25. Lilian
Chapter 25
Lilian
“Like who?” I ask.
Sloan sits down beside me on the bed, a wistful smile on her lips. She reaches out, gently brushing a stray strand of hair from my face.
Her touch is soft, almost motherly. “Your mother. You have her eyes, her smile. It’s like looking at a ghost.”
My heart skips a beat. “You knew my mother?”
She nods, her gaze distant as if lost in a memory. “We were close friends in college. Inseparable, really.”
If she was close to my mother. Does Sloan know about the circumstances of my mother’s death? She wasn’t at the funeral, not that I remember.
I lean forward, desperate for any scrap of information about the woman I barely remember. “What was she like?”
A laugh escapes Sloan’s lips. “Oh, she was a real go-getter. Beautiful, kind, and fiercely loyal. I remember this one time we were at a party, and some guy was getting a little too handsy with me. Rose marched right up to him, looked him dead in the eye, and said, ‘If you don’t take your hands off my friend right now, I’ll make sure you never use them again.’ He practically ran out of the room with his tail between his legs.”
The exact opposite of me. “She sounds amazing.”
“She was.” Her voice is tinged with sadness. “Everyone loved her. She had this way of making you feel like you were the most important person in the world when she talked to you.”
Is there a thing we have in common? Did she spend most of her time in the library, too?
Sloan clears her throat. “How’s Marc doing these days?”
I blink. “Uncle Marc?”
“Yeah. I haven’t seen him since—We were all friends back in college. Marc, your parents, John, and I. We were quite the group.”
“He’s good,” I say. “Always working, though. He’s constantly at the office or traveling for business.”
“That sounds like the Marc I remember. He was always the responsible one. And how are your brothers doing?”
I freeze. “They’re doing well. Landon just won a prize, and Levi’s doing cases.”
“Hard working.”
An awkward silence settles between us, and I fidget with the edge of the duvet, unsure of what to say next .
“Well, I should let you get settled in. I’m sure you want to freshen up before dinner.” Sloan rises from the bed, smoothing out her dress.
“Thank you again for the towels and for… for telling me about my mother.”
Her expression softens, and she reaches out to give my hand a gentle squeeze. “Of course, dear. I’m so glad to have finally met you. Rose would be proud of the woman you’ve become.”
My throat tightens, tears pricking at the corners of my eyes. “Thanks.”
“And don’t mind John. He’s just… well, he’s John. He takes a while to warm up to new people, but he’ll come around.”
With that, she turns and walks out of the room, closing the door softly behind her. Why did Marc never tell me that he and my parents were friends with the Barrons?
I flop back onto the pillows, staring up at the ceiling.
Should I ask Uncle Marc?
After a quick shower, I walk down and have dinner with Sloan and Gemma while John and Sebastian are out for a business dinner.
I feel bad for monopolizing so much of his time lately. Between exams, his training, and working for his father, I know he’s been stretched thin. And yet, he’s always making time for us to be together.
Am I too selfish? Demanding too much of his attention when he has so many other responsibilities. The last thing I want is to be a burden or distraction from his goals. Sebastian is driven and ambitious, and I admire that about him. I don’t want to hold him back or make things harder than they need to be.
But I want him close. I can’t even imagine how it would be without him. Without him cuddling me to sleep or tracing soothing circles over my skin. Is it wrong to want that, to need that?
After dinner, Gemma and I drive over to Mary’s. As we pull up the long driveway, lined with stately oak trees, I’m struck by the sheer size and elegance of the place. The colonial-style mansion, with its red brick facade and towering white columns, sprawls across a beautifully landscaped property just outside the city.
Mary greets us at the door with her signature bear hugs. “Welcome, ladies!”
We follow her through the grand foyer, with its marble floors and crystal chandelier. My eyes wander over the elegant furnishings—ornate side tables displaying expensive vases and a sweeping staircase with an intricately carved banister.
“I’ve got everything set up for a fun girls’ night in my room.” Mary leads us down a hallway lined with paintings and antique mirrors. It almost looks like Uncle Marc’s.
We step into her bedroom, which is about the size of my entire dorm suite. At the center is a massive four-poster bed, draped in a velvet canopy and embroidered linens, fit for royalty. One wall is made entirely of floor-to-ceiling windows, offering a stunning view of the backyard .
Mary leads us to a cozy movie nook she’s set up. A projector casts a soft glow against the far wall, and the floor is covered in plush pillows and fuzzy blankets, all in soft shades of blush and cream. It looks irresistibly cozy, like sinking into a fluffy cloud.
“I’ve got all the essentials!” Mary gestures excitedly to a table laden with bowls of popcorn and various candies. “Salty, sweet, buttery goodness. Margaritas. And, of course, a nice selection of rom-coms to swoon and laugh over.”
Always above and beyond to make things special. It’s one of the things I love most about her.
“This is perfect.” Gemma plops down onto a cushy pillow.
Mary grins, tossing a handful of popcorn into her mouth. “Everything for my besties. Now, Lil, get your cute ass over here and help me pick a movie.”
I plop down beside her on another pillow.
Gemma reaches for the bowl of M&Ms. “Seriously, Mar, this is like a Pinterest dream come to life.”
Mary grabs the remote and starts scrolling through the movie options. “Alright, ladies, what’s first on our viewing list? Something classic like Sleepless in Seattle? Or maybe a new one?”
As they debate the merits of various films, I let myself sink further into the plush pillows. Is Sebastian back home? It’s 10 p.m. How long does such a business dinner go? I wish he were here, his strong arms holding me tight as we cuddle and watch a movie together .
Gemma waves a hand in front of my face. “What do you think, rom-com or horror?”
“Definitely rom-com.” This is girl time. I can deal with the rest later.
Mary selects a movie with a woman and a man glaring at each other. The opening credits start to roll, and I reach for a handful of popcorn.
“Okay, so I’ve got something to share.” Gemma hands us all a margarita. “You know that guy I’ve been hooking up with, Oliver?”
“Yes.” Mary and I nod eagerly.
A dreamy smile curves her lips. “I can’t stop thinking about him.”
“Did you sleep with him again?” Mary asks.
Gemma blushes. “Maybe.”
“Promise not to tell anyone, but… I think it’s turning into something more than casual,” Gemma says.
“Really?” I ask. “What makes you think that?”
“I don’t know. We’ve been hanging out more, not only hooking up, and he’s just been really sweet and attentive lately. It’s different. I think he could be more than a hookup. Maybe even boyfriend material.”
Mary’s eyes widen. “Seriously? I don’t know. He feels off.”
Gemma twirls a strand of hair around her finger. “I really like him. He makes me feel special, you know?”
“Has he said anything about wanting more?” I ask .
Gemma shrugs, averting her gaze. “Not in so many words, but it already feels like we’re a couple.”
“We haven’t met him yet. First, he needs to go through our trials,” Mary says.
“You’ve been crushing on him for a while now.” I reach over to squeeze Gemma’s hand. “Just be careful, okay?”
She sighs, her eyes flicking to the movie playing in the background. “I really want this to work out. He’s the first guy in a long time that I feel good around.”
“That’s… you deserve a good guy, Gem. I’m happy for you.” Mary snuggles closer to us, clinking her glass with ours before taking a sip.
“What about you, Mar?” Gemma asks. “Any new prospects?”
Mary leans back against the pillows, swirling her margarita. “Well, there is this one guy I can’t stop thinking about lately…”
Gemma and I exchange a glance. “Connor?” we say in unison.
“He’s so hot.”
Gemma giggles. “Sounds like someone has a huge crush.”
“Shut up! I do not.” Mary throws a pillow at her. “Ugh. It’s probably just a fantasy. And it’s stupid to get attached to someone I can’t really have.”
I know all too well what it’s like to pine after someone who is out of reach.
“Why?” I ask gently .
Mary sighs, picking at a loose thread on the blanket. “ I mean, I’ve tried to catch his eye a few times, but he always looks away. It’s like he’s deliberately avoiding me. Like he can’t wait to be farther away from me. Very far.”
“That doesn’t mean he hates you, Mar. Maybe he’s shy,” I say.
“He’s an idiot who doesn’t realize what an amazing catch you are,” Gemma adds.
“I don’t know. It’s just a stupid girl crush.” Mary takes a long sip of her margarita, her shoulders slumping. “I mean, if he was interested, wouldn’t he at least try to talk to me? Wouldn’t he want to get to know me better?”
“Hey, don’t beat yourself up over this,” I say. “If he can’t see how incredible you are, that’s his loss.”
Gemma nods. “Totally. You’re a fucking catch, Mar. Any guy would be lucky to have you.”
Am I being a hypocrite? After all, don’t I constantly question Sebastian’s feelings, analyzing every interaction for hidden meanings?
I take a large gulp of my margarita.
“Thanks, guys,” Mary says softly. “I really thought there was something there, you know? But maybe I’m fooling myself.”
The night goes on in a blur of laughter, girl talk, and margaritas. We’re on our second rom-com now, some cheesy flick about a woman who falls for her best friend’s brother. The irony isn’t lost on me .
The credits roll, and I glance at my phone. Still no texts from Sebastian. I know he’s busy, but still, I can’t ignore the little twinge of disappointment.
“We should probably head home soon.” Gemma yawns, stretching her arms over her head. “I’m about ready to pass out.”
Mary nods, stifling a yawn. “Same. This was fun, though.”
I gather the empty popcorn bowls and margarita glasses. “Definitely. Thanks, Mar.”
We say our goodbyes, hugging Mary tightly before heading back to Gemma’s place. By the time we make it, Gemma and I stumble our way inside, giggling like schoolgirls as we try to keep quiet. I thought I didn’t drink that much, but it’s kicking in.
“Shh!” she stage-whispers. “We have to be quiet, or we’ll wake everyone.”
I nod, attempting to suppress my laughter as we tiptoe through the darkened hallway.
When we reach my room, she wraps her arms around me in a tight hug. “Thanks for joining us this weekend.”
“Of course,” I murmur into her shoulder. “Thanks for inviting me.”
“Sleep well.” She gives me one last squeeze before disappearing into her room down the hall.
I slip into mine, closing the door behind me. It’s pitch black, the shadows swaying and shifting in the darkness, and I probe along the wall for the light switch .
Suddenly, a hand clamps over my mouth. I shriek, muffled by the palm pressed to my lips, and thrash against the arm winding around my waist, yanking me back against a firm chest.
“Shh.” A familiar voice murmurs in my ear. “Calm down, princess. It’s only me.”
Sebastian. I sag against him as he removes his hand from my mouth, keeping his other arm firmly around me.
“I didn’t mean to startle you.” His breath ghosts over the side of my neck. “I wanted to see you.”
My pulse begins to slow, steadying in my veins as I turn in his arms. “What are you doing here?”
“Can’t a guy check on the girl he cares about?”
Wouldn’t he have texted me at least, if he cared about me?
“I…” How do I say this without sounding needy or clingy? “How was the dinner?”
“It was fine,” Sebastian says. “But I couldn’t stop thinking about you the entire time.”
His words sound sincere. I chew my lip. What if he’s telling me what I want to hear?
“Really?” I hate how small my voice always sounds. “Because you seemed pretty tense on the drive here. And your dad…”
His arms tighten around me. “That had nothing to do with you, princess. It’s complicated.”
“Complicated how?”
He cups my face in his hands, his thumbs stroking over my cheekbones. “This isn’t the time or place to get into it. I promise I’ll explain everything when we’re back at college. ”
“But why can’t you tell me now?” I demand, frustration bubbling up inside me. “I thought we were past keeping secrets from each other. I thought we were… I don’t know, something.”
“We are something. There are things I need to figure out first.”
“What things?” I search his face, trying to read the emotions flickering behind his eyes. “Sebastian, please. I want to understand.”
“I know you do. And I want to tell you, I do. But not here. Not now. This isn’t just about us.”
“Then what is it about?” I take a step back.
He closes his eyes, exhaling slowly. “My family. My father. It’s… it’s a fucking mess, Lil. And I don’t want to drag you into it. Not yet.”
“I can handle it, and wouldn’t it help you to have someone to talk about it? I want to be there for you, just like you are for me.”
“I know, princess. And I appreciate that, I really do.” He reaches for me, and I let him pull me into his arms again. “But let me handle it my way, okay? Let me protect you from this shit for a little while longer.”
I want to argue, to demand answers. But something in his tone stops me. Something raw and almost… afraid.
So instead, I nod against his chest, breathing in the scent of him. “Okay. But promise me, as soon as we’re back—”
“I’ll tell you everything. I promise.”
I capture his lips with mine, and he responds instantly, his arms tightening around me.
“I should probably go,” he says. “Before someone catches me in here.”
Would it be bad? I don’t want to hide anymore. I wish we could be a real couple. I wish I could hold his hand in public and kiss him whenever I want. I wish I didn’t have to hide how I feel about him.
“Sweet dreams, princess.” He kisses the top of my head.
He turns to leave, but I catch his hand. “Sebastian?”
“Yeah?”
“I missed you.”
He faces me fully, his eyes flicking between mine, a hint of vulnerability shimmering behind the usual confidence.
“I missed you, too.” He strides out, closing the door behind him.
What the hell is going on with him? And how am I going to survive the party tomorrow with him there? There are probably many other girls who will throw themselves at him, like Blake.
What if… Is he going to break up with me?