Chapter 5
SLOANE
“Let’s go,” Knox demands.
How did everything turn on me so quickly? I came here, full of confidence I’d make him see reason. How could he not want to save his career from being tarnished by scandal? Admittedly, I don’t actually know that much about Knox Rennick, other than he’s painfully attractive and plays hockey.
Since Audra threw me at his feet a few days ago, I had to do an internet search about why he needed a publicist in the first place. It wasn’t difficult to find information, and after fifteen minutes I realized Audra hadn’t thrown me to his feet, she threw me to the wolves.
I’d mistakenly thought at that time that it was the executives at Black, Manning, and Webb who would determine my fate.
Not that I thought that Knox would be easy to handle, but I expected he’d be like every other man in my life, either be oblivious to my existence or only notice me when I had something he needed.
I guess the second one still holds true, but even though I’m twenty-one, I never imagined a man would need me for that.
My eyes slip to the bulge in his jeans and I force them away. A move he doesn’t miss. I have a fear he doesn’t miss much. Certainly not the way the tips of my ears have gotten hot and red.
“Don’t worry, I’ll let you get acquainted with my dick since you seem so fascinated with it,” he says in a rough voice.
I’ve read about that sound before, but never actually heard it. I’ve seen it attempted in movies and TV shows, but I never thought it sounded sexy before.
I shake my head. No. I will not find Knox Rennick sexy. He’s a brute. I am attracted to men with brains and goals that don’t include crashing a bachelorette party to sully the bride.
“No words, baby girl? That’s not a problem, I’d rather not talk anyway,” he says. He’s so smug thinking I’m just going to go along with the ridiculous things he said to me when we were still at the club.
Like I’m just going to go back to the hotel with him and…and…well, it was clear what he was suggesting.
His eyes narrow. “I can see the wheels spinning a bit fast inside that head of yours. Let us get something straight right now. You are coming up to my room, and—” he takes my hand and places it over his groin. Then he starts stroking himself with my hand under his.
My mouth falls open, and even though inside my head I’m yelling at myself to pull my hand free, I can’t. I also can’t explain why I can’t. For some reason, whenever he touches me, my will seems to evaporate, and all that my body seems to care about is what he wants.
“—You will be helping me fix this situation. Need I remind you that your precious job relies on you keeping me happy?”
His words are like a bucket of ice water, and exactly what I need to force my traitorous will to allow me to pull my hand free from his.
“For your information,” I start with my haughtiest tone, “I don’t have to keep you happy.
I have to keep you out of trouble. The way I figure, the best way to cover your scandals is to keep you from making any more in the future.
How hard can it be? You’ve had sixteen years without even a blemish until recently. ”
“You don’t have to keep me happy, huh? I’ll tell you that I’m not very happy right now, and tonight is what happens when I’m not happy. Right now I’m pissed actually. How many scandals do you think I can provoke before Gerry decides that your firm isn’t doing enough to manage me?”
I honestly didn’t think he would purposely tank what was left of his career, so I haven’t even considered how many scandals I might have to take care of.
“Why would you try to ruin your career?”
He gives me a look that is just as scathing as his words have been to this point.
“How much of my career do you honestly think is left? I’m thirty-eight years old, my shoulder is rapidly going to shit, and my fans decided to believe my cheating ex-girlfriend’s lies and started hating me.
Let’s face it, this last season will tarnish what was practically perfect before now.
What is there left for me to salvage? Do you think I give a flying fuck what a bunch of strangers think since they can’t even show a basic amount of media literacy to see that when the boyfriend comes home, throws a half naked man out onto the street, shoves his disheveled girlfriend in a cab with a packed bag, that maybe, just maybe he isn’t the one being an asshole? ”
He’s breathing hard, and his hands are curled into tight fists, but I don’t fear him.
Honestly, I expected I would have had to pry information out of him to get to the root of what caused the storm he found himself in.
There’s a vulnerability to him that I also didn’t anticipate.
Of course, he goes and ruins it when he opens his mouth again.
“Since you’ve been thrust into my world, I’ve decided to make the most of a bad thing.
I didn’t want a publicist. I don’t like being manipulated, and that is what you people do for a living.
You all twist information to make the public see something other than what is there.
If I have to put up with you, have to behave myself, then you are going to make this hell tolerable.
If I tell you to get on your knees and suck my cock, that’s what you’re going to do.
If you’re a really good girl, and I think deep down you are, then I’ll cooperate and help you secure a job after your internship.
I’m sure Audra had to dangle something in front of you to be so keen on putting everything on the line. ”
“I’m not doing that,” I practically hiss the last word.
He gives me a look that has me trying to press harder against the wall. “Oh, you’ll do whatever I say. Of course, you could always quit your job and take your chances that you’ll find another qualifying internship.”
My mouth falls open, and he smirks. He knows I can’t just find another internship at my current level.
I’ve worked with Black, Manning, and Webb for the last couple of years, working my way up from an admin assistant.
This internship didn’t just exist. I created it with long hours, and the sacrificing of any social life I might have had in college.
I’d have done more if it was what I had to do for my baby brother, Xander. I had two parents for fourteen years, and now he barely even had a father. This is the last thing I can do for my mother, who made me promise on her death bed that I’d look after her baby.
Knox has me exactly where he seems to want me. He’s older, rich, and worse holds my future in the palm of his hands. Losing my virginity it seems is not nearly as costly as what losing this opportunity would be.
There’s really nothing left to say, so I nod. I’m not sure my agreement was ever really needed though. In fact, I think he prefers that I would rather be anywhere else.
I’ve never been in a hotel room before, but I can’t imagine most are as elegant as Knox’s suite at the Hawthorne. In fact, I’m not sure normal people like myself ever have cause to enter this establishment if they aren’t working here.
I laugh to myself, in a way I am working.
Whatever I’m about to do with Knox, and I’m sad to say my naivety has left me painfully unprepared to know what that might be, is part of my job now.
I wanted to be a publicist, not a prostitute.
I also wanted my mother to beat the odds of her cancer, so you’d think I’d be used to disappointment by now.
He watches me with a glimmer in his eyes as I move around the room trying to delay the inevitable as much as possible.
“Are you a virgin, baby girl?”
His voice startles me. It has that gruff quality to it again. Then it occurs to me that maybe if I tell him the truth he’ll be turned off by my lack of experience. The couple of dates I’ve gone on since I’ve been in college, the guys barely tried to mask their disgust at my status.
“Yes,” I whisper.
Instead of recoiling from me, my admission seems to excite him more. His tongue slowly comes out to lick his bottom lip, and he lets his eyes travel my body slowly.
“Have you ever been touched at all?” He holds his breath while he waits for my answer.
I shake my head. I’m sure it’s painfully obvious. I sometimes feel like there’s a neon sign hanging over my head labeling me undateable.
Not that Knox wants to date me.
Control me, touch me, bully me, but I don’t think any kind of emotional investment is being offered with this transaction. I still have hope he won’t want me after I confirm that I’m completely innocent, despite the flash of arousal I saw in his eyes.
I realize he’s not like the couple boys I went to coffee with as he continues to speak. “You shouldn’t have told me the truth. What you just admitted is too irresistible for a man like me. I’m afraid you’re truly fucked now. As you gathered from my verbal diarrhea earlier, my ex cheated on me.”
I have no idea where he is going with this admission. What did his ex cheating have to do with the fact that I’ve been a pathetically isolated loner for the last seven years?
He stares at me waiting for a response, so I nod my head. My heart is practically moved into my throat, and I don’t know if I could speak right now if I bothered to try.
“I’m not looking for a relationship. I won’t be your boyfriend, hold your hand, or any of that other mushy shit you’ve probably dreamed about.
I’m going to fuck you. You will enjoy it, but you may also hate me.
That’s fine. Hate me if you want, but you will obey me.
Which means you will follow my two main rules. ”
I’d like to say I’m facing his words with a spine of steel. I might be on the verge of compromising my morals, but at least I can say what I’m doing is to continue to protect the person I love most. If I lose this job, I don’t know how much longer I can keep the three of us afloat.
“What are your rules?” I ask him when he seems determined to drag out the world’s most awkward dramatic pause.