Chapter 20 #2
I chuckled and stirred the pasta into the sauce. My appetite was returning, thanks to this chat with Van. “I’ll pay you in cookie salad to babysit.”
His jaw clenched mid-chew. “Yes,” he said after he swallowed. “That’ll work. You don’t owe me though.”
“I know,” I said quietly. And there went my hunger again. “I know.”
Dinner was fairly quiet. Van chowed into his meal, and I ate more than I thought I would. Afterward, we both did the dishes and then retired to the couch to watch a movie. He sat in his spot, and I tucked myself against the armrest.
The cloud over my head grew darker with each passing hour. Soon it was time for bed. Van tapped his fingers on his leg. The remote was between us, but neither one was going for it.
“I suppose we should get to bed.” Why did my voice have to sound so small?
“Yeah. Early day.”
“We actually have to leave the house.” My thready chuckle got lost in his weak one. I might as well address the elephant holding divorce papers in the room. “Is it weird that I’m not looking forward to it?” I waved my hand to gesture to the whole room. “Leaving this.”
“And the sex.”
“I will miss that too.”
He tugged my feet out from where they were curled under me. “One more time for the road?”
“Only one?” Some of the anxiety retreated, and I stretched out under him. He shut the TV off and tossed the remote onto the end table.
“I could muster two.” He rolled my leggings down. Cool air wafted over my legs. “But I don’t want you tired for tomorrow. It’s going to be a busy day.”
I’d rather be tired and distracted for tomorrow.
I yanked his shirt off. We were in leisurewear, cozy and comfortable and easily accessible.
It took both of us to get his pants down.
Soon we were naked, and he went one step further and put a blanket under me.
He was so sweet and thoughtful. I would miss— No, I would not think about that.
I would not be sad on our last night in the house.
He’d helped me get on my feet. This was a celebration.
My head would convince the ache in my chest later.
“You got big plans?” I cradled him between my legs.
“I’ve got wet plans—for you.” He pushed to his knees and shoved mine wider apart. The stricken look that passed through his features happened so fast I nearly missed it. It echoed what I felt inside.
He looked at me like he would never see me again.
I lightly scored my nails down his chest and abdomen.
His pupils blew wider, but he didn’t move. “I need to watch you come.”
Lust hit hard, but it was tinged with sadness. Would this really be our last time?
He propped a foot on the floor and leaned forward enough to cup his hands against my breasts. “You know what I’m going to think about when I jack off in my new place?”
I moaned at the rasp of his palms over my nipples and wrapped my hands around his wrists.
“This,” he said roughly. “These tits and how they fill my hands.” He skimmed his fingers down my torso, outlining my stomach and stopping at my lower abdomen. “The little swell that Bean makes.” A shadow passed over his face.
Was he thinking about how he wouldn’t see how big I’d get? Would he miss it? Would he have moved on by then?
Instead of thinking about that, I covered his hands, framing my baby belly with mine. “You’ll still be able to talk to Bean. Anytime you want.”
“Just not when you’re naked.”
“Not naked.” I chuckled, and his gaze hooked on how my boobs jiggled.
He continued his trek, snagging my hand on the way down. My fingers twined with his. “Show me how you’re going to touch yourself.”
This would be the second time he watched me. The first was in that hotel bathroom. Now it was because he wouldn’t be able to touch me when we weren’t living together.
The hungry look in his gaze prompted me to slick my finger farther down. He stayed with me the whole way. Wet heat surrounded my finger, and I found my clit. Pleasure pumped through me.
Rolling my hips into our touch, my eyelids fluttered.
“Fuck, sweet Clover. Show me how you’re going to get off when you’re not with me.”
“I’m going to do this.” I undulated my hips with the rhythm. “And I’ll think about when you use your tongue and your finger at the same time.” I was going to be thinking about him. The whole time.
He ran his hands up and down my thighs. “Push a finger inside you.”
I shifted to ditch my clit and do just that. His intake of breath when my finger disappeared inside me heightened the sensation. “How tight are you?”
“I…don’t know.” I didn’t have any experience outside of my own body.
As if he sensed my logical brain wiping out the passion, he threaded his index finger inside next to mine. I could feel myself inside and out, but I could only feel him in a weird mix that flooded me with more heat.
A hard groan left him. “So fucking tight. So damn wet. No shower is going to replicate this.” He thrust in and out. “Rub your clit.”
I did as he asked. Pleasure ping-ponged through my veins and built within my belly. As I circled faster and paired with his thrusts, I cranked closer to the top of a cliff I’d gladly fling myself off.
“Fuck, I can’t wait.” He removed his hand, but before I could whimper at the emptiness he left behind, he stroked up and down his hard erection. “Keep going.”
I hadn’t realized I’d stalled. I resumed my pace, and he drove inside.
“Van!”
His growl was his only response before he started pumping. Our grunts and moans filled the living room as we each pushed the other closer to climax. He bracketed my hips and devoured me with his eyes.
We’d had a lot of sex, but this was different. The lights were on, there was nothing between us, and we knew it’d be one of the last times together, if not the last time.
I backed away from my peak as a wave of melancholy crashed over me, but he put his thumb on my finger, adding pressure to my clit.
I was back on the edge and teetering. “Oh God.”
“That’s it, my sweet Clover. Let yourself go.”
It was the way he’d added to my nickname that shoved me over the edge. “Van!”
Ecstasy rolled over me in wave after wave, like the most blissful electrocution imaginable.
I clenched down on him, and at some point, I ended up holding his hand instead of working on myself.
The tips of my fingers grazed the slick flesh of his cock, but we held still, our breaths sawing in and out of us.
His gaze traveled from where we were connected, up to my face, and back down. “Well,” he said quietly, “that should get me through a few shower sessions.”