Chaos Chapter 5
The unease in my gut hadn’t disappeared in the past forty-eight hours since Mishap, and I went to Sparta to see his cousin. Nor had my constant thinking about Bianca. Only a portion was about my concern for her safety and snooping into the assault cases.
Yes, I was worried that she was putting herself at risk.
She had already been drugged once. And we had no clue whether it was mere coincidence or if the rapist had known she was looking for him.
But she was memorable. If she continued frequenting bars, she would attract more unwanted and potentially dangerous attention.
Mishap and the club wanted to prevent that.
Wrath had already ordered Crusher and Shadow, with Cambria’s help, to see what they could dig up.
Rapists in our area weren’t something we’d tolerate.
However, what brought Bianca to my mind so often was her. Seeing her again hadn’t eased the awareness or sexual tension she caused in me. If anything, it was stronger. I closed my eyes and pictured her for the umpteenth time.
I knew from Mishap that she was thirty years old compared to my thirty-six. She was average height, at five feet five, but that was the only thing average about her, at least in my book.
First, there was her body. She was physically fit—some might call her athletic—with firm, feminine muscles.
She wasn’t muscular like a man. Women like that turned me off.
Bianca had a curvy figure, showing she was all woman.
The swell of her hips combined with her plump, though proportionate ass, and somewhat generous tits made her worthy of stares.
I wanted to run my hands all over her light golden skin and those curves.
Then, there was her face. She had an oval face that ended in a slightly pointed chin.
I wanted to bite it. Dark brows highlighted her thick-lashed eyes, shaped somewhat like a cat’s.
And the color was the same light peridot green that you see on some felines. They captivated you.
A delicate nose and a lush mouth with a slightly smaller upper lip balanced her features.
Her head was covered in long, straight hair that reached below her shoulder blades.
It was light brown with light gold strands.
Everything combined made her an extremely gorgeous and sexually appealing package.
That alone made her someone I’d like to have sex with.
But there was more to her than looks and a great body.
From the couple of brief interactions we had, Bianca was kind, loyal, brave, protective, and smart.
She intrigued me. I had never truly been intrigued by a woman.
Sure, I wanted them for sex, and I’d been with plenty of attractive women with good bodies.
But none of them hit me the way Bianca did.
It was as if my lungs were squeezed along with my heart, and my stomach dropped to my toes.
Each interaction made that response deepen.
But I was in sticky territory. She was a club brother’s cousin.
If she were any other woman, I wouldn’t care whether it was only sex that drove me.
I’d see if the woman was interested. If she were, then we’d have sex with the understanding that nothing more than a good time was being offered.
And that it might be for one night. When I was done, we’d part ways.
That couldn’t be the case with Bianca. We would always have a connection because of Mishap.
And no guy I knew would appreciate his club brother fucking and then walking away from his family member. I know I sure wouldn’t.
In normal circumstances, if this were to happen, I’d steer clear of the woman and find someone else to relieve my sexual frustration with. Something prevented me from doing that in Bianca’s case. And I needed to figure out why. Was there more at work here than plain desire?
Thoughts of her and my desire invaded my nights.
I tried to sleep, but it would be interrupted by hot, sensual dreams about Bianca.
In them, I had stripped her bare, feasted on her body, and then fucked her countless times in numerous ways.
I’d awaken from those dreams, hard and hurting.
And the only way to get relief was to jerk off until I came.
Usually, it takes more than once to get lasting relief.
Sure, I knew I could call any of the club bunnies or even hunt down a hanger, but the thought of fucking them when it was Bianca I desired made me feel slightly nauseous and dirty.
But tonight, sitting here in the clubhouse, I knew that I had to get past that. I was growing desperate, and hand jobs weren’t enough. And I couldn’t go to Bianca for relief. I hated the idea of using her that way, and Mishap would beat my ass.
The music was blaring. Everyone was here tonight except for Rage and Betty.
They had stayed home and watched Dora, Wrath and Jalisa’s year-and-a-half-old daughter, so her parents could have fun.
She was the only child so far in our chapter, though we were all waiting for Cambria to announce she was pregnant.
The way she and Shadow went at it, it was only a matter of time.
Bunnies and hangers milled around the common room. They drank, laughed, flirted, danced provocatively, and in some cases blatantly made offers of sex to whoever caught their eye or encouraged them. Making eye contact, even accidentally, was seen as encouragement by some of them.
I’d decided to let loose and drink tonight.
I typically stayed sober, allowing myself only a couple of drinks.
I wanted to remain alert and in control.
You never knew when you might be called for help.
We not only protected our chapter but also backed up our sister chapter in Cherokee and several other clubs scattered across Virginia, Tennessee, and Florida that were our friends.
We functioned as a large, close-knit family despite coming from different MCs.
It wasn’t common for chapters of different clubs to be friends.
It was through Cherokee that we became friends with the Archangel’s Warriors, Ruthless Marauders, Iron Punishers, and Horsemen of Wrath MCs. We were friends with a paramilitary group called the Dark Patriots. It was great to have so many people have your back.
A scraping sound coming from the dragging of stool legs on the concrete floor to my left made me turn my head.
Dropping onto the barstool next to me was Fury.
He was a brother, a tattoo artist. He ran The Inked Pagan, our tattoo shop.
It took some persuading to get him to open the place, but it was a huge success.
It had been open for just over two years, and he had three other ink slingers working there, plus a front desk person who also pierced.
They were booked solid most weeks. And Fury was in high demand.
As with all our club businesses, it was profitable.
“Hey, mind if I join you?” Fury asked.
“Make yourself at home,” I replied.
I noted he had a beer in his hand like I did, though a different brand.
We kept the bar in the clubhouse well stocked with a variety of alcohol and non-alcoholic drinks.
Kingston, one of the prospects working behind the bar, automatically slid a bowl of pretzels and another of nuts in front of us.
I took a handful of the pretzels. There was silence for about a minute before Fury broke it.
“You doing okay?” he asked.
“I’m fine. Why do you ask?” I replied.
Fury shrugged and then answered me. “You’ve been here a few hours.
You’ve barely said a word to anyone. You’ve stuck to yourself.
You look like you’re a million miles away.
And every attempt to get you to take one or more of the women back to a crash room has been ignored or rebuffed.
And you’re drinking a lot, for you. I’m here if you need to talk.
I’m practically a professional therapist. Just ask my customers,” Fury ended with a grin.
His words made me chuckle. I opened my mouth to tell him I was fine and didn't need therapy, but I paused. Maybe if I talked to him, he could help me make sense of my obsession with Bianca. I needed another guy’s opinion.
And there was no way I could talk to Mishap about it.
There was always Forge, but he was busy playing darts.
He tried to get me to play, but I’d told him no.
I scanned the large common room. It was where we spent the bulk of our hanging-out time. It was rather full, but I spotted a dark, remote corner with an empty table. I pointed to it.
“Let’s go over there so we can hear ourselves think. And no one can overhear us,” I suggested.
“Works for me,” Fury said.
As we stood, he picked up his beer and the bowl of nuts. I decided to take the pretzels along with my beer. We wove our way through the bodies. Our names were called. Offers to join others were made. We were polite, but either shook our heads or said a firm “No, thank you,” and kept moving.
Our brothers accepted it. The women gave us upset looks, and some pouted. At the table, we sank into chairs with our backs to the walls. We’d be able to see anyone who approached. I took a swig of beer, not knowing where to start. Fury watched me. When I said nothing after swallowing, he did.
“Just start anywhere, Chaos. It’s not like you to be withdrawn. Is everything okay at work?”
“Everything is great at work. We’ve been busier than ever. It’s tiring but worth it.” That was all that came out.
“Damn, do I need to go get a winch and a big rope to drag it out of you? I will if I have to,” Fury only half-joked.
“Hell, maybe. I don’t know why I’m so twisted up. I’ll start at the beginning. You know how Mishap’s cousin came here and what happened to her at that bar. And the concern we’ve had that she won’t leave it alone.” I paused, and he nodded.