Chapter 27 Years From Now
Chapter twenty-seven
Years From Now
Shepherd Kingsley
I watch, mesmerized, as Jasmine expertly kneads the pasta dough.
The same hands that tied this awful apron around me.
And touched my mouth. It physically hurts to restrain myself from kissing her, but I’ve had a lot of time to think over the past few days, and I don’t think I should.
Not until she knows about the rule Bash put in place, anyway.
And telling her about that isn’t going to be easy after hearing how she feels indebted to him.
There are too many risks right now. I don’t feel ready to face them, not when she just started opening up and relaxing more. If I tell her, I’ll be admitting I want something more. And if she doesn’t turn me down, we’ll have to figure out how to handle things without me losing my spot on the team.
“Okay.” Jasmine calls me out of my spiral. “Now we let the dough rest for thirty minutes while we make the sauce.”
I glance at the clock but don’t say anything.
I’ve got practice in a little while, but I don’t want her worried about time.
I like this unhurried side of Jasmine. It makes me wonder what our days would be like if we had even more time.
My offseason isn’t free by any means, but it’s a little slower.
I smile as I imagine hours in the kitchen together watching her in her element, taking breaks to play chess.
Perfect. It would be perfect. The only thing that would make it better is the idea of setting her onto this counter and kissing her breathless.
“I’m going to chop the onion because I don’t trust you with a knife,” she says with a smirk. “Can you put a little olive oil in the pot and turn the stove on high?”
“Normally I’d be offended by you doubting me, but in this case, I agree with your choice,” I say, making her laugh.
Every time I hear her giggle, my world turns golden and shimmering. This fuzzy, hazy feeling takes over my senses, and all I can do is wear a dumbstruck smile.
She grabs a cutting board from a cabinet, then pulls a large sleeved knife out of a drawer.
The blade glints in the kitchen light, and I don’t have to be anywhere near it to tell how sharp it is.
I turn my attention to the bottle of oil by the pot.
I pour what I think is a little, then turn the heat to high.
“Are you ready for the game this weekend?” Jasmine asks as she cuts a peeled onion in half.
Her movements are precise and quick. She dices the onion ten times faster than I’ve ever chopped anything in my life.
I don’t know how anyone could say she isn’t a chef after watching her do that, but maybe I’m a little biased.
“I think so. Carolina is a great team, but we’ve been working hard at practice and watching tape of their games. I think with the right game plan we can beat them.”
“That’s good. I know you guys will do great. Bash said you were totally in sync last game.”
“You talked to him?” I ask, trying to keep my tone casual.
She walks over and looks in the pot, then adds a touch more olive oil. “I went over to his and MJ’s house for a family dinner last night. Everyone was talking about how great the game was. Well, after they got done pestering me with questions about getting hit.”
I frown at the memory. “How are you doing after that? Still sore?”
She shakes her head. “Not really. The bruise is still a little tender, though.”
“Is it pretty bad?” I ask.
She lifts the side of her camisole. The gesture feels intimate, though I know it’s not meant to be. A dark purple tinged in yellow-green stains her ribcage. I reach out impulsively and trail my fingertips lightly along the center of the bruise. She sucks in a breath and I jerk my hand away.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“You didn’t,” she whispers.
Our eyes meet, and I swallow at the heat I see burning in hers.
It would be so easy to close the distance between us and kiss her.
My body aches as pure want sears my veins.
I take a step. Her lashes flutter. And then my phone starts buzzing on the counter.
The loud noise jolts us out of the moment.
We both glance at the screen. A picture of me and Willow lights up my phone.
She’s in her wedding dress, smooshing my cheeks together with one hand while laughing.
“Does that say William?” Jasmine asks with a laugh. Her voice is a little off, breathless in a way that lets me know she felt what I did.
I let out a raspy chuckle. “Uh, yeah, it’s a funny story. I should get this, though, in case something is wrong.”
Jasmine nods in understanding and I answer the phone.
“Hey, William.”
Willow’s tinkling laughter comes through the phone. “That never gets old, no matter what your brother thinks.”
“I agree,” I say with a smile. “You sound like everything is alright?” I phrase my statement like a question.
“Oh, yeah! I actually have great news. I got your parents to agree to come to the game this weekend!”
I stiffen. “That is great news.”
She sighs at the obvious tension in my voice.
“I know things aren’t great between you guys, but they’re starting to try.
I told them this was a big one and that we would be there, and they agreed to sit in the box with us.
Since it’s a bye week for Jase, we can all get dinner together on Sunday as a family after you win. ”
My chest feels like a linebacker is sitting on it. I rake a hand through my hair. With everything going on, the last thing I need is the pressure of not only my brother, but my parents watching.
Jasmine eyes me from where she’s standing at the stove. I don’t meet her gaze.
“That sounds nice,” I manage to get out.
“If you don’t want them there, I can tell them another weekend would be better. It’s not like they understand what games matter anyway.” I can picture her rolling her eyes. “But I think it would be good for you and Jason both to spend some time with them.”
When Willow married my brother, she started advocating for us both to my parents.
Jason told me about how she stood up to our mom and called her out on being unsupportive.
Since then, she’s been trying to rebuild our family, but I don’t know if it’s working.
My parents still don’t care enough to learn anything about football or call more than once every couple of months to check in.
Willow’s family is the opposite of ours, so I think she feels guilty that we don’t have what she does and is trying to make up for it.
It’s a kind gesture, but I don’t think it’s going to end how she hopes.
I want to tell her no, but besides Jason, she’s the only family I have. If this is important to her, then it should be important to me.
“No, you’re right, it would be good to have them there. Thanks, Willow. You’re the best sister.”
“I’m always going to fight for you,” she says with a conviction that makes my eyes sting. If only I could tell her what she was fighting for is a lost cause and makes things worse for me.
“Thanks,” I choke out.
“I’ll see you this weekend, okay? It’s going to be great, I just know it. Love you, Shep.”
“Love you too, William,” I say, hearing her laugh again before we hang up.
I set the phone down on the counter. Jasmine started sautéing the onions, and that’s the only sound in the kitchen for a little while. I scrub my hands over my face, thankful I cleaned the flour off it earlier so it wouldn’t be in my eyes.
“You okay?” Jasmine asks softly.
I sigh. “Not really, no.” I look at her and note the concern in her gaze. “I want to tell you why, but it feels dumb after what you told me about your life.”
She frowns. “You can tell me anything. Just because I had something terrible happen in my life, doesn’t mean you have to hold back.”
I take in a breath, the tension in my chest making it difficult.
I know I’ll feel better if I get it out.
“My parents aren’t supportive of me playing football—or in general, really.
They made sure we had what we needed when we were younger, but they never went beyond that.
No family dinners or game nights or matching T-shirts. ”
Something in Jasmine’s expression makes me think she’s experienced all those things and more.
“When Willow married my brother, she started trying to get them to come to games and be more involved. They agreed to come this weekend. Which I should be happy about, but—” I push my hands into my hair and tug on the roots.
“I’m not. I wish they weren’t coming. And I kind of wish Jason wasn’t going to be there either.
” I shake my head, letting out a bitter laugh.
“All I ever wanted was a big family to come to my games, but now that I’m going to have that, I feel like I can’t breathe. ”
I rasp in a breath. Jasmine reaches up. Her hands frame my face, grounding me. I meet her shining emerald eyes.
“You’re okay,” she murmurs. “Breathe with me.”
She draws in an audible breath, and I follow her. After we take a few together, she removes her hands. But before I can mourn the loss of her touch, she wraps her arms around my waist in a tight hug. I tense at the surprising gesture, then wrap my arms around her and close my eyes.
“I’m sorry your parents didn’t love you the way you deserved,” she says against my chest.
I can’t tell if her words are ripping me apart or putting me back together. My heart is racing, and I wonder if she can hear it.
“You don’t owe them anything. You don’t have to spend time with them or talk to them. But if you want a future with them in it, then I think your sister-in-law did the right thing.”
I draw in a shaky breath. “What if everything goes wrong?”
She rubs my back. “I don’t think it will. I think you’re going to have a great game and then a nice time celebrating with the people you love. But if it all goes up in flames, you can call me, and we’ll drown your sorrows in pasta.”
I chuckle. She tilts her head back to look up at me but doesn’t step out of my arms.
“Thanks, Chef,” I say in a soft voice.
She scrunches her nose, but replies, “Anytime, Captain.”
I let out a sigh, feeling the tightness behind my sternum dissipate. “I really wish I wasn’t wearing an apron right now.”
She giggles. “Why? I think it’s cute.”
I roll my eyes. “Because I’m going to want to look back on this moment, and I’d like to be able to picture myself at least looking tough while I blubbered like a baby.”
“You didn’t blubber. I would have made fun of you if you did. The same way I’m going to make fun of you for that apron when I remind you of this moment years from now,” she says as she steps back.
Years from now. Warmth spreads through me.
She said it so casually, as if it were a guarantee.
I watch her pick up a wooden spoon, and suddenly my worries drift away like a leaf on the breeze.
I can shoulder the weight of the world again once I leave here.
For now, there’s only this moment, here with her. That’s all I want to think about.