Chapter Thirty
CHEV
THIS IS THE best day of my life.
I force myself to remain still as Vanessa pulls back the sheets and climbs into bed. It’s been a long time since I’ve slept on a mattress that fits me, and the fact that I now get to do so with my mate is better than I ever could’ve imagined.
Vanessa clears her throat as her leg brushes against mine.
“Are you wearing underwear?” she asks.
I huff. “Of course I am.”
And I hate it, too. The damn fabric is constricting, and it’s prohibiting my thighs from breathing. I won’t be surprised if I wake up needing an amputation. My limbs have no blood flow, but I’ll suffer if it keeps Vanessa comfortable.
“I thought you hated normal clothing?” Vanessa asks.
She’s smirking, and I roll my eyes as I realize she’s making fun of me. She knows I hate when she refers to the clothing worn by the other breeds as “normal.” My leathers are normal, and they’re by far the most comfortable.
I have room for movement in them.
“My legs are shriveling up as we speak,” I say.
My smile grows when Vanessa lets out a proper laugh and snuggles against my chest. She’s everything, and I wrap my arm around her head and urge her to come closer. I want every inch of my body pressed against hers.
The pajamas she wears are soft, and I’m happy she decided not to wear the ones with lace. They’re my favorite to look at, but they’re itchy. I don’t want them rubbing against me in the middle of the night.
Vanessa tangles her leg with mine, and I stiffen when she hooks her finger into the waistband of my underwear. What’s she doing? She gives the elastic a gentle tug, her heart pounding so loud, I can hear it from here.
“Take them off,” she whispers.
A small part of me knows I should question her statement and confirm she’s okay with me being naked beside her, but my desperation to free my limbs has me yanking the offending fabric down and kicking it off my feet without a second thought.
I sprawl out the second I’m freed.
“Do you feel better?” Vanessa asks.
I nod. “So much.”
Vanessa seems pleased, and I remain painfully still as she lifts the covers and peers underneath. She’s in a good mood tonight, but I’m sure not going to complain. I stare at the side of her head as she looks over my bare body. I’m neither shy nor insecure, but I can’t say I’m not nervous. If she doesn’t like how I look, I might die.
She purses her lips and cocks her head to the side. I have no idea what it means.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you completely soft before,” she eventually says.
I tuck my chin into my chest and stare down at myself. I’m not in my most impressive state right now, but I was under the impression it wasn’t needed. Our cuddling isn’t sexual, but that can be changed if she requests it.
“I can fix that,” I say, directing my gaze to Vanessa’s breasts.
It’s the quickest way to make me hard.
Vanessa shakes her head, her eyes widening as she watches me stiffen.
“Oh, no, it’s not a bad thing,” she says. I don’t believe her, not one bit, and I lick my lips as I watch her nipples stiffen through her shirt. “I was just making an observation.”
An observation she’ll never make again. I will remain hard for my mate—every minute of every second of every day.
Vanessa drops the sheet, hiding me from her view.
“Chev,” she scolds.
I shrug.
“I enjoy it when you’re soft,” she says. My female is a very skilled liar.
I gesture toward the blankets.
“But you like it better when it’s hard,” I say.
Vanessa sighs. “I like it both ways for very different reasons. Now, will you fix it?”
I suck my cheeks into my mouth. Fix it? My erection is not some broken object to be fixed. I love my mate, but sometimes, I don’t think she respects my penis as much as I do.
“I worship your breasts and slit, but all you’ve done tonight is insult my manhood,” I say.
I’m teasing her, and I smile so she knows I’m not being serious. Vanessa wrinkles her nose, an action she loves to do when she’s annoyed with me, and my smile grows when she reaches out and flicks my forehead.
“My mate is unsatisfied with my body and my offerings…” I sigh, throwing an arm over my face. “I am a worthless male, undeserving of love and—”
My dramatics are cut short when Vanessa launches herself at me. She forces my arm away from my face and leans so far over me that her hair tickles my cheeks. I love it, and she glares down at me before flopping back onto her side.
I look forward to annoying her for the rest of our lives.
After a few seconds, Vanessa peers underneath the sheets once more. I knew it was coming, and I fight a smile as she looks over my softened length. She’s interested in my body in all its different states, just as I am in hers.
Our bond hums, and I hope she enjoys the quiet noises my bear forces out of me as I relax into the sheets. The bed smells like her, and it’s comforting. She must feel the same way about me, as it only takes her minutes to fall asleep.
The second I hear her first snore, I turn and kiss the top of her head. I love her, even if it means I never experience a night of blissful sleep again.
It’s hard to fall into a deep rest when she’s near, my body on high alert, but I’m hoping that lessens over time. This is new to me, and the unknown upsets my bear. Eventually, I give in and drag Vanessa on top of me, finding the most comfort when her body is sprawled entirely over mine.
The action wakes her slightly, and she lifts her head with a quiet groan. There’s a bit of drool on her chin, and she wipes it with the back of her hand before dropping her head back onto my shoulder.
So fucking adorable.
I’m pretty sure I’ve only gotten an hour of proper rest when the sun begins to shine through my window, but I’ve spent many hours staring at my mate, so I’d say it’s well worth it.
“Good morning,” I say the moment Vanessa stirs.
She grunts and rolls off me. The action shoves her knee into my balls, but I manage to hide my pain as she rubs her eyes and drags a pillow over her face.
“I think I love you most when you’re sleepy,” I say.
Vanessa ignores me, so I throw my leg over her waist and sit atop her stomach. Her eyes creak open and briefly fall to my abs, and I flex them until her cheeks grow red. This is the attention I was looking for.
“What time is it?” she asks.
I shrug. “Early.”
“How early?”
“You don’t need to be up for another thirty minutes.”
Vanessa drops her hands to my thighs, her fingers dangerously close to my exposed manhood. I do my best to ignore it as she rubs her thumbs back and forth over my upper thighs, not wanting to ruin the moment.
She’s doing it out of instinct, and my bear seems to like it, if his annoying purring is anything to go by. Vanessa’s lips twitch as the noises pour from my chest, my female always finding humor in my bear.
Despite how much the noises bother me, I no longer hold them back.
Several minutes pass before I work up the strength to get up. Vanessa rolls her head to the side, lazily watching me stand and dress. My best pair of leathers is dirty, and I dig through my drawers before finding my second-best pair.
“Would you ever consider wearing leathers?” I ask.
I busy myself with the ties so Vanessa doesn’t feel too much pressure to answer, but I’m sure she can tell I’m eager to hear her response. I’ll understand if her answer is no, but I hope she considers it.
Vanessa throws her legs over the side of the bed and stands.
“I’m not comfortable showing that much skin,” she says.
She steps forward and peers into the drawer where I keep mine.
I already had a pair made for her, and I duck my head as she reaches in and pulls them out. She fingers the fabric, and I clear my throat as I take them from her and put them back in the drawer. I’m embarrassed, and I want to hide them away. She wasn’t supposed to see them.
“Are those for me?” she asks.
I shrug.
“I’m not upset you don’t want to wear them,” I say. “I just thought it would be nice to have a pair ready in case you ever do.”
Vanessa rests her cheek against my shoulder. “I wouldn’t mind wearing them for you in our home, but not outside in public.”
Our bond pulsates. I love that, and I find my hands are shaking as I yank open the drawer and grab the pair of female leathers I just hid from her. I want to see them on her…urgently.
“May I?” I ask.
Vanessa giggles, her eyes wide as I lift her sleep dress up and over her head. I don’t think she minds me seeing her bare, but I still keep my gaze averted as I wrap the leather top around her chest. It pushes her breasts together, drawing attention to them, and I tie it just tight enough to stay up.
The skirt is next. I wrap it around her waist before tying the overlapping ends together.
Fuck.
Vanessa tugs at the bottom of the skirt before turning and looking in the mirror. Her cheeks are flushed, and she runs her hands over her exposed midsection before skimming them over her chest.
“I’m happy I’m the only male who will ever see you in these,” I admit.
Leathers fit differently on shifter women. They don’t have nearly as much curvature to their bodies as Vanessa, so the leathers cover more. Vanessa is spilling out of the top and bottom. This is for my eyes only.
Vanessa fights back a smile as she looks at herself, and I do the same. She looks good, and I think she knows it.
“I’ll wear them for you this morning,” she says.
I’ve never heard better words, and I happily follow her into the kitchen. She doesn’t have to be at work for another hour, and I’m looking forward to spending the morning with her.
“Are you hungry?” Vanessa asks.
What a silly question. “I’m always hungry.”
It’s the truth, too. I’ve always had a large appetite, and when it comes to Vanessa’s cooking, I fear it has no limits. I’d eat anything she made, and I’d do so happily. Everything is so good, and it makes my kitchen skills feel inadequate.
Vanessa looks in the pantry, her eyebrows furrowed. I stocked it before her arrival, so it should be full of everything she needs. I took the liberty of searching her kitchen back in Wrath so I knew what kinds of ingredients and products she enjoys.
“I’m going to hunt you an ucka,” I say. “Soon.”
It’s this week’s number-one priority. Finding an ucka large enough to honor my mate may take days, so I need to begin tracking as soon as possible. It’s tradition, and I won’t disappoint. I’ll get her one twice as large as the one my father brought my mother when they first mated.
“I’m excited,” Vanessa says. “I’ve never tried it before, but I’ve read it’s a shifter favorite.”
It’s the shifter favorite, and it’s incredibly hard to get. Only the strongest shifters are big and fast enough to take down an adult ucka. Several men in my pack choose to hunt in groups, but as alpha, it’s expected I go on my own.
It’s one way I prove my strength to my people.
I sit at the kitchen island while Vanessa pulls two wooden bowls out of my cabinet.
“I might be working late tonight,” she says. “I have a lot to catch up on after taking most of yesterday off. Would you mind meeting me at the portal so I don’t have to walk through the shifter lands alone? I don’t think I’m quite ready for that.”
I purse my lips. Meet her at the portal?
“Aren’t you going to be working with me?” I ask. I was under the impression we would be sharing my office until I fully transitioned my work to Echo. I only have a few weeks left before I’m officially done. Vanessa and I should enjoy it while we can.
Vanessa shakes her head. “Not today. I need to work out of Wrath.”
I hum, and Vanessa pats my hand before turning away and pulling open my fridge. I’m displeased.
“So, will you meet me at the portal?” she repeats.
“Of course,” I say. She doesn’t need to ask. “But tomorrow, you’ll come to work with me?”
Vanessa nods. “Yes. I’ll work with you tomorrow.”
Good.