Chapter 7 Daisy
The last of the family was Manny and Stella.
They were of Puerto Rican descent, and social workers were still trying to find their relatives.
They were found in front of a church with a letter and nothing else.
Eric hoped they didn’t find any relatives because he liked having them around.
He was trying to learn everything he could about Puerto Rico so he could make Stella feel safe.
I saw Janie peeking through the door when he was talking, low and carefully like his adoptive father. Her face was full of pride. A few days later, Eric was discharged, and Janie and I were relegated to phone catch ups. Or so I thought.
* * *
A week after I last saw Eric and Janie, I stumbled out of the hospital with still half of my Stanley cup filled with coffee. Half good because we were too busy to take breaks. Half bad because damn I had needed the caffeine during the night shift, not now.
I stifled a yawn and checked my phone. Janie had sent a text.
Hey Daiz, can you call me when you get this? It’s urgent. Don’t worry about waking me, I’m used to it with the kids.
I put my mug on top of the car as I unlocked it, and then called Janie.
“Hey Mumma,” I greeted her as I opened the door.
“Hey Daiz, just let me get out here.” I heard her mumble to someone, and then some sounds of movement. I took the opportunity to grab my cup and climb inside the car.
“Ok, I’m all good,” she said.
“You said to call you?” I reminded her.
“Yeah.” She sighed. “You remember how I said I’d keep your secret and not let anyone know where you are?”
“Yeah,” I said, starting to get nervous.
“Well, we…Eric, Perez–sorry Bull–and I…we’ve been doing that.” She paused. “But…”
“Yes?” I prompted her.
“Your dad is sick, Daisy…real sick. I thought I’d let you know. He’s gotten bad and is pretty much permanently in the hospital. I’m–I’m not sure how much longer he’s got, and I don’t want you to miss out on saying goodbye.”
I was glad I wasn’t driving yet. I’d forgotten about Dad’s illness. He had been stabilised and was on a plan to stop smoking when I left. Then with all the chaos, and the fact that Blaze was more family to them than I was, I had just pushed the thoughts of my parents out of my mind.
“It’s looking pretty serious Daiz. Your mom is, well…” Janie seemed to struggle finding the words.
“Mom is delusional that he’s going to be fine and someone’s going to magically snap their fingers and nothing will be wrong with Dad.” I groaned, rubbing my forehead.
Janie gave a nervous laugh.
“Yeah, that’s pretty much it.” She took a breath. “It might be the last time you can see him, Daiz. I know you couldn’t before you left last time. I didn’t know if it would matter to you.”
I gripped the steering wheel to ground myself and drew in a breath through my nose. I wasn’t feeling tired anymore. Weary, yes, but not tired.
Janie continued. “Perez and I, well it is a bit crowded here, but you’re welcome to stay here if you want to come and visit, or there’s the clubhouse.”
“No thanks to the clubhouse.” I was quick to reply to that last suggestion.
“We made some big changes there, Daiz. It’s a safe place now.” She chuckled. “There’s also Midwife’s place. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind you staying in a spare room. He lives alone and really spends more time over here anyway.”
“Midwife?” I asked, the name tickling my fatigued brain.
“He was the prospect who was with you when you gave birth to Baby James. He’s VP now.”
I remembered the calm grey eyes and strong arms holding me, and the low voice that kept me from falling apart. The features that haunted my dreams every now and then.
“I remember him,” I replied. “How did he get the road name of Midwife?”
Janie chuckled sadly. “Someone used it as an insult against him, so he took it and owned it. It suits him. He cares.”
A strong feeling of yearning ached in me as I thought about him. I shook my head. I’d probably built him up into a hero and he probably wouldn’t have the same good memories.
“How about we play it by ear, Janie. I’ll head back into work and first see how much time I can take off. I’ll call you after I know more,” I replied to Janie.
“Okay Honey, I’ll be waiting.” She hung up.
I sat for a moment, trying to take it in.
My dad had gotten sicker. He and Mom probably had ignored medical advice and gotten worse, which I should have expected.
My parents lived in a world of their own that only Blaze understood.
I’d left so quickly 4 years ago that I hadn’t even said goodbye to my family, and I couldn’t call them.
He and Mom were too tight with Blaze for me to remain in contact with them.
They would have told him exactly where I was, and encouraged him to bring me back to the person I was when I left.
But for all their faults, they were my parents.
I would likely regret not saying goodbye.
I got out of the car and headed back in to talk to the Nurse Unit Manager about leave.
Two hours and 4 cups of coffee later, I had the car packed. I called Janie just after I started the car.
“Hey Mumma, letting you know I’m on my way.”
“Wait, what? Are you driving? Didn’t you say you worked last night?”
“Yeah, but I’ve got coffee, so I’ll be fine.”
“Oh hell no. I’ll call Midwife to arrange for someone to come and drive you.”
“Janie, who the hell do you think you’re talking to?”
We’d both changed. The old Janie wouldn’t have tried to boss me around. She would have hidden behind Bull and gotten him to offer the driver. The old me would have taken it.
“A precious fucking flower,” she snapped back at me.
“I don’t want Blaze knowing I’m coming.” The humor was out of my voice in that sentence.
I heard her huff.
“Ok, no driver. Just get here safely. And keep me updated. I want check-ins, and I’m putting you to bed the minute you arrive. I’ll get the boys to keep an eye out for you,” she conceded.
I agreed and then pulled out of the driveway of my apartment block and headed home.
I took the shortest route, in the longest time, checking in with Janie at every stop.
I eventually regretted saying no to that driver.
But the independence in me was strong these days.
Eventually, I finally pulled into the driveway of Bull’s new house.
It was a 6 bedroom ranch style house set on a large block. Kids bikes and toys littered the yard.
Janie ran out to greet me with a big hug.
Motherhood suited her so much, and I finally got to meet all the other children.
Eric looked a lot happier. He had looked a lot younger than his 8 years on that hospital bed, but now I could see his fire.
The arm looked like it was setting well.
He dragged forward his biological brother, Trey, who was 6.
Trey was obviously his brother’s shadow.
Then came Estella, or Stella. She was Hispanic, and Manny’s older sister at 4 years of age. And the fifth child was an African American girl with gorgeously decorated corn rows.
“Hi, I’m Daisy two.” She held up 2 fingers as she said that. “Everyone calls me D2…because I got two moms.”
I crouched down to her. “Really?” I asked, glancing up at Janie who was smiling sadly.
“Yep, my real momma is in hospice care, and our adopted momma is here…and she looks after real Momma when she can.”
“Wow, you are really lucky D2,” I said to her.
She grinned so brightly and then ran to grab another child.
This 3 year old red-headed boy looked at me with soulful blue eyes and a face shape that I was all too familiar with.
I’d married someone with a face like that, and as far as I knew, he had no siblings.
Which meant that this was Blaze’s child.
D2 was oblivious to the sudden tension in my face.
“And this is Dylan Blaze Lovelace. He don’t have no Momma cause she died.”
Janie looked horrified. “When did you arrive, Dylan? Does your dad know you’re here?”
He nodded shyly and sidled up to her. “Granny’s at the doctors,” he stage-whispered.
“Ok Honey, you’re all good. I’m just going to give your dad a call to check.” She stepped away and called. She didn’t even say hello. She just launched into a tirade. “Did it ever occur to you to ask if you could drop your son off? I have a family and obligations!”
She listened to the response. “Uh huh, so it was an emergency for them. You still had time to call.” She sighed heavily. “No it’s okay, he’s here now. But you’ve been a single dad for 3 years Blaze. Time enough to get your act together.”
She hung up and glared at me. “He’s still a spoiled child sometimes.” She shook her head and bit back what she was going to say next. I used every bit of restraint to not hop back in the car and drive home straight away. I think Janie knew because she took away my choice.
“Alright children, let’s help Missus Daisy unpack her car, and show her to the guest bedroom.”
She picked up Manny as she spoke, and the children all screamed and ran for my car, even Blaze’s child.
“I’m sorry, I would have said no if I could,” Janie spoke quietly to me after the kids had settled me in and then ran out to play.
“Who is his mother?” I asked.
“One of the town girls. Ten months after you left, she came knocking on the clubhouse and handed him the birth certificate and the baby. Then she walked into the river and shot herself. Perez forced Blaze to do a DNA test and it came back that Dylan is his.”
I cupped my hands around the glass of ice tea she’d given me.
“Ten months. So he was conceived around the time that BJ died.” I looked up at her. Her face was furious as she nodded and huffed out a frustrated breath.
“He is being raised by just about every ol’lady here, seeing as his father drops him off to whoever will take him if the daycare is closed.
They love him to bits. I just don’t like his father for some fucking solid reason…
and neither does Perez or Midwife.” She looked sad when she admitted the last sentence.
“Everyone else still puts up with his bad behaviour.” I guessed, closing my eyes. “Listen, I’m here to see my dad before it’s too late. Then I’m going back on Monday. So it’s none of my business, really, is it?”
Janie looked at me. “Isn’t it? You’re not an ol’lady anymore? Did you get divorced and I don’t know about it?” she asked.
“No, I’ve been too busy getting a life. Probably time to organize it.” I sighed, raising the truth of it. I’d gotten my qualification and was earning enough to take care of myself. I was ready to cut the ties that were stopping me from moving forward.
“Might be a good time to do it. While everyone’s here.” She winked as she took a sip. I sighed and changed the subject.
“I thought your parents weren’t fans of other races,” I started. Janie raised her eyebrows.
“But Bull’s not white, is he?” I continued.
“Mexican.” She nodded, waiting to see where I took this.
“How did you get them to agree to the wedding?” I asked.
She sighed and put her cup down. “I didn’t.
That was my first rebellion. Bull and I went on a road trip and came back married.
They refused to talk to me for months, and then slowly things got better when they allowed themselves to call him Bill.
” Janie’s lips stretched into a sneer. “They’re out of our lives now.
Eric and Trey were the last rebellion. They refused to have anything to do with us as soon as we took them.
” She shook her head. “But the good side of that is I can do what I want without judgement, and I can call Bull by his real name, Perez.”
I smiled. Backbone looked good on her.