17. I Think I Should Fire You
17
I THINK I SHOULD FIRE YOU
KYLIE
“Hey, where are you at with those invoices?” Will’s voice comes through loud and clear on the speaker of my phone.
“All done and sent. What next, boss?” I listen while he rattles off a bunch of admin tasks while staring at the computer screen in front of me, trying not to sigh with boredom.
I’ve only been back for two weeks, and already, I have itchy feet again. Something about our little trip has awoken the travel bug in me, and the idea of doing the admin work from Will’s new electrician business for the rest of my life makes me want to scream into a pillow.
Tara has fallen right back into her old routine and doesn’t appear discontented at all. But she enjoys her job, for the most part. Whereas I’ve always found every job I’ve had to be beyond boring, daydreaming about doing anything else.
“Kyles? You there?” Will’s voice pulls me from my doldrums.
“Yeah, sorry. What did you say?”
“Everything okay?” he asks, the concern clear in his voice.
“Yeah. Just have some return to real life blues happening. ”
He’s quiet for a moment. “Wanna do dinner tonight?”
“Sure. What are you feeding me?”
“I can provide you with a roast chicken and salad from Woolies,” he replies, and I can just picture the cheeky grin on his face.
Will has never been the best cook. Most of his culinary experience revolves around the barbecue in his backyard, and even then, he burns the meat more often than not.
I laugh. “Sounds perfect. What time?”
“I should be home by five.”
“Okay cool, I’ll head over around sixish then.”
We hang up and I get stuck into the work he’d asked me to do, hoping to knock it all over in time to go to the gym before I head to his place. There’s no question of him coming to mine. He hasn’t set foot in my apartment since Annelisa disappeared, due to the fact that Tara also lives here. I really wish he’d stop being so bullheaded and just talk to her. I still haven’t said a word to him about knowing where Annelisa is, and I refused to ask Tara anything about what she did with her sister while I was spending time with Seth.
As my mind wanders back to that perfect day, I stare at my phone, wondering if he’s thinking about me too, or if he’s just settled right back into his old life and forgotten all about me and our time together. I regret not exchanging numbers, but we’d both known there was no future for us.
Turning back to my computer, I sigh again.
Taking this as a sign that I should just go to the gym now and attempt to get back into the work once the endorphins are flowing, I close the laptop and grab my keys. The joys of working from home is that I’ve been in my workout clothes all day and all I need to do is throw on my runners.
I head down to the gym on the second floor of our apartment building, grateful to have the place to myself. I pop my headphones on and blast out my workout mix before hopping on the treadmill to warm up.
As I reach my first kilometre, the sound of a text message interrupts my concentration, causing me to slow to a walk in order to check who it is.
Bri
Hey you. Are you around this weekend? Jake and I will be in town and thought we’d have a catch up at the apartment.
Kylie
Hey love. Yep, I’m around and would love to catch up. Just let me know the details and I’ll be there.
I put the phone back in my pocket, trying to get back into the flow, but my mind once again wanders back to Seth.
No matter how hard I try to let the memory of him go, the heart wants what it wants… and what my heart wants is the hot Canadian who has stolen it right from my chest.
I pull up out the front of Will’s place and head inside, not bothering to knock.
“Hey, I’m here,” I call, walking into the kitchen.
My brother is nowhere to be seen, so I assume he’s in the shower. I help myself to a soft drink from his fridge and take a seat at the bench, looking around at the clutter. It’s obvious that he doesn’t care about keeping the place tidy now that Annelisa is no longer around, and my heart feels heavy at the realisation.
“Hey,” Will says, coming into the kitchen wearing jeans and a hoodie, his hair wet from the shower.
“Boss,” I reply, saluting him.
“Yeah, about that. I think I should fire you,” he says casually while he gets plates out for us.
I stare at his back while he moves around the kitchen. “Um… what?”
“Well, you’re clearly miserable doing admin work. I just think you could be doing so much more than doing paperwork I could probably do myself if I could be bothered.” He finally looks at me while he’s ripping open the bag of pre-made salad.
“What else would I do, though? I need a job and I only have admin experience. Besides, we both know that you’d fuck up the paperwork if you went near the invoicing system. You need me.”
“Okay, but I don’t necessarily need you here. As in, always on hand. Why don’t you look at doing more travel and work remotely on my stuff? Maybe you could go hang out in Calgary for a while? You’ve been saying for years you wanted to spend more time there.”
I feel like I’ve stepped into the twilight zone. This was not how I thought this evening would go, but now the idea that I might not have to be trapped here forever is rolling around in my head.
Will continues talking while I stare at him. “I just… I know how much boredom affects you, and I don’t want to be responsible for that.”
This is why Will is so much more than just my brother. He has always been aware that I don’t handle the mundane well and tried to find solutions for me. Being only eighteen months older than me, he’s been my constant companion my whole life and always looked out for me.
“I mean, it’s a good idea… But I can’t just abandon my life here. I can’t leave Tara with everything going on. Unless you’re finally going to remove your head from your ass and start talking to her again,” I say this last part with a pointed look, and Will sighs.
“I know I’ve been an asshole to her. I don’t mean to hurt her, but every time I think about talking to her, my mind can’t go past begging her to tell me where Annie is. I don’t want to put her in that position.” He pulls apart the chicken, looking down at his hands, so I know he can’t see the conflicted look on my face.
My lack of impulse control kicks in. “It’s not only Tara who knows where she is.”
Will’s head flies up, and he stares at me. “What do you mean?”
I take a deep breath. Tara never told me I couldn’t say anything to Will, but I still feel guilty as hell for what I’m about to say. “She’s in London.”
The silence in the room is all-consuming while my brother remains frozen, his eyes running over my face. “You saw her?” he asks after a moment, his voice rough.
I shake my head. “No. But Tara did. I refused to see her cause I’m so fucking angry at her for just leaving without so much as a goodbye to anyone, and breaking your heart.”
Will’s face softens. “Kyles… There is a lot that no one knows. It wasn’t all Annie’s fault.”
He’s hinted before that stuff wasn’t great for them before she left, but he’s been determined to keep it to himself, saying it was between him and Annelisa. But that just makes me angrier, because he deserves closure, and her just disappearing means he will never get that.
I’m fiercely loyal to the people I love, and while once that included Annelisa, I will always have my brother’s best interests at heart.
“That aside, now that you know where she is, will you please stop avoiding group catch ups and making it awkward as hell for Tara? She feels like shit when you don’t show up to stuff, and you’re putting everyone else in a crap position where they feel like they have to take sides in a non-existent argument.” This is a well-worn discussion we’ve been having for months, but I refuse to let it go when two of my favourite people are hurting so much.
He is quiet for a while, continuing to pull the chicken apart like it’s the most important thing in the world. Finally, when I think he’s just going to ignore me once again, he gives me a considering look. “If I agree to stop avoiding Tara, will you consider my suggestion about travelling?”
“It’s not just about you. I can’t leave Tara while we’re still in a lease. I don’t want her to have to live with some random person. She’d hate that.”
Will shakes his head. “You’re not her mother. She’s a big girl and you don’t give her enough credit. She’s twenty-six, has a good job and lots of friends. Just because you’ve been living together for the last six years doesn’t mean you have to live together forever. What if one of you meets someone and wants to move in with them? It’s time to put yourself first for a change, Kyles.”
I ponder what he says for a while, and accept the plate of food he hands me before following him into the lounge room. It’s just as much of a mess in here, and I have to sweep aside a pile of clothes to sit on the couch.
“I’ll think about it, okay? Also, you really need to do something about the mess you’re living in. I can’t believe Mum hasn’t lost her mind when she’s seen how messy this place is.”
He has the sense to look ashamed. “She may have tried to organise a cleaner for me the last time she was here.”
“I think you should take her up on that. How do you ever expect any self respecting woman to want to hang out with you if you’re living like a hobo?” I ask, knowing that the chances of him dating anyone else any time soon are pretty low. The incredulous look he gives me confirms that, and I change the subject. “Did Jake reach out to you about catching up with them this weekend?”
“Yeah. Are you going?”
“Yep. I haven’t seen them in ages, and I’ll never turn down a chance to hang out in that apartment.” Jake won a luxury penthouse apartment eighteen months ago, and it’s become the unofficial place for us all to hang out when he and Bri are in town.
“Speaking of this weekend, you up for a surf on Sunday morning?” he asks .
I nod with a smile. “God, yes, I haven’t been out in months. I don’t even care that it’s probably going to be freezing.”
We spend the rest of the evening making plans for the weekend and Will keeps pushing me to consider his idea about travelling while I work for him, which I promise to think about seriously. By the time I head home, I feel like we’ve made some progress regarding both our issues, and I’m looking forward to a weekend of fun with our friends.