Chapter 15 #2
I am momentarily taken aback by this, and Liam rolls his eyes as he starts the car. ‘This is one of the problems with them having a much older sister,’ he says. ‘They sometimes go a little wild with the Netflix account. And you look great, by the way.’
‘Thank you. The Netflix thing could be worse,’ I reply, winking at Alice. ‘And anyway, I think Wednesday’s quite the role model. What else do you like watching, guys?’
The twins quite happily chatter away as we drive to Cara’s, which is a good thing.
It distracts me from noticing exactly how fine their father looks tonight.
He’s wearing a gorgeous black suit and a plain white shirt – no tie, but formal enough to be delicious.
I’ve always had a bit of a thing about a man in a suit.
The right man in a suit, anyway. Like Tyler, I remind myself. He looks absolutely divine in a suit.
Cara lives a short drive along the coast, in what turns out to be a pretty spectacular barn conversion. She greets us at the door, elegant in a green silk gown and matching heels, holding her phone aloft.
‘Photoshoot!’ she demands, taking the cake tin from me and placing it on the doorstep. ‘In the snow, now! It’s Christmas!’
‘No way, I’m freezing my… uh… toes off!’ I bleat, feeling the sudden cold after the luxurious warmth of Liam’s car heating. I’m pleased with the quick save to avoid almost-swearing in front of the kids.
‘Resistance is futile,’ Liam mutters. ‘It’s easier to do as she says.’
Cara directs us, getting us to pose in the middle of her snowy-white garden. Liam stands next to me, and the twins in front. It’s all going well until Cara’s own kids come hurtling out of the house, dressed in Marvel pyjamas and screaming with happiness to see their cousins.
Liam laughs as they all chase each other around with hastily assembled snowballs, Cara yelling at them to get inside before they ‘die of a fecking cold’. So much for avoiding the swearing.
The evening is a pleasant one, although I’m surprised to find it is only the four of us adults there.
I could have sworn Cara had said that Cormac was joining us, but she looks at me blankly when I mention it.
She serves up lasagne and salad, matched with her own soda bread to give it all an Irish twist, and I have provided the pudding.
It’s a tiramisu layer cake, the sponge filled with masses of creamy mascarpone and possibly a little too much coffee liqueur.
The children are all content in the next room, playing games and watching TV, and the atmosphere is so nice.
Laid back in every way apart from the clothes.
‘She insists we dress for these little dinners,’ Liam says, sipping his glass of fizzy water. ‘No idea why.’
‘Because you’re all savages, and someone has to civilise you!’ Cara retorts. ‘Besides, I’ve seen your wardrobe in Dublin, Liam Byrne, and you have many a fine item hanging in it – don’t be playing the eejit and pretending you spend your life in a tracksuit now!’
She sounds so much like Bernadette that we all laugh, and she feigns offence as she disappears into the kitchen for the cheeseboard. I follow after her, carrying some of the plates, and make admiring noises at the sight of the granite work surfaces and walk-in pantry.
‘I’ve always wanted a walk-in pantry,’ I tell her. ‘It’s one of my deepest desires.’
‘Really?’ she says, raising an eyebrow. ‘Well now, that’s just plain sad, Ellie – I’d think a woman in the prime of her life might have a few more interesting desires than that!’
She’s looking at me in a way that invites gossip, but I’m saved by the arrival of Alice, Alex, and Cara and Ben’s three boys, who range in age from three to ten. All of the kids make a beeline for her, all of them speaking at once. The only word I make out is ‘sleepover’.
She hands them a tube of Pringles, and shoos them away, telling them she’ll think about it.
She leans back against the counter, and pours me another glass of wine from the open bottle.
I should be keeping a more careful eye on my consumption, because Liam is driving, and I don’t want to be the drunk girl in the car.
‘I think we need to get Liam a drink,’ she says, as though reading my mind. ‘I’m sure he’d fair kill for a Guinness round about now, and he can leave the car here. I can run you both back.’
‘But haven’t you been on red wine all night?’
‘Sadly no. Ribena. I’m off the sauce at the moment.’
I’m about to ask why when I see her hand go to her still-flat belly, and a small smile play on her lips. I smile back, and say: ‘Really? Congratulations! That’s wonderful news!’
‘I’m sure it is, though I’m also a wee bit terrified.
I don’t know how our mammy did it. Even with three I feel like I’m being attacked by human baseball bats every day.
Still, I don’t suppose one more will make much difference…
don’t mention it to anyone in the village now, will you?
Liam knows, and my mum and dad, but it’s early days. ’
‘Mum’s the word,’ I reply, giving her a quick hug. ‘I’m so happy for you!’
‘What about you?’ she says, tilting her head to one side. ‘Have you never wanted kids? Any plans with Superman?’
It should feel intrusive, the way she so shamelessly delves right into the subject. Maybe I can’t have children, or maybe I don’t want them. There could be all kinds of reasons for my childless state, and questions like hers could easily cause upset without meaning to.
But even though it should feel intrusive, I find that I don’t mind.
It’s just the way she is, and really, there’s nothing to hide here.
I shake my head and say: ‘My husband didn’t want children, and I was too young back then to really be bothered by that.
And Tyler… well, I just don’t know, Cara.
He’s great, he really is. And I always thought I’d have a baby, one day.
But I don’t know if I’m ready to make a commitment like that. I don’t know if I ever will be.’
She turns this over, and I await her words of wisdom.
‘That sounds shite,’ she says simply. ‘But don’t give up.
You’re not that old now, are you? It’s not too late.
You could still meet someone special… maybe you already have.
Besides, if all else fails you can come and borrow my boys whenever you like.
That’d soon put you off. So. Let’s be getting Liam a drink, will we? ’
We do exactly that, and he does not argue.
He is, in fact, as thrilled with a pint of Guinness as he was when we were fourteen and stole them from his dad’s stash in the shed.
The children talk the grown-ups into agreeing to the sleepover, and by the time we leave, Alice and Alex are both wearing superhero pyjamas too – but Batman and Superman rather than Marvel.
All five of them are sprawled out on beanbags in the play room, one of the Despicable Me movies flickering on the big screen, all in various stages of almost-asleep-but-fighting-it.
Alice comes over to give me a hug before we leave, and it is unbearably cute.
She’s so tired she almost falls asleep in my arms.
‘She likes you,’ Liam says, after he has kissed the twins goodnight and we walk out to Cara’s car.
‘Yeah. I’m very likeable. Pretty much on the same mental wavelength as a six-year-old. How’s Bella, talking of people on my mental wavelength?’
‘Good, I think. She’s at home with Mum and Dad, catching up on her coursework. At least I think she is. Let’s face it, she could be anywhere, doing anything, if she’s at all like us.’
‘Aye,’ Cara chips in as we fasten our seatbelts. ‘You two were proper terrors. Where am I dropping you? No reason for your night to end just because mine has. Liam is nowhere near drunk enough for my liking. Fecking embarrassment, he is. A betrayal of the Byrne bloodline.’
‘I’ve been playing catch-up,’ he protests. ‘I’ve done my best! And anyway, it’s… bloody hell, how did that happen? It’s almost one in the morning!’
‘It’s the time flying when you’re having fun thing, isn’t it?’ Cara replies. ‘And I’ll drop you both at the inn, will I? No such thing as closing time when your dad owns the pub.’
I meet Liam’s questioning gaze and raise my eyebrows. I’m already pretty tipsy, but truthfully, I could go for a nightcap. He laughs and says: ‘Some things never change, do they, Ellie? Go on then. One for the road.’