Chapter 15 Evie
Evie
Vaughn stood outside a closed door, arms folded in a military-like stance, looking like he was protecting the most precious person in the world. That it was my sister’s door caused tears of gratitude to fill my eyes. I paused in front of him.
“D-does she know yet?” I asked quietly, in case Evy could hear me.
When I’d realized he was Abi’s husband the night before, I’d known it was time to have an in-depth discussion with my sister.
If we were going to stay in Creswell Springs, we both needed to face the role Vaughn had played in our lives.
“She knows I’m here. It would be better for both of you to have a long conversation about that night.” He stepped aside, and I was thankful Mila didn’t ask questions. There was enough drama going on around us. “She’s resting at the moment.”
Inside, Abi was sitting on a chair beside the bed where my sister was sleeping.
Standing there looking down at her, I was thrown back to the moment I had been the one in her position, waking up in a bed similar to the one she was lying in.
How scared and alone I’d been, how angry and soul-weary I’d felt until I’d seen Evy.
From the moment I’d seen her, and realized she wasn’t a psychosis-induced hallucination, I’d started to heal.
But in the time since we’d been reunited, I’d seen the price my twin had paid.
She’d spent so long fighting to get me back, protecting me, that somewhere along the way she’d forgotten to live for herself.
That was on me. I hadn’t fought for her the way she had fought for me.
Selfishly, I’d pretended like everything was perfect now, when she was destroying herself.
Swallowing a sob that tried to choke me, I made it as far as the foot of the bed before the first tear fell.
“It’s not as bad as you might be thinking,” Mila said softly, her hand touching my back.
“She was having an allergic reaction all day. I didn’t realize how bad it was, how uncomfortable she was.
And then Rory came in. Things got heated and a little chaotic.
When everything started to calm down, Everly started to panic.
She was sedated and given antihistamines as well as plenty of fluids in an attempt to flush everything. ”
Scrubbing a hand over my wet cheek, I couldn’t tear my eyes from my twin. “An allergy to what? Neither of us is allergic to anything that I’m aware of.”
“About that.” Mila sighed. “You and Chance didn’t have sex, did you?”
Surprised by such a personal question from someone I barely knew, I looked at her. “What does that have to do with my sister?”
She grimaced. “Everything. You’re identical, which I know from experience means that if one is allergic to the spermicide in condoms, then the other would be as well. Everly found that out the hard way. That it was her first time probably didn’t help the situation.”
“Oh.” That information began to sink in. “Oh.”
“Yeah.” She looked at me expectantly, and I realized she was waiting for me to answer her original question.
Snapping my gaze back to my sleeping sister, I clenched my hands into fists at my sides. “I didn’t have sex with Chance.”
That surprised her. “Huh, okay. Well, at least only one of you had to experience this particular predicament. And now you know. For future reference.”
Abi hummed an agreement. “Her doctor mentioned that she would be released once she’s awake and able to confirm that the treatment plan is helping. Blood work confirmed it was an allergic reaction and not an underlying condition.”
“That’s a relief,” Mila murmured and stepped back. “I’m going to head back to the waiting room. I know what happened when you first got here must have been a lot, and I don’t want to overwhelm you.”
“Thank you for taking care of Evy for me,” I told her, attempting to give her a smile. “I don’t know how to repay you.”
“None of that shit. Everly is one of my people now. And I always take care of what’s mine.
” She opened the door but hesitated, looking back at me.
“Rory doesn’t want to like you, Evie. No one is going to change her mind.
Not even Matt or Chance. If you want to be with Chance, you’re going to have to hold on tight until she finally accepts it. ”
That echoed what Matt had said the night before, and I’d taken it as a warning. At the time, I thought he meant I’d have to hold on to Chance because of all the other women in his life. Now I was wondering if it was because of a single woman. His mother.
Shaking that thought away, I turned my gaze back to my sister before the door shut behind Mila. I didn’t need anyone’s advice when it came to Chance. He’d already put cracks in my heart. I wasn’t going to give him the power to break it completely.
Too late.
Ignoring that annoying inner voice that continued to haunt me, telling me that I’d already given Chance the power because I’d already given him my stupid heart, I focused on the only thing that was important.
Evy. Abi stayed with me for a little while, but when Evy started to get restless again, she excused herself to give us privacy.
Taking my sister’s hand, I sat in the chair by her bed, counting her breaths and thanking the universe for not taking her from me.
Silent tears fell. If something happened to Evy, I wouldn’t survive.
She was my reason to keep fighting the darkness that was always lurking at the edges of my mind, keeping the constant taunts from William’s ghost to end it all whispering in my ear.
But maybe, for Evy, I was a burden, the one thing that kept her from putting herself first.
She shifted on the bed, growing more restless, the sedative starting to fade. A tiny moan left her, a twitch of her fingers letting me know I’d been holding on to her a little too tightly.
“I’m so sorry, Evy,” I whispered. Not just for clenching her fingers so hard. If I had to list all the things I needed to apologize to her for, we would be there for a week.
Lashes fluttered and then lifted, confusion pulling at her brows, causing her nose to scrunch like it normally did when she was trying to get all the details sorted in her mind.
Afternoon had faded into early evening. With the lights dimmed and the sun dipping lower in the sky outside, there was only a soft, hopefully healing glow in the room to see by.
Once her eyes focused on me, she started to smile, but that quickly turned to a frown when she was finally able to see me more clearly. I swallowed another sob, sent out another thank-you to the universe, and forced a smile. “H-hey, you’re awake.”
“Who made you cry?” she croaked out.
Of course her first thought was to worry about me.
She was lying in a fucking hospital bed, with wires and tubes attached to her, but instead of thinking of herself, Evy wanted to know about me.
I wasn’t going to dump all my crap on her, though.
“I was just worried about you. How are you feeling? Any discomfort?”
Brows pulling together, she was quiet for a moment, taking stock of her body and remembering all the events that had led to her ending up in the hospital. “I’m fine. Now tell me who made you cry.”
Scrubbing my tears away, I closed my eyes. Swallowing roughly, I blew out a frustrated breath before looking right at her. “Can you stop worrying about me for two minutes and focus on yourself? Please, Evy. We are two separate people. You matter too, damn it.”
Surprised, my sister shrank back a little, staring up at me like I’d grown another head. “I-I know we are separate people,” she whispered.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to raise my voice. It’s just that you spend so much time worrying about me that you forget about yourself. You are the most important person in the world to me. If it weren’t for you, I don’t think I would be alive right now.”
There was no thinking about it. My life would have ended when I’d swallowed those pills if Evy hadn’t sent Vaughn.
I needed to stop shying away from that shameful memory.
How could I expect to move on, to start living and truly enjoying this second chance with my twin, if I didn’t face my mistakes?
No matter what I did, no matter how much I pretended I was healing, nothing would actually stay healed if I didn’t face my past instead of hiding from it.
That was why William’s voice continued to haunt me. I was still allowing him to have that power over me because I wasn’t brave enough to face the most vulnerable parts of myself.
It was time to stop hiding, stop pretending.
“No. I know I wouldn’t be alive. You saved me when nothing else could. Without you, there is no me.”
“Evie—”
“I see it, Evy. You try to hide it to protect me, but I can see how broken you are. All of this—the move, the school, even the job—you did it all to help me heal. But not once have you done anything to help yourself. And now look what happened! You had a panic attack so bad that you passed out.”
“I’m okay,” she whispered, shrinking back even more, not expecting me to unleash on her.
Guilt choked me. “I won’t break if you admit that you’re not okay. What will destroy me is if I lose you.”
Her eyes flooded with tears. “As long as I have you, nothing else matters.”
There. I could see it now, right below the surface—fear.
It was in her voice, flashing in her eyes, consuming her.
She was scared of losing me, not to William this time.
She was afraid of losing me to myself. Which was valid.
I had that same fear, but as long as I had my sister, the darkness didn’t hold nearly as much power.
“You will always have me,” I promised, giving her fingers a squeeze. “Maybe moving here was a mistake. We can pack one of the Jeeps with the bare necessities and drive around until we find a place that feels right.”
“What? No!” Panic laced her voice, flashing in her eyes as she sat upright in bed.
“We are where we were meant to be. Creswell Springs is home. I feel it right here, with my whole heart.” Lifting our linked hands, she pressed them to the center of her chest. “I already see the change in you. This town is magical. You’re getting better every day. ”
She still didn’t understand and was too blind to how amazing she was to see the truth.
“I’m healing because of you, Evy, not some stupid town.
Being beside you is what is helping me. Each day I can wake up and touch you, I get another small piece of my soul back.
That’s the magic. Not the place, but you. ”
“I don’t want to leave.”