Chapter 4
Four
Eloise
I wait until the last few players on the team disappear into the hall, trying to run my brain through the nightmare that was the practice we just finished. I’m still dressed in my gear, because I know I’m going out there.
I didn’t get much time to practice and show off despite it being the first day of training camp.
I know that the coaching staff wanted to see all the players there.
They’re going to have to cut down the thirty to twenty-six soon enough, and it’s only a week long.
But I also got paired with Taylor every chance they could give us, and it was tense, aggressive, and we pushed each other around until we nearly came to blows.
I take a deep breath, holding it for a minute and releasing it, trying to lower the intensity of the anxiety coursing through me. I have six more days to show them what I’m made of. I need to be fast and push hard to do it.
I can’t let Taylor trip me up like she did today.
There’s not a soul in the building as I step back towards the ice, watching it glisten for a moment more. I enjoy the smell, that crisp scent of potential. It feels like home. This whole place does. I want it to be home.
I want to be a Vortex so badly.
I step back onto the ice, pushing off and gliding. It’s not going to be a crazy post-practice workout, but there’s definitely going to be some sweat. I do a few light laps along the boards before taking a sip of my water and fiddling with my watch.
The back of my neck prickles, and I feel someone watching me. Looking up and around, I see a person standing in the tunnel. I jump, trying to suppress the shudder that I feel as they storm in.
My stomach sinks when I realize it’s Taylor.
She looks fucking livid. Green eyes blazing, blonde hair dark from sweat and tied back into a ponytail. She’s still got all of her gear on too, and she’s at least a few inches taller than me in skates, which is intimidating to say the least.
I try not to focus on the freckles that dot her cheeks and nose when she stands in front of me and the bench.
“You shouldn’t be here,” she snaps, and I wince.
“Sorry—you know, I just wanted to get some extra practice in.”
She sneers. “No, I mean, on the team.”
My blood freezes in my veins. “I-well, I didn’t choose this,” I say. She has to know this. I know she and Rose were a hell of a duo. I played them a lot last year, and they were phenomenal to watch. “You know what the trades are like.”
Her sneer transforms into a scowl, her upper lip pulling at the edge. I’d say it’s without her knowledge that she did it, but I think that she’s genuinely pissed about me being here.
Fair enough, I guess.
If she had joined the Chill, I can’t say I’d have given her a warm reception.
“You’re going to leave and join another team, or I’m going to make your life fucking miserable.”
I sigh, “There’s no other team that’s opening their training camp. It’s either here or I’m done.”
“Then be done,” she says coldly.
“I can’t give up my livelihood yet.” I give her a small smile, hoping that she realizes what a bitch thing that was to say. “I still want to win the Cup.”
“You’re not going to win it with us.”
“I can better your chances,” I say, “You know I’m good at my job; you’ve played against me enough to know that I’m better on your team than against.”
“You’re not going to be on this team. What don’t you understand?” She snaps again. “You’re going to leave and never play again, or I’m going to make your life miserable.”
I take a moment to breathe, to pretend that what she’s saying isn’t destroying me emotionally. That every little brick I build through the day to make sure I’m impervious to doubt feels shaky in its slot as she stares at me down.
“A life without hockey will be just as miserable as one where you’re doing your worst,” I say, leaning in close to her. I look up at her, watching her pupils dilate as we get into each other’s faces. “So, do your worst.”
She pushes me, and I go gliding. She skates onto the ice.
I grab hold of her jersey as she tries to rush past, and push her back.
She scowls, and we’re in this weird pushing match, each one trying to push the other harder, and every time she gets in my face, a waft of her perfume and sweat rushes over me.
It’s a scent that makes me a little lightheaded, and I hate that I find it so attractive.
And the way she scowls at me.
She stares at me, nostrils flaring, and suddenly the pushing match is getting much more real, and she fists my practice jersey, the pink drawing her in like a bull is drawn to red.
“I’m not leaving here!” I snap, getting into her face.
Her breath fawns across my face, and my stomach swoops at how close we are.
“Is everything alright here?” A voice calls out, and I push back from her. My cheeks burn at the thought of anyone seeing us in that position. She’s straight; she’s very obviously engaged to her university boyfriend. She hates my guts.
And I’m gay, but I’m not out to anyone here.
Fuck, there’s another thing to add to my list.
“Yeah! So sorry!” I call out, locating the janitor up in the stands. He has his hands on his hips as he looks down on us. Taylor doesn’t seem to want to turn around, and I have to prod her to wave at him as well. She gives him a tight-lipped smile.
“Don’t worry, Dave! Everything is good here. We’re heading out soon!”
He waves back and shuffles off. She turns toward me, jaw set.
“We’re at an impasse then.”
I nod. “See you tomorrow?”
“Only if you’re going to see this through.” She narrows her eyes. I can’t say that her game face scares me. It hasn’t been since college.
“Yeah, and when we win the Walter, you’re going to regret being such a raging bitch about me,” I declare and push past her to skate and get undressed.
I let my breath out slowly, hoping it doesn’t betray how rattled I feel.
She stays on the ice as I skate off, and I storm out of the arena like I’m on fire, which is how my soul feels, engulfed by the rage she can pull out of me.
It’s a special skill of hers that I’m still wondering about.
How does she know my buttons better than I do?
I strip and shower quickly, getting out of the locker room before she comes in and heading home to the hotel that I’m currently living out of until I can find a roommate or a single apartment.
Once I close the door behind me in my hotel room, I drop my bag and fall face first onto the bed and fall asleep.