15. Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Fifteen
November 15, 1811 Netherfield Park, Hertfordshire Elizabeth
J ane and Mr. Bingley sat together on a settee near the fire. Jane had dressed for dinner in her blue gown. It was one from London, and it was far too nice for a country evening, but she matched the Bingley sisters in elegance, much to their chagrin.
Elizabeth, too, wore one of her best gowns. It was expertly made, but in country fashions instead of what was currently in vogue in town. Made from the finest fabric, it fit her perfectly, and gave her a look of understated elegance. Uncle Mavery insisted that his nieces be dressed as befitting the nieces of an earl and purchased a new wardrobe for Mary and Elizabeth once a year when they visited Elm Grove.
Mrs. Bennet hated that her stepdaughters were better dressed than her own daughters. Mr. Gardiner provided an excellent yardage of silks, satins, muslins, and more from his warehouses, and at excellent prices, but Mrs. Bennet declared she could not afford a London modiste. They made do with the local seamstress and opted to trim their gowns themselves.
Elizabeth knew her stepmother spent the funds elsewhere. She did not understand why the lady was worried. Jane looked lovely and her attire tonight would not be out of place in a London drawing room. But everything was a competition to Mrs. Bennet, and because Elizabeth and Mary’s wardrobes were expensively made, then the other girls’ clothing must be better.
Jane’s more forward behavior seemed to be present that night. Elizabeth watched her sister touch Mr. Bingley’s arm several times before sliding closer to him. The hem of her gown brushed the tops of his boots, and when she looked up from the book that they held between them, there was but a few finger widths between their lips.
Propriety must have reinserted itself, for Jane blushed and glanced away, biting her lip and looking a little guilty.
It would be nothing if she really liked him, Elizabeth thought. She bit her lip and turned her attention elsewhere, seeking to observe something else for a while.
Miss Bingley took to the instrument and began playing a Scottish reel. Her sister tapped her foot in time and fiddled with the bracelets on her wrist. Mr. Hurst lay asleep on the settee, his snores punctuating his sister-in-law’s performance.
“I have a mind to dance a reel, Miss Elizabeth.” Mr. Darcy appeared to her left and she looked up in surprise. She smiled and turned her attention back to Jane. She and Mr. Bingley did not seem aware of anyone else in the room.
“Will you?”
She turned back to Mr. Darcy. “Will I what?"
He cleared his throat. “Will you dance with me?”
“Forgive me, Mr. Darcy. I thought you were in jest.” She smiled placatingly. “I have no wish to dance tonight. I find reading to be more tolerable.” And watching my sister.
“Tolerable?” he repeated. She watched his expression. He looked confused, and then comprehension dawned. “You use that word frequently,” he remarked.
“Yes, I believe I heard it said in an assembly hall once.”
He frowned but said nothing. She wondered briefly if he even realized that it was her and Mary whom he had insulted. He had not even looked at her when she had chastised him for his words. Perhaps he did not know that she had sought to put him in his place. Whatever the cause, he seemed to mull over her words as if trying to work through some puzzle. He stood there, towering over her for a moment more before turning on his heel and retreating across the room.
“Mr. Darcy!” Miss Bingley hailed him as he came near the pianoforte. “How kind of you to come turn my pages.”
“I believe I shall retire, Miss Bingley. Pray excuse me.” He left the room through the far door, closing it behind him as he went.
“Whatever has got into Mr. Darcy?” Mrs. Hurst said loudly.
“I am certain that the lack of proper company wears on him.” Miss Bingley sniffed as she leafed through a stack of music.
“Does he find so little favor in your company?” Elizabeth asked innocently.
“What a ridiculous thing to say!” Miss Bingley’s laugh was high pitched and slightly frantic. She had, of course, meant to insult Elizabeth only to have her words turned back on her.
Jane and Bingley were oblivious to everything else going on around them, and so Elizabeth was forced to endure snipes from the superior sisters for the rest of the evening. When they rose to retire, she did as well, beckoning to Jane.
When her sister tried to protest, Mr. Bingley sided with Elizabeth. “You are not yet well, Miss Bennet. Pray, go. We will see each other at breakfast.”
Jane held her handkerchief to her nose and sniffed. She coughed a little, and Elizabeth rolled her eyes at the display. What utter nonsense. You are as well as I am.
They left together arm in arm until they were out of sight. Once they reached the stairs, Jane dropped Elizabeth’s arm and stuck her nose in the air. She gathered her skirt and climbed the stairs, ignoring her sister trailing behind.
The next morning, Elizabeth woke determined to see their return to Longbourn that day. She quietly asked the maid Miss Bingley had assigned to them to pack the trunks after she and Jane quit their respective rooms and then made her way to the breakfast parlor. Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy were already there, but there was no sign of the others.
“Jane is well enough to travel, sir,” she said. “Might I request that a carriage be arranged to return us to Longbourn this morning?”
Mr. Bingley looked disappointed but agreed. Jane appeared a moment later, smiling brightly.
“I am pleased that we will have this last meal together before you depart, Miss Bennet,” Mr. Bingley said as she seated herself on his right.
“Oh. Yes.” Jane’s immediate confusion turned to comprehension as she stared Elizabeth down. The latter did not look away but met her sister’s ire with a placid smile.
“Mr. Bingley has agreed to call the carriage after breakfast,” she said politely. Jane replied with a nod and a strained smile. Elizabeth felt relieved that her sister had not contested the information. To do so would have put her in a bad light before Mr. Bingley.
Mr. Darcy said nothing throughout the meal. He did not even react when he learned the ladies were to depart.
Why am I concerned with his thoughts? she asked herself. His good opinion does not matter to me. It is not worth having, either.
Still, it bothered her that such an eligible man perceived her as tolerable. Mary, too, had been affected. Her sister’s pain had overshadowed her own wounded vanity at the time, but now, as she reflected, she realized his callous words had hurt her deeply. It had shaken her confidence, and she did not like it.
I believe I shall grow to hate the word tolerable, she mused.
Jane lingered over breakfast, and as such, so did Mr. Bingley. The Sunday services were to begin shortly, and so it was decided that the ladies would be returned to Longbourn after the services. Mr. Bingley said Jane needed to rest before the carriage ride, anyway.
Elizabeth bit the insides of her cheeks in frustration, but said nothing. When the gentlemen’s backs were turned, Jane cast her a triumphant look. If it had been Lydia, she would have stuck her tongue out.
At long last, the sisters were installed in the carriage and on their way back to Longbourn. Jane turned away and looked out the window, watching until Mr. Bingley was out of sight. Nellie was tied to the back and plodded along slowly behind the carriage.
They rode in silence for the entire distance. Some realization settled within Elizabeth as they went. The Jane she knew and loved was gone, and the creature in her place had no need or desire for her stepsister’s company. That likely extended to Mary, too. Though she felt saddened and longed to understand, acceptance gradually crept into her heart. Jane must make her own way now, Elizabeth thought. I will not defend her, nor help her, for she is acting in a way so contrary to what I expect that I cannot countenance it.
By the time they arrived at Longbourn, a new resolve to be happy regardless of how her supposed family treated her had solidified. She and Mary would leave in a few short months and all the bitter, angry harpies would be left behind forever.
They entered the house and removed their things. Mrs. Bennet could be heard in the parlor, and Jane stalked off toward the sound of her mother’s voice.
Elizabeth meant to go to her chambers when she had removed her things, but her stepmother’s shouts for her to come beckoned her.
“What are you about, Miss Lizzy?” Mrs. Bennet scowled. Jane sat next to her, a piteous look on her face and her hand clasped in her mother’s. “How dare you intervene to prevent Jane from hearing Mr. Bingley’s offer!!”
“I do not know what you mean,” Elizabeth said calmly. “Jane had much opportunity to spend with the gentleman whilst we stayed at Netherfield Park.”
“And yet, here you are, a full day before I said you should return. What say you to that?” Mrs. Bennet snapped.
“Jane is well. It is abundantly clear. Do you wish her to be thought mercenary, imposing her presence upon the residents of Netherfield through pretense?”
“Do not attempt to justify your actions. Had you stayed but one more day, Jane would now be betrothed to Mr. Bingley. Instead, you have ruined her chances. I am glad you will be gone soon, for you are actively seeking to ruin the hopes of a more worthy woman. Will you do the same to Kitty and Lydia, hmm? Over my dead body. Yes, it is best that you are gone from here, for no one wants you.”
“That is enough, Mrs. Bennet.”
Elizabeth breathed a sigh of relief at her father’s voice. He had come to save her again.
“You may go, Elizabeth. Mary is waiting for you in the study.”
She hurried away, glad that she would not be privy to her father’s latest lecture. His efforts were appreciated, but they came too late, really. Had he corrected his wife’s behavior years ago, things might have been very different.
She and Mary retreated to their chambers until dinner. Mrs. Bennet took a tray in her room, claiming that her nerves were overwhelmed. Kitty and Lydia ate at one end of the table with Jane. Papa did not appear, either, and she and Mary exchanged worried glances.
Elizabeth excused herself as soon as possible and made her way to the study. It was dark, with only the dying coals in the fire lighting the room. Papa sat before a window. Only a little light came through, illuminating the framed picture in his hands.
“Papa?” She came closer and put a hand on his shoulder.
She glanced down and recognized the miniature of her mother. “Mary looks very like her,” she whispered.
“Yes, she does.” He sniffed and reached for his handkerchief. “Nineteen years, Elizabeth. It has been nearly two decades. And yet the wound aches as if it were yesterday. It is not fair. You and Mary ought to have been raised by your true mother. You ought to have had brothers and sisters and been smothered in her love.”
“Life is unkind sometimes,” Elizabeth agreed. She mourned the mother she had never known but could not fully empathize with her father’s sentiments. Perhaps if she remembered Lady Olivia Bennet, she would feel more devastation at her loss.
“Do you know why I do not drink, Elizabeth?”
This question startled her, for it had long been a matter of curiosity for her. He shook under her hand. An empty tumbler sat next to a long empty decanter on his desk. She knew he did not drink—not even a glass of wine at dinner—and she wondered what significance the crystal glassware held for him.
He related in broken terms how his decision to abstain had come about. Appalled, her grip on his shoulder tightened. He reached up and took her hand, squeezing it gently.
“I am well, Elizabeth. I came to terms with the consequences of my actions long ago. Mr. Gardiner I forgave, though he never explained why he acted in the manner he did. Perhaps he acted altruistically, believing that his widowed child and the poor widower of Longbourn could benefit each other.”
“But to take advantage of you during your grief! That is despicable!” Elizabeth shook her head.
“I attempted to make the best of it, but Mrs. Bennet and I are very different. Her propensity for levity and her lack of self-control were more than I could bear. Amidst my longing for your mother, disgust and resentment formed. I withdrew, leaving you and Mary to her mercy… or lack thereof. Despite your uncle’s many urgings to be better, I could not. I was far too lost in my sorrows.” He shook his head. “I am trying to be better, my dear, but now I face a new challenge. Every time I look at Mary, I see my dear wife. The wounds I thought healed have reopened and fester now.”
“You will not forsake my sister because she looks like our mother!” Elizabeth gaped in shock. Her father tightened his grip on her hand.
“Never, Elizabeth. I must allow my wounds to heal now, instead of thinking that they will go away if I ignore them long enough.” He looked up and smiled. Tears glistened in his eyes. “Mrs. Bennet will leave you be. If she does not, come to me immediately.”
“I worry for Jane, Papa,” Elizabeth blurted. “She is making a fool of us all.” Quickly, she told her father about Netherfield and all the cruel things Jane had said since the assembly. “You see, she has turned into Mrs. Bennet. Her actions will be the ruin of us if she is not stopped.”
“Unfortunately, I am not the girl’s guardian, despite being the only father she has ever known. That responsibility falls to Mr. Gardiner, her uncle. Why do you think Jane visits them every summer?” He smiled sadly. “She cannot do any harm to you and Mary.”
“Do you care nothing for Kitty and Lydia?” she cried. “Without your intervention, they are destined to ruin their reputations, and their sisters’ along with it!”
“They are too far gone, I fear. No sort of direction can change them from the silliest girls in all of England into sensible young ladies.”
She shook her head. “You are giving up, then?”
“They are of little temptation to fortune hunters,” he assured his daughter. “With the militia stationed nearby, they will have their fill of officers and learn their lack of importance in the world all the quicker.” He spoke disinterestedly, and Elizabeth wondered if he loved her youngest sisters at all.
There was nothing more that she could say. She bent down and kissed his cheek, and then left the room.