Chapter 23 - Asher
“Hey, Ash, can you come here for a minute?” The voice was Jake’s, so I stepped away from what I was doing and went to see what I could do for him.
I found him standing just outside, staring up at the roof of the post office, grimacing and shielding his eyes from the sun. “What’s going on?”
He sighed deeply and turned to me. “It looks like there’s more damage up there than we initially realized.”
“Oh, shit.”
He nodded and pressed his fingers to his temples for a moment. “Turns out, there are some trusses that are going to need to be completely replaced.”
My stomach turned at the thought of having to get on the roof. “We’ve already installed the decorative woodwork,” I protested.
He grimaced and nodded again. “We’re just going to have to redo those later. The roofer found some wood rot while he was up there. At least two trusses need to be completely replaced. We’re going to check the rest, but…”
“Yeah,” I murmured, grateful that Tyler would be the one going up on the roof to pull the measurements and install the trusses.
Jake glanced over at Max, who was watching another shot unfold nearby, before looking back at me and continuing. “I don’t know how we missed this during the initial inspection. I thought I’d covered every last square inch of this place.”
I shrugged. “It happens. Don’t be too hard on yourself. I'll have Tyler get up there first thing tomorrow and measure so we can start cutting and building.”
Jake clapped a hand on my shoulder. “Thanks. I knew you'd be on it in no time.”
I headed back inside to keep working on things when I realized that my apprentice was nowhere to be found.
“Anyone seen Tyler?” I was met with a round of “nos” and shaking heads.
He was one of the most reliable guys I knew, so I wasn’t terribly concerned.
He’d be back, I was sure of it. A few minutes later, I got back to work.
One of the reasons I liked working in carpentry was the fact that there was no room for distraction.
Everything needed my focus and careful attention.
There was no space for letting my mind wander to how I’d rather be spending time with the hot set designer instead of using the jigsaw, for example.
By the time Tyler had rejoined me, I was mostly done with the cuts I needed to make. I killed the power to the saw and looked up at him, pulling my safety goggles off. “Everything okay?”
He shrugged and tilted his head side to side a little. “Sorry about that. It’s my sister. Her baby is on the way. My mom just called to let me know they’re all headed to the hospital. First grandchild and all.”
I beamed immediately. “Tyler! That’s awesome!”
“Thanks.” He grinned back. “It is pretty exciting.”
“What are you waiting for? Go!” I made a shooing motion with my hands.
He gestured at the roof. “Jake said some trusses need to be replaced. I was just going to go up and measure them before I left.”
My chest squeezed tight when I put the pieces together in my mind. I shook my head vehemently. “Absolutely not. Get out of here. Go.”
“But—”
“Go,” I insisted. “I’ll figure out the rest.”
He finally gave in, nodding and pulling his phone out. “Okay. Thanks, boss.”
“Don’t even mention it. This is a big deal. Way more important things are happening there than here with the roof trusses.”
With that, he tapped his phone and put it up to his ear to make a call, walking away and waving at the same time.
As he left, my stomach sank, my mind reeling.
There had to be a way to avoid the roof, right?
I sighed and wiped the wood shavings and sawdust from my face with one hand.
At least I have until tomorrow to figure it out.
That evening, I tried to relax on the couch after physical therapy.
Instead, all I could think about was how I’d be getting on a ladder the next day.
My mind raced, bouncing between trying to get out of it and trying to tell myself I’d be fine and I was being stupid to worry.
Maybe Jake could take the measurements. Or…
someone else. Hell, anyone else. After a half hour of stressing, my phone buzzed with an incoming text.
I frowned and glanced at my phone, thinking it might be an update from Tyler.
Instead, it was Micah. One word, followed by a winking emoji.
Micah: Busy?
I half-smiled at the phone, heart fluttering in my chest. I wanted to answer him honestly.
I also wanted to invite him to come over and help me de-stress and focus on something else for a little while, which is what I suspected he’d had in mind when he’d texted.
What I wanted most of all, though, was someone to talk to about the sense of dread and impending doom hanging over me.
Asher: Not terribly. Just having a panic attack. You?
His reply came almost immediately.
Micah: Wait, what? Are you okay?
Asher: I’ve been better.
Micah: What’s wrong?
Asher: Have you heard the phrase, “face your fears”?
Micah: Yeah, of course.
Asher: Looks like I get to do just that tomorrow with the entire production team’s eyes on me.
The dots appeared that indicated he was typing, before they disappeared, reappeared, and disappeared again. A moment later, my phone rang, Micah’s number dancing on my screen.
“Hey,” I murmured, trying to keep an even tone.
“Are you okay?”
My laugh was weak, even to my own ears. “Yeah, I’m fine. I’m probably just being dramatic. Don’t worry about me.”
“Tell me what’s going on.”
“It’s nothing, really.”
Micah’s tone was firm. “Ash.”
“I’m just stressed about work. That’s all.”
“Asher.”
I sighed softly, caving in. “Fine. Jake told me today that the roof trusses, at least two of them, need full replacing. Apparently the roofers found a leak nobody had noticed before, and the wood is rotting through. I have to get up on the roof tomorrow to measure the pieces and start fabricating as quickly as possible.”
“Yeah,” he murmured. “I heard about that through the grapevine. Max had a full-on fit when he heard. He’s stressing about the timeline. The roofers are going to a different job while that’s being repaired. They can’t afford to just wait around and do nothing.”
“I know,” I said. My voice sounded miserable.
“What’s wrong with that? Are you worried about the timeline? Not getting it done quickly enough?”
I laughed, but it was a harsh sound. “I wish that’s what I was worried about. But no. I’m… remember the night we had to go by the job site? I had to get on a ladder to do some measurements.”
“You’re afraid of falling again?”
“That’s the short version.”
He was quiet for a few moments. “I’d like to hear the long version, if you’re comfortable with telling me.”
His voice was soothing, reassuring. I took a deep breath and told him everything.
I told him about how, after he’d moved away, Eric had convinced me to get on the garage roof.
How I’d lost my footing and fallen. How I’d been terrified of heights ever since.
My voice wavered as I explained. I even went into detail about that night he’d been there when I’d fallen.
“I was so confident,” I said. “I thought everything would be fine. It had been so long since the first fall. I was sure I was just making something out of nothing. And then…”
“And then you ended up with a concussion and a dislocated shoulder.”
“Exactly. And now my fear of heights is worse than it’s ever been.” By the time I’d finished explaining, my heart was pounding and I was literally sweating, even my palms.
“Would it help if I took the measurements for you? Or Jake? Someone else, so you don't have to?”
I thought about it and a resolve formed in my gut.
“It would, but someone has to install them, too.
And even if we have Jake or the roofers do that, I don't want to just shirk my responsibility because I'm scared. This is my job. Literally.” The part about not wanting to avoid it just because I was scared was more true than I’d realized.
I hadn't planned to say it. Micah was bringing truths out of me that I didn't even know I had.
The phone line was silent for a long moment before Micah spoke again. “Tell me something. What’s the scariest part about heights for you?”
“What?”
He cleared his throat and repeated himself. “What scares you? Is it the ladder not feeling stable? Having to step from the ladder to the roof? Looking down? Something else?”
“Everything feels unstable up there. Like if I make one wrong move, I’m down for the count.”
“Okay. Well, what if I put a stabilizer on the ladder and have someone spot you?”
“You spotted me before and I still fell.”
He hummed, and I imagined him nodding, his lips pinched together as he let that thought process.
When he spoke again, his voice was steady and even, reassuring.
“Here’s what we’re going to do. I’m going to get your ladder stabilized.
We’ll get you a harness. The roofer’s crew was going to use harnesses anyway, so we’ve got the equipment.
We’ll get you set up with the fall protection system.
Then once you’re up there safely, you can take the measurements and climb down. ”
“What if—”
“Don’t. Don’t ‘what-if’ yourself. I’m going to be there for you. With you. I’ll make sure of it. I’ll make sure nobody rushes you or anything. You can do this.”
I swallowed the lump forming in my throat. “I don’t know if I can.”
“Hey. I know you can. You can use my certainty until you have your own.”
My laugh came out a little watery, and I scrubbed one hand over my face while I held the phone in my other hand. “Thanks.”
“Of course,” he said softly. “I’m going to talk to Max in the morning. I’m not going to tell him what you said, just what we need to do. That’s part of my job, so it won’t feel out of place. Do you need anything else?”
I need to touch you right now. The thought fluttered unexpectedly through my mind. Instead, I took a deep breath. “No. I think I’ll be okay for now. Thank you.”
“Of course. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Thanks. See you tomorrow.”
As we hung up, the nerves in my stomach had settled and I felt less like throwing up.
I still wasn’t thrilled at the idea of climbing onto the roof of the post office, but at least I knew Micah would be watching out for me.
I was sure he’d make it as safe as possible—not that Max and Jake wouldn’t have done the same, but knowing he was watching out for me specifically felt different. Reassuring. Warm.
I went to bed not long after our call ended, trying hard to think about anything but what I had to do the next day.