Chapter 15
Chapter fifteen
Winona Bishop
Creature In The Black Night — Dayseeker
There’s a voice in my head—a menacing voice that urges me to slip off the edge again. It shuts me up every time I try to scream.
I stare at the shower faucet on the wall as warm water pricks my skin like needles, but there isn’t enough water to wash me clean.
A lump forms in my throat. The sound of the drain swallowing water and gurgling, like the man I killed, turns my stomach upside down.
I squeeze my eyes shut and there he is… right before me.
I jump out of bed at the loud rev of Reeve’s motorcycle. A huge smile spreads across my face. He’s finally home. I haven’t seen him all day.
Jogging downstairs, I yank the door open and wait.
He stalls longer than usual, letting the engine rumble. I scan the property. The guards walk around, used to seeing Reeve and me together, so they don’t pay much attention.
Reeve cuts the engine, swings his leg back, and climbs off the R1 in slow motion, as if he’s heard today’s saddest news. He also disappeared earlier after seeing Grandma.
As he pulls his helmet off, I step closer.
“Are you okay?” I ask, my hand rubbing his back. “Did my grandma find out about us?” I knew she would. It took her longer than I expected, but she’s Romina Bishop after all. I’m an adult, not a kid who needs guidance, and I can choose who I want to spend my time with.
I can choose him.
All of him.
“You’re being distant because you need some space or…” I add.
His face softens as he realizes it, and an affectionate smile pulls at the corners of his lips.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to seem distant.” He tugs me closer, softly stroking my hair. I already sense there’s something he’s not saying. “She found out, but it’s okay. She promised to stay out of it.”
I’m wrapped in the safety of his embrace, knowing he is gradually opening up to me.
He allows himself to confide in someone, even when he’s holding back.
He tries so hard not to cave in or let the darkness take over.
And I get it. I know how painful it can be.
He’s desperately trying to keep me from seeing his struggles, but he’s shattering inside despite the strong front he puts on.
He may have overcome many things that his eyes refuse to forget, but he’s still healing.
It might take longer, maybe forever. But with the right person, he will thrive.
I can breathe around him.
I trust him.
“You don’t need to be sorry. I want you to talk to me.” I blink up at him. His heart is pounding against mine. I want to cherish him in return.
We can overcome anything together. It’s him and me. Always has been.
“You can tell me what’s on your mind later if you want, but right now, I want you to kiss me and forget everything.”
Large arms lift me against him, and his lips pull mine into a passionate kiss. When our tongues meet, everything else fades away. I bring my hands to cup his face, and the short stubble prickles my skin, sparking electrifying jolts through me.
I adore his little obsession, mainly because I’m the obsession. It’s intoxicating how he looks at me like I’m the only girl in the world. Reeve is caring and passionate, intelligent and observant. Every room he walks into lights up like a sky full of lighters.
Before he entered my life, the people around me were fine, but I felt numb in their presence.
Reeve speaks to me in languages I don’t speak, but I understand every single word.
That’s why I’ve never let anyone get near me; something inside me wouldn’t allow it.
He works for my attention even when he receives every bit of it.
He stole and ripped it effortlessly; nothing I do deters him from grabbing it even more.
Life was meaningless before him, devoid of color.
“Let’s take you to class and hang out before it starts. The sun feels nice,” Reeve suggests with a charming grin.
I nod and sprint inside to grab my things before returning to put on my helmet and hop on the bike behind him, clasping my hands tightly around his abs.
I will never tire of this freeing feeling of being wrapped around him when he gives me peace. I spread my arms to the sides, strumming the wind as we near my campus.
We arrive just in time to bask on the lawn outside. Chatter, laughter, and hurried footsteps fill the air. Students come and go; some are chilling like us.
I lie between Reeve’s legs, our hands intertwined on either side.
He kisses the top of my head when I’m hit with a surge of déjà vu.
“Grandma took me to Germany once when I was twelve, to a peaceful place with the greenest lawns and the widest fields I’ve ever seen.
Funny that it surfaced right now,” I recall.
“Did you enjoy your stay there?” His voice brushes my face as I lean against his chest, letting my body relax in his comforting presence.
My man.
“I had. It was the ideal destination after everything that had transpired at home with the Halloween Killers. I started having nightmares, but once we arrived, they stopped. Grandma took us to her private land in a remote area where people trained.” I smile playfully as if I’m telling him a magical story.
“I was lying on the grass, soaking up the sunlight, when I saw someone staring at me. When I looked around, I saw a boy. He was sitting right across from me, watching. You know that feeling when you just know someone? Even though you’ve never met them.
I swear I recognized him, maybe from a past life or something.
The bright sun made it hard to see his face, but when he smiled, the heavy weight on my chest eased.
I later called him my guardian angel when I discussed it with Grandma. ”
She told me it was Reeve, and it made sense.
It feels as if Reeve stops breathing, and I tip my head back to look at him. When he gazes down at me, his eyes vulnerable and glossy, my heart squeezes in my chest, and tears well up in my eyes.
“Hey, what happened?” I turn around to comfort him.
“I remembered something.” His voice is strained, almost choked, as he clears it and drags his hand over his face. “Your class is almost starting. Want to bail?” he asks with a smirk, as if nothing happened a minute ago. I brush it off, too, and give him a dose of my usual sass to lighten the mood.
“Reeve Hardy, I have perfect class attendance. You will not corrupt me.”
“What if I kiss each freckle on your face? My favorite constellation.” He looks at me with those daring eyes that sparkle with mischief.
“My answer is still no.”
“Good girl.” He places his thumb and forefinger under my chin. “I was just checking to see how easily you bend.”
My cheeks flush. “Mhmmm.” Laughter and giggles escape me at his words and the cute little gesture. “You will have to try harder or apply more pressure if you want me to bend,” I retort.
Nibbling on his lower lip, he leans closer to whisper in my ear. “Oh yeah?” I feel him sniff my musky-scented perfume. Then a sharp sting meets my earlobe as his teeth sink into it before he says, “I’ll test that theory next time.”
“Why did you leave me with all of these heartbreaking memories?” My voice breaks, and my shoulders tremble. “It’s not fair.”
I constantly live in a state of déjà vu. Every stolen glance, heady kiss, accidental touch, or intentional one swarms my mind and strangles me. I relive him over and over again, experiencing him in every way imaginable, as if I didn’t, he’d be erased.
Those memories cut me deeply, and the scars he left refuse to fade as my darkest days pull me into a whirlwind of suffocating silence. When will my mind go quiet?
“When will you leave me alone?”
It tears at my insides.
Just let me go.
“You promised not to go, and you left.”
My eyes burn, filled with fresh tears. The water and my tears blend together, and I can’t tell what’s real anymore.
“Wherever it is that you are, please set me free.”
I suppose I have one answer: no matter what I do, he will always reside in my mind, fighting to remain there and rule the deepest parts of me.
Some say there are worse things than death: suffering, for example. It has a chokehold on everyone caught in it. But if monsters breathe oxygen, and my husband was forced to inhale their toxic fumes, they deserve to die.
Grandma was right.
This place is cruel.
It forces us to confront our timid selves, relive our memories, and survive while death breathes down our necks. It pushes us to ask more questions without any hope of finding answers. It completely isolates us from our minds, bodies, and souls for the chance to form a new identity.
In the end, my biggest fear is that I will forget about him someday. Not because I want to, but because I will finally let go.
I want to… but deep down I don’t.
I wear my insulated suit, don a beanie, and head to the balcony.
Three months have passed since I entered this tower. Thick blankets of snow cover the forest, accumulating nearly every day. I adjusted the retractable sunshade with Jason’s guidance to shield myself from the heavy snowfall.
We experienced only one power outage that lasted ten minutes until the power returned. He kept talking me through it, refusing to remain silent for too long.
The stream below has turned into ice. The buzzing forest is quieter. Everyone is hibernating, including us.
Jason snaps his head toward me when he sees me against the railings, communicating volumes with a fleeting glance from the other side.
The heartbreak in his eyes catches me off guard sometimes.
His face remains a mystery, and I don’t think he plans to reveal himself anytime soon.
I wonder if there’s a reason behind it, like a scar or disfigurement he’s hiding, or maybe he just feels comfortable wearing a mask.
Whatever it is, I’ve grown to enjoy his company.
A gust of snow flurries past the top rail beside me as I place the radio on it and smile from ear to ear.