Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
HUDSON
As soon as we’re downstairs, Cole spins around and looks at me and Gage. “Are we really doing this?”
Gage runs a hand through his hair, shooting him a look before glancing at me in question.
“Do you not want to?” I ask though I already know the answer. Those two like Lily as much as I do.
“I’m not having second thoughts.” Cole leans against the kitchen counter, that signature smirk nowhere to be found. “I only need to know we’re all on the same page here.”
I grab three beers from the fridge, popping the caps and sliding them across the granite. “We’re all in this together or we’re not in it at all.” That’s the only way it’ll work.
“Agreed.” Gage takes a drink. “But we need to be smart about it. She’s vulnerable right now.”
Cole nods. “The last thing any of us wants is to take advantage of that or for us to hurt her.”
“We won’t.” The words come fierce and certain. We’ve never talked about it openly before. Our attraction to her has been hanging between us like a live wire every time she came around with Matt. Every time she smiled at one of us, laughed at our jokes, looked at us like we were worth something.
Gage sighs, leaning his hip against the island. “Fuck, I hope we know what we’re doing.”
Cole grins. “When have we ever known what we’re doing?”
Gage laughs. “Fair point.”
My mind drifts as I grab the stuff for burgers from the fridge.
Lily might’ve moved in, but I’ve been thinking about her since I was eight years old, standing on the playground during recess, watching the new girl with red hair and freckles sit by herself on the swings.
She’d started at our school that Monday, and I’d been working up the courage to talk to her all week.
She looked so small sitting there, her feet barely touching the ground as she pushed herself gently back and forth.
She looked so sad and alone. I’d wanted to walk over, introduce myself, maybe ask if she wanted to play kickball with me, Matt, and the guys.
But every time I took a step in her direction, my stomach tied itself in knots and my palms got sweaty.
So I simply watched her, memorizing the way the sun caught the copper highlights in her hair, the way she hummed softly to herself while she swung.
Even at eight, I knew she was special. Different from the other girls who giggled too loud and pulled on our sleeves for attention.
But fear held me back then and has up until now.
“Earth to Hudson.” Cole snaps his fingers in front of my face. “Where’d you go?”
I shake off the memory, setting the ground beef on the counter. “Just thinking.”
“About?”
Shrugging, I tell them the truth. “When I was too chickenshit to talk to her when we were kids. I’m not making that mistake again.”
Gage raises his bottle. “To not being chickenshits.”
“To Lily,” Cole adds, clinking his bottle against ours.
“To not letting her go,” I finish, the words a promise I’m making to myself as much as to them.
We drink, and for the first time in longer than I can remember, everything feels like it’s exactly where it should be. Upstairs, Lily is unpacking her things, staying in our house, in our lives. And downstairs, the three of us are finally admitting what we’ve known all along.
This is our chance. Our shot at something real.
And I’ll be damned if I’m going to waste it.
Late that night, sleep eludes me. Every time I close my eyes, I see Matt’s face twisted with hate and hear his voice calling Lily worthless.
My father raised me to respect women. To never call them names even if I was mad, and he had every reason to be pissed after the divorce.
Mom didn’t wait long before she started dating Michelle, and even when she brought her around, Dad was cordial.
That’s why I hate knowing that Lily’s been treated like shit. A real man can have a world of problems dumped on him and still take the high road.
With a heavy sigh, I get out of bed and tug on a t-shirt, making my way downstairs. Whenever I can’t sleep, the only thing that clears my head is fresh air. I round the bottom of the stairs, heading to the deck. I pause when I spot Lily sitting cross-legged on the planks.
The soft glow of the lights and the moon surround her like a halo.
She’s staring up at the star-scattered sky, lost in her own thoughts.
My chest tightens, wondering if she’s thinking about all the ugly things Matt said to her.
He never deserved a woman like her. I grab the throw blanket from the couch and ease the door open.
She doesn’t react, doesn’t even flinch when my footsteps creak across the deck.
Without a word, I drape the blanket around her shoulders. She startles slightly at the contact, ripping her earbuds out, but settles when she realizes it’s me. “You scared me.”
“Sorry.” I lower myself beside her, close enough to feel her warmth but not quite touching.
The night air carries the scent of her floral shampoo, and I breathe her in.
I thought it might take some getting used to having a woman in our space, but with Lily it’s like it was always meant to be this way.
For a moment, we sit in comfortable silence, both of us looking up at the vast canvas above us.
The stars are brighter out here, away from the city lights, like scattered diamonds against black velvet.
I let my gaze drift sideways, studying her profile in the moonlight.
The soft curve of her cheek, the way her lashes cast shadows beneath her eyes.
She turns and catches me staring. I lift an eyebrow. Color blooms across her cheeks as she ducks her head, hiding that adorable blush. I smirk to myself. She’s so damn cute when she gets flustered. Before I can tease her about it though, she looks up again, her expression thoughtful.
“If you could have any job in the world, what would you do?”
“That’s easy. Construction.” The answer rolls off my tongue without hesitation.
She tilts her head, studying me. “Really?”
I shrug, picking at a loose thread on my jeans. “I’ve always wanted to build, ever since I was little, and it’s really the only thing I’m good at. Plus, I like making something out of nothing.”
“That’s not the only thing you’re good at.” Her voice carries absolute conviction.
My eyebrows inch toward my hairline. “Oh?”
She nods, her expression deadly serious. “You’re great at being annoying.”
I blink, shocked speechless for a heartbeat then burst into laughter that echoes across the yard. “Okay, you little shit.”
She bites her lip, fighting to hide her smile, and looks back up at the stars. The playful moment settles comfortably between us, like this is how we were always meant to be.
“I mean it though. You were always good at drawing in high school.” The sincerity in her voice makes my laughter fade.
Self-consciousness creeps up my neck. I rub at it, avoiding her gaze. “I, uh, didn’t realize you paid attention.”
“I sat behind you in math.” She shoots me a look that’s part exasperation, part fondness. “How could I not notice you always had your sketch book open rather than a notebook?”
My chest clenches. All those times I thought I was being subtle, sketching while the teacher droned on, she was watching. Here I thought she never noticed me. “Did you ever see what I was drawing?”
She shakes her head, but her eyes light up with curiosity. “No, but I wanted to. You always managed to close it before I could see.”
The weight of years-old secrets presses against my ribs.
My mind drifts to my desk drawer upstairs, to the fraying sketchbook that holds evidence of every pathetic crush, every stolen glance, every moment I wished things were different.
If there was ever a time to lay my cards on the table, to confess exactly how long I’ve been gone for this woman, it’s now.
“Do you want to see?” The words are out before I can second-guess them.
Her eyes practically glow with excitement. “You still have it?”
That’s all the encouragement I need. I shoot to my feet like I’ve been electrocuted.
“I’ll be right back.” I stride across the deck, through the house, up the stairs, grasping on to determination to keep me from backing out.
My heart hammers against my ribs as I slip into my room and yank open the desk drawer.
The sketch book sits there, worn and familiar, holding secrets I’ve never shared with anyone.
When I return to the deck, Lily makes grabby hands like an excited kid on Christmas morning. I plop down beside her, the book suddenly heavier than it should be in my palms. I may regret this. With a sigh and a prayer that this won’t blow up in my face, I hand it over.
She takes it with a delighted squeal. She smooths her hand over the battered cover like it’s made of gold.
“I swear I used to spend hours wondering what you were drawing.” Her eyes widen with panic. “Not that I was like obsessed with you or anything. It wasn’t weird. I swear. God, I’m rambling. Why can’t I stop rambling?”
“Lily?”
She freezes and looks at me. “Yeah?”
“Shut up and open the book.”
She presses her lips together, fighting a smile, and carefully opens to the first page.
The early drawings are safe enough—flowers in a vase, my mom reading on the porch, a rough sketch of the Mustang I dreamed of buying.
But then she turns the page, and I know we’ve entered dangerous territory.
She could very well scream and hit me with the book, totally freaked out about what she’s going to find, and run for the hills.
Her breath catches in her throat as she stares at the first portrait.
I look anywhere but at her face. My cheeks burn with embarrassment.
This was such a stupid idea. She probably thinks I’m some kind of stalker now.
I wait for her to slam the book shut, to demand an explanation, but all I hear is the soft whisper of pages turning.
I rub my thumb against my palm and chance a glance at her. She’s staring at a grayscale sketch of herself from junior year, the one where I tried to capture the way she looked during lunch, laughing at something Callie said.
“It’s not like I was obsessed with you or anything,” I quip, throwing her earlier words back at her.
Her gaze lifts to meet mine, something unreadable flickering in those green depths. “You drew me?”
“Unless you know someone else with those freckles.”
She doesn’t say anything. The moment stretches like eternity until she sets the book aside with reverent care and crawls into my lap.
The blanket drops to a heap on the planks.
My arms wrap around Lily automatically as her lips crash into mine, desperate and sweet and everything I’ve dreamed of for years.
Kissing her is like coming home. Like a cool glass of water after years with nothing to drink.
Her lips are soft and warm, moving against mine with growing confidence.
She sighs happily into my mouth, and I bury my fingers in her silky hair, tipping her head so I can deepen the kiss and taste every inch of her.
We only break apart when we need to breathe. She pulls back, chest rising and falling rapidly, her eyes locked on mine with a question I can read as clearly as words. Will you hurt me?
“Never,” I vow. “But it’s not just me, Lily. Me and the guys have liked you since before you and Matt started dating.”
Her forehead creases with worry. “I can’t date three guys at one time.”
“Why not? Callie did.”
She hums, thinking for a moment. “You won’t get jealous?”
“Not of them.” Honesty comes easy in the moonlight. “Anyone else, fuck yeah, but Gage and Cole are like brothers to me. I know they’ll make you happy, and that makes me happy.”
She drops her forehead to my shoulder. The warmth of her breath filtering through my shirt. “This is crazy.”
“Maybe.” I run my hand down the curve of her spine, memorizing the feel of her in my arms. “Nothing has to change. We can go back to being friends if that’s what you want.
” The words taste like ash, but I force them out anyway.
The thought of losing her now, when I’ve finally gotten a taste of what we could be, makes my chest ache.
She pulls back, studying me. “You’d let me go so easily?”
The laugh that escapes me sounds hollow even to my own ears. “No. It would tear me apart knowing I almost had you and I let you slip through my fingers, but I’m not going to make you do anything you’re not comfortable with.”
“You’re a good man, Hudson.” She sounds so certain.
“I don’t know about that.” What kind of guy falls for his best friend’s ex-girlfriend?
She shakes her head fiercely. “You are.” She pauses, wetting her lips in a way that goes straight to my cock. She threads her fingers through mine. “I can’t believe I’m saying this. Okay.”
My heart stutters. “Okay what?”
“You know.”
“Say it, Lily.” I lift our joined hands and press my lips to her knuckles. “Tell me what you want.”
With a soft exhale that carries the weight of surrender, she nods. “I want to date the three of you.”
Suddenly I’m weightless, like I could float right off this deck and into the star-filled sky. I nod, pulling her in for another kiss that tastes like possibility. “Good,” I whisper against her lips.
Here’s hoping we don’t fuck it up, because a woman like Lily is once in a lifetime.