Chapter 10
CHAPTER 10
Amber
I stare at the bathroom door for long seconds after Isaac leaves the room. I feel lonely. I find myself wishing he would have stayed. I’ve been using the bathroom alone for most of my life. It’s madness that I suddenly feel like I want Isaac with me.
I almost told him I didn’t think I could shower alone, but that would have been going way too far. As I peel my shirt over my head, I shudder at the memory of Isaac putting it on me earlier. When I rock my hips back and forth to get my skinny jeans off, I’m reminded of the chuckle we shared when he pulled these up my body.
Isaac saw me in my bra and panties today. He was a total gentleman, but that almost made it weirder. I stare at myself in the full-length mirror on the back of my bathroom door. I trail a finger down between my breasts and then cup them through the bra.
It’s been a long time since I’ve let myself be sexual. I sometimes have fleeting thoughts about Isaac, but I rarely let them develop into more because the idea has always scared me to death.
Standing alone in my bathroom, I lower one strap of my bra down my bicep and drag a finger along the lace edge on the upper swell of my breast. Slipping my finger under the lace to flick my nipple, I gasp. What would it feel like to have Isaac do this? To have Isaac look at me with that intensity in his eyes while he explores my body?
I lower the other strap next and grasp the edge of the vanity with one hand to steady myself as I let my mind wander to places it should not go. It’s so easy to close my eyes and pretend it’s Isaac touching me. He’s breathing heavily, and so am I. He’s staring at my chest as he lowers the cups of my bra until the heavy globes pop free. He’s not in Daddy mode. He’s looking at me like a man hungrily eyes a woman.
I have to release the vanity to cup both breasts and thumb my nipples. It’s not me, though, it’s him. Stroking, teasing, flicking until I’m panting and desperate. From nipple play. Who knew I could get aroused from nipple play? So much so that my panties are wet.
“Legs open,” he growls.
I startle at the sound of his voice, so real in my head. So real that I jerk my gaze toward the door to make sure I truly did imagine it. I half expect to find him standing there, but he’s not. He won’t come in here. There’s no way.
Breathing heavily, I remove my bra and panties, but the visual doesn’t stop. I’m shaking as I close my eyes again and let myself go back into the daydream.
Isaac is still staring at me, waiting for me to part my legs, and I do so. It causes me to shudder. The air in the room hits my pussy, making me hyper-aware of my need.
“Pinch your nipples, baby,” he orders in a deep, sexy voice I’m not familiar with—a voice I’ve conjured.
I do as I’m told, arching my chest at the bite of pain. It’s my fantasy, so I’ll have him order me to do whatever feels good.
“Slide one hand down to your pussy, baby.”
I lower my hand and cup myself.
“Good girl. Drag a finger through your folds.” As soon as I’ve done so, he orders, “Show me. Show me your wetness.”
I lift my finger as if he’s standing in front of me.
“Good girl. Suck it. Taste yourself.”
I hesitate. My mind is racing with ideas, getting ahead of me. Do I really want to follow through with this and taste my pussy? My thoughts are so naughty.
I bring my finger to my lips and suck. My taste is mild. Not as salty as I expected.
“Good girl. Touch your pussy again, Amber.” The way he says my name gives me goosebumps.
I whimper as I touch myself again. This time, I circle my clit.
“So sexy, baby. Push that finger up inside you. Just the one. I don’t want you to stretch your cunt. I want it to be nice and tight when I enter you.”
I sway forward and have to release my breast to keep from falling. I grab the vanity, white-knuckling it as I push my middle finger into my pussy. I wonder if Isaac would really use filthy words like cunt . The dirty talk in my head is so sexy.
I’m tight because it’s been a very long time since anyone has touched me, including myself. There’s a vibrator in my nightstand, but it’s the discreet kind that’s meant to be pressed against my clit. I’ve never owned one that goes inside me. Maybe I should order one.
The idea is preposterous, though. There’s no way I could receive a package and get it past Isaac without him seeing it. Maybe I could tell him I’m expecting paints or brushes or something, and he could just hand it to me when it arrives. He wouldn’t open something so boring.
Except he would.
He opens everything in order to ensure nothing dangerous is delivered. I’m sure Spence told him to a long time ago.
I push my finger deeper, letting my palm grind against my clit until my knees start shaking. I’ve never tried to orgasm standing up. I might collapse. The idea of sitting on the cold tile doesn’t appeal to me, but I glance at the toilet and decide that’s my best option.
Removing my finger, I lower the toilet seat and sit.
“Legs wide, Amber. Let me see your pretty cunt.”
It’s amazing how fast I return to the daydream. I let my head fall back as I fuck myself with one finger while the other strokes my clit. I’m on my tiptoes, bracing myself. It’s still not ideal. I hope I don’t fall to one side. I don’t need to hit my head again today. How would I explain myself?
“Is your clit swollen, baby?”
“Yes,” I breathe out to the empty room.
“Pinch it.”
I obey him. It hurts, so I ease back enough to enjoy the bite without pulling myself out of the vision. I’ve never pinched my clit before. It sounds sexy in books. It’s a bit much in real life.
“I need to add another finger,” I mutter.
“No, baby. You’ll come from the one finger. Rub your clit again. I want to watch you unravel.”
I flick the swollen nub rapidly, letting my arousal climb until I’m so close. I can’t believe I’m able to do this with only one finger, but it’s the thought of him ordering me that’s making me hornier.
“Come, Amber.”
“Yes, Sir.” I gasp as I let my orgasm sweep through me. My eyes pop open, and I pray I haven’t made too much noise. I’d be mortified if Isaac caught me touching myself.
I remove my hands from my pussy and grip the sides of the toilet to brace myself while my breathing calms down. When I finally stand, my legs are shaky. I grab a washcloth and clean the lid of the toilet. It’s soaked with my arousal.
Finally, I reach in and turn on the shower. Sheesh. I’ve been in here a long time. I don’t know how long. I didn’t bring my phone. Isaac said he would tuck me in after my shower. I should hurry.
No. That’s not what Isaac said. He said he would check on me. I’m twisting it because I like the idea of him tucking me in.
I hurry into the shower and grab the shampoo. I should make this quick, but I won’t because, suddenly, I want to shave my pussy. I haven’t done so in a while. I keep it trimmed because I don’t like the wiry hair, but today seems like a good day to go completely bare.
I take my time showering, being extra careful not to nick my skin. By the time I’m done, have my hair dry, and brush my teeth, I figure I’ve been in here for over an hour. That’s not like me.
I open the door a few inches to make sure I’m alone before pushing it the rest of the way so I can hurry across the room and grab something to sleep in. I should have brought clothes into the bathroom with me, but I didn’t.
Without thinking, I grab my usual—a thin white tank top and white panties. I’m under the covers with the lights out in short order. As I stare at the closed door, my heart races. I realize I’m anticipating Isaac. Maybe he won’t really come in. That thought disappoints me. Maybe I took so long that he went to bed, but that’s not likely. I can see faint illumination coming under the door, which means there are lights on somewhere in the apartment, maybe in his bedroom.
I take deep breaths, trying to calm myself. I shouldn’t be so anxious for him to check on me. I don’t have a clue what I’ll say. I’m straddling two lives. The old one is safe and comfortable. The new one is uncertain and scary. It has risks—one of them being my heart breaking. But maybe I’ve been foolish not letting myself live and take chances.
I shouldn’t rush into anything. I need to be certain of what I want. I could ruin everything if I make hasty decisions. Though, I also realize I’ve known Isaac for two years. He’s been living with me for half that time. Nothing between us could really be deemed hasty.
The clock ticks. Maybe he isn’t coming. Maybe I should have gone in search of him after I showered if that’s what I wanted. I can’t do that now. I’m not wearing enough clothes. He may have seen me in my bra and panties earlier, but this tank top is more revealing than a bra. He wouldn’t be able to miss the pucker of my hard nipples or even the dark shade of them through the thin material.
He also wouldn’t be able to miss the fact that my panties are already wet even though I’ve just put them on. I can’t hide my lust. I need to stay where I am. If he doesn’t come in, I’ll survive.