Lilah
“ T hese are amazing seats!” squeals Sadie, bouncing up and down beside me and almost spilling her popcorn. Lights are flashing around us, and the black and gold storm cloud logo of the Toronto Thunder is prominently displayed everywhere I look. The crowd is loud and excited, all clapping hands and shouted cheers. Rock music blares from the arena’s speaker system and a part of me wishes I hadn’t come. It’s so loud and crowded and overwhelming.
But the other part of me wants to see Kincaid, so here I am, gritting my teeth against the onslaught of stimuli so that I can see my crush on the ice.
The lights dim even further and a rush of excitement fills me as the music swells and spotlights start swirling on the ice. Because it’s the team’s first game of the season, there are more theatrics than usual.
The announcer’s voice booms through the speakers as he announces the coaching staff, finishing with my dad, who steps onto the bench looking handsome in the dark blue suit I helped him pick out earlier at home. He looks relaxed, but I know he’s nervous. Pride swells in me as the crowd erupts in a thunderous cheer for him and he waves. Sadie screams beside me, popcorn spilling out of her bag and onto the ground.
“You got this Shane!” she yells, and when he turns back to look at us—we’re only a few rows above the Thunder’s bench—her face goes red. He gives us a little nod, and I smile and shoot him a thumbs up. I know he’s happy that I’m here. He thinks that I’m pushing myself out of my shell for him, which makes me feel a little guilty, because while I do want to support my dad, I’m here because Kincaid asked me to come.
God, just thinking the words Kincaid and come in the same sentence has me clenching my thighs together. Because the truth is, my crush on him has only grown since I met him at the party almost a week ago. I wake up thinking about him. I fall asleep thinking about him. I picture his gorgeous face, with those intense blue eyes, full lips, and square jaw. I imagine running my hands through his thick blond hair. I replay the sound of his voice, deep and masculine. I conjure up the scent of his cologne.
I touch myself and imagine it’s his huge hand moving between my legs, stroking my clit until I burst. Telling me I’m his good girl.
Gah. I’m a mess.
All I think about is Kincaid. I’m a little puppy with a massive crush, making heart eyes at a man who doesn’t feel anything like that for me.
Except…when I think about Kincaid, I also think about the way he looks at me. It’s hungry and tender at the same time. Sweet and ravenous. I think about how kind he is to me. I think about some of the comments he made that I think, maybe, were flirting.
Or, I could just be seeing what I wish was there. I don’t know. It’s not like I have any experience with this sort of thing.
Once the coaching staff is introduced, the song changes and the spotlight moves to the open gate in the boards where the players will emerge. One by one, they’re introduced in numerical order. Toronto Thunder logos made of light swirl on the ice, and the crowd cheers loudly for every single player.
“From Toronto, Ontario, your assistant captain, number forty-four, Kincaid Campbell!” The crowd explodes around me as Kincaid steps onto the ice in a Toronto uniform for the first time, and he raises his stick to the crowd in greeting. My heart gallops in my chest at the sight of Kincaid all decked out in his hockey gear. His shoulders look even broader, his thighs even thicker, and I’m a little obsessed with the way his blond hair peeks out from under his helmet. The cheering doesn’t subside and Kincaid raises his stick again in acknowledgment, his eyes bright with emotion.
The rest of the team is introduced and the national anthems are sung, and the entire time, I don’t take my eyes off of Kincaid. I can’t.
“I can see why you have a massive crush on him,” Sadie says, elbowing me once the anthems are done and we sit back down. Heat rushes to my cheeks and I duck my head slightly. “That man is gorgeous.”
“I know. And he’s not just handsome as hell, Sadie. He’s so nice. And I know nice sounds boring, but to me, it’s not. He’s got this warmth, this kindness that I…” I trail off, my face heating even more. “Anyway. Yeah. I like him. A lot. Which is stupid, because it’s not like it’s going to go anywhere. I need to content myself with enjoying from afar.”
Sadie pats my arm reassuringly. “I don’t know. He keeps looking over here.”
“He does?” My heart bounces up into my throat, making it hard to breathe as I look down at the bench and see that Kincaid is, in fact, looking up at me, a half-smile on his gorgeous lips. He tips his chin in my direction, and I lift my hand in a nervous wave. He winks at me before turning to say something to his teammate, and heat blossoms right in the middle of my chest, making me feel all soft and melty.
“I’m telling you, I don’t think this crush of yours is one-sided,” says Sadie. She sighs. “Believe me, I know all about one sided crushes and unrequited love, and this isn’t that.”
“You do?” I ask, turning to look at her. She’s staring out at the ice as play resumes, her gaze unfocused. She shakes her head.
“It doesn’t matter. Either it’ll work out, or it won’t, but either way, I’ll be okay.”
I can’t tell if she’s trying to convince me or herself, but I get the overwhelming sense that she doesn’t want to talk about it.
“You really think Kincaid might…” I can’t even bring myself to say the words out loud. It’s too much. Too exciting, too unbelievable.
“I really do, Li.” She bumps her shoulder against mine. “Look at you, lusting after an older man, and a hockey player to boot.” We both laugh because my dad has always made such a big deal about me not being allowed to date hockey players. He knows the kind of talk that happens in locker rooms, how much some of these guys get around, and he wants me far away from all of that. Objectively, I get it. And before meeting Kincaid, I never really cared about Dad’s rule because I wasn’t dating anyone at all, ever.
But now…
Just then, Kincaid steals the puck and bursts up the ice on a breakaway, skates flashing and arms pumping as he puts on a show of speed and power. The goalie comes out to challenge him, but Kincaid flips the puck from one side of his body to the other, his stick gliding smoothly over the ice as he moves with an athletic grace that has me squirming in my seat. He fakes once, twice, and then flips the puck over the goalie’s shoulder as if it’s the easiest thing in the world. The goal light goes off, the horn blares, and the crowd around me roars.
I surge to my feet, arms in the air. “Yes! Woohoo!” I scream. “Go Kincaid!” I cheer and clap and scream along with the rest of the crowd, caught up in the surge of excitement that he’s scored his first goal for the team so early in his first game. He celebrates with his new teammates, then skates back to the bench for more fist bumps and shoulder slaps.
Then he turns, looking up over his shoulder at me, and he smiles. It’s wide and bright, and I know it’s just for me. I smile back, feeling light as air.
And I can’t help but wonder if maybe Sadie’s right.