Chapter 19 #2
“You know I don’t do a lot of thinking. It won’t about shit though. I was fucked up because you yelled at me, knowing how sensitive I am. I went in the house, got drunk and high, and Yanna Boo wasn’t answering her phone. Zahra called, and I told her come through. The shit happened so fast.”
“You fucked up.”
“Maybe, maybe not. Yanna’s ass is so fucking aggravating. One minute she act like she want to be my girl, and the next minute she don’t want shit to do with me. Even when I’m trying, when I think I’m being good, she just be super nonchalant about it.”
“Why you think she act like that?”
“It’s yo’ fiancée’s fault.”
“How the hell is it Baby fault?”
“Because her ass ran and told Yanna that I lied to her after Quan’s big ass mouth spilled that I was chilling with a broad. After that, Yanna kept saying I ruined the possibility of us being anything because I started lying to her straight out the gate.”
“I mean, she ain’t wrong. You was lying and didn’t even have to lie. Y’all had just met.”
“Oh, so you not telling Troi about Brea won’t the same thing?”
“We ain’t talking about me. And Baby is more forgiving than Yanna is.”
“Clearly.”
“You in love and shit?”
“You in love and shit?” Kas mocked. “You gone have to get better at this before my nephew gets older. But… hell yea, I’m in love.
When she’s not around me, all I do is miss her.
When she’s with me, I get anxiety thinking about the moment she won’t be.
The way I feel about Yanna, I ain’t never feel for nobody before.
She got this vibe about her. Like, we can smoke and vibe together like she one of my homeboys, but she got this softness to her at the same time.
Everybody be saying me and her are the same person, and I kind of feel that.
The only other person I’ve ever been so comfortable with is you. Plus, she a big ole’ freak.”
“I didn’t need to know all that. You need to fix this shit though because while you trying to get yo self together, she’d have already moved on.”
“She ain’t going no fucking where. Anyway, you still not talking to mumma.”
“Who?”
“Nigga don’t do that shit to my mumma, I might lose, but I swear I’d fight you.”
“You damn sure gone lose, but nah, I ain’t fucking with Layla right now. The fuck was she doing with that nigga Nouri? Prancing around with that nigga like shit is all good.”
“You think she fucking with him?”
“I don’t think she’s that damn dumb to deal with the nigga that left her to raise two sons by herself. Then again, I wouldn’t think she’d be foolish enough to bring him around us. We’ve gone all these years without knowing the nigga, and we don’t need to know him now.”
“Right,” Kas replied, but didn’t feel the same way. He wanted to express that to his brother, but it was too soon. “Where my sister and nephew at though? I’m used to that nigga running through here bouncing off the walls.”
“He up there with them watching Into the Spider-Verse for the 900th time.”
“Them?” Kas questioned. Before Onyx had a chance to respond, he got his answer when Yanna came prancing down the stairs in front of Troi.
“Where my Jr?”
“After watching that damn movie almost twice, he finally conked out. He’s in the middle of our bed knocked out,” Troi replied to Onyx.
“Yanna Boo, can I talk to you for a minute?” Kas questioned, hopeful she’d bestow him a chance to explain himself.
Her reaction was to give him the middle finger before grabbing onto Troi’s hand. “Come on, let’s go onto the terrace.”
“Did you really have to flip him off and just walk right past him?” Troi questioned Yanna once the home’s sliding doors were secured.
“I didn’t have to, but I wanted to. I’m really not trying to be a bitch to him right now, but more so just trying to avoid him at all costs.”
“I get that, but you don’t think the two of you should at least have a conversation? I know what he did was fucked up, and I still plan to tell him about himself, but---”
“It’s not that. I---” Yanna really wanted to bury her wrongdoings in the deepest recesses of her memory, but it was proving to be a hard task. If no one else, Yanna knew her cousin was the one person she could tell.
“You what?”
“I fucked up.”
“Oh God,” Troi sighed exaggeratedly. “Jaiyanna, what in the hell did you do?”
“Something bad… something really bad, Troi. Like, I don’t think I’ve ever done anything this fucked up before.”
“What.the.fuck.did.you.do?”
Standing from the patio chair she’d just occupied, Yanna stood and walked to the other side of the table. Her secret was far too horrid to speak aloud, so she leaned in and whispered it into her cousin’s ear. Troi’s gasp was audible, and her eyes grew wide as she bolted from her chair.
“Jaiyanna Latrice Munroe! Are you fucking kidding me?! Kalil?!”
“No, bitch, if you would let me finish my sentence…” Yanna leaned back in to finish whispering her statement. When she was done, Troi sat in the chair, glaring at her with a look of disappointment. “Oh, Troi, don’t look at me like that.”
“Yanna, that shit would fucking crush Kas.”
“I know I’m a terrible person and this was the worst form of getting my lick back, but… my feelings were hurt, I was drunk… like I was drinking A LOT. I was mixing brown with tequila, I even think I popped a pill, and I honestly don’t even remember the shit happening.”
“No ma’am. You not gone stand your ass right here at your big age and blame your poor decisions on liquor and hurt feelings. You should know your fucking limits.”
“Don’t you think I know all that? I already said I fucked up, so trust me, I know full well that what I did was trifling and childish.”
Troi released a deep sigh, stress from Yanna’s revelation consuming her. She reclaimed her seat as her head spun. “Do you want to be with Kas?”
“No.”
“You a damn lie, because if you didn’t, his actions wouldn’t have caused you to get fucked up and do something so unmentionable.”
“Well, it doesn’t matter now anyway.”
“That’s not necessarily true. Just keep your knees together and stay the hell away from that Des boy. Kalil, too for that matter.”
“I don’t know how I’ll do that when his ass is always around.”
“Easy, when you see him, you go the other way. I’mma need you to get it together though, cousin. Figure out if you really want to be with Kas or not, and act like you got some sense. If not, you’re both going to lose each other.”
Yanna heard her cousin and knew what she was saying was true. However, she feared that for her and Kas, it was already too late.