers say it’s good.”
I know which one he’s talking about, and I smile lightly. I’ve been wanting to see that one too. “Sure. Why not?” I reply, going to the living room and setting up the movie on Lexie’s streaming app on the TV.
Chains sits on the couch and pats the cushion next to him, as I debate where to park my ass. I feel like a deer caught in the headlights of a car. Do I sit next to him and endure his closeness for hours, or do I sit away from him and prove to him he bothers me?
With a sigh, I plonk myself down on the couch beside Chains, pretending that being this close to him does nothing for me. I’m sure he knows it’s a crock of shit. But I’m determined not to jump his bones for the simple fact he only stayed because I was afraid to be alone. Not because he wanted to.
Not even half an hour into the movie, I could feel my eyes droop, and didn’t even react when Chains wrapped me in his arms, and I leaned my head on his comfortably broad chest. I felt safe, warm, and cocooned from everything. Like nothing could touch me. And at that moment, I was sure nothing could.