Chapter 7
CHAPTER SEVEN
VAN
The scent of another alpha will always make my wolves’ hackles rise, though I do my best not to show it. The air around Benji’s small rental — a bach one road back from the beach — is thick with the stink of him, and I suppress the urge to growl.
As he steps out into his yard, it’s clear that he’s having the same reaction.
“Van,” he snarls, radiating aggression. He may be young, but Ellie was right. When I first employed him at Lost Moon he was a lanky teenager, but now he looks like an alpha.
It’s hard not to respond to him in kind.
“Benjamin.”
“What do you want? ‘Cause it’s gotta be something for you to show up here, right?”
Keep it short, I remind myself. Don’t take his bait. I haven’t put up with him living on this island for the past two years just fuck this up now. “I want you to join the pack, officially.”
He barks out a laugh that drips with sarcasm. “Are you fuckin’ kidding me?”
“No.”
“You want me to join the pack under you?” he asks, his Australian accent thicker than usual.
The resemblance to Brett is uncanny, but his personality — at least around me — is vastly different from the relaxed man that his uncle is.
“Are you fuckin’ insane? What is your wolf telling you right now?
I doubt it’s hey mate, that’s a great idea.
Are you trying to get yourself killed? Do I need to call a fuckin’ helpline for you? ”
“That’s cute that you think you could win in a fight against me.” The words are out before I can stop them, my tone sounding too much like my own father — arrogant to the point of being an asshole.
Benji gives another bitter laugh. “You’re a fuckin’ cunt.”
I force myself to count to ten, and then I keep counting, because neither of my wolves are being quiet right now, and it’s taking a hell of a lot of self-control to not shift. Minutes go by without either of us saying a word, until finally Benji cracks.
“Why do you want me?” He’s calmer than before. “I was under the impression that for a small pack, it’s stacked when it comes to enforcers.”
“It is. I don’t need another enforcer, but that’s what you’ll be, obviously.
You’ve met my father.” I wait for Benji to nod before continuing.
“You know he’s an alpha. I don’t think I need to explain to you what that meant for me, once I turned thirteen.
You left your old pack for a reason, after all. ”
Another nod.
“When my mother was pregnant with me, a pixie supposedly cursed my father and his firstborn child.” I shrug reflexively. “It sounds ridiculous when I say it, but their magic is fae-based. As I’m sure you’re aware, so is my mate’s magic.”
“Yeah. Are you saying that the curse was you being an alpha?”
“It feels like a curse.”
“And yet you’re asking me to join your pack so you can feel the same way again. That’s…” He makes an unpleasant face. “I don’t want to be in conflict every day of my fuckin’ life. It’s bad enough as it is, with you declaring the whole island your fuckin’ territory.”
“I understand the reluctance.”
“So what am I missing here?”
He may be an employee, but I’ve personally avoided him for the past year. Ellie and my staff have handled every interaction with him, and I hadn’t realised just how bold he’d become.
“That the pixie cursed me, specifically, in addition to my father. That I’m aware there’s a possibility that given that fact, the curse may continue with a future generation.
I would like to avoid that. There are only ever one or two alphas in a pack at any one time.
I need a placeholder alpha until my children are born. ”
“That’s a lot of ifs and whens and maybes. Is she pregnant?”
“Not yet. Would you risk it, knowing what you know?”
“Fuck no. Nah, I don’t envy you, that’s for sure.” He looks me up and down, yellow eyes assessing. “My wolf doesn’t like you as it is.”
“Believe me, I know.”
“So what’s in it for me, then? What’s my incentive for not killing your arse and taking over your pack?”
“I mean, the incentive to not attempt to murder me would be avoiding a prison sentence, right? Now that we’re in this post-Unravelling world, things are harder to cover up.
A wealthy businessman disappearing into thin air is going to make the news whether you like it or not.
I keep aspects of my pack private, but our presence on this island is well-known for that very reason; it’s an insurance policy for my wolves here against those that might seek to harm us. ”
He’s restless; I can see it in the set of his shoulders. “I get it, you’re rich. Just give me the fuckin’ dollar amount.”
“Five hundred thousand per year, paid annually on the completion of each year with the pack. Say yes today and I’ll arrange a payment of an additional hundred grand this week to start off with in good faith.”
“Nah. Inflation’s a bitch. Double it, and then throw in a severance package, for when you decide you’re done knocking your missus up. An extra five million at the end of this job for me to not take the pack out from under you. And just to be clear, we’re talking US dollars here.”
I have no clue where this kid learned about severance pay. “No, we’re not. New Zealand dollars only.”
“I’m not making my life a shit show for half a mil a year. That’s not worth it.”
I hold back my comment about the fact that he currently earns seventy grand working at Lost Moon, and that’s higher than what any other local businesses pay for his role. “A million NZD per year, then. One hundred thousand additional dollars today. Two million on completion of our contract.”
“Four million on completion. And you pay me every six months.”
“Three million on completion, with the stipulation that you leave Motuwai once we’re done. Five hundred thousand paid every six months. A hundred thousand today. That’s my final offer.”
“You could be doing this all for nothing.”
“I know.”
“And I’m going to quit my job.”
“That’s fine,” I reply, unable to keep the ironic laugh out of my voice. This is such a fucked up situation, but everything in my gut tells me it’s the right thing to do despite my shifter wolf hating it. “The less I have to see of you, the better for the both of us.”
“This is fuckin’ nuts.”
“Just think of the money.” I extend my hand to him. “Deal?”
“Deal.”
He still has a grip on my hand when it happens, faster than I anticipated, my wolves growling in warning as this young alpha takes the lead on a process I should be controlling.
He accepts me as his alpha, though the moment his presence settles in my mind it is unequivocally unsettled, a seething, violent anger aimed directly at me.
I growl in warning and so does he, daring to step even closer, ignoring the fact that I have a couple of inches and at least fifty pounds on him as he gets up in my face, lips pulling back in a snarl.
I catch his fist before he can land his punch and shove him backwards against the house, acting on instinct as I get my forearm across his throat.
“Don’t fucking try me!” I growl with the full weight of my alpha bark. “I am your alpha. You will obey me. Stand down!”
The yelp of pain from his wolf is loud enough to sense through the bond, the impact of my words draining the fight out of him instantly.
I’ve still got him trapped by the throat, his breath rasping as I snarl in his face, my teeth bared in warning.
Kill him, my wolf urges, stronger than I’ve ever felt before. Kill him now.
No. Now fuck off, I bite back.
“You will not attack me,” I growl, every word still a barking command, and in my head I still hear the voice of my father saying the same damned thing, barking in my face, his hand around my neck as he pressed me against the wall in our home.
I’d been sixteen at the time — angry, bitter, and close to his height — and had landed a punch to his face out of nowhere.
“Not now, not ever. Your job is to protect the pack, including my mate. Your goal is to uphold the agreement we have, understand?”
“Yes, alpha,” he bites out through gritted teeth, playing tough despite the fact that I have his complete submission.
“Good. We both want to survive this,” I say with a final shove, echoing my father’s words. “We’re going to.”
I leave immediately, my hands shaking with adrenaline as I climb into my car. They’re still shaking five minutes later as I pull into the next bay along the coastline, hastily parking on the bank above the beach and throwing my door open so I can puke on the grass.
“Fuck,” I groan, spitting one final time before closing the door and leaning back in my seat, breathing heavily. My phone is blowing up with questions from the rest of the pack — they can sense when others join us — and I switch it to silent, ignoring all the notifications apart from Ellie’s quick,
You okay?
Fine, it’s done. Be home soon.
I should keep driving, but instead I stare out at the ocean — it’s a dreary autumn day and the sun is close to setting, making the water appear grey-green — and dial the number of the one person who understands. It’s late in California, but he picks up on the third ring.
“Evander.”
The back of my throat burns, and I fear it’s not just from throwing up. I open my mouth, but struggle to find the words.
“Evander? What’s wrong?”
“How did you do it?” I ask. “How did you not kill me in all that time?”
There’s a long pause before he answers. “Because you’re my son, and I still loved you, regardless of what my wolf said.”
“Well fuck,” I say letting out a bitter laugh that sounds more like a sob, the view of the ocean blurring in front of me. “That’s no fucking help to me.”
“What happened? Has an alpha been born into your pack already?”
“No.” I hesitate, suddenly regretting my impulsive decision to call him. He’s never failed to criticise me, though in the past two years we’ve both been making an effort to fix things between us.
“What’s happened, Van?”
He hasn’t called me by my nickname since I was a child. That, combined with his gentler tone, is the straw that breaks the camel’s back. I swipe at the tears on my cheeks, taking a few moments to compose myself, knowing that he’ll be able to hear this all through the phone.
“You’re going to think I’m crazy,” I say once I have enough control over my voice. “But I have a good reason. I had Benji join the pack.”
“That alpha kid.”
“Yeah.”
“Why?” There’s that usual judgement I get from him. I don’t have the energy to even be triggered by it, this time. I close my eyes, my head tipped back against my seat’s headrest. I’m so sick of having to explain this.
“Because there’s only two alphas in a pack, and I don’t want the next one to be my own kid.”
His quiet “Fuck,” is barely audible through the phone.
“I don’t need to hear how much I’ve fucked up.”
“I wasn’t going to tell you that. I’m surprised. I’ve been wondering why the hell you would put up with that fucking kid for so long, now it makes sense. Is she pregnant, then?”
“Ellie? No. Not yet. I didn’t want there to be any risk at all of history repeating itself. I couldn’t think of another way.”
“And you’re asking me how I didn’t kill you.” His chuckle is a deep rumble through the phone. This is his kind of humour, after all.
“I feel like a monster,” I admit.
“Don’t.” His voice is stern, decisive. “We are the way we are by nature.”
I think back to the moment I had Benji up against the wall, my wolf snarling in my head. “I’ve never felt that level of aggression before today. I thought I would be able to get through it given how you and I dealt with it for so long. Now I’m not so sure.”
“You used your bark on him?”
“Of course.”
“That will help. There’s usually an incident before things come to a head. I doubt he will attack you if you avoid confrontation as much as possible. How much did you pay him?”
I shake my head. I don’t expect anything else than for my father to be thinking two steps ahead.
“A million a year, NZD. Another three when it ends, if he goes quietly.”
“That’s a bargain, given what it’s for.” He’s being serious.
“You couldn’t pay me enough to deal with it, if I had the choice.
” He’s silent for a moment. ”Your replacement arrived just last month.
I knew it was happening as soon as Alex went into labour unexpectedly in the middle of a pack meeting.
Out came an alpha — a girl. So I have thirteen years to enjoy my peace before the shit storm starts for me all over again. ”
“I’m sorry.”
“It is what it is. And as long as it’s not my kid, I don’t care. I’ll force the family out of the pack when the time comes, and then the process will start again. Another alpha will need to be born.”
“The pack’s never getting rid of you, huh?”
“Only over my dead body. And you know your mother would have something to say about that, too.”
I take a deep breath, exhaling slowly. We’re both quiet for a moment.
“Do you remember your thirteenth birthday?” Dad asks.
Thirteen candles on an ice cream cake, the scent of the ocean and summer and sunscreen drifting through the open windows.
Lacey telling me to make a wish, Seth bouncing in his seat, and Mom’s stricken face.
Ellie, only nine at the time, looking confused as I blew out the candles through tears, knowing full-well that my wish would never come true.
Dad pulling me outside and into his arms, both of us holding on for dear life.
A promise whispered into the top of my head. “I won’t stop loving you, Son. No matter what our wolves do. You’ll still be my boy.”
“Yeah,” I answer.
“I know it didn’t seem like I kept my promise, but I want you to know that I did.”
“I know, Dad. I always knew.”
Ellie is waiting for me when I return home, relief clear in her brown eyes. She takes me by the hand and leads me to the couch. Exhausted, I lay my head in her lap. She strokes my hair and whispers, “I’m proud of you,” in benediction.