Chapter 16 Josh
JOSH
The next week goes by in a blur. Melanie and I only manage to spend two days together.
Andrew is on vacation, so Melanie picked up extra shifts.
Every time I see her, she looks exhausted, so I don’t even push her to play with me.
I make us some food each night, and she comes in and eats it on the couch while I play through the song I’m working on for Cara.
Melanie eats and then curls up on the couch, listening and smiling at me before falling asleep.
Eventually, as the hours wear on, I have to wake her up so I can go to sleep.
It would be too weird if I slept in her bed.
Still, these moments with her are precious to me.
I’ve kissed her again, but I haven’t had the courage to take things any further.
If we’re getting a second chance, the last thing I want to do is mess it up.
There are so many things we don’t know about each other anymore.
I worry that when Melanie finds out more about me, she won’t like who I have become.
So, I let myself enjoy these moments with her, but I don’t take things too far.
It’s Saturday afternoon, and I am fumbling with a tricky chord progression when she comes in the front door, surprising me.
She worked the day shift today, but I didn’t realize that the day had passed.
I have been playing guitar for way too long.
She kicks her shoes off by the door and makes her way to me.
“Hey,” she says, plopping down next to me and tucking her legs under her.
I set my guitar down next to me and turn to her. “Hi. How was work?”
Melanie spreads her legs across my lap and lays back. It’s intimate but feels strangely natural. I pick up one of her feet and start rubbing, working the soles of her feet with my own sore fingers from a day of playing guitar.
“Ohhh, that’s amazing.” Melanie moans, closing her eyes.
Something stirs in my chest. “You’re amazing,” I murmur.
Melanie nudges me with her other foot. “Now this one.” She gives me a sleepy smile.
“Okay, okay.” I laugh, going to work on her other foot.
“So, what do you have going on tonight?” Melanie asks, eyes still closed.
“Nothing really,” I admit, cracking her toes.
She peeks an eye open. “Ow,” she says, but she’s smiling.
“Sorry.” I laugh. “I have been inside all day working on Cara’s song. I could use some sunlight, I think. I was waiting to see what you were up to.”
“What did you have in mind?” Melanie asks, sitting up and pulling her feet back. I immediately miss the physical contact.
“You want to go down to our beach?” I tilt my head at her.
“Our beach…” She lets her voice drop.
“You know, by the lighthouse,” I say, scooting closer to her and gripping her ankle so I can start rubbing her foot again.
Melanie’s lips spread into a slow smile. “I know where our beach is,” she says, her voice practically a whisper. “I just never thought of it as our beach.”
I lick my lips. “And I’ve never thought of it as anything but.”
* * *
Fifteen minutes later, we’re trudging up the sandy path, Melanie with a blanket in her arms and a bag with sandwiches, and me with two guitar bags.
We find our spot easily, a quiet nook between the dunes, the red and white lighthouse to our rear.
It’s the same spot we’ve always come to.
It’s the place where I first knew that my heart would always be tethered to Melanie’s.
It's a late June Saturday, so there are still beachgoers parked along the shoreline, kids playing at the water’s edge.
The sun sits lower in the sky, and the air is comfortable.
“Right here?” Melanie turns with a smile.
I wonder if she is remembering prom night—the first night we claimed this place as our own.
“This looks like our spot.” I grin. I wait for her to spread the blanket out before setting our precious instruments toward the back of it.
Then we sit near the front, kicking off our sandals.
The sand is cooler at this time of day. Melanie hands me a sandwich and we sit, eating in comfortable silence.
I’ve never been so comfortable with anyone before.
There is no pressure to fill the silence with Melanie—it’s just us.
She picks up the trash from the sandwich wrapping and shoves it in the bag. Then she passes me a lemonade, and we both take a sip.
“This place has so many memories,” she says quietly. When I look over at her, she isn’t looking at me; she’s watching grains of sand sift through her fingers.
“It does,” I agree.
“Do you remember when we came here with Cara and Liam?” Melanie giggles as she says it, and our eyes meet. I laugh too, knowing exactly what memory she is referring to.
“Yeah, I do. And she all but suggested we move to Nashville together.” I pause. “She really had no idea we already planned to do that.” I huff out a nostalgic laugh.
For a moment, my words hang in the air. We sit still, looking at each other—perhaps both of us reflecting on everything we missed out on together.
I cannot believe I missed out on knowing Melanie all this time.
My chest constricts thinking about it. I’m about to tell her as much when she breaks the silence.
“Plans change, I guess,” Melanie says, offering me a half-hearted smile.
“I didn’t want them to,” I say, my voice gravelly.
Melanie doesn’t reply. She keeps her gaze focused on something down by the water. I get the sense she is holding back.
“I should have come back for you,” I say, angry with myself.
At this, Melanie turns and shakes her head. “Josh, it’s okay. I wouldn’t have had the courage to go anyway.”
“I don’t believe that for a second,” I say, and it comes out harsher than I mean it to. “You wanted it as bad as I did. To go there—to be a star.”
Melanie catches my gaze before quickly averting her glistening eyes. She sniffles. “All that’s in the past,” she mutters. She shifts, turning to face me. “Let’s hear this song.”
It’s clear Melanie doesn’t want to talk about what could have been.
I can understand that to some degree. Being back here has made painful memories resurface for me, too.
But it has also made me realize that I missed out on a whole life with the first girl I ever loved.
Maybe we wouldn’t have ended up together, but maybe we would have.
Now, I am struggling with letting things be or grabbing hold of them before I lose her again.
I pick up my guitar and begin to play. Melanie picks up the chord progression quickly and before long, we’re building on the melody with beautiful harmony. Everything inside me is warm and tingly. This is where I should be.
After an hour of playing together on the beach, my phone interrupts us. It’s a local number so I answer it on speaker.
“Hello?” I say.
“Is this Josh? Jim Jones here from Lite Rock 94.1.” The booming voice comes through the speaker. I glance at Melanie, who gives me an eyebrow raise.
“It is. Great to hear from you, Jim,” I say. Truthfully, I’d forgotten that I’d given Jim my number, but talking to him can’t hurt. “Melanie is here with me.”
“Great! That’s great! Hi, Melanie.” Jim’s enthusiasm carries through the speaker, and this time when I look at Melanie, she’s got her hand over her mouth, muffling a giggle.
“Listen, I’d love to have you two on the morning show next week.
You can talk about your story, how you met, and the concert in September. What do you say?”
I meet Mel’s gaze and she casually lifts a shoulder, which I take as approval.
“Sure, sure, we can do that,” I agree.
“And, do you think you could play an original song? Live? On the show,” Jim asks.
This time Melanie holds up her hands and shakes her head, mouthing the word no at me.
“Oh, well…I’m not sure we’ll have one ready,” I muster.
“Just a small taste of something. What do you say?” Jim Jones is persistent.
I hold a hand up to Melanie and arch my eyebrows. What do you think? I mouth.
“I guess,” she says quietly but out loud. Jim hears.
“Great!” Jim booms. “How is Wednesday?”
“Wednesday is good,” Melanie chimes in for the first time.
“Let’s do eight a.m. at the studio. I’ll send you the address,” Jim says, suddenly speaking quickly. He’s probably afraid we’ll change our minds.
“Sounds great, Jim. Talk to you soon,” I say. We end the call.
“This should be fun, right?” I give Melanie my most optimistic grin.
“Super.”
* * *
By the time we head back to the condo, Melanie and I are both exhausted. We’re trudging up the creaky wooden steps when my phone rings. This time it’s my manager.
“Hey, Gary,” I say, cradling the phone as I unlock the door. “What’s going on?”
“I was just checking in to see how the acoustic album is going,” Gary starts slowly. “Have you written anything yet?”
I glance over my shoulder at Melanie as we walk inside. I can’t help but notice her listening with interest.
“I have actually. Well, revisiting an old song I’ve never produced. And writing a new one for my sister.” I sit down in the armchair.
“Great. That’s good stuff. How long are you staying?” Gary doesn’t pressure me outright, but there’s an underlying urgency to his question.
I huff a laugh. “I don’t know, Gary, I just got here.”
“I’m just asking,” Gary says, and I can imagine the way he’s holding up his hands defensively.
“I know, Gar. I think it’s…good for me to be out of Nashville for a while,” I admit. I look at Melanie who is now sitting across from me on the couch, watching.
“Well, don’t stay away too long. Keep me posted on your progress,” Gary says.
“I will. Promise. We’ll talk soon.” I hang up with a sigh.
“Who was that?” Melanie asks, narrowing her eyes.
I groan. “My manager, Gary. Wants to know when I’m coming back.”
“Weren’t you supposed to be gone until you write this whole album?” Melanie frowns.
I might be imagining it, but there’s a little pink to her cheeks.
“Yes. I am.” I stand up and move to sit by her, tugging her close. “I’m not going anywhere soon, trust me,” I murmur, tugging her closer and planting a soft kiss on her mouth.
Melanie pulls back, running her fingers through my messy hair and gazing at me with a lazy half smile. “Okay. But why did you say you have to stay away from Nashville for a while?” she probes.
I hesitate. I’m not sure I’m ready to talk about what went on down there yet. But the closer Mel and I get, the more it feels like I’m keeping things from her. “I just… There are influences.” I let my words hang in the air. “Just trust me. Here is where I need to be for now.”
“Okay.” Melanie seems satisfied with this when she grabs the collar of my T-shirt and pulls me to her again, kissing me softly. “Can I ask a favor?” she asks without pulling away from our kiss.
I grin into her mouth. “Anything.”
“How do you feel about ditching the couch?” Melanie pulls back, dragging her lower lip between her teeth.
“I’m not sure what you mean?” I furrow my brow. “I don’t mind this couch.”
Melanie giggles. “I meant…would you sleep in my bed with me tonight?”
I fight back the grin threatening to betray my poker face. “Oh,” I say, licking my lips.
“I just…could use a warm body.” A smile tugs at her mouth. “Just to cuddle.”
“Cuddle,” I repeat with a nod. “I think I can handle that.”