34. Grace
Chapter 34
Grace
“Woohoo!” Hendrix whoops, cupping his hands around his mouth. “Excellent!”
I execute another turn on the motorcycle. It rained yesterday, so Hendrix has taken me out to a muddy patch of dirt road and is teaching me how to handle the bike in those sorts of conditions.
“It’s better to practice in a controlled environment like this so you’re ready in case you get caught out in a storm unawares,” he explains.
It makes sense, and it’s turned out not as scary as I feared. First, Hendrix had me hold on while he drove and he purposefully skidded a bit in the mud, then got out of it. Now, it’s my turn.
As I go through the mud and successfully don’t let it stop me, getting out of fishtails and avoiding getting my wheels stuck, I feel a swell of pride in my chest like a golden bubble. I’m sure that it’s not my own. I’m almost certain it’s Hendrix.
It’s something I’ve noticed more and more since the rodeo. I don’t want to turn out to be crazy so I haven’t said anything, but I can’t help but notice the way an emotion will wash over me, an emotion that I know I’m not having. For one thing, it won’t make sense for me to have it—anxiety where I feel calm, joy where I feel tired—and for another, it doesn’t feel like mine. I don’t know how to describe it, since it’s an emotion, but it’s almost like my emotions are one color, or perhaps one note of music, and these emotions are another.
It's instinctive, and I’m sure I’d sound insane if I said it out loud, but I know what I’m feeling.
I bring the motorcycle to a halt in front of Hendrix and place my foot down to brace, and Hendrix claps. “You’re getting a lot better at this.”
“Thanks.” I grin at him. I’m still not comfortable getting to high speeds but my control is getting a lot better.
The pride pulses through me, warm and welcoming as the sun. I swallow. “Hey, can I ask you something?”
“Go for it.”
“I feel… okay, this will sound crazy.”
“Jesse calls you ‘wildcard’ for a reason, darlin’. We already know you’re crazy.”
I chuckle, then take a deep breath. “Well, in that case, here goes. It’s like I can feel how proud of me you are.”
“I’m glad. I want you to know how proud I am.”
“No, no, I mean I can literally feel it. It’s like there’s this sun inside of my chest, warming me up.”
“Oh?” Hendrix’s tone is neutral. I can’t tell what he’s thinking.
“It’s not the first time I’ve felt something like this. I’ve felt like the past few days… ever since the rodeo, honestly… as if I can feel at times what you all are feeling.”
My words come out slowly, hesitantly. I don’t want him to think I’m insane.
But Hendrix just nods, looking thoughtful. “It’s not uncommon for something like this to happen. Especially after we’ve been with you through your heat.”
“It’s—it’s not?” I give a nervous laugh. “I thought I was imagining it.”
“You’re not, definitely.” He grins. “It’s a real thing.”
I swallow. “Is it… um… a thing that happens between Alphas and their mates?”
“It can,” Hendrix says, his tone still calm and casual. “But just because you feel our emotions sometimes and vice versa doesn’t mean that you’re stuck with us.” His voice lowers a bit, getting more serious. “You’re not trapped here.”
Relief seeps through me and I nod, a knot of anxiety that I hadn’t even realized was in the pit of my stomach dissipating. “Thank you.”
Hendrix smiles at me. “It’s up to you to accept an Alpha or an Alpha pack’s bites. That’s what will seal the mating bond. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want—and if you never want a bite, that’s okay too.”
I nod, grateful for the reassurance. And yet… I feel oddly sad when Hendrix says never .
Just a few short months ago the idea of receiving a bite and mating with an Alpha, or a pack of Alphas, was terrifying to me. I didn’t even want to consider it. Maybe someday, but that ‘someday’ didn’t matter, because all that mattered was my career and getting it back on track.
Now… now I don’t know. It makes me sad to think I would never in my life join with someone so intimately. I think I might actually want that—the real life version of the romances I edit and publish and, even if it’s just as a hobby, write.
Hendrix must notice that I’m starting to get stuck in my thoughts, because he grins and nudges me with his elbow. “Come on, let’s get back on that bike. It’s time to try something new. I think you’re ready.”
“Okay.” I’m not sure what we could possibly do next, but I get back on the bike like I’m told.
To my surprise, Hendrix climbs on behind me.
“What do you want me to do?” I ask, a little nervous.
I’m not sure if I’m good enough to do any fancy tricks with Hendrix sitting behind me. Something I’ve learned as I’ve gotten better at this is that Hendrix is right, it really is all about the center of balance and how you lean forward, back, or side to side on the bike.
But I trust Hendrix. If he thinks that I can do this, then I trust his faith in me. I trusted in him at the rodeo while he didn’t have faith in himself, and that worked out spectacularly for him. I’m still so proud of how he did. I’m sure this will turn out fine too.
So I take a deep breath, and I rev the engine. “All right.”
“Just take her down the road,” Hendrix instructs. “No fancy tricks, just head toward the main road.”
I nod and start forward, going only about ten miles an hour.
As always, it feels so intimate to be on his bike with Hendrix. Our bodies are so pressed together and the rumble of the engine vibrating beneath us is just so sexy. I love it.
“It’s been amazing to watch you face your fears,” Hendrix tells me over the rumble of the bike. I smile through the shiver his voice and the wind’s hiss on my skin bring. “You’ve gotten so good at riding. And I won’t lie, seeing you on the bike is a real turn on.”
One of his hands leaves my waist, wrapping around to my stomach. His fingertips trace a few gentle circles there, then snake up my ribs to my breast. He cups it in his hand and gives it a gentle squeeze, making my breath catch.
“Hendrix,” I whimper, and he releases his grip on my breast without dropping it from his hand.
“Just say the word if you need me to stop. Can you stay focused?”
I’m not entirely sure I can, but I don’t want him to stop either. Adrenaline courses through me, a heady mixture of the thrill of the ride combined with his strong, wandering hands on my body. I juice the accelerator a little, hoping it’s enough of an answer for him, and when his hand moves down my body to slip between my legs, I can’t fight the goosebumps that sweep across my skin—or the arousal that roars through me immediately after.
Hendrix’s fingers work my clit through my shorts, testing my ability to keep my eyes on the road as we whip down it.
“You never stop surprising me, darlin’,” he purrs in my ear, his lips dancing across my lobe. “You’re always full speed ahead. It’s what I love about you.”
My shorts dampen at his words, and he continues massaging my clit as sparks dance through me. I want to throw my head back, to feel the wind whipping through my hair as he gets me off, but I have to pay attention to what I’m doing. As much as I want him, I want to show him how good I’ve gotten at riding just as badly.
The way he’s dragging his fingers across my electric clit makes it harder and harder to keep my eyes on the road with every passing second. The thrill and danger of what we’re doing is getting me seriously close to orgasm, and I’m not at all sure I’ll be able to keep the bike steady at this speed if he makes me come.
But he’s making me feel so good that I’d sooner crash than tell him to stop. I let up on the accelerator just as Hendrix turns up the intensity, grinding his palm down against my clit and pulling a moan out of me. He instinctually reaches around me for the handlebars with his free hand and wraps it around mine, lacing our fingers together while he continues working my clit with the other.
The rumble of the engine humming between my legs and the feeling of his coarse palm working me through my shorts sends me over the edge. My orgasm spikes through me in fits and starts, and I writhe against him, roaring along with the wind in my ears. Hendrix kisses and bites at my neck but I never take my eyes off the road or my hands off the bars, no matter how intense the waves grow.
When it’s finally over, I pull the bike off the side of the road, kill the engine, and throw the kickstand down with my foot. I’m still trying to catch my breath.
“You’ve gotten really good,” Hendrix growls in my ear. “And you did so well staying focused.”
I whimper and crane my neck to kiss him, hungry and desperate for him. My legs are still vibrating from the rumble of the engine between them and the intensity of the release he just gave me. Hendrix keeps kissing me as he climbs off the bike, breaking it only long enough to climb off before his lips are on mine again.
He drags me off afterward, then hoists me up by the thighs and sets me back down on the bike, riding side saddle. His lips crash into mine again, forcing them apart, and he cups my face in both of his powerful hands.
“I need you,” I whisper between kisses, and he growls in response.
“I could never deny you. I need you just as badly.” He easily lifts me off the bike again and turns me around. “Hands on the bike. Careful to avoid the hot spots.”
I nod through the tightness in my throat because I know what’s coming—and I can barely wait for it. I spread my fingers across the leather seat and jut my ass backward at him. He tugs my shorts and panties down to my ankles in one go.
“Good girl. Now spread ’em.” Gravel crunches under my feet as I step out of my shorts and slide one boot away from the other. “Mm. Look how fucking wet you already are,” he says as his hands weave between my legs and run over every inch of exposed, wet, glistening skin.
“Please, Hendrix. Fuck me,” I say through a throat dry and scratchy with need. One of his hands snakes up to my lower back where he applies a little bit of pressure, forcing me to arch it for him.
“Don’t worry, darlin’, I’ve got you.” I whimper at the sound of his zipper and can’t help glancing over my shoulder to watch him strip off his jeans. His cock springs free of his pants, and he takes it in one hand, stroking it for me before he drags it through my wet folds to tease me and slick his length. “I love how wet I make you. How eager you are for me.”
“I can’t get enough.”
“That makes two of us.”
I shudder as he lines up and starts to push into me, and my back arches further on its own. We fall forward together until I’m resting my forearms and elbows on the seat of the bike and Hendrix is buried inside me. I’ve lost track of the number of times we’ve done this at this point, but this time feels different in a way I can’t pinpoint. It isn’t just sex. It’s more than the primal need and hunger I usually feel.
As he throbs inside me, something else does too. It’s a deep, intense connection I’ve only felt hints of before that’s warm and growing brighter like a coal in a fire. The only word I can think of to describe how it feels is… complete.
I feel whole with him inside me like this. Like this is exactly where I’m supposed to be and who I’m supposed to be with.
Hendrix rolls his hips backward, slowly pulling himself out of me, and I can’t help gripping him as he does. He groans his approval, then crashes back into me, rocking the bike beneath us with the force of it, but the kickstand is sturdy and keeps us all upright.
Hendrix doesn’t seem to notice or care though as he picks up the pace, driving in and out of me like a man possessed. He even starts to use the swing of the bike to help get deeper into me, timing his thrusts so that I’m rocking backward onto his cock as he pushes into me like I’m in a sling. My fingernails dig into the leather cushion, and I throw my head back in pleasure.
I glance over my shoulder at him to find his eyes are intensely focused on watching his cock disappear in and out of me. But he spots me watching and glances up at me with his eyes so full of passion that they look like melted emeralds swirling in the fire between us.
I wonder if he’s feeling the same connection, the same deepness I am.
Like he can read my thoughts, he reaches both hands up to my shoulders and grips them tightly to brace himself so he can increase the pace again, clapping and slamming into my cheeks so hard and fast that I’m amazed we haven’t knocked the bike over. A car hurtles past on the road beside us, and I’m sure they got a show they weren’t asking for, but we’re both too lost to the sensation to give a damn.
“Come for me,” Hendrix grunts through short breaths. “Fucking melt for me.”
His words give me chills and make an orgasm swell. I couldn’t hold it back even if I tried, so I rest my face on the leather seat and hold on to the bike for dear life as it roars through me. My body shudders and my knees give, but Hendrix keeps me upright by the shoulders and doesn’t let up until his own release overwhelms him.
He bottoms out in me, pulling me backward into him by the shoulders, and grunts as he goes rigid. I feel him spasming inside me, flooding me with his warmth, and let out a little gasp as his knot swells and locks us together.
Panting, he falls forward onto me, kissing my shoulder and neck.
I smile against the leather, feeling the most sated I’ve felt in a while. “Thank you.”
He laughs against me. “Always, darlin’.”