Chapter 22
TWENTY-TWO
The brisk wind was causing Queen Maedbh to smack up and down on the waves as Joey made their way across to the mainland.
They tried to empty their head of any thoughts not essential to a safe crossing and lap up the elements surrounding them. The crash of the waves and the roar of the wind almost drowned out the alien sound of the boat’s engine. It was just Joey out here, surrounded by the power of nature.
But an annoying current of thought kept swirling around their mind. And the subject of that thought had a crop of copper hair that framed her beautiful heart-shaped face. Joey just couldn’t stop thinking about Marianne, no matter how hard they tried. Now they had to go see Doctor Scott, their GP for most of their life, who probably knew more about them than anyone else. It didn’t help she was also the most astute person Joey knew.
They would get in there and out as quickly as possible and try not to engage in small talk.
Mooring up at the village quay, they tried to avoid the small group of mainland fishers congregating on the slipway.
“Joey.” Shane O’Dwyer waved them over.
So much for that idea.
“You delivering today?” One of the fishers offered Joey a cigarette and they shook their head.
“No, I’m off to see the doc.” They checked their watch. “I’d better be getting up there now.”
“When are you going to start selling to our distributor?”
“I’ve decided against it.” There, they’d said it now. “I’m extending my oyster beds, and I’ll fill the gap in the next couple of years by delivering my lobsters a little further afield.”
“Why? It’s so easy. They come down here in that big truck and take it all. No more begging at restaurant kitchen doors to take your lobsters.”
“And most of it goes straight off to Spain or France or beyond. I like that people can enjoy seafood so close to where it was caught.”
“Some of us can’t afford to be so choosy, Joey,” muttered one of the older fishers.
“I’m not telling you what to do, am I, Francie?” The men shuffled their feet as Joey said goodbye and strode up the hill from the quay.
Constance Scott ran her surgery from her sprawling, if ramshackle, house high on the hillside overlooking the harbor.
Joey opted for the cliff path rather than the longer but more gradual incline of the road. Halfway up, they turned to take in the view. The views across to Inishderry were worth the climb.
It was a clear day, and the sun glinted off the lighthouse at the entrance to the harbor. From this angle, it wasn’t possible to see into the harbor and the white shape of the Waterside, but Joey’s mind’s eye pictured it anyway, and then berated themself for wondering if Marianne was having a busy day.
They took the last climb at a punishing pace to rid their mind of confusing thoughts they did not want to discuss with their GP. Steep stone steps took them up the last few yards and they emerged onto a weed-covered stone courtyard, breathing heavily from the effort. At the imposing wooden door, its purple paint peeling, Joey took a moment to get their breath before they grasped the heart-shaped door knocker.
A noise from around the side of the house alerted them as Doc Scott appeared through some undergrowth, tripping on a bramble as she emerged. She caught hold of Joey’s elbow to steady herself.
“Bugger. I nearly broke my fucking neck.”
Joey had never met a medical professional who swore like Doc. But then the only GPs they’d ever known were Doc and her father, James, who had run the practice before her. The swearing was all the more shocking in a voice that betrayed a first-rate education.
“Are you well, Joey? You’re all puffed out. I saw you running up the hill.” She pulled out her pocket watch from a perfectly fitted tweed waistcoat. “Our appointment’s not until twelve, is it? It’s still only a quarter to.”
Joey rubbed the sweat off their face. “Sorry, I felt like I needed to burn off some energy. I overdid it a little.”
“Well, come on in and I’ll get you some water.” She turned and grinned. “Or something stronger?”
“It’s not even midday, and I need to work. Water would be good, thanks.”
Doc let out an exaggerated sigh. “I live such a lonely life, and you can’t even have a drink with me.”
Joey chuckled. “You’re so dramatic. I’ll come back and have a drink another time. If you’re so lonely, throw one of those big parties like you used to.” Doc’s social life had nosedived after her partner left her more than ten years ago. Joey had been saddened to watch her struggle to accept the change to her life. She’d ended up becoming a close friend to her ex, Majella, and her new wife, and even now, the only time Doc took a vacation was to go to England to visit them.
Doc led them into the kitchen and ran the tap in a cavernous Belfast sink. Everything in the kitchen was ancient, but fascinating. The Scott house would have been something in its prime. Joey took the glass and downed most of the contents while Doc wrestled with both hands to close the tap.
“Do you want me to come and look at that next week?” There were so many repairs required in the house they could spend a week fixing them.
“That would be delightful. But only if you’ve got time. I’ll pay you, of course.” She picked up a half-full bottle from the counter. “Or you can take your payment in good malt whiskey.” She waggled her eyebrows.
“I’ll be delivering to Galway on Tuesday. I’ll call in on my way back. It’ll be the end of the day.”
“Perfect. I’ll make us dinner.”
Despite knowing the entire population, and each and every ailment they possessed, Doc Scott had few real friends in the community. With Joey, they had an ability to skip between friendship and a doctor-patient relationship that was unusual, but it had never affected Joey’s belief in Doc as a medical professional. She’d earned their loyalty and absolute trust over the years.
Doc checked her antique timepiece again. “Right. Appointment time. Get your arse into my consult room before you’re late.”
Joey laughed and made their way to the wood-paneled door that led to the surgery.
“You’re my last patient before lunch. I sent Maura home.”
Joey dropped into a soft battered leather chair and Doc sat down the other side of the enormous desk.
“What can I do for you, Joey?” She rested her elbows on the marked, dark wood and steepled her fingers. Her interrogating gaze was what Joey had been hoping to avoid.
They shuffled against the leather.
“You told me to make an appointment. I assumed it was so you can grill me for gossip.”
Doc tapped her index fingers together. “You’re my good friend and I do love gossip. But you understand when we’re in this room I’m your GP and the closest you’ve got to a therapist?”
“I know. Sorry.” They had already foiled their plan to act normally by being overly defensive.
“And how are you?”
“Okay, good.” Joey couldn’t maintain the eye contact and glanced at the bookcase behind Doc’s head.
Damn. Act as if I’ve nothing to hide.
“You need to give me more if you don’t want me to keep digging.” Doc sat back; her hands still joined in a point.
“The summer season’s busy on the island as usual. There’s a lot of interaction. It’s tiring.”
“How have the shellfish safaris been going?”
“I haven’t done as many this year. Kasia thought she’d maybe pushed me into it a little, so she’s stepped back.”
“And had she? Pushed you?”
“No. But maybe I’m a little too keen to help out sometimes.” They might as well say the things Doc wanted to hear. They knew it was true.
“So, you’re not helping out at all?”
They looked up. “Oh, yeah, I do some boat trips. And I’m doing a few video clips with Marianne that will help the Waterside, too.”
Doc’s eyebrows shot up. “Marianne?”
Joey sighed. They were in no doubt Doc would know everything going on in Inishderry. She spent her evenings sitting at a table in the corner of the Harbor Bar pretending to be lost in her own thoughts, but eagerly soaking up every snippet of local gossip.
“Yes, Marianne Browne. You know who I’m talking about.”
“I do, but last time we spoke, she was a customer you had a thing for.”
“I didn’t ever tell you that.”
Doc threw her head back with a roar. “No, you didn’t have to. Anyway, so now she’s coincidentally living on your island. In your house at one point, I heard tell.”
Joey scratched their head. “What are you digging for? You’re supposed to be my GP.”
“You’re right, I’m a general practitioner, not a therapist. But I’m all you’ve got.”
Doc came around the desk and pulled up another chair alongside Joey. “I hate that desk. It’s so impersonal.” She crossed her hands in her lap. “So, talk to me. I don’t need every innermost thought, just a general idea of how you’re doing.”
Joey ran their hands through their hair and sighed.
“I bet you wish you’d taken me up on that whiskey now.”
Joey couldn’t help but laugh. Doc’s bedside manner was sometimes a little blunt, but she wasn’t as insensitive as she seemed. And she cared about them.
“I’ve felt less lonely. Busy’s good, you know? But I haven’t felt too pressured. Helping Marianne has helped me, I think.”
“And how are things with Marianne? Have you got close?”
“No. Yes. I guess.” They took a breath. “I kissed her a few weeks ago. It was a mistake.”
“Was it?”
“It felt like a disaster. I thought I’d invented the whole thing. I had a few bad days, but I swam, and I forced myself to get back to work.” They ran their damp palms across their knees. “And I eventually talked to Mari, and we’re all good.”
“Good, or ignoring how you feel?”
“We talked it through. It’s not right for either of us. She’s got to rebuild her life and it’s not going to be on Inishderry, is it?”
“I don’t know. I wasn’t party to the conversation.”
“You know who Marianne Browne is. What do you think?” Joey folded their arms.
“Is it all about her career? I heard she has a very young child in tow.”
“You hear a lot, don’t you? His name’s Denny and he’s the best kid ever.” Why did I have to say that?
“So, it’s not just the hot chef you’ve fallen for?”
“I haven’t fallen for anyone. Yes, Marianne is very attractive but she’s also a wonderful, kind, clever person. Being around her makes me happy. Ditto her kid. And even if I wanted to avoid them completely, I’d never be able to do that while they’re living in Inishderry. I’ll be okay.”
Doc stood and moved over to the laptop in the corner. Somewhere out of sight, a printer whirred into action and Doc reached under the counter.
“Here you go. In case you need it.” She slapped the slip of paper onto the desk. “Now we’ve covered the professional part, how about we go and get some lunch, and you can tell me more about Marianne? As a friend.”
Joey wasn’t sure how much talking about Marianne they wanted to do. “I’m supposed to be getting back.”
“For what?”
Their mind went blank and they stared silently at Doc. They must stock up on excuses for when they needed them.
“I thought so. I’ll buy and you don’t need to answer any of my questions if you don’t want to.”
Joey sighed. They were hungry and Doc would appreciate the company. “I can spare an hour.” They got up and headed for the door. “And you’re definitely paying.”
By the time they crossed the bay toward the Inishderry lighthouse, Joey had to admit they felt more relaxed about Marianne. Outside of work, Doc was good company, and her gentle teasing had made Joey rethink their approach.
Most importantly, Doc had told Joey they should do what felt right, and not get too hung up on the long term. They knew that made sense. If they went through life always looking for reasons something might fail, they’d never take a chance on anything. Not that they thought taking a chance with Marianne was on the cards. But it would do them good to stop obsessing about the whole situation and just enjoy life a little.