Blair
Sitting in a chair off to the side of the dance floor, my body sways naturally to the melody of a slow country song—“I Cross My Heart” by George Strait. With Hazel tucked in my arms, a heavy warmth on my chest, I swallow down the emotions bubbling within me. Couples move around the wooden dance floor in the center of the tent, lost in the music and each other.
I guess I’m lost, too, because I don’t notice Denver until he’s settling in next to me. “I don’t think any of you understand what low-key means. There is nothing casual about a fucking make-your-own-sundae bar.”
“The flower girl is very demanding, and her Uncle Austin has a hard time saying no.”
He holds a white bowl in front of my face, backdropped by the cutest dimpled grin I’ve ever seen, and I start questioning if it’s too much to tell him I love him because of some ice cream.
“ But the upside is you can have your senior citizen ice cream. Now”—he digs around in the bowl with the spoon, getting the perfect scoop—“for some ungodly reason, they don’t have Neapolitan. Something to fix for our wedding, clearly. Um, but I got all three flavors separately, and topped it with walnuts.”
Our wedding. He breezed past it as if we’re already engaged and actively planning a wedding. I half-expect to look down and see a ring magically appear on my finger.
He stares at me expectantly, holding the spoon in front of my face so I can do the taste test. I swallow, unable to stop a small moan in the back of my throat. “You’re the best. That is seriously good.”
Gesturing with his head to the sleeping baby in my arms, he says, “That looks good on you.”
The words might as well have been a semi truck crashing into me. I choke on my own spit, frantically reaching for a glass of water left over from dinner.
“Now you sound like my grandma anytime I’m around small children. Talk about a demanding woman.”
“She just wants a grandchild before she dies.”
“Jonas doesn’t count?” I rock Hazel gently, tucking her thin receiving blanket over her feet. While the day was hot, it cooled off quickly post-sunset.
“Nope. Nothing like that ever counts until the oldest sibling does it.” He shrugs impishly. “Sorry about your luck—looks like you’re having a baby because I know you can’t say no to Grandma Dorothy.”
“Considering I haven’t had a long-term relationship in over a decade, it’s insane she still has hope.”
“Not a single one?” He looks at me like I just informed him that I’ve recently grown a tail.
“Never. Not since you.”
“Me neither.”
I snort. “Yeah, I’m well aware, thanks. People love telling me about the parade of women in your life.”
“Bear, I can’t take back the fact that I was with other people, and I’m sorry you heard all about it. But before my bronc ride, I thought I saw you near the chutes. And everything— everyone —else stopped mattering at that moment.” He shuffles his chair closer so our thighs are touching. “That’s all I can offer you. The promise that I was completely yours from the second you stepped back into my life. Can that be enough for you?”
I think for a second, looking down at Hazel, then out at the dance floor. It’s not fair to judge Denver for whatever he did while we were apart, especially when I wasn’t exactly running a nunnery. But jealousy is a fucking bitch. With a hard swallow, I kick the green-tinged emotion from the back of my brain to the curb.
“It’s enough.” I reach out and pat the top of his thigh, over the spot where his tattoo is. “It’s enough, Den. Do you ever think about how things could’ve turned out if I hadn’t left?”
“Every day of my life,” he admits quietly. “The house we’d have, how good it would feel to come home to you every day, our kids.”
With a slow musing nod, I smooth a hand over Hazel’s soft red hair. “We could have a thirteen-year-old right now. That’s wild to think about.”
I haven’t let myself dwell on that piece of history in a long time. It brings a rush of pain, and longing, and self-loathing— saudade. And my eyes burn when I stare down at the sweet baby in my arms, then over at the man who would’ve made an amazing father, had I given him the chance.
He runs the thumb of his free hand across Hazel’s cheek. “I think about that the most.”
Cassidy comes traipsing toward us, fanning herself with her hands, and Red’s hot on her heels. She bends to pick up her peaceful baby from my arms and stops short, clearly noticing the glassiness in my eyes.
“You okay?” she says under her breath, quiet enough the guys can’t hear, while sliding a hand under Hazel’s head.
“Yeah, we were just reminiscing, and I’ve had too much wine.” I half-smile, blinking back the tears and plucking dress fabric away from where it’s clung to my stomach. “Denver? Do you want to dance with me?”
Wasting no time, he jumps to his feet and takes hold of my hand, leading me to the center of the dance floor. My arms loop lazily around his neck, and he holds tight to my waist, a hand splayed over my lower back. He motions something to the DJ, and mid-chorus, the song’s cut short, replaced by a beat I don’t recognize at first.
But when it hits me, I give Denver a look. “You didn’t ask for my favorite karaoke song because you wanted to get to know me, did you?”
He laughs. “ Maybe Cecily and Austin were talking about a wedding playlist in the kitchen, and I offered up a suggestion. Come on, Fancy. Sing it. Don’t let me down. ”
Shaking my head, I start singing quietly, only to him. And he beams at me.
“If I close my eyes, it’s like Reba is right here in front of me.”
“I hate you. You know that, right?” I tease.
“You don’t hate me. In fact, I bet you think I’m the best catch here, and you’re trying to think up a way to ask if you can have my babies, because they’d be top-tier children.”
With a laugh, I twirl around in his arms. “That would make Grandma Dorothy happy.”
“You’re in luck, because I hate disappointing grandmothers,” he says, fitting my body against his again. “But you know what’s great about us not having those kids yet?”
My mind gets entirely hung up on the way he talks about a wedding and kids with so much confidence, like they’re simply an inevitability. And after years of thinking I’d forever be Auntie , stuck in an “always the bridesmaid, never the bride” situation, there’s comfort in how sure he is about us. Lost in the way his words calm fears I’ve never had the courage to say aloud, I’m not even the slightest bit tempted to remind him we’re supposed to be taking things slow. We both know we never really were, anyway.
I twist my fingers around the hair on the back of his head. “The ability to sleep in? Not spending all our money on diapers and extra food? No fear about raising humans in this fucked-up world?”
“Tonight we’re staying in a cabin here, and we don’t have to worry about being quiet or sneaking around.” His fingers clench around the dress fabric just above my tailbone, and suddenly this thin slip of a dress is too much between us. His lips brush my ear, hot breath blowing against the goosebumps scattering up my neck. “I’m going to rip this fucking dress off and make you come again and again. You’ll be begging me to ease up, and I still won’t stop. I’ve had fourteen years to think about what I’d do to you if I had another chance. And tonight you’re mine, baby. All mine.”
“Is that a threat or a promise?”
“Whichever turns you on more.”
I press my pelvis into his, tempted to tell him we should ditch this party early. Finding myself so lost in the depths of his eyes, I can’t hear the music anymore. I don’t care that everyone is around, or that I told him we needed to take things day by day. We might not be the same kids we used to be, with a few smile lines around our eyes, and even a gray hair or two, but he’s still my Denver Wells.
And I kiss him with the intent of never letting him go again. His tongue brushes mine, our bodies still in the middle of the floor while everyone flows in slow motion around us. When my lips break away from his, the backs of his fingertips brush a wispy strand of hair off my cheek.
He looks like he’s about to say something, searching for the words as his eyes search mine. But something tugs him away from me, and a tiny voice brings us crashing back to reality.
“Uncle Denny, it’s our song,” Odessa yells over the opening notes to “I Gotta Feeling.” She’s practically vibrating— likely from overindulging in ice cream—and her white and pink flower girl dress swishes around her legs. With hair a frizzy mess and sweat beaded on her hairline from dancing, she holds out a hand for him to grab with a wild look in her eye.
“Sorry, baby, there’s a super cute girl asking me to dance. I can’t turn her down—you know how it is.” He winks, running his hand from my back to my waist, struggling to tear his touch from my body.
“I knew it was only a matter of time before a prettier girl grabbed your attention. Hopefully it doesn’t come to this, but I’m prepared to fight a literal child, if I have to.”
“I never pegged you for the jealous type when we were younger, but I like it.” He kisses my cheek. “One— maybe two —dances, and you’ll get me all to yourself again.”
“I’ll be waiting with drinks.” I feel the loss of his touch everywhere the second I pull back, and I nearly trip over myself walking backward off the dance floor. Because watching Denver twirl his niece around, laughing and goofing off, is simultaneously the hottest and most gut-wrenching thing I’ve ever experienced.
I don’t take my eyes off them for the entire trip to the bar and order our drinks while keeping tabs in my periphery. My time back in Wells Canyon has been a continual reminder of all the things I could’ve had. From trips to the ice cream shop to the time spent with Mom. Weddings and babies and building a life with him.
“I was looking for you.” Cassidy leans an elbow on the bar—Hazel, now wide awake, is nestled in the other, chewing on her tiny hands. “They’re about to wind things down here, and some of us are going to have drinks and a fire, if you’re in. Chase and Colt went to set it up.”
“Is it bad if we don’t come because I kind of want to jump his bones right now instead?” I motion toward where Denver has Odessa on his hip, and they’re spinning in fast, stumbling circles while she throws her head back laughing.
“Honestly, that’s fair. Careful, though. Baby fever is a hell of a drug. I’ve come close to trashing my birth control a few times because Chase looks so hot holding Hazel.” She cracks open her water bottle and takes a sip while watching them with me. “So you two aren’t taking it slow, I assume?”
“We’re kind of…picking back up where we left off. Like time stood still for the last decade.”
“But it didn’t.”
“That’s okay. Time stopped in the ways that matter. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll probably have some jealousy flare-ups when girls he’s slept with flirt with him. But I’d be an idiot if I pushed him away—or into the arms of somebody else—because I couldn’t admit to myself that I still love him.”
“Wow, what’s it like to have all your feelings so well sorted out?” Cassidy laughs.
“I wouldn’t say well sorted, but at least I’m not going to say ‘thank you’ if he decides to drop the L-bomb on me.”
“ Ouch. That’s a cheap shot. I retract my invite to the fire, asshole.”
“ As if. ” I blow her a kiss. “Your reverse psychology worked. We’ll be there shortly.”
Spinning on her heel, Cass turns to leave. “I promise not to judge when you two sneak away after fifteen minutes.”
I grab our drinks and find a seat with a good view of Denver and Odessa. Spinning, laughing, and busting out their silliest moves in a freestyle dance-off. Sipping the chardonnay does nothing to ease the burning in my core. Instead, my head’s floating, warm and fizzing like I’m submerged in a hot tub. Sinking deeper into the chair, I cross my legs to fight the need for him.
As the last song of the night draws to a close, Denver indulges Odessa in one final twirl before scooting her toward her dad’s waiting arms. Then he saunters over to me, dimples catching the twinkling ceiling lights, wiping sweat from his forehead.
“Quite the moves you’ve got there.” I hand him his beer bottle, watching the muscles in his neck as he takes a pull.
“It was all those hours practicing when we were younger. I’m basically the best dancer in town now.” His fingers find their way to my thigh, absentmindedly toying with the silky fabric of my dress. It’s the way touching me seems to be his natural instinct anytime we’re together. A constant need that I pray never fades—his hands belong on my body every moment of every day.
“There’s a fire set up outside. I told Cass we’d go.” Finishing off my glass, I stand up, nearly changing my mind about the fire when his palm slides across my ass, stopping for a quick pat on the cheek before finding a home on my hip.
And that’s how we walk across the tent, weaving through the last remaining party guests. Denver stops off at the bar, grabbing two bottles of beer and an open bottle of wine.
Our hips bump into each other at random while walking down the gravel road to where a propane firepit is flickering. Thanks to the dry summer weather, we’re not allowed real fires, but this works as a good substitute for the ambience. Denver plops into an oversized cushioned lawn chair and tugs me by the waist so I fall into his lap with a startled gasp. Within seconds, I’m conformed to the memory foam of his body like I never left. Cuddled in his arms, my legs slung over his, and the thumb of his free hand lightly stroking my upper arm. Giving up on the wineglass, I sip straight from the dark bottle and stare at the amber fire glow.
By the time Kate and Jackson join us about five minutes later, we’re a group of twelve—including a few ranch hands and a handful of Wells cousins. Kate sits down with a mischievous smile, holding up a bottle of Fireball in triumph.
“I have liquor, no children to be responsible for tonight, and my bed is within walking distance. I’m ready.” She cracks the bottle, still held up in the air, and chugs the most Fireball I’ve ever witnessed a single person consume in one go.
Jackson finally snatches it from her hand, shaking his head with a laugh, and Denny releases his hold on my arm for just long enough to whistle enthusiastically at her. Then Jackson takes a much more acceptable drink from the bottle before passing it along to Colt. Slowly, it works through Denver’s cousins, skips Cass and Red, and ends up in my hands.
“Oh God. I don’t think you guys want me drinking this. Things will get weird in a hurry.”
“Oh, just do it!” Kate shouts, then quickly mouths “sorry” when Red points out the sleeping baby in the stroller next to him.
I lock eyes with Denver, who raises a daring brow. “Maybe don’t drink quite as much as Kate.”
“I would be lying facedown in the dirt if I did.” I press the rim to my mouth, and it clinks against my teeth accidentally when I take the smallest sip possible.
The cinnamon-flavored liquid burns down my throat, and I wince while handing it off to Denver.
“We should play a game.” Kate claps her hands together, waiting anxiously for the Fireball to be passed back to her.
“Oh, Cassidy loves Seven Minutes in Heaven,” Red quips.
She smacks him on the chest, mouth agape, and he coughs dramatically like she knocked the wind out of him.
“Way to throw me under the bus at your first opportunity,” she says.
Denver tosses his hands up in the air. “Every girl here is taken, so how exactly would that work, anyway? I didn’t think this was that kind of party.”
Every girl here is taken. With a relaxed exhale, I melt into him.
“Never have I ever,” Kate suggests. “I’ll go first. Never have I ever…had sex in that barn.” Her finger sloppily points in the direction of the large white barn…a place Denver and I spent many hours in as teens.
He and I both drink without question until I lower my bottle and find everybody staring. Kate gives us a slow clap, elbowing Jackson.
Clearing my throat, I clarify, “Not recently, for the record. At least…not for me.”
“Not for me either,” Denver whispers into my hair. “Although…for old times’ sake.”
Jackson thinks for a second, staring at Denver with the look of somebody prepared to spill every secret about his brother. “Okay…never have I ever had sex in a stock trailer.”
I turn to Denver and gasp. “ You told him that? ”
He stares at me like a deer in the headlights, slowly raising his beer to his lips. His free hand nudges the bottom of my wine, telling me to drink.
Red’s howling laugh carries around the fire. “Where haven’t you two done it?”
Licking a droplet of wine from my top lip, I turn to him. “We were teenagers trying to get it on whenever we had the opportunity. It led to some creative choices.”
“Okay, okay, okay. If you two have done this, I have some serious questions.” Colt leans forward in his seat, ready to drop a doozy. “Never have I ever had a threesome.”
A reminder of fourteen years apart crashes into my chest when Denver sheepishly takes a drink. For a second, I quit breathing; staring at him, I’m willing myself not to cry. Because that’s stupid. This is a game. We only just got back together— if we’re even technically together? Everyone else is laughing, but his eyes meet mine with a shameful glance, and I find his hand to give it a squeeze.
It’s fine.
Thankfully, the moment is saved by Cassidy’s shriek when Red tries to discreetly turn to the side and take a drink.
“Oh. My. God.” She cackles, then points between Denver and Red. “Wait… together ?”
“Okay, I’m starting to really feel targeted by this game,” Denver says with a groan.
Next to me, Cassidy pokes Red in the stomach. “Oh, you’re so telling me all the details about this later. I can’t wait.”
He responds by choking on his drink. “Can we play a different game? Please. ”
“Was there sword crossing?” Colt asks casually, touching the tips of his index fingers together. The entire group busts out laughing, and both guys nearly jump out of their seats with a synchronized, resounding no. Colt puts his hands up in surrender. “Okay, okay. Just thought maybe things got a little extra freaky.”
We’re all quiet, trying to work out the last of the giggles, when Colt raises a hand—presumably because he has another question—then steeples his fingers in front of his mouth. He’s way too deep in thought for one a.m. and a dozen beers in. “Eiffel Tower, then?”
“ Jesus Christ, Colt, ” Denver yells, massaging his temple.
“Okay, you’re all getting weird. I’m heading to bed.” Jackson’s face is scrunched in disgust as he stands. Kate—who seems rather intrigued by the entire conversation—reluctantly takes his hand and follows.
“Yeah, same.” I fake a yawn. I’m not actually all that tired, and I’m only half done with my wine. But the thought of trying to stomach any new information about Denver’s sex life is making the Fireball slosh around a bit more than I’d like.
Denver’s quick to follow, linking our hands silently as we start up the moonlit path. The bonfire party becomes quieter with each footstep until our friends’ voices are overshadowed by cricket chatter. The night air is still and Denver’s grip on me is steady.
“I’m not mad at you. It’s hard to hear or think about sometimes, but that’s on me.” I glance over at the twitching muscle in his jaw. “Won’t lie—part of me wants to know how the hell you ended up in bed with Red.”
“I’d rather be dead than in bed with Red.” A goofy grin cracks his tired expression when he catches the way his sentence rhymed. “That’s the start of Dr. Seuss’s new explicit sequel to Hop on Pop, in case you were wondering.”
My cheeks burn with the need to laugh, and a squeaky noise resembling an unoiled door hinge slips between my lips. Denver pokes me, and a full-on guffaw escapes as I double over.
Gasping for breath, I look up at him. “You’re the biggest dork I’ve ever met. God, I love you.”
Not leaving room for me to clarify or backtrack, his mouth crashes into mine with unbridled lust. His hands slide to my lower back, pulling me close enough the pulsing between my thighs presses against the bulge in his jeans. And I frantically kiss him back, taking everything I’ve needed all night. Everything I’ve needed for fourteen years.
His tongue tangles around mine, hands raking through my hair to mess up the loose curls, and my hips meet his in desperation. I want him to fuck me right here in the middle of the driveway.
“ Fuck, ” he mumbles into my mouth, his voice drowned out by my moan as I feel him cup my pussy through the thin dress fabric.
“I need you inside me. Right fucking now.”