Chapter Thirty-Six
Chloe
More time passes, and I still love my job, but I’m also taking online classes that I really love. I’m working on my bachelor’s degree, and I’m seriously considering continuing my education and earning a master’s degree.
Heck, I might even become a lifelong student like Audrey. Maybe we can move closer to each other or, better yet, share a house. We could be single women and go to college... and then own a couple of dozen cats. Okay, that doesn’t sound so appealing. Maybe just one cat.
I approach the restaurant where I’m meeting her for lunch. I arrive first and see her walking up. I can immediately tell something’s wrong. It’s Saturday, so I don’t have to rush off. We can take our time. I have no other plans for the day and have plenty of time to be with my best friend.
“What’s the matter?” I ask, standing as she approaches.
“Go ahead and sit. I’m sorry I’m late. Let’s order food then we’ll talk.” Her voice sounds a bit too ominous for me. I don’t feel like sitting, but I do as she’s asked.
“Are you seriously going to make me wait?” I ask.
“Yes, because I’m processing things in my mind. Let me finish so I don’t say something foolish.”
She doesn’t need to say anything else. I understand the need to process. The waiter appears, and we order. I’m trying to enjoy the beautiful summer day, though I can’t help but worry. Rain is predominant in Oregon, so when the sun’s out, I need to enjoy it. I’m not normally moody in the summer.
Audrey and I don’t say much as we wait for our food. She’s clearly thinking, and I’m running through every possible scenario I can think of with my vivid imagination. Finally, she sits back, obviously ready to talk.
“I’m your best friend, and I don’t want you to jump to conclusions. I’m just going to tell you what I saw, and we can figure the rest out. Knowledge is power. Remember that,” she begins.
“If you don’t tell me what in the world you’re talking about, I’m likely to go crazy.”
“I was on my way here when I saw Paul. I was about to call out his name when he turned and looked at a door. A woman walked out — a bimbo blonde woman,” she says, instantly being my best friend and putting a label on the girl. My gut clenches.
“What happened?”
“She ran up and wrapped her arms around him. I’m not talking the normal friend hug, or the haven’t seen you in a while hug, or the courtesy hug. She flippin’ threw both arms around his neck and pressed her body against his,” Audrey says. She knows what’s going on between Mason and me, so she’s not angry, just confused. It seems my life is meant to be complicated.
“What did he do?” I ask. For some reason, I’m not upset. I should feel vindicated or relieved that I’m not the only one being unfaithful.
“I will say he didn’t look too comfortable with the hug,” Audrey says. “But the two of them began walking. She tried to put her arm through his, and he made a pretty smooth move and pulled out his phone to show her something. She laughed the most annoying laugh I’ve ever heard. They continued walking. I followed. The streets were crowded, and I stayed a little way back. He didn’t see me.”
“Well, that isn’t so bad.” Audrey is too unsure for this to be the end of the story.
“They went to an exclusive apartment complex downtown. One with a doorman, one of the high-end buildings. They walked inside. I waited... and waited. I finally gave up after a half hour. I didn’t want to keep you any longer, so I came here.”
I should react to this, but I don’t really feel anything. This doesn’t condemn Paul, doesn’t even mean he’s having an affair. It doesn’t look good, but it’s not a sure-thing that he’s carrying on with another woman. Still, I feel... nothing.
“He might be having an affair,” I say and lift a fry and take a bite. Audrey looks at me as if she’s worried I’m losing my mind. Maybe I’ve already lost it.
“We can go there and sit, but they probably came out long ago,” Audrey says.
I think about it. “Or I can call him.” I lift my phone and look up his number. It’s at this moment I realize I don’t have a cute pet name for him. He’s listed in my phone as Paul, not My Sweet Boyfriend , or My Love , or Sweetie . I try to think if I’ve ever called him a pet name. I don’t think I have. How odd.
The phone rings four times then goes to voicemail. I look at Audrey, still feeling numb. She waits for me to say something.
“Well?” she practically yells, making the people at the table next to us turn and give questioning glances.
“He didn’t answer. I can’t tell if he purposely sent me to voicemail. If he did, then he’s not too busy to send me to voicemail. That’s a plus. But if he feels he can’t answer a call from me because of who he’s with, then that’s not good.” I’m still numb.
I pick up my sandwich and take a bite. I taste nothing. Nothing at all. It’s truly odd. I’m not sure what to do next. Should we finally have a talk? Should I confront him or just add this to the list of things we don’t talk about?
Audrey and I finish lunch. I don’t try to call Paul again. An hour passes before my phone rings. It’s him. I look at it sort of confused about what to do.
“Answer the phone,” Audrey says, looking as if she wants to rip the device from my hand and answer it herself. It almost makes me smile. Almost, but not quite. I hit the green button and answer.
“Sorry, Chloe, I was in a meeting,” he says as a greeting. His voice is breathless, and I wondered why. Still, there’s no emotion.
“I called to see if you wanted to join Audrey and me for lunch,” I say, feeling brilliant for thinking this fast on my feet when I can’t seem to think much at all at the moment.
He laughs, and I look at Audrey. “You girls giggle and gossip the entire time. I think I’ll pass,” he says.
“Why are you out of breath?” I ask. “You said you were at a meeting not the gym.” I pick up another fry that’s grown cold. It doesn’t matter. I’m not tasting anything anyway.
“I’m at an apartment building downtown, and I decided to use the stairs instead of the elevator. I’m not getting enough exercise,” he says.
I’m a bit shocked he’s admitting where he is, where he really is. I feel the first hard thump of my heart. Maybe this isn’t an affair. Maybe there really is an explanation... or maybe he’d seen Audrey trailing him and is much faster than I am at coming up with an excuse in the blink of an eye.
“Oh. You had a meeting at an apartment building?” Why would a computer tech have business at a place like that?
“They have a great little community here: restaurants, coffee shops, and meeting spaces.”
“Oh, where is it? Now I’m curious.” I truly am. I want to see if he’s telling me the truth. He tells me, and then says he has to run. We end the call, and I look at Audrey.
“Look this place up.”
She pulls out her iPad and it doesn’t take long for us to figure out Paul’s telling the truth. If you exit out the back of the building there’s a mini town behind the complex.
I feel the smallest stirring of something, but not nearly as much as I should feel at knowing he isn’t cheating on me. I’m more scared about how much I don’t care. I’ve already let him go?
It isn’t until much later when I’m home alone that I realize all of those restaurants and coffee shops and meeting places Paul was telling me he was at are located on the bottom floor. Why had he needed to use the stairs? Maybe I want him to be having an affair so I don’t feel like such a horrible person. And maybe I’ve just wised up.