Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
Delaney
I climb back into my dad’s truck after dropping Leia at school. She complains every day that she’s the first one in class and has to sit and read until someone else shows up. I half wonder if Mrs. Martinez will be calling me at some point, instructing me she needs to come closer to the bell time.
But this is best if I want to avoid Bennett at drop-off time—which I do.
The white piece of paper in my center console draws a groan from me. It’s Leia’s field trip form that’s due today, otherwise, she can’t go to the zoo for the end-of-year trip.
You can do this, Delaney. A quick run to the office. In and out. No lingering. Head down.
I spring open my door and walk steadily toward the main doors. Only a few parents are arriving now, and I know Bennett isn’t one of those parents who comes right before the bell, even without knowing it. He’s punctual and timely and annoyingly anal about being early to places.
I’m buzzed in, and I practically toss the form in the secretary’s lap, leaving with a fleeting thank you and a wave before speed-walking away as if I’m in a race back to the truck. A relieved breath flows out of me as soon as I’m safe and secure inside the cab.
But then I look through the windshield, and there he is.
Bennett stands by his truck, one hand braced on the open door, the other gently guiding Wren to the ground. He holds out her backpack, and she’s talking to him the entire time her arms slip through the straps.
She looks like him… like… I let the thought die. If I keep denying it, maybe the secret will die inside me. Especially after I came so close to revealing it the other day in his office. My confession was right on the tip of my tongue.
Wren skips off with his hand secured in hers, crossing the drive-in front of the school.
When they hit the sidewalk, he crouches and tucks her hair behind her ear, his thumb brushing her cheek with a look so tender, my chest tightens.
She swats his hand, and he shakes his head, but his smile and laughter crinkle his eyes.
Her little arms wrap around his neck, and he buries his head into her, whispering something before she draws back and runs for the school doors.
I remain there, engine running, the air conditioning rattling the vents. My palms sweat against the steering wheel as I imagine what if for the millionth time.
In my head, I’ve run a thousand versions of the moment I tell Bennett that Leia is his child. The conversation. My confession. The explanations that aren’t enough.
But Leia needs security right now. She needs stability and peace after losing Sean. Her life is in chaos, and I’m finally starting to see my little girl come back to me.
Unfortunately, it’s mostly when she talks about Wren. A girl from school she has no idea is her half sister.
Telling him Leia is his means setting fire to the remains of our lives that I haven’t even stitched back together yet.
But not telling him… means I’m the person I never thought I would be.
I squeeze my eyes shut as they fill with tears.
It doesn’t matter how many times I promise myself I’ll do it. I never do. I’m a coward and a liar, but I just want to wrap a protective bubble around Leia and me, stopping anyone else from getting in. She’s been hurt enough.
And do I dare allow the man who left me in ruins a chance to do that to my daughter?
I open my eyes to see Bennett staring at me from the sidewalk.
Shit.
I freeze, as if I could turn into a puff of air and make myself invisible. But he squints, tilts his head, and smiles. That ache in my heart squeezes again when he walks toward me.
No, no, no.
I wipe my face, brushing away the tears already halfway down my cheeks, but it’s too late to pretend I’m not crying. I put one hand on the wheel and the other on the gearshift, debating whether I should drive away before he reaches me.
But he breaks the distance too fast, and suddenly he’s right outside my window, knocking gently. “Delaney?”
I don’t look at him. I can’t.
Because if I do, I know I’ll tell him.
And if I confess, it means letting him in.
A mother protects. She doesn’t invite trouble. And that’s what I was trying to do all those years ago.
I drag my sleeve across my face and roll down the window just enough to feel the warm morning breeze. I get the faintest whiff of his cologne. Clean and grounded, as he’s always been.
“Hey,” I say, voice rough. “What are you doing here?”
He chuckles. “Same as you. School drop-off.” Bennett gives a small shrug, gaze scanning my face too closely. He doesn’t mention my red-rimmed eyes, but his brow flickers. Of course he notices. “You okay?”
I nod too fast. “Yeah. Fine. Just tired.”
His lips thin, and his gaze drifts to the school. I’m a horrible person.
Tell him. Just tell him and get rid of the guilt.
“You sure?” he asks. “You look…”
Broken? Guilty? Yep, both.
“… like you’ve had a rough morning,” he finishes, his tone softer.
I scoff. “That’s one way to put it.”
A beat of silence lands between us.
I hate that he can still read me. That part of him still wants to fix my problems.
“You want to grab a coffee?” he asks, nodding toward the little café I know is a block down. “I’ve got time.”
My heart stumbles over its beats.
I need to say no. But my fingers twitch on the steering wheel, and some desperate, tired part of me wants to sit across from him for a few minutes and pretend we’re still the people who were each other’s everything once upon a time.
I miss his friendship.
If things were different, if Leia wasn’t his, maybe I could have coffee with him and tell him all my problems. But that’s not our reality.
“I can’t,” I murmur.
“Won’t,” he says gently.
All the words I’ve wanted to tell him since I saw him at Lottie’s wedding rise up my throat, pressing against my tongue to come out.
I miss you. I’ll always love you. Our daughter has your eyes, and I don’t know how to tell you without putting her in harm’s way.
Instead, I say, “I need to get the truck back to my dad.”
He nods and steps back from the door.
My finger goes to press the window button, but he breaks the distance again, putting his hands on the roof of the truck, leaning in. “If you need or want to talk… I know… I mean, our past and all that, but just… I’m here.”
I nod and swallow all the chaos of my emotions. “Thanks, Bennett.”
I give him a tight smile, and his eyes lock with mine for a beat before he pushes himself off the truck again. I quickly put it in gear to get the hell away from him before I break.
I give myself one glance in the rearview mirror before I turn the corner, pushing it all away.