Chapter 7
Seven
Iain Scotswolf, my boss, was standing in the doorway between our two offices. His gray eyes wide with shock, and his sensitive nose flared so wide that I knew he could smell the strange scent I was emitting.
My heart froze at the sight of my boss watching me desperately try to get myself off.
But my hand refused to cease working my own sex. Not even for a second. In fact, it moved faster under Iain’s shocked gaze. I couldn’t … I couldn’t stop myself.
“I’m sorry,” I all but sobbed, trying my best to choke out some kind of explanation. “Taking new meds … side effects … can’t stop—oh!”
I broke off with a cry when another wave of that strange smell suddenly filled up the room, overtaking my words. Overtaking my mind.
Him! Him! It’s him! Need him! a feral voice said inside my … was it inside my head? No, it seemed to come from someplace deeper. Like a base part of my spirit—almost like a soul …
Wherever it came from, the new voice inside of me was keening, Iain! Iain! Iain! He is the one to stop this!
Oh my dear God.
The wild thing inside of me didn’t just want me to get myself off. It wanted someone else to get me off. And that someone was my boss. The guy currently white-knuckling the doorknob as if the sight of his assistant engaged in such inappropriate behavior had him struggling to stay on his feet.
But then something worse than him finding me like this happened.
He started to back away …
No! No! Don’t let him go! the feral voice inside me screamed.
But it was too late. SLAM! Iain disappeared into his office. As if he was running away from the wild woman in his outer office.
Oh crap, oh crap! My mind shorted out for a second, not knowing what to do.
But apparently, the wild thing knew exactly what it wanted.
I’d been unable to stand a few moments ago, but suddenly my body no longer felt weak. Just determined.
On strong legs, I propelled myself across the room and came to stand outside his door as I had nearly every weekday morning since I’d been hired three years ago.
Except this time, I was naked. And intent on one thing.
My boss.
“Iain,” I moaned, my body releasing yet another wave of the extremely strong but not at all foul odor.
At least to my nose. Iain, however, sounded like he was choking on the other side of the door when he answered, “Don’t, Millicent. Don’t come in here. I can’t be responsible for what I do if you come in here.”
“Iain, please …” I begged without an ounce of shame. It felt like my entire body was on fire, every nerve intent on one goal. One person. “Iain, I … I need you …”
“You must find a way to call your flatmate, Millicent. Tell her you don’t feel well and ask her to bring something to sedate you with.”
“What?” My voice cracked with incredulity. Being sedated by my female roommate was the exact opposite of what I wanted right now. The opposite of what I needed. “No, I don’t want to be sedated … I want you. Please, I hurt so bad Iain … I need you.”
He must have been standing right on the other side of the door. I heard his sharp inhale as if my plea had stabbed through him, causing him physical pain.
And it sounded like he was talking through gritted teeth when he replied, “Millicent, please tell your flatmate to come here and sedate you. You’re not … you’re not in control of yourself.”
No, I wasn’t.
My body had been taken over by this all-consuming desire.
Sensible little Milly Odom was no longer in control.
Somebody else—somebody desperate and craven answered his command, “No, I won’t do it.
I’ll sit right here outside this door until you fuck me, Iain.
I’m not calling Tara or leaving—not until you give me what I want.
Can you please just have sex with me? Please? ”
Another sharp inhale, then several short exhales, as if he was working hard to stay in control on the other side of the door. Then he bit out the words: “Call. Your. Flatmate.”
Oh God, oh God, the heated desire continued to roll over me in waves, wracking my body. I knew I should be taking his advice instead of lurking outside his door. Begging him to take me, his mousy secretary.
Yet, I couldn’t stop myself from trying again. “Please, Iain, I know I’m, like, this awkward virgin. And nowhere near as pretty as the girls you like to date.”
Tears slid down my cheeks, as I rested my hot forehead against the cool door’s wood. “But I feel like I’m going to die if you don’t have sex with me. I’m aware of how crazy and bad that sounds, but it’s true. I’m begging you, Iain, I’m beg—”
I broke off. Not because of how bad I was embarrassing myself with my desperate pleas, but because the door suddenly flung open. And there stood Iain, on the other side of it. Breathing hard.
“Is that what you think?” he bit out. “That I’m saying no because I dinnae fancy you? You’re honestly thinking I put you on the other side of that door because you’re not pretty enough … sexy enough for me?”
He sounded gravely insulted, like my plea for him to lower his standards had somehow impugned his core character.
“I … I don’t know,” I started to say—
The next thing I knew, Iain was on my side of the door. Sweeping my naked body up in his arms and carrying me across the room.
What felt like less than a second later, I was deposited on the couch meant for clients.
“Knees. Now,” he bit out.
His hands were on me before I could even process the command.
He flipped me onto my stomach, then pulled my hips up hard. I felt but could not see Iain settle in behind me. His kilt brushed the back of my naked thighs as he said, “I will show you just how much I don’t fancy you, chridhe.”
His kilt lifted, covering my backside, and the next thing I felt was the tip of him at my entrance.
As hot as I’d been for him just a few moments ago, my back stiffened, my heart seizing up with fear. Because this was happening. Finally. Exactly what I’d asked him for.
The new, feral voice inside of me was ecstatic. But the scared mouse I’d always been seized up with the recollection that I’d never actually done this before.
“Relax, chridhe …” One of Iain’s hands found the back of my neck, massaging it with his thumb. “I’m half out of my mind for you, but I’ve no plans to hurt you. Trust me.”
His words and the thumb at the back of my neck soothed me somehow. Loosened my muscles, until I became pliant again.
As soon as I did, Iain’s hand at my neck went hard, his arm locking in place. And that was all the warning I got before Iain pushed his full length into me. He was so … so …
Thick … oh, my God, long, too. And he throbbed so hard inside of me. All doubts about whether he’d be able to bear having sex with me were immediately pushed from my head.
I screamed. But not in pain. The wild thing now controlling my actions was just insanely relieved to finally be joined with Iain like this. The loss of my hymen felt like nothing more than a small bandage being pulled off my skin.
But then he stopped, going completely still, even though he was embedded inside of me.
“Iain …” I whimpered, wondering why he wasn’t moving.
“I need a moment, chridhe. Giving you first claim …” He trailed off as if he didn’t have the words to finish that statement. But then he said, “It’s beyond anything I ever could have imagined for us.”
I felt the exact same way. In all the ways I’d imagined losing my virginity, I never would have guessed it would be to my boss on top of the couch I sat across from every day.
It felt like a fever dream. Maybe it was. Maybe none of this was happening, and I’d wake up in my apartment any moment now to find myself in the throes of the many sicknesses my diagnosis would inflict on me before killing me all together.
And if that was the case …
With wanton abandon, I began rolling my hips into him, not caring how it looked or if I was coming off as some kind of desperate sex junkie.
“Millicent …” My name was both a curse and a warning on his lips.
Then the hand on the back of my neck went hard again, his forearm locking so I couldn’t move anything but my hips as he began to take me slowly from behind. Building a fire inside of me unlike anything I’d ever felt before, even when I was lonely, bored, and horny.
Whatever I’d been expecting from my first time. Whatever I’d dreamed of … this was better. Oh God, was it better ...
A mere minute or two later, I cried out. Voice-breaking, mind-shattering.
My body torqued so wildly beneath Iain’s anchoring hand, it began to feel like he was holding me down for my own good. That if he wasn’t there, the waves of pleasure would carry me away, and I’d be lost forever.
But Iain was there, and he did hold me in place, keeping his arm locked until I was through. Only then did he release the back of my neck.
But instead of continuing on to get his release, he said, “There are some things I must share with you now, chridhe. I know you desire for me to take you. But that is not how this works. You must accept my claim if you wish for us to go on.”
“Accept your claim,” I repeated. I remained breathless from the intense orgasm I just experienced. But somehow I still ached for more. “What happens if I don’t?”
“Then I must pull out. Let you be,” he answered, his voice becoming cold and flat, even as he told me.
“It would be the hardest thing I’ve ever done, and we still might have to sedate you.
But I could do it. I would do anything you asked of me.
It is your choice, chridhe. But I can only hold my beast for so long. Say aye now before I lose control.”
Say aye …
His words made no sense to me. But I knew one thing loud and clear. I did not want him to pull out—not even to put on a condom. For some reason, the wild voice inside of me wouldn’t even consider asking him to put one on.
“Aye,” Someone who couldn’t be meek little Milly Odom panted in response to his ultimatum. “Aye, I want this. I want you to come inside me. So bad. Please …”