Chapter 30 Sybil
Sybil
Sitting on the bed, I impatiently waited for Samian to finish washing up after our training.
I stared mindlessly into the bathroom, at the clawed porcelain tub that sat in the middle of the room.
Forcing Samian to clean up in his own chambers, I washed my hair at the sink and used a rag to clean myself as best I could.
I felt like a coward for not using the tub, for letting my time with Ambrose and Arianna affect me to the point where I avoided submerging myself into the watery depths.
But no matter how much I tried, my breath would seize up in my throat, and my heart would hammer away painfully behind my chest until I gave up.
Flashes of the frigid water and the feeling of not being able to breathe would take over my mind, panic stealing my breath, even if the water was hot enough to scald.
Salem lay beside me, sleeping away after randomly popping up when he felt the trickle of anxiety sparking in my chest. Exhaustion weighed heavily on me, and all I wanted was to curl up against him and sleep through the rest of the night.
But before Samian and I separated, he asked if I wanted to go with him to visit Aster to discuss how we could get me out of the palace long enough to go to the Seelie Court.
My heart leapt at his invitation. Guilt had been weighing on me for not visiting Aster sooner—especially since I’d essentially fled her office after my first conversation with Queen Cassia.
Though I tried to hide it, she noticed my blanched face and stunned expression as I left; her inquisitive eyes missed nothing.
So now I waited on my bed, my knee bouncing restlessly as I played with the hem of my shirt, trying hard not to think about Kieran and his frustrating need to protect me. He promised he would keep me involved, and while I am, it wasn’t how I thought it would be.
I understood Kieran’s point about Ambrose and what would happen if he found out about my being involved in any plan against him, whether it was with the rebellion or otherwise.
But I broke his command twice. Samian only knew about the second time.
The first time, I kept to myself because I wasn’t sure if it really happened.
I had heard Ambrose’s command to stay in my room, felt that invisible chain tighten while I gazed at my door, unseeing and sick with what I had just done.
I felt the command urging me to open the door to my room and wait until Ambrose came for me again.
However, it broke when Arbus’s necklace pinched my skin and snapped me out of my stupor.
I knew I could do it again, if given the chance, though I still wasn’t sure how I broke his command—whether it was the pain or if it was something else entirely. Groaning, I fell back onto the bed. I could do more; I knew I could. I just needed the opportunity to show them.
I would do more, whether Kieran liked it or not. I refused to sit back, safe and sound, letting all of this happen while others put themselves in harm’s way.
The door to the hidden room opened, and I sat up, watching the doorway for Samian to appear. My lips rose with a slight grin when he sauntered in, not stopping until he stood in front of me, and I had to tip my head back to see his face.
“You ready?” Samian asked, offering me his hand. Nodding, I slipped mine in his, relishing the way his soft fingers curled around me. “Daelan is already waiting for us in Aster’s office. With Ambrose becoming more unbalanced, we will take the passageway not to stir up any suspicion.”
Samian lifted me from the bed, his hand raising to tuck a lock of dampened hair behind my ear, but lingered when his thumb brushed against the tip.
“They’re becoming more arched,” he whispered, his thumb rubbing against the shell of my ear.
“My eyes are greener too,” I said, nodding.
I still couldn’t decide how I felt about the physical changes.
I didn’t care that I was stronger or that my vision had sharpened; I welcomed those changes.
What unsettled me were the ones I could see—the proof of how much less human I was becoming.
It was hard to wrap my mind around it, though I couldn’t confidently say that I hated it.
Not when I’d found a family that accepted me—all of me—into their lives without a thought or care in the world.
Yet, there was a lingering sadness welling at the loss of my old family, the friends that I left behind without a word.
As if sensing what I felt, Samian pressed his lips against my forehead. “Let’s get going then. We are already late, and I know Aster will probably kill us if we take too much longer.”
Snorting, I shook my head. “Well, hopefully she starts with you. I was ready a while ago and have been patiently sitting here waiting for you.”
Samian clucked his tongue, pushing me out of the room. “You’ll pay for that later.” His voice turned deep and rough, causing a shiver to dance down my spine.
The memory of earlier tonight, of me straddling him, came through the soul-bond along with the burning desire he felt.
I stopped, my head whipping toward him. My eyes darkened, my blood heated, but Samian shoved his hands into his pockets, flashing me a quick smirk as he walked by me and into the obscured hallway.
I could feel a blush climbing up my neck and face, but I cleared my throat, forcing myself not to think of what he would do to me when we were alone again.
Salem brushed against my legs, pulling me out of my heated thoughts to follow Samian. Rushing up to them, I closed the door to the hidden room, trailing silently behind them. Once we got further into the passage, Salem ran ahead of us, his ears twitching before disappearing within the shadows.
“I’m not sure if I’ll ever get used to that,” Samian sighed, staring at the now-empty hall.
“I kind of like his presence,” I shrugged.
“I like him much better like this than how he looked before.” A shiver crawled down my spine as I thought of the empty black face that watched me from afar.
His cat-like shape was much easier to accept than his original form, though I could still do without the dreams of him maiming and killing.
The door to Aster’s office came into view, and I reached out for the handle to open it when Samian’s hand wrapped around my arm, wrenching me back and pushing me into a wall.
I gasped as magic tingled down my arms, ready to strike—then Samian’s lips crashed into mine, his hands hot as they slid to my waist and down my hips.
He pulled me into him, his body becoming flushed with mine.
His tongue swiped across my lips, and I opened for him.
Our kiss became wild, a clash of teeth and tongue as he swallowed my moan, his fingers digging into my hips as he ground against me.
Samian jerked away then, his hands threading through his silver hair. I leaned back against the icy wall, breathless, letting the chill seep into my skin to help me calm down.
“Fuck, I’ve been wanting to do that since the forest.” Coming back to me, he ran his thumb over my bottom lip. “We really need to talk with Aster. Open the door before I change my mind and carry you back to your room.”
I stayed frozen to that spot, my breath feeling shallow, staring into Samian’s heated gaze.
I ran my tongue over my swollen lips, almost ready to let him do just that.
But I knew we needed to work out a plan that would allow me to leave the palace long enough to talk to Solaris about my bargain without having Ambrose question my whereabouts.
Taking a breath, I rose on my toes, my cheek brushing against Samian’s as my teeth latched around the shell of his ear, pulling a groan deep from Samian’s throat.
“Stop teasing me,” I whispered before sliding away from his touch.
Samian chuckled and closed the distance, his body warm and flush against my back. “Then stop tempting me, my light,” Samian murmured back. His hand curled around the handle, pulling the door open before I could say anything else.
Daelan and Aster’s heads whipped toward us, the latter looking very unpleasant to be in Daelan’s proximity. Her lips pressed into a hard, thin line, her nose wrinkling in distaste while Daelan grinned, his brows waggling in our direction.
“Get this mutt away from me,” Aster seethed to Samian. “I told you before that this heathen isn’t allowed in my office.”
“Remember your manners, Aster,” Samian laughed. “He is one of the few who are on our side in the palace, and he didn’t cause that much damage last time. We were able to fix everything—almost everything.”
“He talks too much,” Aster sneered, throwing a glare in Daelan’s direction.
I laughed, giving Aster a small wave as I climbed out of the passage.
“Why are you all trespassing in my office?” Aster’s steely eyes burned, taking us in one by one. Her fierce attitude made me smile, and I quickly moved toward her, wrapping my arms around her.
“I missed you, too, Aster,” I beamed.
Aster straightened under my touch, but after a moment, she relaxed into my hold, timidly patting my back. When I pulled away from our hug, she clucked her tongue, taking a step back.
“I’m glad to see you looking better,” she mumbled awkwardly. “And that you’re not injured this time. But again, why are you all here?”
“We need an excuse to get Sybil out of the palace for a while,” Samian answered from behind me. “We thought you would be the best person for the job.”
“You mean I’m the only one for the job?” Aster exhaled.