Chapter Fifteen
Cancer?” Liz said loudly. “Are you serious?”
I had to give my mom credit. Despite her reluctance, when the time came, she was direct.
“Wait.” Anne spun to face me. After eating the burgers, we’d moved outside so the sisters could talk at the table privately, but of course it was anything but. “Cat’s sick?”
Ben, who had been strumming the guitar, suddenly stopped. Which made it seem even quieter as I said, “Yes.”
Lana whistled, low. “Yowza.”
“This is awful!” Anne turned to me, taking one of my hands. “You must be so worried, Finley.”
I nodded, wondering if this was another reason I’d been so insistent about her not carrying this news alone. So that I wouldn’t have to either.
“Is this why you came all of a sudden?” Liz asked now. “I was so annoyed with you! If I’d known—”
“—it would have eclipsed everything and we’d never have accomplished what we have,” my mom finished for her.
“Or,” Kasey said quietly, “we could have supported you while better understanding the situation.”
“I can’t believe you knew about this at Christmas!” Liz exclaimed. “How could you just ignore it? You know breast cancer runs on Mom’s side.”
It did?
“Liz, stop,” Kasey said. “Let her talk.”
As my mom explained further, I took a shaky breath, focusing on Ben’s hands and the easy way they moved over the strings as he started to play again. Chords. Strumming. Melody.
“At least you two have each other,” Anne said to me after a moment. On cue, Jonathan, who was sitting beside her, slid an arm over her shoulders. “Support is really important with a diagnosis like this.”
“Telling me wasn’t her choice,” I told her. “I saw some papers.”
Ben looked up at me. “Wait. So you didn’t know either?”
“Not until we got here,” I said as Anne squeezed my hand. “She’s never shared much of herself with me, though. That’s always been our dynamic. Now that I do know something, I hate that it’s this.”
On the porch, the conversation was still going. “So you’re leaving tomorrow,” I heard Kasey say.
“For tests and to meet with the surgeon,” my mom said. “I’ll come back after to wrap things up here and do all the stuff with the notary.”
“What about Finley?” Liz asked.
It was like a jolt, hearing my name.
“I’m dropping her off on the way,” my mom said. “She can get back to her summer, which is the best thing for both of us.”
Again, Anne turned to face me. “You’re leaving tomorrow? You just got here!”
“I wasn’t supposed to come in the first place,” I pointed out.
“But you did. You can’t just vanish on us again. That’s not fair.”
“We’re talking about cancer,” Lana informed her. “Fair doesn’t come into it.”
“You’re right.” Anne flushed. “I’m being selfish. It’s just at times like this, when things get so hard, it feels like we should be bringing family closer. Not pushing them away.”
“Depends on the family,” Lana said quietly.
Things were wrapping up now inside. I heard chairs scraping, final words. Then Kasey was coming out the door.
“Oh, Finley. Your mom just told us her news.” She bent down, giving me a hug. Liz, behind her, was looking at me as well. “I know it’s a lot. If you need to talk, I’m here for you. Anytime.”
“Me too,” Liz added. She gave me a tight smile. “And we’ll get through this. Don’t worry.”
I wondered if things were reversed, my mom now listening to us. I could only imagine what she’d make of that “we.” I nodded.
“All right.” Kasey started down the stairs. “I’m going to bed. I’ll see you all at the Egg in the morning. Finley, be sure to come grab some breakfast for you and your mom on the way out.”
“I will,” I told her. “Thanks.”
As she slid her hands in the pockets, crossing the driveway, Liz yawned. “What a day. I’m exhausted. Hopefully tomorrow will be less dramatic.”
“What time are they starting?” Anne asked her.
“The truck is coming at eight sharp.”
“Which means they’ll be stuck in a hole at five of,” Lana predicted.
“Let’s hope not.” Liz stepped closer, pulling me in for a hug. “Love you, honey. I’m crossing my fingers you and Cat will come back for the wedding.”
“I’m invited?” I asked. It hadn’t even occurred to me.
“Of course!” Anne gave me one of her trademark squeezes. For such a thin person, she had serious grip. “In fact, I’m counting on it.”
I stood there, watching as they headed to their respective cars. Liz beeped as she followed the 4Runner into the trees.
A breeze blew over the water, unexpectedly cool, and I closed my eyes. When I opened them, Lana had gone down the steps and out to where the grass jutted over the water. She stretched her arms over her head, as she had that day at the Egg, then held them there, hands clasped.
“She’s going to miss you,” Ben observed. He was looking at her as well.
“You think?”
“Yup. No way you’d know this, but female friends aren’t exactly her strong suit.” He bent over the guitar, his hair falling across his face. “You made it look easy, though.”
“I just let her boss me around,” I pointed out.
“I think there’s more to it than that,” he said. “Anyway, I’m bummed you’re going too. You weren’t even here long enough to use any of that toothpaste.”
I sighed. “Much less put it in a cabinet.”
“At least we have our shared memories,” he told me. “Oh, and when you’re talking about them, be sure to make me sound super confident and more attractive. I mean, if it’s not too hard.”
In truth, I liked him just the way he was. But this felt like too much to say out loud. “I’ll do my best,” I told him instead.
“Good.” He smiled. “And look… whatever happens when you get home, with the breakup, at least… I hope it’s what you want.”
“Thanks.” I sighed. “Although honestly, I’m not even sure what that is right now.”
“Finley?”
I turned: My mom was in the doorway. “Yeah?”
“Can you come inside?”
I looked at Ben, still bent over the guitar. “Sure. I’ll be there in a sec.”
I didn’t go right away. At first, I was again only watching him play, focused on the movement of his hands.
Then, though, the notes arranged themselves into something I recognized.
It was a Dolly Parton song I’d heard at the Egg, about clear blue mornings and things turning out okay.
Not the biggest detail or deal. Still, it was nice to know one thing for sure.