17. June #3
“How? The only thing I want from you, you won’t give it to me.
” Sobs wreck through me and add to how fucking frustrated I am.
I don’t want to feel this way. I don’t want him to see me like this.
I don’t want to be this fucking weak—all because of a man.
Three men. Who refuse to keep any of the promises they’ve made.
“It’s not that simple.” Dom sighs. “But I’ll fix this. I’ll fix everything. And then we’ll get our happily ever after.”
“What if it’s too late for us?”
Even in the dark I can spot his jaw tense. “It will never be too late for us.” Dominic places his large hand on my cheek. “Don’t give up on me, not yet, please.”
There’s a desperation, a tenderness to his tone that’s so unfamiliar that it actually makes my heart skip a beat. I’ve gone six months in the dark, what’s another week? And if he breaks yet another of the vows he makes, then I’ll know for sure where we stand. I love him enough to give him that.
“Okay,” I whisper.
He rests his forehead against mine. “You are the only thing in this world I cherish. Give me some time, and I’ll prove that to you.”
“Okay,” I repeat, because what other options do I have.
I don’t want to be without him. I don’t want to be without Coen or Magnus, either.
I don’t even want to lose Simon, whatever we may be.
He is my friend. My constant. And without him, I don’t have anything else I can count on.
He’s been there for me more than anyone else, and it might be strictly out of obligation, but it feels like more than that.
Like maybe I matter to him, too. In a perfect world, the guys would stop being so fucking controlling and distant, and Simon would still be around.
But that’s the thing about life, it’s far from perfect.
“I’ll call my pilot and make arrangements for tomorrow,” Dominic says.
“What?”
“Me and you. Let’s skip town for a day. We can go up north. I know a good bed and breakfast in Washington.”
“Washington, like the state?” I ask him.
“Yeah, you ever been?” He skims his thumb over my cheek.
“No, never.” I leave out the part where I’ve never been out of California, let alone traveled to another state.
I grew up poor, and I’ve remained that way until they came into my life.
Surviving was always the main goal, not going on trips.
Hell, the only reason I’ve seen the ocean is because we live sort of close to the coast. Coen and I spent a lot of our time together there, getting burnt during the day and laying under the stars at night.
I guess that’s one of the perks of having a dead mother and deadbeat dad—lack of parental supervision. I’m not entirely sure if my father knew I wasn’t home, or if he would have cared if he found out I was with a boy.
It wasn’t just any boy, though. The majority of my childhood years were spent with the blond-haired, blue-eyed kid who would have risked his life to ensure my safety. Not much has really changed, aside from him turning into a massive prick.
A shudder runs through me at the memory of him glaring at me like he hated my guts earlier. I shove the thought aside and focus on the man holding me in his arms.
I’m so small here, tucked away in his grasp. Oh, how I’ve longed for this much attention from him. It’s a different kind than when we’re fucking. Even with our clothes on, this is somehow much more intimate.
“What do you think?” Dom glides his finger to tuck my hair behind my ear. “Want to run away with me?”
I draw in a breath and consider my options. I could say no—break both of our hearts, or I could say yes, and put mine on the line to be broken once again.
“Yes…”
A sly grin forms on his face.
“But,” I add. “If you so much as even think about no-call-no-showing me, I will hunt you down and make you wish you never met me.”
Dom presses his plush lips against mine, his beard bristling my face. “I would expect nothing less from you.”
I chew at the inside of my cheek. “I left Cora out there alone.”
“She’s with Alec, she’s fine.”
“They’re flirting,” I tell him. “That’s not good.”
“Alec’s harmless.”
“But he’s…”
“He wouldn’t be your driver if I didn’t think he was a stand-up guy.”
Dominic assures me but it doesn’t make me any less suspicious about someone from this world infiltrating my sweet best friend’s life.
The light in my bedroom flicks on and someone enters. The illumination fills the entry of my bathroom enough that I'm sure Dom can finally see my swollen eyes and red cheeks.
“Princess?” Magnus calls through the empty space.
“In here,” I tell him while remaining on Dom’s lap.
Magnus pops his head around the bathroom door, craning it one way, and then at us. “Christ, there you are.” He kneels beside us. “What are you guys doing down here?”
I sigh. “Long story.”
Magnus holds out his arms. “I can take over.” He glances up at Dom. “You’re needed elsewhere.” They exchange a look like they’re telling a secret that I’m not supposed to know.
I roll my eyes and stand, Dom finally letting me go. I flip the switch to turn the vanity light on. “Fuck.” Me and crying are not friends.
Some girls are cute when they cry. Me on the other hand…I’m a mix between stung by a bunch of bees and haven’t slept for thirteen years. And with my pale complexion, the crimson gives off an unpleasant what the fuck happened to her kind of reaction.
“Tomorrow.” Dom points at me in the mirror. “Have a bag packed by noon. Okay?”
“Don’t make me regret saying yes.”
He strolls over and kisses the top of my head. “I won’t.” Dom leaves the room, and Magnus makes his way over, gripping my shoulders and turning me toward him.
“Who do I need to kill?” He studies my fucked-up face.
“I’m fine, don’t worry, no one needs to die today.” Although, I wouldn’t mind putting a flaming bag of shit in Coen’s bed for him to find when he comes home.
Maybe I’ll mail him one of those glitter bombs or add his phone number to every single spam website I can find.
I might really fucking dislike him right now but I can’t imagine actually doing something that would harm him, even if he did rip my heart out of my chest and stomp on it—not only once, but twice.
“I heard Simon shot someone tonight.” Magnus keeps his hands on me. “Are you okay?”
I nod and steady my blurry gaze on him. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
"Um, because he fucking murdered someone, princess.
And you sort of got shot once upon a time.
That's a massive trigger." Magnus releases me and reaches for a washcloth, dipping it under running water and bringing it to my face. He blots at my cheeks and tries to remove the mascara streaking them black. “You’re allowed to be human and feel things.”
“That’s why you think I’m a wreck?” I take the rag and wipe my face more aggressively than he was.
“What else would it be?” He leans against the counter and watches me in the mirror.
“Coen freaked out on me earlier.” I shouldn’t tell him, but I do, because I don’t want him to assume I’m emotional about some dead guy I don’t give a shit about. That asshole deserved to die for all the chaos he was trying to cause. And if Simon hadn’t done it, I would have.
Magnus balls his hand into a fist but remains otherwise collected. “What happened?”
“He accused me of cheating.”
“With Beckett,” he adds.
“Yeah.”
Magnus shakes his head. “What a fucking idiot.”
“My thoughts exactly.”
“I’m sorry, princess.” He stands and wraps his arm around my shoulder and tugs me toward him. “You didn’t deserve that.”
“Maybe I did,” I confess.
Magnus tugs his bottom lip in between his teeth and rolls it out. “Have you and Beckett…” He stops himself. “No, fuck it, I don’t give a shit if you did. It doesn’t change things between us. Right?”
I let out a big breath and turn toward him. “For the record, we haven’t. I’m not romantically interested in Simon. He’s my bodyguard, that’s it.”
A throat clears in the doorway of my bathroom.
Simon stands there, his gaze trained on me. “I was, uh…” He rubs at his neck. “Coming to check on you. But I’ll go.”
He turns to walk away and I call out to him. “Simon.”
But he doesn’t stop.
“Simon,” I say louder.
Magnus puts his hand on my shoulder. “I think you hurt his feelings, princess.”
Great, as if things weren’t rocky enough, now he’s upset with me, too.