Chapter 7
DARREN
It doesn’t hit me until I get home.
The bitter churn of nausea in my stomach sends me straight to the bathroom. I hit my knees on the tile in front of the toilet and throw up. The smoke clinging to my clothes and hair makes everything worse. I squeeze my eyes shut and grip the back of the toilet. It’s so cool against my hot palms.
By the time I’m finished, it’s hard to swallow past the burn in my throat. I struggle to my feet and use a sweaty hold on the vanity to haul myself to the sink. The water I splash on my face doesn’t get colder, no matter how long I leave the right tap running.
I turn it off and heave over the sink, refusing to look into the mirror. What I’d find in my reflection would ruin me. Fray the last of my resolve and leave me broken on the floor.
Delaney shouldn’t have been there. Fuck, I’d have preferred her anywhere else.
She’s avoided me like the plague for months since the last time we saw each other, but there she was, watching me fail to save the only place that hadn’t erased the story of us. Decades’ worth of memories gone up in flames. Just like that.
“Want a beer? ”
Lifting my head, I look at where Bryce is standing in the hall, watching me.
“I thought you’d be asleep by now,” I say, voice shot to hell.
“Unlikely. Abbie went back to bed after you left, and I haven’t heard her move since.”
“Thank you for coming. I know it’s late.”
That’s an understatement. Abbie’s going to be up for school soon, the sun already cresting over the horizon.
She shifts to give me room to exit the bathroom and follows me into the kitchen. I go right for the coffee machine. It’s already full and ready.
“Don’t apologize for that. It was bad, right?” she asks.
I pour myself a cup of the fresh coffee and leave it black. “It’s gone, B. All of it.”
“Shit.”
“Caleb’s got the station there for a few more hours, cleaning up the debris. I couldn’t stay.”
My best friend steps in front of me and takes my mug of coffee away to set it on the counter. She confirms how messed up I look when she wraps her arms around me and gives me a rare hug.
I tense my jaw as a wave of emotion rolls over me. Returning the hug, I cling to her a bit tighter than I would have normally.
“Do you have any Baileys to put in that coffee?” she mutters into my shoulder.
“I doubt I’d keep it down.”
With a heavy exhale, Bryce pulls back and stares up at me with blue eyes focused enough they can dissect my every thought.
“Should I ask?”
“Ask what?”
She scowls, handing me back my coffee. “Don’t play dumb. You know exactly what I’m talking about. I remember you asking me these same questions when it came to Daisy.”
“That was different. The two of you were always different. ”
“Fuck that. I can still stand here and ask you how you’re feeling and what you’re thinking. The drive-in was your place, D. It belonged to you two. The rest of us were always just visitors.”
I pull away from her and leave the kitchen. She doesn’t let me get away. When I sit on the couch, she joins me, keeping a further distance now.
“She was there,” I say, dropping the words into the silence.
“There . . . at the drive-in?”
“At the drive-in. Watching as it burned and we failed to save it.”
That haunted look in her eyes as she stared at me followed me home. It reminded me of the last time I saw her before Abbie was born.
“By the time we got there, it was already up in flames. The projection room went first, then it just collapsed. There’s nothing left, Bryce. Nothing.”
She remains silent for a second, hands fidgeting with her long black hair. “Can it be rebuilt?”
I don’t mean to laugh, but it comes out anyway. Bitter and dark. “With what money?”
“I could talk to my dad. Tell him how important the drive-in was to the town,” she offers.
“No offense to your dad, but he never gave a shit about that place. It didn’t go up in flames on its own. Our guess is someone tossed a blunt, and it caught on the old wood. The town let it get to that point, B.”
The mayor saw it as a waste of space and money. Most of the town did. Hell, even I’d written it off for too long.
“I know. That doesn’t mean I couldn’t try and convince him to change his mind.”
“And if you did? Then what?”
She stretches her legs out and lets her head fall back against the couch. “I don’t know. You could help me instead of pissing all over my parade.”
“How? ”
Her brow lifts when she looks at me. “That depends on how badly you want it fixed.”
“What would be the point?”
“Darren,” she says pointedly. ‘I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt because you’ve been up all night, but are you being serious?”
I scrub a hand down my face. “You’re not talking about the drive-in.”
“Thanks, genius.”
“There’s no fixing what happened with Delaney. She hates me, and I don’t blame her for it.”
Bryce reaches over and shoves at my arm, scowling. “I never took you for a quitter.”
“I’m not. I’m just realistic. Yesterday was the first time I’ve spoken to her since your opening day at the shop, and it was just as awkward. She would have slammed her classroom door in my face if we were alone.”
I leave out the part about me begging her to see me outside of school. That was just way too desperate. I don’t know what we would have even spoken about.
“I never knew you spoke at the shop.”
I stiffen.
“It was brief.”
She eliminates the empty cushion between us, tucking a leg beneath her as she leans over. “Spill it.”
“Since when are you a gossiper?”
“Since now. Don’t turn this on me.”
If Bryce is one thing, it’s stubborn. Too damn stubborn for her or anyone else’s good. Once she sets her mind on something, that’s the end of it. It’s suddenly my least favourite quality about her.
I play it safe with my explanation. If she knew everything that was said or the way those words left me feeling, she’d never let this go.
I still haven’t .
“I told her I was sorry to hear about her grandmother. She thanked me.”
There’s a subtle fall of her lips before she asks, “That’s it?”
“Sorry to disappoint.”
“Fuck off. That doesn’t change anything.”
“There isn’t anything to change, Bryce. We’re the past.”
“You can still fix the drive-in. If you won’t do it for yourself, do it for Abbie. Don’t you want her to be able to grow up watching movies there like we did?”
I glare at her. “Don’t bring my daughter into this.”
“Isn’t she already in this? I’d say that she’s the most important part in what happened?—”
“Leave it alone. There’s no point in entertaining the thought of rebuilding the drive-in unless there’s some sort of approval from your father.”
“Okay, so once I have it?”
“Why is this so important to you?” I ask, startling myself with the question.
Bryce absorbs it, not letting my shitty attitude affect her. “If there was even the smallest chance that she’d forgive you, would you want it?”
There’s no question. Even after all this time.
“You know I would.”
“Then I’ll talk to my dad, and when I get a yes, you need to promise me that you’ll do whatever it takes to get the drive-in rebuilt.”
I hate how skeptical I am, but there’s no fighting it off yet. “Fixing the drive-in won’t make her forgive me, Bryce.”
“No, but the process could help show her why she should.”
“You want me to use this as a way to get back in her good graces?”
“We both know an approval from my dad won’t do much more than kick-start the permit process for a renovation. So, we’ll need the town to help build it. Volunteer or some shit like that. The fire station could help, right? ”
“I’d have to talk to Caleb before answering that. But still, I don’t know if the town cares enough to try.”
“They will.”
“She’s not coming back to me, Bryce.”
“Don’t.”
I shake my head, the constant throb behind my ribs growing in intensity. “It’s been eight years.”
“And you’re still lost without her.”
Sucking in a sharp breath, I glance up at the ceiling. “It doesn’t matter how many times I tell myself that she’s gone, I still want to bring her home to me.”
“It’s not too late to try.”
“It was too late the moment I let her go.”
“I don’t believe that.”
“You’re supposed to be the doom-and-gloom one of us. Go back to that,” I mutter.
“That’s the way I prefer things, but you’ve decided to steal my entire personality today. Give it back and we’ll see.”
“Can we just talk about this more later?”
“If that’s what you want,” she relents, albeit reluctantly.
“I need to shower before Abbie gets up.”
Nodding, she glances at the time on her phone. “Yeah, Daisy’s already awake.”
“Go have breakfast with her before she heads to work,” I tell her, pushing off the couch. “And thank you. For coming to watch Abbie and for this. I’m sorry that I couldn’t . . . I can’t talk about it all right now.”
“Don’t apologize. You dealt with a lot tonight already.”
“Yeah. It was a night.”
“I love you,” she says, startling me.
Bryce has said that to me plenty of times over the years, but ever since she’s fallen in love with Daisy, it’s been more often. The sunshine woman she now calls her fiancée has brought my icy best friend out of her shell in the best ways .
I offer her a hand and tug her up before stealing another hug. “I love you too.”
“I’ll keep you posted. Don’t ignore me when I text, or I’ll come back over here and kick your ass.”
“I believe you.”
“Good.” She shoves out of my arms and gives my cheek a pat. “The mustache looks good, by the way.”
“Garrison told me it looked like a rat on my lip.”
“Garrison lacks taste.”
I snort. “Have you told him that?”
“Too many times to count. So, don’t take his criticisms to heart. It looks good on you. Daisy was gushing about it the other day.”
“Oh, good. Were you jealous?”
“Of you? Not a chance.”
“Ouch.”
“Didn’t you already get enough compliments from me?”
“I figured you were changing into the warm and fuzzy type, that’s all,” I tease, some of the pain in my chest easing for the time being.
“Now I’m leaving. Walk me out?”
I do so without hesitation. She shoves her feet and the hems of her long PJ pants into the black boots she wore over. I hide a laugh behind a cough.
“Drive safe, Ice,” I say.
She gives me a long look, checking me over before nodding. “I’ll text you.”
“I’ll be on the lookout.”
And I am. The text that comes in exactly five hours later sends a zap of fear through me from head to toe.
Bryce : Drive-in is a go. Time to talk to Caleb.