Chapter 34
Milow
I tried to read, but I couldn’t focus. Every time my eyes moved over the page, I felt Ashby looking at me. It didn’t make me uncomfortable, but it made my cheeks burn. And it got worse every time our eyes met.
The others noticed. I could tell because they kept glancing between us. Jasper most of all. He had that knowing look on his face, like he’d figured us out a long time ago. But he didn’t say anything.
When they finished their workout, Ashby came over to me with a smile on his handsome face. I closed my book and looked up at him, sure my face was bright red by now.
“Hey. We’re going to take a shower, then head to the diner. Are you hungry?”
I nodded. I’d only had half a banana and one bite of Stan’s protein bar. I still didn’t understand how they ate those things. The taste alone felt like punishment. But apparently, it helped with their muscles or something.
[I’ll wait here,] I signed, smiling up at him. [You looked good doing the shoulder workouts.]
My hands moved before I could stop them.
Ashby grinned. His shirt was off, and it was hard not to look. He needed strong shoulders for swimming, but everything else about him was perfect, too.
“Yeah?” he said. “So you watched me?”
He already knew the answer. And he’d watched me too, even though sitting and reading wasn’t exactly as impressive or sexy as him working out.
[Maybe.]
His grin widened. He glanced toward the others, already heading for the locker rooms.
When they disappeared around the corner, he turned back and leaned down, bracing his hands on either side of me on the couch. Then he kissed me.
I kissed him back right away. I’d missed his lips. I smiled into the kiss and lifted my hand to the side of his neck. He stayed close after pulling back, his eyes looking into mine.
“I love you,” he whispered, rubbing his nose gently against mine.
I smiled and rested my forehead against his, closing my eyes for a second before looking at him again. [I love you too.]
“Forever?” he asked quietly.
I nodded. [And always.]
He smiled and pressed another kiss to my lips, then he stood upright and stretched his arms. “I’ll be right back.”
[Okay.] I watched him head to the locker rooms, and because I couldn’t seem to focus on the book in this gym anyway, I decided to text Scottie and see how she was doing. I pulled out my phone and sent her a text.
Me
Hi. How are you, Scottie?
It only took her a few seconds to read my message. I waited for her reply.
Scottie
Hi. Good. I think.
I hesitated. I didn’t have to tell her that I already knew about what happened between her and Stan last night. She probably suspected it, but I knew she wouldn’t be mad about it.
Me
I’m here to listen if you want to talk about it. <3
Scottie
I know. You’re the best. <3
I bit my lip, thumbs hovering over the screen for a while before I typed again.
Me
We’re going to the diner for breakfast in a bit. Do you want to come?
I paused, then added another message.
Me
Stan will be there too. He’s worried. I think he’d really like you to come.
Her reply took longer this time. I imagined her staring at her screen and thinking.
Whatever had happened last night between them hadn’t come from cruelty.
I knew that. I’d felt a shift in her mood lately.
She was more distant and fragile, but only in certain moments, and there was never really an obvious trigger.
Scottie
Okay. I’ll come.
Relief settled in my chest. I replied right away.
Me
Do you want us to pick you up? Bennett’s driving. His mom’s minivan has room for all of us.
Scottie
No. I’ll meet you there.
Me
Okay. See you then :)
Scottie
See you later :)
At the diner, Scottie wasn’t there yet. She said she’d walk, so it would’ve taken her a little longer to get here. While she was on her way, we all squeezed into one booth. I was sitting between Ashby and Stan, and Bennett and Jasper were sitting opposite us.
We had already ordered our food, and while Bennett and Stan argued about some new video game, I looked out the window, hoping to see Scottie walk up to the diner soon.
Ashby’s hand rested on my thigh, and I snapped my eyes to him, finding him already watching me. I smiled and placed my hand on his, and he turned his palm up to slide his fingers through mine.
“Do you want to hang out with me this afternoon?” he asked quietly.
It was such an innocent and sweet question that it made my heart skip a beat, and my cheeks turned red once again. Ashby had been my best friend since we were little, and I found it admirable and sweet that he still asked me to hang out, instead of just assuming that I would.
Of course, I would hang out with him even without him asking, but little things like that proved that he cared about what I thought and wanted.
I nodded slowly, tilting my head to the side and pressing my cheek against his shoulder in an attempt to stop my shyness. I had no reason to be shy with him. He knew me better than anyone else. And still, he managed to get me to blush and grin like an idiot.
His lips curled into a smirk as he squeezed my hand gently.
Needing to avoid his gaze before my face turned into a tomato, I looked out the window, only to see Scottie walking right toward the diner. I smiled, sitting up straighter.
Ashby followed my gaze, smiling when he saw her. “Did you text her?”
I nodded and turned my head when the bell above the door sounded, and seconds later, Scottie stood at the end of our table.
I waved and smiled, and the others said hi to her.
All but Stan. He just stared up at her while Scottie played with her fingers, avoiding his gaze.
I was scared they would start to argue, and for a moment, it really seemed that way.
But then Stan got up and pulled Scottie into a tight hug.
He rubbed her back, and she clung to his sweater.
Relief washed over me, and Ashby’s tension eased too.
“I’m sorry,” I heard Scottie murmur into Stan’s chest.
“You don’t have to apologize,” he assured her with a sigh. He pulled back and looked down at her with a smile. “I’m glad you came.”
Scottie smiled back, and as they turned to sit down, Jasper got up from his spot and came to sit next to me, where Stan had been sitting before. He wanted them to sit together, and so Stan slid in next to Bennett, then Scottie followed.
I slid my hand out of Ashby’s and waited for Scottie to look at me. [I ordered orange juice and chocolate chip pancakes for you. Oh, and a bowl of fruit we can share.]
She smiled at me and lifted her hands. [Thank you, Milow. You’re the best.]
Our food came a moment later, and we all ate while holding casual conversations. I nodded or shook my head at questions thrown my way, and when we were all done, I tapped Jasper’s shoulder to get his attention.
“Yeah?” he asked, smiling at me. “What’s up, Milow?”
[I need to go to the bathroom.] I pressed my lips together, unsure if I should’ve told Ashby first, because I knew Jasper didn’t know ASL.
But instead of frowning or looking at the others for help, Jasper asked, “Sign that again.”
I blinked and lifted my hands. [I need to go to the bathroom.]
“Bathroom!” he exclaimed. “That’s the sign for bathroom, right?”
My eyes widened, and I quickly nodded.
“Shit, dude… are you learning ASL?” Stan asked.
“Not really.” Jasper smiled and got up, clearly having understood what I signed. “I read this book at my dad’s office at the clinic. You know, he’s an ENT and has that kind of stuff lying around. It’s pretty interesting. I might actually start learning it.”
“You should,” Scottie told him. “It’s pretty cool knowing how to sign. It’s been like our secret language all these years.”
I nodded again, thinking it was really cool of him to consider it. I knew he wasn’t doing it for me directly, but I appreciated every single person in my close circle who put in the time and effort to learn to speak my language.
And while there had been many who understood me, there were still a couple of people I wished would’ve made things easier for me.
My teachers, for example. I could never respond when I knew an answer, but my teachers already knew I knew a lot, and so they didn’t even try to quiz me at random.
I didn’t want to linger on that. I was doing great in school, even though I wasn't being understood.
“Yeah, I’ll look into it more,” Jasper assured her, then smiled at me again. “You’re the coolest, Milow.”
“And the smartest,” Stan added, lifting a finger to emphasize his words.
“And she’s super beautiful, too,” Scottie said with a grin.
My face turned bright red for the millionth time today. They were being silly.
“Milow’s just the best,” Ashby said at last, standing up before Jasper had a chance to sit back down. He smiled down at me and placed a hand on my lower back. “Come on.”
“Are you taking her to the bathroom?” Stan asked, looking amused. “You know, she’s a big girl.”
“I have to go, too,” Ashby explained with a roll of his eyes.
I bit the inside of my cheek, my body already tense. I really had to pee. Ashby led me to the back of the diner and through the swing door. I stopped in front of the women’s bathroom and looked up at him.
“I’ll wait here,” he said, smiling gently.
I nodded. [Okay.]
After giving my hand a quick squeeze, I turned and disappeared. When I came back out, Ashby was waiting for me. He was leaning against the wall, his hands tucked into the pockets of his pants. He smiled and reached out with one hand.
“Come here.”
I’d go anywhere he wanted me to. At this point, he could handcuff me to him, and I’d follow him without hesitation.
I stepped forward, sliding my hand into his while keeping my eyes on him.
His smile stayed in place, and when I was close enough, he slipped his other hand around my waist and pulled me against him.
My body pressed into his, and I rested both hands on his chest as one of his hands came up to cup my cheek.