Chapter 26
Chapter Twenty-Six
CALLIE
Nerves flutter in my stomach as we park outside of Lulu’s home on the other side of town.
I know a lot about Lulu. She lost her husband when she was only in her thirties and refused to remarry.
She’s become the town’s handywoman and won’t let anyone give her shit.
She also stepped in when the guys’ mom ran out, so in a way, she’s like their mom.
And I know she’s not too happy with me for the way I left, but it’s time to face the music. When Lulu sends you a handwritten invitation to dinner, you attend.
Brax cuts the engine. His truck—basically a photocopy of Jax’s—is a little cleaner than his twin’s, and he drives like he actually cares about the speed limit.
I guess that’s the schoolteacher in him.
Jax is still a little untamed. I start to climb out of the passenger seat, but Knox is suddenly there, opening the door for me and offering me a hand.
“I can get out by myself.”
“Yeah, but you shouldn’t have to.”
Sighing, I swallow the rest of my protest. Their dad and Lulu raised them to be gentlemen.
Plus, it’s nice after the way Theo would walk through doors without even holding them.
I can’t even count how many doors I had to catch before they smacked me in the face.
That really should have been the final straw.
But I’m an idiot.
And this is no time for self-loathing because Lulu is standing on her porch, hands on her hips with a look that could eviscerate someone.
I take a breath and straighten my spine.
Whatever she has to say, I deserve. Especially after missing Frank’s funeral.
She means a lot to the guys, and avoiding her is out of the question, so with another breath, I walk up the steps.
She watches me like a hawk watching prey. The lines on her face have deepened, but Lulu is beautiful. Always has been. Age is cruel to some people, but on Lulu, the years look like marks of love. For the guys’ sake, I hope she has plenty left.
“Hey, Lu,” I say, giving her a nervous grin.
“If I didn’t know your mama, I’d wonder if you were a Bar-tailed Godwit.”
One eyebrow lifts. “And what’s that bird known for?”
She’s a devout bird watcher and knows enough facts that she should probably write a book. “The Bar-tailed Godwit goes all around the world but always finds its way back to its breeding and wintering grounds.”
Knox chokes on a cough at the word breeding.
Lulu’s lips twitch. “I hope you’re using condoms.”
“Jesus, Aunt Lu,” Jax mumbles.
Brax stammers.
I sigh. “Could you three be any more obvious?”
“They couldn’t keep a secret from me if they tried.” Lulu studies me, still not smiling. “Are you here to stay?”
Even though I’d prepared for her lecture, all the things she might say, this question catches me off guard. I hadn’t really thought about whether or not I’m here for good. The guys fall silent around me, and the weight of everyone’s attention settles on my shoulders.
“I, uh, I hadn’t really thought that far ahead.”
“Boys, go in. Pull the casserole out of the oven and set the table.”
“Yes, ma’am,” they say in unison before filing into the house and abandoning me.
Traitors.
Lulu squints at me. “These three don’t need another woman running out on them, let alone the same one doing it twice.”
She means their mother. A sore subject, especially for Lulu, since she was her sister. The boys lost their mom, and Lulu lost the only family she had left.
“I didn’t mean to hurt them.” I hook my fingers together. “Would it help to tell you I thought Knox posted the video?”
She doesn’t bend. “That boy has loved you since you were little. Why would he do that?”
I blink, fighting a wave of tears that come unexpectedly. Everyone has been gentle about it, but not Lulu. In a way, I admire how cutthroat she is, but right now, I wish a hole would appear and swallow me whole. “I don’t know,” I confess.
Lulu crosses her arms. “Did you even ask him?”
Suddenly I’m two feet tall. “No, ma’am.”
She makes a displeased sound. “You get one pass because you were young and dumb,” she tells me, tone stern.
“But you’re a grown ass woman now, Callie, and I swear to god, if you hurt my nephews like that again, I will hunt you down and skin you myself.
I don’t care what type of gun your daddy has, mine is bigger, I promise you that. ”
I don’t doubt it.
“You talk. You tell them when they make you mad or sad. You help them understand you. You do not run away. Do you hear me?”
Swallowing, I nod. “Yes, ma’am.”
Her glare drills into me for a full twenty seconds before her features soften. “Give me a hug,” she says, voice shaky as she opens her arms.
I fall into the embrace, hating that she trembles a little. This is my fault. I hurt so many people with how I left, but I won’t make that same mistake again. “I’m sorry, Lulu.”
Sniffing, she pulls back and cups my face, blue eyes misty. “My goodness, Callie Mae. You’re gorgeous.”
“Lulu,” I complain, glancing away.
“You are, and you should love yourself.” She sighs and steps back, hands falling away.
“If my sixty years have taught me anything, it’s that I should have loved myself a hell of a lot more than I did.
Time can steal a lot from you, and before you know it, you’ll be looking at pictures of yourself at twenty, longing to get those years back. ”
“You’re beautiful, Lulu,” I tell her, reaching for her hand.
She bristles. “Oh, I know that. It’s my knees that are the problem.” She huffs. “I woulda sucked a lot more dick if I’d known.”
“Oh my god, Lulu.” I plug my ears. “I can’t hear this.”
Cackling, she grabs my arm and drags me into the house.
I burst out laughing as she tickles my side, calling me a prude, but we both stop short when we catch the guys moving around the kitchen in a well-practiced dance, grabbing everything they need to set the table.
Lulu wraps her arms around me in a side hug.
“They missed you more than you know, hun. I missed you too.”
I pat her forearm and rest my head against hers. “I missed you too.”
We watch the guys work, both of us gazing at them with nothing but love and adoration. Lulu’s comes from watching them toddle around and turn into men, and mine comes from my soul. These men mean the world to me, and I’m slowly starting to realize that the only place that makes sense is with them.
“No! That was Brax’s ass, not mine.” Jax jabs his finger in his twin’s direction.
“Jax Williams. Don’t lie,” Lulu says with a laugh.
Brax’s ears are bright pink.
I narrow my eyes. The only reason he’d be blushing is if Jax was right. Brax is the one who mooned our old kindergarten teacher, putting her into early retirement. Everyone always said it was Jax. “Braxton,” I say with a laugh. “You didn’t.”
“He did!” Jax insists. “Everyone blames me, but it was him.”
“Because you had no qualms showing your ass to random strangers.”
“It was a dare,” he grumbles, pointing to his twin again. “His idea.”
“It was a good one,” Brax argues.
Lulu looks at Brax, aghast that the nephew who is the best behaved would do such a thing.
“And it was Brax who set that trash can on fire at my junior prom,” Knox says, laughing when Lulu’s eyes bug out of her head.
My mouth practically unhinges. “Brax! What the hell?” I remember when the alarms started blaring and how the students ran screaming from the building.
He exhales. “Well, you were dancing with Sean.”
“So you decided to burn the building down?”
“If it meant getting his hands off of you.” Brax shrugs. Jax nods as if this is a totally normal reaction, and Knox grins, though he doesn’t say it, I can tell he’s on their side.
“You guys are unwell,” I mutter, shaking my head.
“Jax,” Lulu says, voice soft. “I’m so sorry I thought it was you.”
Jax exhales. “Falsely accused of ass stuff.” He shakes his head. “It’s really stuck with me, Lu.”
“Oh, screw you,” Lulu mutters. “You weren’t a saint.” I chuckle and she looks at me and my mouth snaps closed. “And you,” she says, poking my arm. “You were worse than them half the time.”
“I wasn’t,” I protest, but we all know it’s a lie.
She taps her chin. “Remind me who put spiders in Frank’s underwear drawer?”
“Pretty sure that was Jax.”
“Hey!”
Lulu makes an uh-huh sound. “And who stuck my keys in a bowl of soup and froze it?”
“Oh, that was Knox.”
Knox gives me a look. “Don’t drag me down with you.”
“And who thought it would be fun to steal the snowplow?” she asks.
“In my defense,” I begin, straightening in my seat. “The driver shouldn’t have left the keys in the ignition, and he was slacking on the job! I had somewhere to be.”
Lulu’s eyebrows lift. “You mean you had to get home before your parents realized you didn’t make curfew?”
I press my lips together.
“So what I’m hearing is that we haven’t caused nearly enough trouble,” Jax says, sipping his beer. “Maybe it’s time to do something naughty.”
“Frank would whoop your ass,” Lulu says with a grin.
Knox takes a swig of his beer.
“I’d like to see Dad try,” Jax fires back with a melancholy grin.
“You know he’d do it,” Brax says with a laugh.
“I miss him,” Lulu says softly.
Knox pushes away from the table so suddenly the four of us still sitting jolt in surprise. He storms out of the front door. Jax and Brax trade looks.
Lulu shakes her head and releases a heavy breath. “He’s still not talking about him?”
“Won’t even say a word,” Brax says.
“We can’t talk about him without setting him off.” Jax glares at the door. “He can’t keep bottling it up.”
I chew on my cheek, worry gnawing at my gut. Knox has always kept his emotions carefully controlled. Almost as if he doesn’t want to feel things. My gaze skips to the shadowy figure in the window pacing back and forth across the porch.
“Go on,” Lulu murmurs, nudging me. “Maybe you can get to him.”
Doubt rushes through me, but I’m willing to try. “I’ll be back,” I tell them, nodding at the twins before heading out into the warm humidity of the night.
Knox stops pacing, scowling at the trees that surround Lulu’s home.
“Hey.”
His jaw muscle flexes.
Okay. No talking. Got it. I pad over to him, slip my arm in his, and stare out at the trees. The cicadas are practically screaming tonight, and fireflies flicker about. It would be peaceful if not for the storm brewing inside Knox.
“Did you know some female fireflies lure the males in with their light only to eat them?”
“Jesus Christ, Callie.”
I smirk. “Don’t worry, you’re too big for them to eat.”
He glances at me, eyes shrouded in shadows and heavy with grief. “They all think something’s wrong with me,” he tells me, voice rough.
My heart aches for him. “Is there?”
The flicker of pain in his irises guts me. “I don’t know,” he confesses. “Do you think that?”
“No.” The word comes out fierce. I take a breath, turning until we’re chest to chest. “I think that everyone deals with pain their own way, and if this is yours, then it’s yours, but you have to process it, Knox.”
“It hurts.” His eyes shift between mine. “A lot,” he rasps.
I think losing Frank stirred up some memories of his mom. Knox, being the oldest, had to take on a lot of that pain for his younger brothers. He took being a big brother so seriously he never let himself be sad or mad. He buried it all down deep.
“You’re a good man,” I whisper. “Strong, but even tough guys have to cry.”
He frowns. “Crying isn’t going to help anyone.”
“It might help you,” I tell him, reaching up to cup his face. “But I’m not asking you to let it out tonight. Whenever you’re ready, if you need someone, I’m here.”
“Promise?” he asks, throat bobbing.
There’s a lot riding on my next words, but the decision to stay has been written in the stars since the day I came home. “I promise, Knox.”
Leaving these guys again is out of the question. They’re my home, my heart, and I think they’re part of my soul. Nothing is going to tear us apart again.