Chapter 18
Chapter
Eighteen
Serena
My orgasm sneaks up on me. One minute he’s pounding into me and I’m just waiting for him to get off so we can go again because it usually takes me a long time to get off during missionary intercourse.
Then, out of nowhere, he bites my neck, angles his cock to hit a magic spot deep inside me, and pleasure practically bursts out of me.
“West! Oh God, yes yes yes!” I shriek his name, bucking and thrashing just like I had when he went down on me.
That’s never happened before.
“Holy fuck.” My soul left my body again, no doubt about that. I couldn’t tell you my name right now if you offered me a million dollars.
There’s nothing but him.
West fucking McGregor.
A man as cautious as I am about dating.
And yet…there’s no mistaking how badly I want him. Not just his incredibly skilled body or the sweetness of his lips or even that deep voice that makes me shiver. No, I want more.
I want him.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I am not in a position to fall for this guy.
It’s been three days.
That’s not who I am.
“Jesus, angel.” He’s breathing hard, head buried in my shoulder.
“You chased my soul away again,” I murmur, stroking his hair.
“Uh huh.”
He’s pulling away emotionally.
I can feel it.
Just like Tony did that last night when—
Oh, hell no. I’m not going to think about him now. Even if I never see West again, I’m going to enjoy this moment.
So, we lay there for a while. Heartbeats and breathing slowly returning to normal, the sheen of sweat we share drying, and still, he doesn’t say anything.
Crap.
Did I do something wrong? I know it was good for him so why is he so quiet? I’m not going to play games, though, so I gently nudge him.
“Hey. You alive up there?”
“Barely,” he murmurs.
“Why won’t you look at me?”
That seems to snap him out of whatever haze he’s in and he lifts his head. “Sorry, angel. Just enjoying a little post-sex cuddle.”
“Liar.” I smile, watching his face. “You left me the minute it was over. I already know your body language, West. It wasn’t like that when we were fooling around at my place. Not even when you got me off a little bit ago. So, what happened and where did you go?”
He looks surprised and then shakes his head.
“I’m right here.” He drops his forehead to mine. “I might be a little overwhelmed at the intensity.”
Holy shit.
Raw, unfiltered vulnerability.
I honestly didn’t expect that from him. Not at this stage of our relationship, when everything is so casual.
“How come you’re single?” I ask after a moment. “And I’m not talking about the ex. That was just over a year ago. What about before that? You’re what, twenty-nine? That’s plenty old enough to have fallen in love, been in relationships.”
“I’ll be twenty-nine in August.” He seems thoughtful.
“I guess I was always busy with hockey. I know that sounds like an excuse, but it’s legit.
I watched a lot of my teammates get caught up in dating drama.
Cheating. Getting girls pregnant. Pressure from families.
And on the flip side, watching what happens sometimes when guys get married. ”
“What happens?” I ask curiously.
“If the guy is popular, they tear her apart. Is she good enough for him? Pretty enough? Is she a distraction? He’s scored 1.
46 percent less goals since they got married.
Oh, is she already pregnant? It can be brutal.
I decided not to go there. Not yet. Don’t get me wrong, I had a lot of fun with women. I was just super careful.”
“You don’t make dating you sound like a good time,” I deadpan, lifting my head.
He chuckles. “Oh, I think I showed you a pretty good time.”
“That you did.”
After a soft, sweet kiss, he pulls out and rolls to the side, taking me with him so I’m nestled in his arms. It’s chilly now that we’re not fooling around anymore, and I shiver in the semi-darkness.
“You cold, angel?”
“A little.”
“Get under the covers. I’ll be right back.
” He gets up and pads into the bathroom leaving me to take in his glorious backside.
He truly has a magnificent body. Broad shoulders, a chiseled ass, huge, muscular thighs, and the world’s flattest stomach.
I can’t see it now, but I saw it when he pulled his shirt off and his six-pack is hard to forget.
In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a man with one so pronounced.
I’m under the covers when he comes back and he slides in beside me, immediately tugging me into his arms.
“Sorry you lost me there for a minute,” he says. “It’s been a while since sex was more than just…fucking.”
“Is that not what we did?”
“Yes and no. The physical part was fucking, but the mental part was…more.” He almost chokes on the last word and I don’t know how to respond.
“Do you want to end this now?” I ask quietly. “I won’t be mad. I’ll still pay you back for the car and can—”
“Stop.” He shakes his head. “No. I don’t want to end this now, and seriously, I’m not trying to be a jerk, but a few thousand dollars is nothing to me. I won’t even notice it’s gone, even if you never pay back a dime.”
Intellectually, I know that but hearing him say it feels…weird.
“Do we know it’s going to be a few thousand?” I ask.
“No, but I’m talking worst-case scenario. Even if you need a whole new engine, it’s a drop in the bucket for me, so that money and whatever debt we have between us doesn’t factor into my feelings.”
“I know you don’t want to get involved with a single mom but—”
“I’d say it’s a little late for that. We are involved.”
“Look, if you break my heart, it’s fine,” I say quietly. “I’m a big girl.”
“Here’s the thing—the reason I seemed checked out before is because I was battling my inner demons. Wondering why I’m depriving myself of something I want. Something we both want. I don’t know where this is going but it’s ridiculous that we’re both fighting it so hard.”
The fact that the jury’s still out about whether or not this could ever be more gives me hope. Because West is such a good guy. I know with every fiber of my being, if he falls in love with me, he’ll fall for Joey too. The only question is when or if that’s going to happen. And it’s a big if.
“What if…” I hesitate, because what I’m about to say sounds bad.
“What if…” he prompts, dropping his gaze to mine.
“What if we keep doing what we’re doing, spending time together, no expectations.
Just fun and passion and companionship. The truth is, and maybe it’s different for you, but it’s been nice to have someone to talk to.
To cook for. To sleep next to. Who notices when I’m cold.
Sometimes it’s hard to do everything, even something as simple as covering myself with a blanket. I’ve been alone a long time.”
“Damn, angel. I hate that for you. But I’m here now.
” He hugs me tighter. “Because I’ve missed all of those things too.
Having someone to curl up with at the end of a long day.
Cooking together. Sitting in front of the fire together with nowhere to be and nothing to do but be together. Believe me, I get lonely too.”
“You don’t have to be lonely anymore.”
“Neither do you.” His embrace tightens even more.
“How long will you be gone?”
“A week.”
I grimace. “That suddenly feels like an eternity.”
“I know. To me too. But I like the idea that you’ll be sleeping in my bed while I’m gone.”
“Probably not the whole time. I have to get home at some point.”
“Why?”
“Why?” I repeat, momentarily confused.
“Just stay here and relax. Joey can sleep in here with you if that’s what you want. You can spend time in my kitchen, since I saw how much you like it…”
I chuckle. “There’s also the added benefit of your shower. And that tub. Someday, I’m going to have a tub like that.”
“Any time you want to take a bath, just let me know. Hell, I may join you sometimes.”
“That sounds…sexy.” I drop my voice a little.
“It can be.” He pauses. “Be here when I get back. Waiting for me in my bed. Naked.”
I smile. “Okay.”
He looks down at me. “Okay? Just like that?”
“You just admitted you were lonely. I’m lonely. Being naked together is heaven. What else could I possibly say?”
“You’re a special woman, angel.” He wraps his arms around me and then pulls me on top of him. “And now I’m going to make love to you again. Maybe a few more times.”
“Don’t you have to be up early?”
He shrugs. “Yeah, but I can sleep on the plane. All I care about is the warm, wet pussy waiting for me.”
Why do those words make me clench in anticipation?
“You wet just thinking about it?” he teases, one hand drifting between my legs.
“Uh huh. Just looking at you gets me wet.”
“I like that.” He drops his head to capture my lips and we’re off and running.
Again.
It’s an attraction that burns hot, and I don’t know how I’m going to go a whole week without his touch. Or him.