Cheater

16. Chloe

“Can you just… there. Like that, yeah,” Adam grunts.

I feel my back twinge with protest as I help him the rest of the way into his wheelchair.

“I got it,” he says, then pulls himself the rest of the way in.

Getting onto the convertible couch bed wasn’t as difficult for him as getting him back into his chair proves to be. There’s a height difference to our calibrated-for-Adam bed and the fact that the handles installed there are fixed, not something I could bring here to my office for him to use.

I open the door so he can easily maneuver out. I put the couch back the way it belongs and fold the blanket.

A new day. New attitude? New chapter for Adam and I? I don’t know. I really don’t.

We lay together for a while cuddling this morning and something in the air feels different, but I haven’t got the capacity to figure things out at this point.

He’s going to physical therapy this morning and said his brother Paul is taking him, that Paul has a surprise for him. He’s being sweet and careful with me. He offered to skip PT, but I insisted he go as well as find out what Paul’s surprise is. I told him I just need to throw myself into some work for the day.

We’ve left things unsaid, I know, but it feels like we’ve crossed over a threshold. There’s just no telling yet where it’ll take us.

My doorbell rings just after 1:30, so I answer and find Alannah standing on the step with a cardboard tray holding two coffees and a paper bag.

“Chocolate éclairs,” she states, and pushes her way past me.

“I’m working, Lan,” I mutter.

“I said chocolate éclairs,” she repeats with more than a bit of attitude. “In other words, I’m paying a toll, so you get your ass in here and talk to me.”

She goes directly to my office, sets the bag and coffee tray on the floor in front of the convertible couch, then parks her behind on it. I sit beside her, folding my legs under myself and cradling my elbows.

“Background noise needed?” she asks.

I shake my head. “Adam’s out.”

“Good. Now, spill.”

I haul in a big breath and let loose. “Derek Steele overheard our conversation in the club that night I met him. He heard all about the hall pass, all about my kinky wannabe status from the things you said, and then he proceeded to run into me multiple times. I actually thought you set it up after it happened because he knew just what to do and how to do it. So, short version is that I slept with him and then before I left the next morning, he told me he overheard our conversation.”

She stares, mouth agape.

I say, “He played me, Lan. Got what he wanted, and I don’t ever want to hear his name again. Ever again.”

She blinks a couple times with her mouth still open.

“I’m so embarrassed. I can’t believe he told me, too. Like… he used the information he heard and got what he wanted, so why tell me? Why not just let me leave and work another notch into his bedpost with me none the wiser?”

“That’s… that’s wild, Chlo. I’m…” She shakes her head, folds forward to grab the éclair bag, and then pulls one out before passing it to me. She takes a giant bite from hers.

I set the bag down on the little table beside me.

“You probably need that more than I do,” she says, gesturing toward the bag.

I shake my head. “I’ve barely been able to eat since that lovely breakfast he cooked for me Saturday morning.” I shoot her a poignant look.

She takes another bite, then says, “Wow,” with her mouth full.

“Yeah,” I say. “Even thought for a minute you might have put him up to the entire thing.”

“Me?” she points to herself.

“It’s not above you to try to fix my problems for me by talking to a hot guy about fulfilling a big chunk of my kinky sex bucket list.”

“I’d never break trust like that, sister. You know me better than that. Don’t you?”

“You’re right. Sorry,” I mumble.

“But shit, Chloe, I am sorry I got so personal in that bar. So sorry, sister. How the fuck did he overhear that? That place is bugged? Shit… the conversations I’ve had in there. Yikes.”

“Evidently. He says he was spying on a bartender who was stealing. It checks out because when he walked me to the bar to get my report about the red-shirted guy who got kicked out, he sent the bartender to his office with a security escort.”

“Holy shit. I’m really sorry for the shit I said.”

I shake my head. “You didn’t know.”

“God. I’m just… wow. So it ended badly after good sex?”

I frown, not answering.

“Decent sex at least?” she nudges, running a finger through her éclair and then licking the whipped cream off her fingertip.

I give her an incredulous look. “I know you’re not seriously asking me about the sex right now.”

She gives me a slow shrug.

“I mean… when you throw out terms like fulfilling my kinky sex bucket list you can’t be surprised I’d ask questions. The dick moves aside, was the dick good?”

I throw my head back out of frustration, but do it too hard and don’t hit the back of the couch like I would’ve in my old living room. This couch is low backed, so my head bonks off the wall. I hiss. So does Alannah.

“I don’t want to talk about that night with Derek. Not ever.” I rub the back of my head.

“Okay,” she says softly, but then adds, “Never ever?”

She nibbles her lip while waiting for my answer.

I scoff. “You’ve got three.”

She knows I mean I’ll answer three questions and that’s it.

“Was he good?” she asks, then takes another bite of her éclair.

“On a scale of one to ten?” I pause, then say, “forty-four thousand and sixty-nine.”

Her eyes bulge.

She chews what’s in her mouth, swallows, and asks, “Does he want to do it again?”

“Yes. But it won’t happen. It can’t, not even if he didn’t prove that he was a dick of the highest degree. Because the terms of the hall pass state that I can’t use it on the same person twice. But that doesn’t matter because I’m done with this hall pass business. It was a disaster. I’ve had a mental breakdown in the past two days because of it. I blubbered to Adam about not being cut out for this.”

Her eyes boing. “You told Adam?”

I nod and tilt my hand with a so-so gesture.

“This doesn’t count as my third question, Chlo. That’s a part b.”

I snicker, pull my black band out of my hair and then I redo my ponytail. “I burst into tears when Adam came home yesterday and didn’t want to talk about it but told him I’m not cut out for it.”

“So, you’re swearing off sex for the foreseeable future?”

“Is this your third question?” I ask.

“No. Second question, part c. Duh,” she says and takes another bite of her éclair.

“I don’t know. I don’t know anything right now. I’m taking it minute by minute. What’s your third question? Adam could be back any time.”

She considers this for a beat before asking, “What did he make you for breakfast?”

I blink a couple times. “What?”

She laughs. “I didn’t have three questions. I know we’ll talk about this later; you just need time with it.” She shrugs and opens the tab on her takeout coffee cup.

“Alannah?” I query.

Her eyes bounce to me.

“Did you not drop off breakfast to his place?”

She frowns.

What the fuck?

“He made me scrambled eggs.”

“Okay…”

“And rye toast.”

“Hm.”

“He had a jar of raspberry jam in his fridge.”

Her eyebrows go up.

I add, “Seedless raspberry jam.”

Her mouth forms into a letter O.

“And nothing else other than a fruit plate from the grocery store and the stuff for coffee along with some… like… random condiments. So I figured you got my text and dropped breakfast groceries at the door in the morning while I was still asleep or something and either you must have told him I’ll only eat eggs scrambled or he took a lucky guess. But the marble rye toast? The seedless jam? I figured that had to come from you.”

“No,” she whispers.

We stare at one another for a solid five seconds.

“You know much about him?” I ask.

“No. I do know he’s from one of the richest families in the state.”

“Can you look into this guy for me?” I ask softly.

“I’ll do that, hon.”

She looks freaked. And this tells me I have reasons to feel a little freaked, too.

Because how the fuck would Derek Steele know what sort of jam I like, what sort of toast I like? Who told him? Why would he go to that much trouble? And again, why tell me he knew things? His words before he left me crying in his laundry room ring in my mind.

“You deserve more than what he’s giving you.”

“I wanted to give you more. Give you everything you deserve.”

“I want more of it, Chloe. No, little bunny, I want all of it. All of it.”

“You agreed to make all my fantasies come true, Chloe. That’s what you’re gonna do.”

“Alannah…” I whisper and meet her gaze. “I think I’ve stirred up some sort of hornet’s nest here. He said some things that were a little…” I wince.

“Concerning?” she asks.

I nod.

“Like?” she prompts.

“Like when I told him I didn’t want to see him again he told me he’d give me space, but that he’d be in touch. He made a reference to the fact that I agreed to make all his fantasies come true and that it’s what I’m gonna do.”

Her eyes bulge.

My phone rings and it’s a jump-scare for both of us. I move to my desk and lift it.

Adam calling.

“Adam,” I mutter to Alannah and answer it.

“Hello?”

“Come outside!” he exclaims.

“What’s wrong?” I ask, panic spiking in me at the volume and pitch of his voice.

“Nothing! Just come. Hurry.” He ends the call.

“He wants me to come outside,” I say to Alannah, getting shoes on. “Not a word to Adam, okay?”

“No problem. I’ll report back ASAP with what I’m able to find out.”

“Be careful,” I whisper.

“You, too,” she says, squeezing my hand with a dark expression on her face.

When we get outside, Adam is waving at me from the driver’s seat of a van. He has a huge smile on his face. Paul is in the passenger seat.

My mouth drops open.

Adam lays on the horn with his palm, the biggest smile on his face I’ve seen since the day he proposed to me on the side of that mountain we hiked, when I said yes to his offer of a lifetime of adventure, side by side.

Paul says something to Adam, then hops out. “Hiya, Alannah! Hey, Chloe. Hop in!”

I rush to the passenger side and climb in. Adam is in his wheelchair. There’s no driver’s seat.

“Hand controls,” Adam says, then puckers for a kiss. I lean in. “Don’t even need help transferring in and out of the chair. Cool, right? The door opens up instead of out. There’s a swiveling ramp and everything.”

“Whoa!” I exclaim. “I had no idea there was a local rental company that had these.”

I realize Alannah is recording us with her phone.

“It’s mine. Paul did a fundraiser with our friends and relatives to get it for me.”

Adam looks emotional.

“I had no idea,” I say.

“He wanted to surprise us both. Get your seatbelt on, sweetheart.” He rolls his window down, “Hey Alannah, can you drive Paul back to his car? I was gonna ask Chloe, but now I can take my beautiful fiancée to lunch instead.”

“Of course,” Alannah agrees. “Nice ride!”

“Did you know about this?” I ask her.

She smiles, still holding up her phone.

“She’s one of the benefactors,” Paul states.

“Surprise!” she shouts.

“Thank you, Alannah. I can’t even…” Adam starts.

Alannah waves. “Don’t mention it.”

“Drive-thru all right?” Adam looks to me.

“A drive-thru sounds amazingly perfect,” I say softly.

He kisses me again. He’s got so much light and happiness in his eyes that I’m choked up.

I look at Paul and he’s smiling from ear to ear.

I place my palm against my chest as I give Paul a look that I hope shows my appreciation.

He looks away and chews his cheek; he’s biting back emotion, I can tell.

My eyes bounce to Alannah. She’s got watery-looking eyes, too.

“Lock up?” I ask.

Alannah gives me a thumbs up.

We’re in the parking lot of a nearby drive-thru burger place.

And sitting while eating burgers and fries, he tells me that having his independence back will make a huge difference to him. He tells me that the fundraiser didn’t cover everything, though, that Paul took on a loan for the rest.

“How much of a loan?” I ask.

“Twenty-eight K,” he says. “I’m gonna make the payments. I won’t let him do that. Things will be tight, but I can’t let him go into debt like that.”

“I got a ten-thousand-dollar bonus from work. I want you to put it toward that loan,” I say.

He looks surprised.

“I was going to tell you about it on Thursday. That’s why I came into your office before I went to the bookstore and…” I shrug.

“I was unapproachable,” he says. And then he reaches across and grabs my knee. “God, how have I hung onto you this long?”

I frown. “Don’t do that.”

He shakes his head. “My brother gave me a reality check on the weekend about you. Wasn’t the first time, either. I think it just took a minute to sink in.”

“A reality check?”

“He told me you were an angel, that I’m taking big chances by taking you for granted. He was right.”

“Tell me more,” I quip.

He laughs and then holds out an onion ring. I open my mouth and he feeds it to me.

After I swallow, I see a sober look on his face. He says, “Paul said everyone’s worried about you because I’m so closed-off. They can all see it’s taking a toll on you. I’m sorry. I’m gonna be better.”

I give his hand a squeeze.

We get back into the house and as I’m locking the door, he’s looking at me expectantly.

I raise my eyebrows in question.

“You’re more than just the person I wanna marry. You’re also my best friend,” he tells me. “No matter what. I love you and I don’t ever want you to forget how much you mean to me.”

“Stop being so gushy or you’re gonna make me cry,” I warn.

“If we don’t work out, Chloe, I just want you to know how much you being here for me through everything means.”

“Stop,” I say.

He doesn’t say anything for a minute. He’s searching my face. And now I’m wondering if he wants reassurance from me on the ‘if we don’t work out’ bit.

“You okay today? Better, or?”

“I’m hangin’ in,” I tell him.

“We’re gonna make it, I think,” he tells me. “If you haven’t given up on me, that is.”

Yep, he’s fishing for confirmation. For guarantees. And I’m feeling a little…numb. But he needs something here, so I answer softly with, “Of course I haven’t.” But my chin trembles and I think he sees the fear, the uncertainty in my eyes. I see it in his, too. But I see more emotion than I’ve seen, ever, too, and I’m hopeful that it means something good.

“If you change your mind and want to talk about the weekend, I’m here,” he tells me.

I nod.

“If you decide you wanna try that again, you can. I know how upset you were, but I want you to know that for now, those terms still stand. If you decide you don’t, I won’t push.”

“Okay,” I say after a minute of stunned silence.

“I still think we should sit down Sunday and talk about setting a wedding date. Talk about how we both feel at that point. Work for you?” he asks.

“Yeah,” I say softly.

But I’m not sure it does. I’m not sure of anything right now.

Seeming satisfied, he smiles. “Good. Okay, gotta go call my editor. Can I have a kiss?”

I lean down and kiss him softly. He holds my hand while I do.

“Love you,” he whispers.

“Love you,” I parrot. “I’ll transfer you the ten thousand for Paul now, okay?”

“You sure?”

“I’m sure,” I say.