Chapter 41
Forty-One
C ooper
I hate these stupid parties our father drags us to. I thought we’d have to go to less of them once we finished graduate school and got busy with work. Nope. We have to go to even more of them, even on our short vacations.
We’re on Nantucket for a break, and Dad insisted we appear at a yacht club party. The man doesn’t even like yachts, but his new wife does, so he bought her one. This is his third wife, by the way. The second one since Mom died.
His first one, Malory, only lasted a few years.
She was a control freak who made the mistake of trying to control our father.
At least this new one, Kayla, keeps to herself, though I won’t be surprised if this marriage ends in divorce as well.
She’s only a few years older than us, but dumb as a doornail.
She’s arm candy for Dad, nothing more, and he’ll grow tired of her.
I go for the bar, and then Ethan and I start to mingle. Right when I’m getting comfortable, bright auburn hair catches the corner of my eye, and I turn to find Sybil and her cousin Arden.
They’re standing together, heads bent together conspiratorially. They’re smiling, probably because they haven’t seen us yet.
I watch as Gregory Laurence takes Arden away to introduce her to people and show her off, but it’s Sybil I can’t stop staring at. Eventually, she sees us. Her eyes bounce between us like she doesn’t know which brother to look at, her face paling.
Looking is too painful, so I turn and stride away.
There’s going to be arguing soon. Drama. Our dads won’t be able to stop themselves from jabbing at each other. I don’t want any part. Fuck that.
I end up by the water, staring at the rows of docked boats and finishing my whiskey. I wish I didn’t care so much or want to go home as badly as I do.
Someone approaches, but they don’t seem to notice me. I don’t care. Then I turn to find Sybil, and I very much do care.
“I bet you’re loving this, aren’t you?” I ask, stepping from the shadows.
She stops in her tracks, her expressive eyes seeing right through me. “Loving what?”
I laugh bitterly, looking her up and down and stepping forward until we’re only inches apart.
I take a strand of her hair and twist it between my fingers.
“You got your way, Sybil. You cut us out of your life. Is it fun to come to a party and show off your new cousin and pretend we’re not even here? ”
She doesn’t look like she got her way. She looks shattered by my words. Then angry. Walls fly up, shutting her off from me entirely.
And me? I’m affected. Why does seeing Sybil again feel so angry? I expected sadness, and I hoped for nonchalance, but instead I’m so fucking mad.
I loved her. And she walked away so easily.
“You act like I wanted to cut you out, Cooper,” she whispers. “I didn’t want to. I had to. There’s a difference.”
I shake my head. “Your lack of accountability is truly astonishing.”
The energy between us shifts.
“Don’t you dare judge me.” Her green eyes narrow, going dark. “You have no idea what I gave up.”
I shift closer. “Don’t I?” My voice is hoarse with frustration.
Why the fuck does she have to be so beautiful? Everything about this woman draws me to her. I used to love her for it, but now I hate her for it. Yeah, I’ve grown bitter over the years, but I’m smarter, too. I have her to thank for that.
“What are you saying?” She swallows hard, her slender throat bobbing.
“You threw away something special and refuse to admit it.”
“Ethan and I never would’ve worked out. I see that now.”
“I’m not talking about Ethan.”
Her breath catches. “What do you mean?”
“I mean you and me, Sybil. There was something between us. Friendship, yes… or maybe something more. I don’t know, but you broke it. You broke us. And you did it on purpose.”
I don’t think I’ve ever been so bold with her, but I’ve had years to think about this conversation. All the things I’ve wanted to say have been building and building. Meeting Arden only made it worse.
“There was never anything between us besides friendship, Cooper.”
Lies. And they hurt like a knife to the back. “Don’t be fake with me, Valentine. I know you better than that.”
“Don’t call me that. I’m not that anymore.”
My eyes narrow. “But you were.”
Does she need me to spell it out for her?
“It was one kiss, Cooper. A long time ago. You need to get over yourself.”
I wince, hating myself immediately for the reaction. There was something in that kiss. I’m not crazy.
A cascade of soft auburn curls spills down around her bare shoulders and back.
Her breasts heave up and down with her breath—breasts that look a size larger than the last time I saw her.
Fuck me for noticing, but I can’t help myself.
I have the sudden urge to wrap her hair around my fist, twist it until she gasps, then silence that gasp with my tongue.
Instead, I step away.
“How is Arden doing?” I ask, forcing myself to calm down by changing the subject. “Is she happy?”
I need to get a hold of myself before I do something truly stupid. I’m spiraling out of control, and I hate that. I’ve worked hard to suppress wild emotions for the last few years and need to fucking act on those emotions before I lose it.
Her eyebrows draw together. “Why do you care? I know how your family treated her.”
“Oh, do you now?” I highly doubt she knows everything about that summer, but maybe I’m wrong. Arden was a closed book to me, so it’s hard to imagine her opening up to Sybil, but maybe she did. Things change. Maybe Arden did, too.
“Yup. I know all about it,” she quips.
“So you know about the time we almost fucked but didn’t because Ethan pulled my naked ass off of her?” I say, hoping to get a rise out of her.
Her cheeks flame. “W–what?”
I shrug. “Don’t worry. We didn’t do anything, but we wanted to.”
“You’re a dick.”
I shrug. “Why do you care so much? You jealous?”
“You wish.” Her cheeks are flaming, and her eyes are focused on my mouth. It sends a jolt through me, right down to my cock.
“Want to know what I liked most about Arden?” I prod. “She reminded me of you.” My eyes flick down to her lips. “But without the prissy attitude.”
Her glare is lethal. “What the hell is wrong with you? Are you high or drunk or something?”
“Right now, I’m too sober. Want to get drunk together and make some bad decisions?”
She’s speechless for once, which is exactly what I wanted. I’m being an asshole, but I need to know if she’s missed me like I’ve missed her.
“What? Nothing to say?” I smirk. “Maybe we should have hate-sex. I’ve never tried it. Sounds fun.”
“You know what? Do whatever you want, Cooper. Drink or get high or whatever. Honestly, I don’t care.”
Ouch . “It’s okay,” I retaliate, my voice dangerously low. “You don’t have to keep tabs on me, but I do keep tabs on you. Your sex life has become as infamous as your last name.”
Her face falls, and I immediately want to take it back, but I’m too angry to do the right thing. Too proud. Too broken. Too much of a fucking asshole.
“You’re judging my sex life? That’s rich, coming from you.”
I laugh bitterly. “You must’ve realized that sex with no attachment is the best sex, huh? Better than my brother, is it?”
“It’s none of your fucking business,” she hisses, her eyes filling with anger and unshed tears.
It should feel nice to get some honest emotion out of her, but it doesn’t. It just leaves me gutted.
Arden appears in my peripheral. “Are you okay?” she asks, concern laced in her tone.
Sybil and I answer with a quick, simultaneous, “Fine.”
Arden steps next to her cousin, folding her arms over her chest and glowering at me. Seeing her dressed up makes the family resemblance even more striking. I have to catch myself from gaping at them. They look more like twins than Ethan and I do.
“This is a new look,” I say to her, trying to sound positive, but it comes out mocking.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Sybil’s immediately on guard.
I lighten my tone. “Only that you’re different. I didn’t say it was bad. Maybe it’s a good thing.”
It’s not entirely a good thing.
Seeing the confidence in her that wasn’t there before is a great thing. She has a family she didn’t have before. But knowing whatever friendship we have is decimated? That she hates me? That part sucks.
There’s so much I want to say to her, but Sybil quickly grabs her cousin’s hand and drags her away.
I don’t know if I should go after them, don’t know my place in this situation anymore.
Maybe I have none at all. I’m conflicted as hell when Arden looks over her shoulder at me, and I catch a glimpse of the girl I used to know. I make up my mind, going after them.
As soon as I catch up, Sybil shoots me a scathing glare, but what I have to say isn’t for Sybil. I need to get this off my chest.
“I should’ve realized you were related to the Laurences the first time I saw you, Arden. I can’t believe I chalked it up to coincidence. You two look even more alike in person.”
“Like I said, it’s none of your business,” Sybil answers for Arden, and I have to stop myself from telling her off for it. I swear, this woman is going to be the death of me.
“You should’ve called me,” I try with them both. “At least when you met her and learned the truth, you could have picked up the phone. We don’t have to hate each other just because our parents are idiots.”
I’m expecting to be put in my place by Sybil, but Arden is the one to do it.
“Are you kidding?” She laughs. “Am I forgetting the part where you gave me your number? Oh, that’s right, you didn’t.
You pulled that frost cold-shoulder bullshit on me for weeks before you left.
Even if I could have called you, I wouldn’t have. ”
Sybil was trying to get Arden to walk away a minute ago, but now she drops her hand and turns on me, pressing her hands against my chest to push me away.
I don’t move. I’m frozen to the spot, staring at her.
There’s so much hurt in her eyes, and it makes my heart shatter.
But that’s the thing about shattered hearts—they’re repaired best by building thicker walls.
“And you should have called me ,” Sybil hisses. “The second Arden walked into your house and you saw the family resemblance, you should have picked up your phone. But you didn’t, did you? I had to find out from my parents months after you guys met her.”
Is she for real?
I’m so fucking frustrated I could scream.
Yes, I should’ve called her, but she’s acting like she wasn’t the one to cut me from her life. I’m not the only one who messed up.
“I guess we’re even,” I growl, searching her face for something I can use to make this right. Regret? Forgiveness? Or even some goddamn understanding would be nice.
She shakes her head slowly and inches back, her face an unreadable mask. “We’re not even. We’re not anything.”
Those words are like salt sucking me dry. The worst part? She means them. She’s not so unreadable after all.
“Let’s go.” Arden leads her away, and I don’t follow and or say anything more. Sybil got the last word, and all I can do is accept she’s right about one thing.
Sybil Laurence and me?
We’re not anything.