21. Piper
CHAPTER 21
Piper
O utside, the air is hot. It’s July, which means that even in Montana, things can get summery and muggy sometimes.
I need more. I need to breathe.
There’s a park across the street. I stumble over there, my mind whirling. Is this what it’s going to be like? They’re constantly going to be looking at me, watching me, seeing if I’m going to do something that they’re trying to predict?
I make it to the park and settle onto a bench. The bench faces a playground. It’s dark outside, so there aren’t any kids on it, but I can still envision them there. I’ve driven past this playground plenty, and it’s usually filled with children.
I shut my eyes and take a deep, deep breath. The test in my purse feels like it’s a guillotine blade, waiting to drop.
“Piper,” I hear Brent’s voice. I stiffen.
“Look, whatever we did, we’re sorry,” Tate says. “Shit, I’ll literally take a verbal lashing if it helps you feel better.”
I sigh. Turning to the guys, I stand up.
You have to tell them. Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good.
“Nothing you say right now is going to help me feel better,” I say.
The churning in my stomach definitely isn’t going to be helped by words. And I definitely am missing that ginger ale from the restaurant.
Brent’s face falls, and Dalton looks downright glum. Tate, however, is edging closer. “Piper…”
“Honestly. Did you really think that I would just leave? Just like that? No warning? No nothing?” I fume.
They’re all silent.
I huff. “I’m mad because it seems like you have no faith in me. Like you think I’m just going to walk out of your lives, willy-nilly. I’ve been your best friend since what, thirteen years ago? Why the heck would I just walk out and not tell all of you why?”
The guys exchange a glance. Brent, finally, turns. “I don’t think it was that.”
“Okay, what was it then?” I demand.
“Piper. You’ve been something that we all love. Someone we all love,” Tate says, looking at the other guys. They nod.
I, however, am stuck on one word.
Love.
“I know I’ve loved you since I was a kid. And no, I’m not talking about being a friend. I’ve been your friend, too,” he says quickly. “But it was always clear to me that you didn’t want to be more than a friend. That you wanted that friendship. And I was fine with that, because I wasn’t going to push your feelings any type of way. If you wanted to be friends, we knew we would be fine with it.”
“But then, with this…” Brent adds.
“We got the chance to show you that we could be so much more than friends,” Tate finishes.
Dalton grunts. “And that shit’s scary.”
I look between the three of them.
Brent sits on the bench, looking up at me. He’s so tall that even on the bench, our height difference is almost negligible. His eyes look a dark forest green in the night.
“I am worried we’re screwing this up, Piper. I’m worried that you’re going to realize you just want to be friends. That you don’t feel the same way about me, about us, as we do about you.”
“I don’t want to just be friends,” Dalton growls.
Tate gently takes one of my hands. “We love you. I love you. I love you so fucking much, Piper. Part of it is friendship. But I can’t tell you that I love you as a friend when I literally dream about fucking you every night, and during most of the day, too.”
I look at where his hand is in mine. I look at the three guys. And I burst into tears.
“Shit,” I hear Tate whisper. A second later, he’s tugging me into his arms, patting my back. “Shit, Piper. I’m sorry. We can go back to being friends. That’s totally fine. I’m not worried about being friends?—”
“I’m pregnant,” I sob.
All three of them go very, very still.
“Piper. You gotta help us out a little,” Brent says. “I thought you wanted to be pregnant?”
“I do,” I say.
“Okay. Okay. So. Why are you crying?” Tate asks.
I cry even harder. All three of them move to surround me. It’s like a wall of muscle and warmth and good smells, and I take some comfort in the fact that they’re there. And they aren’t going anywhere.
Eventually, the crying stops. I pat my eyes dry and look at them. I take a deep breath.
“I’m a week late for my period. I told you that I was going to meet you here because I needed to go into town and grab a test. And then I didn’t want to take it at the grocery store because how weird would that be? So I drove all the way back to my house. I fed the chickens. I peed on the stick. I showered. And then when I got out of the shower, I saw this.” I rummage in my purse, pulling out the pregnancy test.
All three guys lean in. It very, very clearly says pregnant.
I still can’t believe it, if I’m being honest. So I take another look as well.
“So you saw the pregnancy test,” Tate prompts. “And then?”
“Then, I cried a lot. So, I had to redo my makeup. And then I came here,” I gulp. “And yes, I took a bunch of my clothes home because I was going to swap them out.”
“Not to leave?” Dalton asks.
I shake my head, putting my hand against his jaw. “Not to leave.”
“Oh,” he says softly.
I snort. Oh. “I want to tell you all something. I love you. And I’m so scared that I’m going to lose you.”
Tate leans forward, but I hold up a hand. “It’s more than just being afraid of losing you, Tate. I’ve learned that good things are hard. Good things don’t come to just anyone. You have to work really hard to make the things around you good. I spend so much time making sure that everything around me is perfect. I like it that way. I’m good at it. But being with you three, it isn’t perfect. It’s good . I want it to be good. I want it to be the four of us, together, but it’s never going to be perfect, and it’s never going to be set in stone.”
Dalton tilts his head, and I wave my hand.
“Everything in life changes. This baby—” I cradle my hand over my stomach. “—is going to change. Constantly. And that is really, really scary for me. So I did need some time alone to think today. But I was always coming back. And I was always going to tell you that I love you. More than just friends. I’ve loved you for a long time. I dated a whole bunch of losers, but I don’t know that I was really trying that hard because…” I breathe in, looking at them. “Because I knew they weren’t you.”
Dalton looks down at me, and Brent squeezes my shoulder. I lean back into Tate’s arms, and I sigh. “I was looking for you. All of you. I never could choose, and I never wanted just one. I wanted all three of you. Always. It never would work with anyone else, because I wanted it… with you.”
There’s a minute where we can hear the crickets loudly chirping. The wind ruffles my hair, and I shiver slightly.
“Piper. All you had to say was that you weren’t leaving and that you were pregnant. We kind of got the rest figured out,” Tate says.
He yelps as Brent smacks him on the shoulder.
I smile. “Do you ever take anything seriously, Tate?”
He steps forward and kisses my forehead. “Yes. You. You’re the center of my world, Piper Cassidy. The center of all of our worlds. You have been since the minute we met you. This baby is going to be one hell of an adventure, and I know for a fact that I can’t wait to go on it with you.”
Brent nods, and Dalton presses a kiss to my cheek.
I look around at them. My men. My guys.
“I think that we have some celebrating to get back to.”