Chapter 4 #3
Before driving to her townhome in The Falls, I stop by Brewed Bean and pick up a white chocolate latte for me and that nasty ass matcha latte she loves. Her white Infiniti is parked in her driveway. I park beside it and get out. The front door opens before I can ring her bell.
“When I say perfect timing, this is perfect ass timing,” she gushes as she practically snatches the cup from my hand. “Please say this is mine,” she sighs.
“It is. What’s going on?” I ask because although her hair is back in a perfect bun and her face looks flawless, she sounds a little frantic.
“Girl, I just need to have a conversation with a person who talks back. I was about to call Sundae but her ass barely answers when she’s working. And I thought you were at the office.”
“I took off to handle the insurance stuff,” I tell her, then close the door.
“Oh, right. That was today,” she sighs. “Forgive my new mommie brain. What did they say?”
“What they should have said all along. It was an accident and I’ll get the money next week, probably Monday.”
“Oh, Adora! Yes! That is so good,” she gushes before wrapping her arms around me. We embrace for a much-needed long moment then walk into her living room. My little godangel is in her bassinet sleeping by the sofa. When I step toward it, Kandi says, “Please don’t wake her. I just got her to sleep.”
“Can I at least kiss her lil chubby cheek?” I plead.
“Girl, go ahead but I swear if you wake her, she’s going with you,” she says, teasing.
“And she can definitely do that,” I snap playfully before leaning in and kissing both of Jazzmyn’s chubby cheeks. “She’s so precious,” I tell Kandi before sitting on the sofa next to her.
“Precious and demanding,” she says with a smile. “Her little lungs are powerful.”
“Is she sleeping through the night yet?” I ask and she rolls her eyes, hard.
“I wish,” she sighs. “But my hubby is so good. He gets up with her a lot and lets me sleep. My mom wants her this weekend but I don’t know. As tired as I am, I love every minute with my little angel. I can’t have her away from me that long.”
“It’s your mom and I’m sure you and Chad can use some alone time.”
“To just sleep because that’s all I would do,” she says while grinning. Then, she takes a long sip from her latte. “Mmm. Thank you for this. It’s heaven. But enough about me. Let’s talk about you and this policy. They finally came to their senses.”
“Yes and it took a sista,” I tell her. “The lady who helped me when I lost it last week turned out to be a senior agent. She stepped in and made it happen.”
“Look at God!”
“I know, right? Whew! And I’m so thankful. What he was saying…that shit was eating at me. My momma would never, you know?”
“I know, bestie. I know. But what are you going to do now? A hundred Gs is a lot of money.”
“I know,” I say while shaking my head. “After I pay off my car and the girls ‘tuition, I’m going to set up fifteen-thousand-dollar accounts for Romi and Averi. They can get the money when they turn eighteen and the rest, I’m saving.”
“What about you? For fun? You have been through it and deserve something to put a smile back on your face.”
“I’m good,” I utter, no truth in my words, but my best friend knows me.
“You’re not and that’s fine,” she says before placing her hand on my knee.
“You will be good and part of getting there is taking care of yourself. Why don’t you book yourself a staycation?
Go to The Metropolitan, book a facial and massage, order room service, and just relax.
Pick a weekend and I’ll keep my goddaughters. ”
“I don’t know,” I admit.
“Well, I do. Hell, if you want to be adventurous, take your ass to Seventh Heaven and get your back blown out for a weekend,” she says, then laughs.
“I wish I would take my ass to a sex club. That’s a hell no.”
“But you need some dick,” she says matter of factly and I damn near spit my latte out.
“Bitch what!” I gasp.
“You heard me. You need a man, bestie. Romi is four. It’s been long enough.”
Her words are true as fuck and I can’t even argue.
Rush’s stupid ass is the last man I’ve been with.
I was pregnant when he was sentenced and somewhat still with him his first year and a half inside.
When I finally ended things with him, I was over men and stayed single.
Between my girls and my job, I have enough on my plate.
Adding a man and a relationship seemed like too much to add, so I stayed single.
“It’s been a minute but I don’t have time for a man. Besides, with the girls, I don’t know. I don’t want to disrupt things for them and I don’t want to be parading different men around them.”
“I’ve known you for all twenty-eight years of your life. You’ve never had a parade of dudes, so miss me with that. Stop being scared and be open. You deserve to be happy all around and especially under a damn man.”
Although I’m laughing at her craziness, I’m also listening and taking her words in.
I’m not lonely because I have my babies.
We have each other but I do miss what a man, well, a good, non-narcissistic man, brings to the table.
I want to feel safe and secure in strong arms. I miss a man’s hands on my body, and lord knows, I’m tired of my plastic and silicone replacements.
“We’ll see. If I meet a good man, I’ll try to smile,” I say and we both laugh.
Over our lattes, we talk and catch up and my godbaby stays asleep the entire time.
She never opens her eyes for me but I do steal more cheek kisses before I leave.
I make it to Little Einsteins ten minutes before dismissal and the girls and I are home, showered and finished eating our take-out spaghetti dinners from Redmond’s Soul Food by seven-thirty.
Their video visit with Rush tonight is later than normal.
He should be popping up on the screen in five minutes.
“I got time to go pee?” Romi asks.
“To the bathroom, yes. Go ahead,” I tell her as I pour my lemon drop.
She practically jumps out of the chair, bypasses the guest bathroom, and rushes into their room. Averi stands too and places her empty water bottle in the trash. She yawns as she walks back to the table.
“You getting sleepy?” I ask and she nods.
“Well, as soon as the visit is over, you can go to bed.”
“Can we talk to Daddy in the room?”
“If you want.”
“I want to and Romi will too,” she assures me.
“Okay. Go in your room and I’ll grab your iPad.”
She walks to their room and I unplug the iPad, grab it and a food tray, then follow her.
When I walk in, she’s already in her bed.
Romi walks out of the bathroom and Averi motions her over to join her.
As soon as Romi is beside Averi, I place the tray on their laps and prop up the iPad. I log in right on time.
“Bitch! Why the fuck you ignoring my gotdamn family!” Rush roars as soon as his face appears. Mortified and pissed the hell off, I snatch up the iPad. “Bitch, you hear me!” he spits and I mute the volume.
“I don’t want to talk to Daddy no more,” Averi says with tears forming in her eyes.
“Me neither, Mommie,” Romi pouts. She’s my little empath, and when either Averi or I are sad or cry, she feels it deeply.
Every ounce of me is angry and I want to curse his stupid ass out but I can’t. Not in front of them. I look at the screen, shake my head in disgust as he continues to rage out on mute, then end the visit. He doesn’t deserve any more of their time and I will not subject them to him again.
After easing onto Averi’s bed, I remove the tray then wipe the tears from Averi’s cheek. “Don’t cry, baby,” I tell her.
“But Daddy was mad and yelling bad words at you,” she says with a shaky voice.
“I’m scared,” Romi adds.
“It’s okay and there’s nothing to be scared of.
He was using bad words and that’s not nice at all but I’m okay and you two are okay, right?
” I say, as comforting as I can, suppressing my anger.
My babies are upset and shaken and I don’t want them to know I feel the same damn way.
“Come on. Let’s have a sleepover in my bed,” I say and they both smile. “Get your pillows.”
Almost instantly soothed, they both grab their Little Mermaid pillows, climb out of the bed, and follow me to my room.
While they climb into my bed, I walk out, take a deep ass breath, then turn out all the lights in the kitchen and living room.
My cell starts ringing on the counter and I grab it.
It’s Rushmore’s mom. I don’t even bother to answer because I already know she’s calling with some BS on behalf of her stupid ass son.
I send her to my voicemail then place my phone on do not disturb for the night.
Then I return to my room. Just that fast, Averi is fast asleep and Romi is sprawled across her pillow and yawning.
As I look at my precious little girls, one thing becomes clear as spring water, I’m not subjecting them to Rush and his shit again.