Chapter 4
KNOX
“Are we hitting the club?” Asher asks after another win on the road.
Weston and Asher usually go out when we’re on the road, neither liking hanging around hotel rooms. They always invite Jude and I to tag along, but we usually decline for different reasons.
Me, because I was committed to Madison, even if I didn’t love her as much as I should have. Jude never goes out anymore.
We’re in Seattle tonight, and even though we’re close enough to head home on a short flight, the guys want to go out.
It’s on the tip of my tongue to refuse, but I realize I don’t have a good reason to.
I don’t have a girlfriend to rush home to, not anymore.
Besides, I need to keep my new publicist in work.
Thinking about her makes me irrationally angry, and hard.
It’s a confusing mixture. I know that she’s not the one choosing to make my life difficult, but she’s the one in front of me.
I almost feel bad for her, but not enough.
Gerry is responsible for what will happen to that girl.
I might love the guy as a father, but I’m not going to let anyone try and control me.
After our meeting with the PR firm a few days ago I did some research about my new publicist, Sloane.
I’ve never reacted so strongly to a woman, not even Madison.
She’s so different from the tall blondes I’ve always dated.
First she’s very short, probably no taller than five-two.
Her hair is the deepest, darkest brown and reaches down to her waist. Her skin has a slightly olive tone, even though she’s somehow still pale.
It gives her an ambiguous quality and unfortunately triggers an urge to try and uncover her mysteries.
To make matters worse, for me, her eyes seem to glow a smoky silver.
She’s stunning, and it kind of pisses me off.
There was a time a small delicate girl like her would have brought out my protective side.
That was before getting cheated on. When I saw her in that room I wanted something I’ve never wanted before.
I wanted to break her. That is fucked up enough, but I also want to possess her.
The conflicting desires should scare me.
I’m not that guy, or at least I wasn’t. Now the only thing I know for sure is they gave her to me, and I’m going to play with my new toy until she’s too broken to enjoy. Only then will I let her go.
After catching Madison fucking some guy I’ve sworn off relationships, and Sloane Cordero is not the kind of girl that does casual.
That’s the second problem. I was preparing to graduate from high school when she was born.
I know it’s not uncommon for athletes to pursue much younger women, but I am not just an athlete.
I am also the heir to a major corporation, which puts extra scrutiny on me by my family.
All of that would carry so much more weight with me if I wanted anything more from Sloane.
As it is, I like the fact that she’s vulnerable.
Audra made it clear that her fate was in my hands.
Not information you should hand to someone in my state of mind.
Not that Audra is aware of how much I’ve changed, but that isn’t my problem.
“Let’s go,” I tell the guys.
They also haven’t noticed the storm brewing inside of me. It’s like a switch has been flipped off. There are so many people out to use me, I feel like getting some of my own back. Poor Sloane is the one unlucky enough to have been placed in my crosshairs.
“Woohoo!” Asher whoops. “Jude, since the old man is going, does that mean you might grace us with your presence?”
“Yeah right,” he says and continues to shove his gear into his bag.
“Ignore him,” Weston says before Asher can push. “The three of us are going out again for the first time in years.”
Asher calls ahead to get us on the list for Luxure, the hot new club in downtown Seattle.
It’s not far from the hotel the team booked us into, which is lucky because I plan to crawl my way back into my room.
The younger guys on the team stay with a roommate, but the three of us have earned some perks after spending the last sixteen years playing for the same team.
That’s good considering I won’t be returning to the hotel alone.
I need to find a woman to relieve a different craving.
It also comes with the added benefit of laying a mess at Sloane’s feet.
Hooking up with a woman alone won’t be enough to do it, but I’m sure I can find just the wrong one to slake both my need for pussy and payback.
Doesn’t matter if she didn’t do anything to me.
For the last few weeks the only interest I’ve had has been in pills. I still have enough presence of mind to know that I’m standing at the edge of a dangerous cliff. This is the first time I’ve managed to push through the craving since I gave into the relief the drugs offered.
There’s more than one way to get high though.
It’s been a while since I gave into my darker desires, but there are plenty of women willing to spread their legs for a famous athlete.
Puck chasers have their uses, and they don’t care if I remember their name as long as they get a picture and a story to tell.
They let you use them, and I did. There was a time I enacted my more demanding side with them.
Madison was very vanilla, and for her I shoved my urges into the deepest parts of myself.
I thought I was fine with it, but opening the door to these urges feels like stretching after being cooped up too long.
While my mind walks through all the ways I can cause some damage tonight, we arrive at the club.
I’ve been losing time lately, but this time it’s not because I downed a bunch of pills with booze.
Asher’s idea to go out tonight might be what saves me.
At least from the more self-destructive path I’m on.
When our driver parks in front of the entrance, I follow the guys out of the car.
We bypass the line, and the bouncer doesn’t hesitate to lift the velvet rope and let us walk through.
There are a few shouts from the line, people who either don’t recognize us, or are pissed off that we beat their team tonight.
Either way I don’t really give a shit. Ever since my fans turned on me I’ve grown sour to being famous.
There’s only one use for the attention that comes with my job, and I plan to make the most of it tonight.
Pulsing lights flash along the writhing bodies on the dance floor.
Not a single cell of my body desires to push my way into that crush of people.
When I was younger I lived for a scene like this.
The pounding of the music made me feel like my pulse existed outside of my body.
It was another kind of high, feeling all that energy from strangers sharing the movement of their bodies.
Now all I want is to watch from a distance. Until I find what I’m looking for at least.
We’re met by a VIP hostess and shown to a private section on the second level. The guys order bottles of Cristal to celebrate our win, but I wave off a glass when they bring it to me.
“I’ll take a Scotch, neat. Make it a double,” I order instead.
The waitress preens, but she’s not what I’m looking for.
“Just the drink,” I say dismissively.
I look down at the crowd and see a blonde dancing in the middle of a group of girls. She’s wearing a cheap tiara and a sash that says “bride” on it.
She’s perfect for what I need. Maybe I feel the need to test her loyalty to her fiancé, or maybe it’s because she looks so much like Madison, but tarnishing her a little bit sends a thrill through me.
There’s a bouncer guarding the entrance to our section, and I whistle for his attention. I’m fully aware that’s an asshole move, but I no longer care how people see me. More work for my little toy. I smile thinking about the mess she’s going to have to untangle.
The bouncer comes over and I point to the bachelorette party. “Bring them up here.”
He shifts his weight between his feet. “Sir, there are many women here tonight.”
“Yes, and I want you to bring me them.”
He doesn’t protest again. Pity. I might have respected him if he’d shown a little backbone. Besides, no one is going to make her fuck me. If she’s more loyal than my ex she will refuse.
I watch him push his way through the crowd and speak to the women.
Send him away. I think toward them. If they do, maybe I’ll have a little more faith in women. Maybe it’ll be enough to save Sloane from the plans I’m forming in that dark place I’ve unleashed.
Of course the women live up to my lowest expectations.
A bitter laugh escapes me as they follow the bouncer to the VIP section.
I can’t help but think I’m saving some poor bastard from being married to a woman who would cheat so easily.
They’d be better off not throwing away a future for a moment touching fame.
This is a lesson she clearly needs to learn the hard way.
I can hear the five women giggling on their way up the stairs. I know Asher and Weston won’t object to five beautiful women joining us.
“Oh my god! You really are Knox Rennick. The bouncer said, but I didn’t believe him,” the bride gushes.
I pluck at the sash she’s wearing. “Was it a good idea to follow him?”
She looks confused. “Why wouldn’t I? It’s not every day you get to meet a famous athlete.”
Right. So much for that thin thread of hope I tried to cling to.
“Now that I’ve got you here, what do you want me to do with you?” I almost choke on the words, but this is the fantasy she came for. That’s all I am to them after all, an adventure, a story to tell, a fantasy.
She twirls a lock of her blonde hair. “What do you want to do with me?”
That is a good question. Now that I have her here my dick is completely uninterested.