Chapter 13
Amir
“So, fourth game,” Remi said. “Gonna win this one?”
He was leaning against the wall outside of the locker room, his headphones around his neck as if they were a safety blanket.
A red and white baseball jersey with my name and number on it hugged his chest. I hadn’t gotten it for him, so I had no idea where it had come from.
The short sleeves left his tattoos on display.
Red Sox colors looked incredible on him, and paired with his ripped black jeans, he was a sight to behold. A touch of lawlessness dripped from him while the rest lurked somewhere beneath where I couldn’t see it. He carried a raw, defiant sort of chaos, but also deliberately controlled.
Technically, he probably shouldn’t have been back here, but it was impossible to tell Remi not to do something. I could only imagine how much of a wild card he’d been as a teenager.
I was dying to learn more, but I didn’t want to freak him out.
Even after our talk a couple days ago, I wasn’t sure exactly what had made him run away.
I still didn’t know what he wanted from this situation.
I didn’t know what I wanted from it either.
It was like his mere presence dared me to go exploring, and I wasn’t even the type who enjoyed an adventure.
When I stepped closer, I glanced around, but then I remembered that it didn’t matter. It was probably better that we were seen together, showing affection and whatnot.
“We’re going to win,” I said as I touched his bicep with the tips of my fingers.
He rotated his lip ring from the inside with his tongue. A smirk settled on his face, and it made focusing harder than it should’ve been.
“You lost to some random team I’ve never heard of.”
“We’re warmed up now.”
“You said they were from a college,” he pointed out. “That’s pathetic.”
I put a finger to his lips. “I don’t want to talk about baseball anymore.”
“It’s the only thing of substance I know about you.”
“Then ask me something.”
He pushed my hand away from his lips. “What’s Mallory like?”
“Not my daughter either.”
“Protective?”
“Always.”
“I assume the ex-wife is also off limits.”
With a sigh, I leaned my forearm on the wall beside him, which brought me closer. “My parents live in Dubai.”
“I don’t care about your parents.”
“Ah, okay.”
Maybe he wasn’t as interested in me as I was in him. Or I didn’t strike him as interesting in the way that made someone want to delve deeper into their mind, their past, the motivations behind every move they made, especially the strange ones.
I’d started to think he wanted the same from me, but now I wondered if he did only want something surface-level. He said we’d see what happened. I guess that was all we could do.
Shifting forward, I hovered my lips in front of his for a moment before I closed the distance.
I found it odd how easy this felt, which just made me want to do it more.
For all I knew, it would be like this with anyone.
Although, there was a difference between lust and desire.
I hadn’t quite sorted out which one this was.
His mouth against mine was soft, as pliant as he’d been last time.
He was such a conundrum—hot and cold, fluctuating seemingly at random.
I breathed him in as I deepened the kiss, and he parted his lips for me.
I ran my thumb across his stubble and felt it against my face, scratching away at any bit of resistance I’d been holding on to.
Pressing my body more firmly against his, I slipped my tongue into his mouth. He stroked it with his, giving me a taste of cinnamon. It might’ve been his signature, and part of me hated that I’d never be able to taste it again without thinking of him.
“Why don’t you care about my parents?” I asked.
He laughed against my mouth. “Offended?”
Cupping the back of my neck, he bit down on my lip, then traced the spot with his tongue. I slipped my hand under his shirt and explored the curve of his waist, the subtle definition of his stomach.
“I already know they live in Dubai.”
I kissed along his jaw. “Google, huh?”
“There’s not much to find. You’re a private person.”
“I don’t owe anyone a look into my life.” Moving my lips behind his ear, I made a path to his hairline, then back. “But I’m offering you one, so either ask something or tell me you’re only interested in my body.”
“Fine. Are you religious?”
“No, not really.”
“What’s that mean?”
Unable to help myself, I returned to his lips. He tried to say something, but I smothered it. My hand found its way into his hair, and I gathered it between my fingers firmly.
“Maybe I’m spiritual,” I replied, a little breathless.
“That’s a cop out.”
“You’ll make fun of me.”
He took my jaw and forced me back enough to look at me. “Now you have to tell me.”
“You first.”
“Pagan.”
“What kind?”
“Norse, but if Hecate wanted to speak to me, I’d hear her out.”
I touched his necklace, which was like a strangely slanted F. “What does this mean?”
“It’s a Fehu rune, for prosperity and beginnings, but also for Freyja and Freyr.”
“It’s important to you,” I said, unable to recall a time when he’d taken it off.
His eyes flicked away. “Your turn.”
“I don’t believe any one thing in particular,” I explained. “But some things interest me. Out there things.”
“How out there?”
My nose wrinkled as I considered whether to answer. “More conspiracy than logic.”
“All beliefs are conspiracy. What, are you making sacrifices to the old gods or something? Because same.”
“Nah, I just think it’s interesting to study all possible angles. You know, pyramids, ancient civilizations, Anunnaki, etcetera, etcetera.”
He covered his mouth as he held in a laugh. “Oh, you’re into conspiracy conspiracies. You’re not going to say the Earth is flat, right?”
I snorted. “No. I like where science and the spiritual converge.”
“You know who would find that interesting? Clara.”
My eyes narrowed. “You’re not funny.”
“As if it wasn’t bad enough that you’re into butt stuff. You’re also crazy, and you’re dating a heathen.” He gasped dramatically. “Such a monster, Amir.”
“Think so?”
“Mmhmm.” With the hand not on my jaw, he traced down my zipper. “The worst of mankind.”
“Want to burn in hell with me?”
The corner of his mouth lifted. His expression didn’t change as he curled his fingers over my waistband.
“Amir, get your ass in here,” Shawn said, sticking his head out of the locker room.
“Uh, yeah. Coming.”
“Bring the boyfriend, I don’t care. Just hurry up.”
With a wink, Remi dragged me inside. I wanted to protest, but it was a bit late for that.
A couple of the guys greeted us, and we made small talk for a minute until Shawn whistled to get everyone’s attention.
I was about to head over to the others, but Remi brought me to a table loaded with trays of food.
He sat in a chair and kicked back, so I followed suit.
It was a small separation from the rest, and as he ran his fingers up my thigh, I was grateful for it. Everyone seemed to like him, but it was somewhat awkward to have him around all the time. None of the guys’ girlfriends or wives were invited back here, so I had to wonder if it was strange.
As if he could hear my thoughts, he shifted his path beneath the table. I glanced at him when he grazed my dick through my pants. I tried to take his hand, but he quickly tugged my zipper down and dipped his fingers inside.
Hyperaware of everyone in the room, my eyes darted around to make sure nobody was paying attention.
Shawn went on about the same shit he always did before a game.
Spring training games weren’t official like during the season, but this was the first time we’d be facing off against the Braves since last year’s World Series, so it would set the stage in a way.
Putting my arm over the back of Remi’s chair, I pinched his arm. He leaned closer and circled his thumb over my dick. I pursed my lips as I tried to pay attention to Shawn, but Remi didn’t let up. My growing arousal made him double down, his fingers tracing the length of my shaft.
I set my phone on the table and typed out a message. Stop.
He tapped on the screen without pausing his movements. After you finish.
I stared at the phone with a mixture of nerves and what might’ve been excitement. It was depraved. Arguably, it was insane.
Why the hell was I considering it?
In one quick movement, I unbuttoned my pants to give him more access. I shifted further under the table to make sure nobody could see, and he snickered softly.
I put my lips next to his ear. “You’re a demon from the pits of hell.”
He moved to the inside of my briefs, and I clenched my teeth when his cool fingers touched me.
My legs tensed as he angled his wrist to stroke me once.
With his thumb on my shaft, he reached lower to lift both of my balls and roll them in his palm.
Blood pumped to my groin, making me grow in his hand.
Expertly, he wrapped his fingers around my dick and flicked his wrist to jerk me hard.
My knee bumped the table, and a few of the guys looked at me.
“There was a roach.” I wanted to smack myself when they glanced at the floor under the table. Thankfully, they moved on and returned their attention to Shawn.
Remi’s thumb brushed over my head, and I had to release my breath slowly. His pace was maddening, entire seconds devoted to stroking me in one direction. When he reached the tip again, his nails grazed the inside of my thigh and sent goosebumps racing across my skin.
Suddenly, his touch disappeared. I sucked in a breath from the loss and glanced over at him. He brought his hand to his mouth and faked a cough, then dragged his palm downward. When he returned to my dick, he spread his saliva across it.
My fingers dug into my thighs, acting as my only outlet. Every breath was too loud, or maybe they were only loud to me. My heartbeat pounded in my ears, and the conversation around me faded as if wrapped in a bubble.
Remi tapped on my phone a few times, and I peered at it. I hate how quiet you are.
All I did was shake my head. What’d he expect me to do? Moan right in the middle of a team meeting? He’d probably love that.
I leaned my elbows on the table and stared at the wall past Shawn.
Remi’s grip was relentless, and with quick flicks of his wrist that were imperceptible from above, he drove me closer to my release.
With everything I had, I kept my face as blank as possible.
As the feeling built, I curled my toes in my shoes and clenched my thighs.
A grunt escaped me, and I cleared my throat to hide it.
“Hey, sorry,” Remi said, drawing everyone’s attention. I wanted to smack him because he’d clearly lost his fucking mind. His hand was on my dick, jacking me off with his spit, for God’s sake. “This is random, but I’m drawing a blank here. Anyone play Mortal Kombat?”
Jeffrey perked up. “Yeah, why?”
“Just writing a poem for my buddy, Oli. What’s that guy say before a fatality?”
“Finish him,” Jeffrey said, doing his best impression.
Remi snapped his fingers and broke into a grin. “That’s it. Thanks. Carry on.”
I shot him a glare, but he winked and nodded toward the front.
He switched to short movements at the tip, and if I wasn’t in this situation, I would have stopped him.
It was so overstimulating that my hands fisted to hide the way they began to shake.
I arched a little in my seat, unable to hold back completely as the feeling ignited in my balls and spread rapidly down my shaft.
I pressed the heels of my hands against my eyes.
With my face hidden, my mouth fell open and I stopped breathing, too afraid of what would come out of me otherwise.
Remi’s palm cupped the tip of my dick as I came, and he used his thumb to stimulate beneath my head.
It was easily the best orgasm of my life after the one I’d had on his pool table, and he coaxed it further with his persistent touch.
As soon as I could think semi-clearly, I focused on fixing my face. If anyone saw me right this second, they’d know exactly what had happened. I’d never live that down. No doubt someone on the team would leak the information, then my reputation would be completely fried.
“Amir, you alright?” Shawn asked.
Swiping both hands down my face casually, I made a show of squinting. “Got a bit of a migraine from these LEDs, I think.”
“Do you need me to change the lineup? I’ve got you batting first.”
“I’ll be great once I’m out of here.”
“Good. We’ve got a reputation to win back.”
Story of my life.
Remi removed his hand, but he used it to squeeze my thigh firmly over my pants.
I frowned down at them, grateful they were white, otherwise I’d have a hand-shaped cum stain for the world to see.
He pushed his chair back, then stood and stretched both arms above him.
My eyes widened when he reached for a cookie from one of the trays.
He took a bite, then looked at a crumb on his finger and sucked it into his mouth.
“God, I love sweet things,” he groaned. He licked the pad of his thumb, and I couldn’t take it anymore.
Inconspicuously, I secured my pants and scooted my chair back. “You should get to your seat.”
“Yeah, I’ll do that. Maybe I should bring a cookie for Roman.”
I caught his wrist mid-air and gripped it tightly enough to make a point as I dragged him to the side, further from prying eyes. “Wash your hands.”
“Will do, baseball man.”
He started to walk toward the sinks, but he paused. I watched him cautiously as he leaned closer.
“I have one more question before I go.”
When he pressed his lips against mine, I wondered if this was what it felt like to lose your mind. If so, I was inclined to feel an odd camaraderie with the inhabitants of Wonderland.
“Do you like the taste of yourself?” he murmured, so softly I almost didn’t catch it.
Gripping the back of his neck, I flicked his lip with my tongue. “I liked your taste a lot better.”
“Oh, he’s not shy.”
My lips curved. “I’ll take you out tonight.”
“Out?” His brows rose, though I wasn’t sure what exactly was surprising.
“A date. Wine, three courses, candles. The whole nine yards.”
“Uh, why?”
“That’s a ridiculous question.” I glanced around at the guys, who were far more focused than I was. “I have to get ready. See you after, okay?”
He just nodded before he turned and left the room.
Remi was a little backwards. A hand job in a room full of professional baseball players was casually exhilarating for him. Meanwhile, being treated like he mattered made him uncomfortable.
Maybe I wanted to do a bit more of that. Maybe I wanted to see how much it took for him to stop turning into a deer in headlights. Maybe I wanted to discover exactly what had made him think that he was worthless, even though it must’ve been something horrific.
For now, I was going to play some goddamn baseball.